Chapter Three: iHave Car Trouble
"Sam, wake up," Freddie whispered, shaking the blonde girl's shoulder. She was stretched out across the front seat with her legs on Freddie's lap. "Wake up!"
"Nurgh…" Sam groaned, swatting Freddie away while keeping her eyes closed. "Just five more hours…"
"What does nurgh mean?"
"It's Italian for nub." Even in her sleep, Sam was cranky.
Freddie sighed. "I stopped at a gas station. I need you to help me fill up the tank. We're almost empty."
Sam groaned and forced her eyes open. "I thought the 'E' stood for ESPN."
"No…why would you even think…never mind. I don't want to know. Unless you want to push the car all the way to Canada, come help me."
Sam glared at him as she sat up and unbuckled her seatbelt. "Why can't Carly help you? What, a gas station isn't romantic enough for you?" She found the smell of gasoline very attractive.
"Oh, just come on!"
Sam reluctantly climbed out of the car and followed Freddie over to the gas pump. Freddie was surprised when Sam grabbed the nozzle and stuck it inside the square-shaped hole on the side of the car.
"Where did you learn how to do this?" Freddie asked. He knew Pam didn't care enough to teach her how.
"I don't think we have enough time to tell you the story about the pope and the ketchup stain."
"But what does that have to do with…never mind. I don't want to know. It's probably illegal."
"Oh, it is." Sam finished filling the Prius with gas and pointed at the little store in front of them. "Now go pay so we can get back on the road. I want to get to Canada and eat Canadian food!"
"Yes, sir," Freddie laughed, saluting Sam like he was in the military. He started walking toward the store.
"Get me a root beer while you're in there!" Sam shouted behind him. "But if it's diet, I'll kill you."
"I'll keep that in mind," Freddie yelled back as he entered the small air-conditioned store.
He knew Sam would run out of fat cakes before the trip was over, so he picked up twenty more for her. He also got the root beer and checked forty-seven times to make sure it wasn't diet. He accidentally bought her a diet soda once and it hadn't ended well. He could still hear the screams sometimes…
He walked up to the cash register and paid for the snacks and gas. A goth girl with purple streaks in her hair smiled at him as he handed her cash.
"So," she said, twirling a strand of purple hair around her finger, "where are you going?"
Freddie blushed. "Uh…" Where was he going? He couldn't remember! It started with a C… "The place with the maple leaves."
The goth girl giggled. "You mean Canada? Cool. That's where I'm from."
"Sorry about that," Freddie muttered, wanting to get back to Sam and Carly as fast as possible. Was it his imagination, or was she flirting with him?
Goth girl laughed and handed him the items in a paper bag. "Here you go, Freddie."
"I didn't tell you my name."
"I recognize you from iCarly," she explained. "I'm a huge fan. You're my favorite. I wish you would get more screen time."
Freddie forced a smile and picked up the paper bag. "I should really go…"
The goth girl looked disappointed. "Bye. Wait, take this!" She handed him a tube of cinnamon bun-flavored lip gloss. "Something to remember me by."
"That's really…weird…" Freddie rushed out of the store. He sighed with relief when he reached the car. Carly was still asleep and Sam was sitting shotgun, looking impatient.
"What took so long, Fredface?" Sam huffed as Freddie started up the car. "Whatever. Did you get my root beer?"
Freddie handed her the bag and Sam nearly tore it apart to get to the can of soda. "And you got fat cakes!" she cheered, biting into one happily. "Son of a duck, this is good!"
"A duck?" Freddie raised an eyebrow.
"Maybe I didn't need to bring that shovel, Freddie," Sam said, grinning. "If you keep being this useful, I won't have to bury anything…or anyone."
"Is that supposed to be a compliment or a threat?" Freddie gulped and decided to ignore that little comment.
"What's this?" Sam held up the lip gloss and sniffed it suspiciously. "It smells like-"
"Cinnamon buns," interrupted Freddie. "I got it for free. I thought you would like it since it smells like food." He didn't tell her the goth girl gave it to him because she had a crush on him.
"Mama does love cinnamon buns." Sam didn't typically wear makeup, but it smelled so good that she smeared some on her lips and licked them. Yum.
"Try not to chew your whole mouth off," Freddie joked. He didn't stop smiling even when Sam slapped him playfully on the shoulder.
"Just shut up and drive, will ya? We still have another four years before we reach the Canadian border."
Freddie chuckled. "Did you remember your passport this time?" He still remembered when they had gone on a tour of the fat cake factory and Sam had no way to get back in America.
Sam nodded mischievously. "Yep. I put it somewhere I can't lose it."
Freddie frowned. "Where?"
"You don't want to know."
They drove another fifteen minutes until the car started to slow down. They were out of gas! The car came to a stop in the middle of the road.
"Sam!" Freddie groaned and looked over at her. "What happened? I saw you fill up the tank!"
Sam shrugged like it wasn't a big deal. "I guess I forgot to close it."
"How are we supposed to get to Canada now? Or anywhere!"
"Hey, I'm not a…a car enthusiast!" Sam argued. "How was I supposed to know you had to close the stupid thing?"
"I don't know…maybe because it's obvious?"
"Your sarcasm wounds me, Freddie."
"You wound me all the time! In illegal ways!"
"Don't make me use the butter sock-"
"Calm down, guys!" Carly screamed suddenly. Freddie and Sam shut up and stared back at her. "Arguing won't help. Just go find a hotel to spend the night. It's almost midnight. Tomorrow we can find a car rental place. Okay?"
Sam and Freddie avoided looking at each other and mumbled in agreement. It was a good plan.
"We can't just leave the car here," Freddie pointed out. "My mom will murder me if I don't bring them back."
Carly sighed. "Fine. I'll sleep here with…Frothy…while you two go find a hotel. You can send someone to tow the car in the morning."
Freddie got out of the car, but Sam hesitated. "You won't let anything happen to Frothball, right?"
"Him"? Carly gasped, offended. "What about me? Your cat is probably going to try to do things to me while you're gone. Things that aren't innocent!"
"Oh, chill out, Carls. Frothy is just playing around. He likes you."
"A little too much," Carly grumbled. "Just go ahead. I'll see you in the morning. Don't forget to come back for me!"
Sam got out of the car and shrugged. "Eh. I'm not making any promises."
She and Freddie walked a mile before Sam complained she couldn't go on anymore. Freddie was tempted to leave her. When they finally reached a little motel on the side of the road, he still had no idea how Sam ended up riding piggyback on his back.
"Finally!" Sam collapsed on the bed as soon as they rode the elevator up to the eighth floor.
Freddie's eyes widened. "Uh…Sam?" He scanned the small room. They didn't have enough money to afford two separate rooms.
"Yeah?"
"There's only one bed."
A/N: This is now officially a multi-chapter fanfic!
Sorry there wasn't much Carly in this chapter, but you'll see more of her in the future (and other characters) And did you guys notice the floor number of the motel Freddie and Sam are staying at? Eight? Hmm…the seddie number…interesting…
