As Belle entered the shop locking the door behind her she inhaled a heavy breath and softly released as she mentally prepared herself to be back in the antique shop. With soft steps, avoiding the extra creaky wooden planks, she couldn't help but feel her heartstrings being fiddled with as with a weary heart she passed by all the antiques. It felt like it was just yesterday that she was on the opposite end of the counter trying to sell the locals of Storybook antiques. But alas, it had been over a month since she stepped foot in the shop.
Every antique, every relic and every inch of the shop was covered in stories. That was always her favorite part about working there, apart from seeing Rumple all the time. To the normal eye, her library had more stories but in reality, it was the antique shop although none were on page. While it was Rumple that procured the antiques, it was always Belle who tracked down the origins.
Her lips spread into a soft grin as her hands reached for an ornate porcelain hair comb. The value was priceless and for that reason it always failed to sell. It was always one of Belle's favorite antiques, aside from the first edition novels she had stored in a trunk.
"I should take those with me." Belle spoke to herself thinking about the books.
It felt strange passing the register for the last time. It was dusty and growing cobwebs from being abandoned. She could care less to tidy everything up, what she truly wanted was all evidence of her removed from the shop.
She reached for the large trunk with first edition novels and she huffed and blew hair out of her face as it proved to be heavier than she remembered. With a soft groan she lifted the trunk and waddled over towards the entrance creating a pile of things to pack and take with her.
As she turned her back the trunk of books slightly shifted on the ground, as she had placed it at an angle, and it bumped into the half shelf directly in front of it.
Thunk.
The trunk pounded against the shelf and instantly she turned eying all the merchandise rattle on the shelf. Just as she was about to exhale in relief she looked down and noticed on the very bottom shelf a small teacup was chipped and broken in two from the initial hit.
"No no no." Belle could feel the pain in her chest instantly. She dove to her knees and held the teacup in her two hands in a cradle like motion. Her hands cupped the broken porcelain so tightly she could feel a cut forming on her palms. But the pain was nothing compared to the pain she felt within. She couldn't help but cry releasing the hurt in her chest. Once that first tear broke free, the rest followed in an unbroken stream. Belle bent forward where she sat on the floor and began to cry with the force of a person vomiting on all fours.
Her tears turned into full blown sobs and not before long she could barely breath. There was a raw and tender pain inside her that felt as if an almost heeled wound had just been reopened wide.
It wasn't the actual broken teacup that brought her sadness, but more so what it represented. The teacup was once what she considered the greatest antiquein the entire shop. It used to bring a smile to her face every time she saw it and for the past month it had been nothing but an aching memory and now, well now that was broken. Shattered into bits…just like her marriage. That was what truly hurt, seeing the broken porcelain felt like one of those 'life imitates art'moments. Because her life was definitely shattering around her.
"I'm pathetic." Belle panted as she settled the broken teacup pieces on the shelf and began to wipe away her tears. "Who even are you?" Her bright blue eyes peered into a nearby mirror and she recoiled hating her reflection. She was a mess.
Where was the strong girl who gave herself to the evil Dark One to aid her kingdom, where was thatgirl when she needed her the most. Some days she was able to channel that girl and some days she was so weak like in that moment. There had been so much pain in her chest every time she remembered the final moments of her marriage. The memories burned into her skin carried more trauma than she ever cared to admit. No one really knew the truth but her and Rumple. Even then, at times she felt Rumple either forgot or pretends as if he did. Their relationship was always very private, but she never minded because she loved him. She loved him so much that she was blinded.
Get a hold of yourself, a voice inside of her shouted.
Her eyes glanced back at the pieces of the teacup and then back at the mirror again. She wasn't mad at herself for mourning her marriage or even for trusting Rumple, but for loosing herself in the process. She knew it was normal to miss something, but she despised that that thing she missed was all a perfect illusion. But, she in a strange way as her tears dried, she knew she would be ok. Afterall, happiness was a journey not a destination.
After wiping away her tears she decided to remind herself of the strong woman she could be by finally taking everything that belonged to her out of the shop. It was time and she knew it had to be done. She turned on the archaic record player in the shop that Henry had to teach her how to use. She smiled at the memory of Henry teaching her about popular American music and how enchanted she was with the sound of jazz.
The music soothed her soul and it truly felt like the perfect comfort in that moment. Suddenly as the songs trailed on, she forgot about her worries and only focused on packing.
The music was playing a little too loud to point that she did not even hear the door open. She screamed at the sight of someone and dropped the box she was holding on route to the front of the shop.
"Killian. It's late, what are you doing here." She asked seeing the pirate standing in front of her with a strange look on his face. "Are the fairies alright?" She felt slightly embarrassed that she was a mess. Her eyes were still puffy and swollen from all the crying.
Killian gave her and the shop a once over look and it strangely gave her chills. She couldn't put her finger on it, but he seemed different. He looked directly into her eyes in a strange possessive way, much unlike his genuine caring expression early. She shook the chills and tried removing any negativity from her mind.
"Yes. They are fine. Blue sends her love." Killian said not getting any closer to her. "However, I'm here for a different matter."
"Well what is it?"
"It's about Rumpelstiltskin's dagger. Do you still have it in your possession?"
Belle nodded quickly unsure what direction the conversation was going in. "What about it?"
"I fear the Dark One might return soon, so I think its best if I take the dagger and bury it in the ocean to hide it where he will never find it."
"What…You really think Rumple would come back?" Belle's heart stopped even thinking of that possibility. "But I banished him." She added the latter in a shock.
She could feel her hand start to tremble as it gripped the edge of the counter. She was barely holding on to her sanity and that comment from Killian was the absolute last thing she needed.
"You know him better than anyone else. He will stop at nothing to get back to you and his magic." Killian's face was still hidden by the darkness. She searched for his kind eyes and in turn she found absolutely nothing.
It took a few seconds as Belle wrestled with how to respond. But despite her intuition, she decided it was Killian after all. He knew what he was talking about. "I guess you're right. Let me go grab it." She shifted around the box she had dropped and headed to the safe she had installed in Rumple's old bedroom.
Killian took the blade with no other words and stepped out of the shop with a wave. She couldn't help but feel like something was wrong with him. She hoped more than anything something with Emma hadn't come up.
Shaking off the strange feeling Belle continued packing up her things and realized she definitely had more items in the shop that she had anticipated. There was absolutely no way she could lug all the items to her house.
Embarrassment swept through her face as she knew who she should call. With anxious fingers Belle dialed the number she knew by memory although she never called.
"Hey Dad. I'm at the shop, do you think you could swing by and pick me up." Her voice cracked and suddenly she was ten years old again missing her father.
"Sure thing, sweet pea." Maurice responded on the other line without a single question.
Just as Belle carried the last of her items to the sidewalk outside of the shop, her blue eyes lingered towards the brokenteacup. But- this time it wasn't broken? Had she imagined breaking it? Was she truly that unhinged? As her father's van came down the corner, she found herself once again shaking off the horrible feeling in her chest.
Maurice was there within seconds after she locked up the shop and helped Belle load everything into his van. Her heart was in knots as a bittersweet mixture of feelings tugged at her. She cried as she broke down to her father. But in lieu of his judgement, he brought her in for a warm embrace and simply told her everything would be alright. And in that moment, she truly believed it would.
During the next few days she went out of her way to ignore Killian. She felt guilty but in the same sense she couldn't wrap her head around how cold he had to been to her in the antique shop. It wasn't like him. Within hours he had turned on her. First, he was pulling her panties down at the library to get in her and then later that evening he leaves the shop without even saying goodbye? It didn't sit well with her. Plus, it didn't help that every time she saw him, she wanted to quite literally jump right on top of him, it was strange. It was something she had zero expertise in, and no book or manual could've ever prepared her for that. They were friends after all, but were friends supposed to want to ravish each other up any time they were alone? The answer she knew in her heart was no.
"Rise and shine pirate." Killian's eyes opened wide at the sound of a familiar voice. For many nights as he slept inebriated aboard his bed at the Jolly Roger, he dreamed Emma would wake him up and tell him that she changed her mind. But it had been a month since he had any kind of dreams about her. He was fine and happy and honestly a little shocked that she was even aboard the Jolly Roger. She hated his bloody ship, hell she even referred to it as a dumb boat.
"Emma. Nice surprise seeing you in here." His eyes widened as he realized Regina stood by the door waiting for him to wake up as well. "Your majesty." Killian added overall annoyed at their presence. His eyelids wanted to close but something about being watched waking up made him uncomfortable.
"You have five minutes to get dressed Hook, meet you upstairs." Regina said icily as she followed the blonde above deck. "And hurry." She shouted from the top of the stairs as Killian was still processing everything.
It was five in the morning and the air was ice cold. Killian was exhausted from having been up late drinking and playing pool at the pub with Robin and John, one of the many merry men who decided to stay in Storybrooke. Boy, they could handle their rum.
"What's so important you had to wake me up at the crack of dawn." Killian appeared above deck rubbing his eyes adjusting to the slight daylight that was rising.
"What happened to the Killian that was already up at this time ready to start his day." Emma teased with her arms crossed against her chest mainly for warmth but partly to appear intimidating.
"Let us just leave it at he had a little too much to drink last night and feels like death at this very moment." Killian stood in front of Emma and Regina as they stood by a wooden post with their back to the sea.
"More like you always have too much to drink." Emma spoke under her breathe but knew fully well Killian could hear her.
"Alright enough you two, I already regret being here. But we have business to discuss." Regina spoke loudly with a clear tone of irritation. "Rumpelstiltskin is back."
"Bloody hell, just when things in the town were finally stabilizing." Killian turned his back to them in anger looking out at the sea. He wanted to scream; the crocodile always had a way of getting back into his life. It was ironic because now unlike other times, Killian cared not for revenge but for a normal life. His mind wondered to think about Belle, and how she would handle it. Poor thing. He did not want to see her suffering at the hand of the crocodile, and he especially did not want to see what would happen when Rumpelstiltskin finds out Belle and Killian had a drunken one-night stand. "What does he want this time?" Killian asked visibly upset.
"Your guess is as good as ours." Emma answered.
"Then how do you guys even know he is here?"
"The barrier around the town that I set up after his exile has been taken down and he is the only person strong enough to disable it. So, that means he is here and somehow has regained his magic." Regina looked filled with disappointment. "If he somehow managed to get back his magic in the so-called land without magic and he chose to come to Storybrooke out of all places, then he has to be looking for something here…or maybe even someone?" Regina added as a later thought as she positioned her finger on her chin in thought.
"Belle." Killian spoke softly thinking of how horrified she would be if he appeared to her.
"I wouldn't be surprised if she already knows." Emma replied somberly, very much aware of the problematic relationship the beauty and the beast have had.
"There is no way she does." Killian spoke without truly thinking and in result Regina and Emma stared at him surprised. "She would have told us." Killian adjusted his words in a way that it did not seem like Belle and he were closer than they knew. He hated that he was there aboard his ship discussing strategies with them when all he wanted was to check up on Belle.
"I mean…you can't blame her if she didn't tell us. He is her husband." Regina said in matter of fact tone. Her and Killian had this relationship where they respected each other but at the very same time desired to rarely hold a conversation with each other.
"But what if she truly is unaware." Killian played the devil's advocate.
"I guess there is only one way to find out." With the words said Emma was on the move and gestured for everyone to follow her.
"Why do you even insist." Regina began annoyed before she whirled her finger engulfing them in smoke.
Belle looked relaxed sitting behind the counter at her desk as she sorted through the books like she did every single day. Her face was bare without a drop of makeup exposing every freckle and sun spot on her tanned face. Her long brown hair was tied back in a braid with a blue ribbon per usual, but she added some flowers in it this morning. He could not help but wonder if she got them from her father Maurice's flower shop, if so, it meant they were on good terms. The smile on her face gave Killian hope that she hadn't heard the news yet. Jazz music played on a record player that rested on one of the wooden tables directly across from her desk. The music was probably the reason she didn't realize Killian Emma and Regina now stood directly in the middle of her library watching her unsure of how to grab her attention as she worked and sang along to the melody. Regina waved her hand towards the vinyl player and the music reached a screeching halt.
"Regina?" Belle looked over the counter in shock. "What a surprise." She added with a monotone attitude. Her facial expression showed clear distrust in the Evil Queen, er reformed Queen.
"We need to talk." Regina approached Belle, Killian and Emma followed her footsteps.
They all gathered around the wooden table with tension in the air. Nobody necessarily liked each other but they all were required to sit down and discuss exactly what they were going to do. Regina decided to break the news at once without further delay. She was rash like that straight to the point.
"He's what?" Belle stuttered unable to absorb the information that Regina shoved down her throat. Her eyes looked in disbelief towards Killian who could at this point barely make eye contact with her. He felt horrible for having an audience watch her mentally breakdown at the news that her abusive ex-husband was back in town. The facial expression she displayed when Regina broke the news to her was all the proof, they needed to know that she was in no way involved with his return. Belle was devastated, he could tell. Killian wanted to tell her himself, but he knew Emma and Regina would question it and Killian wasn't one for giving up details.
"It would be nice if we could have his dagger Belle, do you mind giving it to us." Emma tried to be gentle with Belle, but she also knew time was of the essence. "We need to stop this fight before it even begins."
"Well I don't have it." Belle's watery eyes flicked towards Killian.
"Then who has it?" Regina asked irritated.
"Killian…You came to the antique shop the night after we encrypted the spell to release the fairies. You asked me for it."
"No. I haven't seen that cursed blade since you commanded the crocodile to leave the FIRST time." Killian raised his hand to his temple trying to control his anger. His head was hot and he wanted to break something. Not one inch of him liked the direction the conversation was heading in.
"But but you said you were going to put it somewhere…where no one would ever find it." Belle answered sure of herself.
"You really think after I spend a life time of searching for a way to kill the Dark One I wouldn't remember holding his precious blade. I'm pretty certain I'd remember holding that dagger in my hand." Killian was speaking through his teeth. The pirate in him was showing.
"No." Belle stood up from her wooden chair examining the room in shock.
He did not even have to answer to reveal the truth. Everyone in the room felt it, "Yeh well I don't bloody have it." He was angry. How could Belle be so naïve to think Killian would even ask for it. She wanted so desperately to see the good in everyone that now the Dark One is back in town and now he was in full control. If he managed to practically crush Killian's heart still with Belle in control of the dagger, he could only imagine what he would do to him without her control. Killian in his rage banged on the wooden table and got up unable to even look at anyone in the face. He was a dead man walking.
"It was Rumple. Wasn't it." Belle's faced drop in realization. All her emotions were sinking in. "He tricked me…again." The latter portion of her statement seemed to be her true breaking point. Her voice cracked and the tears pooled in her eyes. She couldn't hold them back for much longer.
"Don't worry I won't let him hurt you." Emma put her hand on Belle's shoulder but was only responded with her stiffness.
"Banishment was too good for that demon we should have driven that dagger through his heart when we had the chance." Killian picked up a chair and threw it across the library in rage. He wasn't even thinking rationally. He wanted Rumpelstiltskin dead. Belle has tears in her eyes at this point and she couldn't stop apologizing.
"Killian get a grip on yourself. If you kill the Dark One with his dagger, then YOU become the Dark One." Emma shouted but Killian could care less. He tuned out the blondes protests and instead focused on his pure hatred for the man who he had spent 300 years hunting.
"But a small price to pay for the death of the crocodile." Killian exhaled trying to get a grip of himself. His blood was boiling with anger. Why did Belle have to be so trusting?
"Relax Hook, I will deal with him. Just…take care of Belle right now. She is the one in the most danger." Regina gave Killian no chance to respond. She wasn't having his tantrum one bit. She stood up and signaled for Emma to follow and then they were gone leaving the two in silence.
"I'm sorry Killian." Belle began to sob.
Her expression was that of pure betrayal. There was no way she could falsify her emotions. Sure, Killian hated the man but Belle…hell she had loved him. Truly truly loved the man. She was hurt the most by his actions, not Killian. She was the one who deserved to be throwing a tantrum, not him.
Upon seeing her breakdown Killian remembered her mood just a few minutes prior, she was finally starting to be happy. She was singing and swaying to the music, and he just took that away from her. Like it was nothing. He loathed himself.
"No no Belle. I am the one that should be sorry. That was stupid of me to get that upset. I feel like a real wanker." Killian began to walk over to the chair he threw moments prior to pick it up. Belle's sobs slowed down and she whipped her tears away ashamed.
"It's not your fault. I would be mad too. He's taken a lot from you Killian and I know that. And now him pretending to be you to trick me, that's horrible." She sighed watching him pace back and forth in a nervous frenzy.
"Don't do that luv, you're the one who has gone through his torment more than anymore. Don't put my feelings and needs before yours. I was not thinking properly." Killian sat down in front of her and gently brushed his finger against her cheek to wipe away her stray tears. She smiled at his touch.
It was a friendly touch that she appreciated. He could tell she desperately needed a friend.
"Thank you. I know you didn't have much of a choice, but I appreciate you being here. I've been trying so hard to feel ok but sometimes it seems impossible especially when he's constantly reentering my life." Her smile was contagious. Killian couldn't even remember why he was so upset.
"I mean since we're already here did you want some help putting some books away." Killian's removed his hand from her face quickly, slightly embarrassed that he forgot he was even whipping her tear away.
"That would be nice." Belle stood up to the rows of boxes with labels on them. The library looked a lot less messy than the last time he was there. It had only been four days and she had single handily put away more than half of what she had on the floor. "You can start on this shelf with the romantics, they're already in order starting with Austen then Bronte."
"Oh believe me I know my romantics." Killian muttered under his breath as he observed the box.
"I am sure whatever you consider romantics are not romantics at all." Belle teased over the sound of books being put away on the shelf.
"Don't be so sure of that luv, I'll have you know I'm a natural born romantic." He cocked a brow at her and she blushed naturally.
"Oh yeah, says who?"
"I do recall someone saying I was the perfect lover many many times in ecstasy." Killian couldn't help but toss her a smoldering look. He liked to make her blush; it was too easy.
"Hey! We agreed to never talk about that." She snapped throwing an empty box at him in good humor.
"Why no we absolutely did not. We agreed to be friends and never do that again. That. Is. All." He knew he was right, and he knew she realized it. The apples of her cheeks were flushed as she began to laugh.
Not that we listened, Belle couldn't help but think to herself.
"You're too full of yourself Killian."
"Call me captain." He teased.
"oh gods no." She rolled her eyes.
The rest of the day was tiring but for a moment they forgot that Storybrooke was being invaded by Rumple and his minions. When word got out Zelena was back along with the crocodile Killian was shocked but not surprised, of course they were working together. However, Killian quickly noted how Belle's expression dropped when he informed her after receiving a text message from Emma. She didn't note on the sadness that filled her and Killian would never pry, but it was very much present within her. Rumpelstiltskin was still nowhere to be found but according to Emma and Regina they had something in the works to catch him.
"I'll walk you home" Killian commented grabbing her canvas tote bag from her that looked like it was really digging into her shoulder. "You're going to lose an arm if you keep carrying bags this heavy."
"I'm used to it Killian; I don't mind it. It's what happens when I can't decide which book I want to read next so I end up buying 20." She shrugged locking up the library doors behind her. 'Give it back." She extended her hand to grab the bag.
"I believe I was given the instruction to protect you today. So in order to fulfil my duty, I am going to protect you from this very dangerously heavy bag." He joked as they began to walk ahead letting the cold weather blow through them.
When they arrived to the gate at Belle's house, they both directed their attention to her icy front porch steps. There was a bouquet of red roses with a note attached to them. Upon seeing them Belle panicked and rushed to check the note as Killian felt dread filling inside him.
"What if they're from Rumple." Belle quickly kneeled to snatch the note almost knocking over the display. "Oh- they're not." She said upon reading the text. Haven't seen you in a while, hope I haven't ruined any chances of taking you out again.
"Who is it from." Killian asked not wanting to pry.
"Will. Again" She smiled now grabbing the arrangement off the ground
"If you don't mind me asking, do you see potential for things getting serious." Killian asked afraid of being invasive. His eyes adverting hers like a school boy. "Do you see a future with him?"
"I don't know." She answered honestly. "Even the thought of having a relationship with someone it's so weird."
"I can understand that." Killian walked closer to her trying to usher her into her home before the snowy winds froze them both.
"Especially now that Rumple has come back, I don't know if I should even see a future with anyone. It wouldn't be fair to them." She looked lost in thought as she searched her jacket pocked for the keys to her home.
"You deserve to be happy, who cares about the Dark One."
"I care." She spoke softly. "I care what he would do to him to get back at me."
"I suppose that's true." He couldn't help but admire her strength. She was the kindest person he had ever met and her putting her love life on hold confirmed it. Her ability to put herself second always amazed him. "I just don't think it's fair that you deprive yourself of a normal life." He added struggling with his words. He wanted to tell her she deserved the world.
"Romance isn't everything. I can live without it. If I can live in a castle for years on end with no visitors, then I can live this life perfectly fine alone." She had been through so much, but she remained so positive, it racked his brain.
"Aye, you're right on that." He watched as she entered her home and set the vase down on her table. Killian followed inside to set her canvas bag down somewhere.
"Well I'll leave you now. Let me know if you need anything I'll be around." Killian called out as Belle bid him farewell.
Once he arrived at the Jolly Roger and lay in bed Killian couldn't seem to get Belle off of his mind. He couldn't help but stop worrying about her. It amazed him how fragile and small she was but how strong not only physically but as a person she was. He admired her for all she's been through and how she never let it get to her. She truly was one of a kind. He had just taken off his plain white blouse and his vest as he heard a knock at his cabin door. He figured it was probably Emma or Regina wanting to talk about what happened, but instead as he opened the door, he was surprised to see a beautiful brunette smiling at him.
"Oh Belle, did not expect you here." Killian invited her in.
"I can't sleep." She appeared defeated. "I close my eyes and I just imagine Rumple appearing and taking me away from all of this. This town is my home. And I know he would make me his prisoner and take me away without remorse in the blink of an eye." Her eyes were glazing with tears. Her tone was desperate.
"Belle. Slow down." Killian put his hand on her shoulder trying to get her to take some deep breaths. She took his hand gesture as an invitation and pressed her head against his chest. "I won't let him take you." Killian ran his hands through her hair as they embraced. Her body was ice cold.
"That's the thing. He's the Dark One, no one can stop him." She pulled away from Killian. He had never seen her this unraveled. She looked genuinely scared.
"You don't even know if he wants to hurt you." Yethe almost added but kept that part within him.
"Then why else would he team up with Zelena, she almost killed Baelfire. Rumple wouldn't just forgive her out of the kindness of his heart. Something is up."
"And we will get to the bottom of it, but right now there is nothing we can do until he reveals himself."
"You're right." She sat at the edge of his bed thinking to herself. "Can I sleep here?" She asked in the softest voice.
"Of course, Belle. You take the bed and I'll sleep on the couch over here."
"No. That's not what I meant." She kicked off her shoes and looked him straight in the eye.
"I want to sleep together. I want to be held." Killian walked closer to her as he held her gaze.
It was an innocent request truly but given the history between them two it could've been taken out of context. Easy. But the two were so in sync with one another that Killian picked up on exactly what she needed. Belle wanted a friend. That alone.
"Yes." He brought his hand to her cheek and brushed against her still freezing skin. She smiled at his warmth, "But I'll have you know I sleep in the nude." Belle burst into laughter at his statement. She roared with genuine laughter as she removed her oversized trench coat and scarf. She had only her silk night slip on.
"I've seen everything pirate, you don't scare me." She grinned and made herself comfortable on the bed. Killian kicked off his boots and began to maneuver himself on the bed.
"Well I don't bite." Belle laughed as Killian tried his best to keep his distance from her. The bed was small but it was big enough for them to sleep side by side without physically bumping each other. "Put your arms around me. I need your body heat if I'm ever going to be warm on this ship." Killian abided her wishes but something inside of him was feeling reluctant to hold her too close. He was embarrassed he would get an erection or anything in general to make her feel uncomfortable. He wanted nothing more than for her to feel as if she was in a safe zone with someone she trusted.
"Goodnight Belle." He murmured and he leaned down and spoke against her lips. His hot breath fanned over her lips and her eyes widened as his lips brushed against hers in a near-kiss
"Goodnight Killian." Belle smiled and nuzzles her head against his chest as he brought her in closer.
