Chapter 3

Summary: Haley is out of surgery and what really happened in the school.

The morning after the school shooting, Nathan was in Haley's hospital room. Nathan dozed off, nearly falling off his chair. He looked at Haley who was still unconscious. The site of her lying there broke his heart. When he first entered the room, he almost didn't want to walk in, seeing how badly injured she looked. Now hours later she still hadn't woken up. The doctors said it would take time and that she would be okay but that still didn't make him feel better. As Haley's husband, he was allowed to stay in the room with her, the others waited in the waiting room. No one wanted to leave until they knew Haley was okay.

He couldn't deal with the people outside, it was already hard enough to be with Lucas. Everywhere he went and everywhere he turned, they were talking about Haley. She was a hero afterall. She talked to Jimmy, tried to calm him down and see reason. She succeeded but she still got hurt. She was able to calm down a guy with a death wish, someone who was out to kill himself and others. But he hadn't let her calm him down. At that moment, Nathan felt worse than Jimmy for Haley was able to get to him.

Despite what Lucas told him, he was still being hard on himself. She could've died thinking that he didn't care for her. He kept thinking of all those times that Haley had reached out to him and how he kept pulling her away. The night she came home, she came to his room and tried to plead for his forgiveness. He should've let her stay with him that night. Or during High Flyers, when he received her letters but never replied back. Or how he ignored her at school or brush her off when she tried to talk to him.

He was hurt pretty bad when she left him. He had given her his heart and she walked out on it. It was the first time his heart got broken and it was just easier to stay mad at Haley than to deal with it. Now she was paying for his mistake. Was it only yesterday that she came to home, wanting nothing more than to cook him breakfast? Breakfast, that was it and he still pushed her away. If he hadn't push her away, she would've arrived to school later, she wouldn't have been in the building when the shots were fired. She wouldn't be here lying unconscious.

Nathan took her hand and placed it on his, kissed her forehead. He held her and prayed that everything would work out. He nearly lost her, the love of his life. The thoughts kept repeating in his head. The thought was so disgusting that it made his stomach turn. More than that he was mad at himself. Whatever walls he built around his heart got torn down with one gunshot.

"Haley, please wake up. I need you to wake up. I know I've been a jerk lately and I promise you that it ends now. You just need to wake up, if not for me then your friends. They're all waiting for you to come back to us Hales.. please.. if you can hear me.. just squeeze my hand, just move one of your perfect fingers and let me know that you're still with us."

He waited a moment but felt nothing. He closed his eyes, tears coming down his face. But then he felt Haley's hand twitch and he immediately turned his attention back to her. Her eyes starting fluttering and then they were open. Nathan's face lighted up and as he felt a huge weight off his shoulders. He kissed her forehead again.

"Thank God.. you're awake." Nathan said relieved.

"Nathan?" she said softly, almost not speaking. She looked confused and looked around the room and saw where she was. "Water.." was the next thing she said. Nathan immediately got up and went towards the corner and poured her a glass of water and put the cup up to her as she took a sip.

Her memory coming back to her, she turned to Nathan. "Jimmy?" Nathan shook his head, realizing that she did watch him kill himself.

"The doctors said that you're going to be okay Haley.. don't you worry… we're all here for you."

The "we" part stung at Haley's heart when she heard that.

"Lucas." She said, "Is he here?" She said softly.

Nathan was brought back down to reality. Of course she wanted to see Lucas, he was there for her when he wasn't. He had always been there her whole life. He nodded and smiled politely, hiding the pain he felt. He got up and headed out the door to get Lucas and the doctors.

--

A short time later, Haley was fully awake. The doctor came in first and checked her out. After checking her vitals and running some test, he told Nathan that she was doing much better. Lucas came in after the doctor was done. Nathan watched from the doorway as her face lit up when she saw him and reaching out to give him a hug. He couldn't watch any more. He walked away from the door, giving them the privacy they needed. He was jealous. Lucas can make her feel happy, all he was able to do was give her pain and heart ache.

The rest of the gang eventually went to see her. Nathan watched from the sidelines as everyone showered Haley with love and affection. He couldn't help but be jealous at all of them. Haley paid him no mind, as if he wasn't in the room, but he couldn't be mad. He did after all deserve this. He thought back to when he crashed Cooper's car. He called Haley to tell her not to come. This was the pain she felt that night. To know that the person you loved almost died and to be turned away. He didn't deserve her. He was mad at Haley, angry and wanted her to feel as bad as he did. Now, he realized that he accomplished that and much worse.

Feeling suffocated, he got out of the room and stared out into the hallway. A nurse came in a few minutes later to tell everyone that Haley needed her rest. Nathan looked back in the room as Haley smiled and said bye to everyone. Nathan said his goodbyes to them too as they made their way out. Lucas was the last to leave and turned to Nathan. The two looked at each other, but both knew what the other was thinking. Lucas tapped Nathan's shoulder, as if saying "Hold on there" or "it's going to be okay," but Nathan wasn't so sure.

Nathan of course could stay and after Lucas started to walk away, he went back in the room. The smile across Haley's face was visibly gone.

"I'm glad you're feeling better." He said walking inside, trying to sound composed.

"Thanks." She said, turning away from him, looking away at any distraction she could see in the room. "You can go." She said. "You must be tired." She added.

"I'm okay." Nathan replied back.

"I'm fine.. plus I told my parents I'd call them back and I need my rest." Nathan knew she wanted him out of there. He didn't blame her. He nodded in agreement. "I'll.. I'll be outside if you need me."

"Need me." Those words echoed in Haley's head after Nathan left. Of course she needed him, she had always. But now she wasn't so sure. She thought back to the school shooting and how scared she was when Jimmy held them hostage.

Flashback

Haley was in the back of the tutor center along with Rachel, Mouth and a couple of other students. She watched as Mouth tried to plead with Jimmy, but he wasn't budging. She looked at the faces around her, lined with fear and pain. She thought of Nathan and wondered what he must be going through. "Did he even know I was here with Jimmy? Does he even care?" A part of her wanted to believe that he did care but his recent actions proved otherwise.

She convinced herself that he stopped caring a long time ago and that made her sad and angry at the same time. Her family was gone, her parents are out on the road and lord knows where the hell they were. Her siblings were all grown up and had families of their own to take care of. Her only family was Nathan and he left her. She had good friends of course, but she still felt alone in this world. She looked to Jimmy and saw the same pain in his eyes that she also carried.

She knew Jimmy, he would be with Mouth when they watched Lucas and them play ball at the river court. She couldn't believe what he was doing, but then again she could relate to his pain. The world had turned on him and he felt like there was no where else to go, no where else to turn but to the barrel of a gun.

"Jimmy." Haley said as she stepped forward.

"Get back!" He yelled at her.

"You have to let these people go."

"I said stay back!"

"I know what you're going through."

"YOU have no idea what I'm going through… you of all people."

"What about me?" She asked a little annoyed. She didn't care if he had a gun.

"You're just as bad as the rest of them.. you were my friend.. in the rivercourt until Lucas joined the team and now you two are just like them… Mrs. SCOTT."

"You like to think that because I'm married to one of the most popular guys in school makes my life rosey and peachy. The truth is Jimmy, it's not .. far from it." She walked closer to him, lowering her voice so that the others wouldn't hear her.

"You want to know something.. Nathan hates me.. I left to go on tour for 2 months and he still hasn't forgiven me.. I don't think he ever will .. this is the man I love.. the man I want to spend the rest of my life with.. the one I gave ALL of myself to and he doesn't want me… I have friends yes.. but they don't know what I'm going through.. to feel as if you are all alone in this world.. so tell me Jimmy, what part of you don't I understand.."

"…"

"Our situations are different and I'm not out to play who has it worse, but the truth is we all hurt.. even the popular ones.."

"I just want them to stop Haley.. I just want everything to end .. but I can't.. I can't now.. not after this."

"Look Jimmy, no one's been hurt.. this is a f situation but you can still fix this.. let them go.. I'll stay with you Jimmy… just let them go.."

"No.. I won't let them go!" He yelled.

At this point, Haley didn't care what happened to her next. She may not have Nathan anymore but at least she could do something right with her life. She can save her friends and classmates behind her. She moved closer, not caring what he would do to her. He was just as scared as the rest of them, maybe even more.

"Yes, you will Jimmy.. because deep down .. you're a good guy.. a good guy who's had bad things happen to you.. just like me.. just like everyone else.. no one deserves to have bad things happen to them Jimmy.. you can end it.. just let them go."

He pointed the gun at her, his hand shakey. She turned to her classmates behind her and signaled them to go. They were unsure at first but they eventually started moving out and towards the door. Mouth and Rachel were one of the last ones to leave.

"Haley.." Rachel called out, the gun still pointed to her face.

"Go on you guys.. it's going to be okay.. Jimmy won't hurt me." Haley said as she slowly walked backwards towards the door, where Rachel and Mouth were waiting for her.

At this point, Jimmy had tears streaming down his eyes.

"I just want it to end.. I just want it to end." He kept repeating. "I'm sorry.. I'm so sorry for everything." He pointed the gun to himself and fired.

"No!!" She screamed as she moved forward to him, but as she did the gun fell on the floor and fired another shot.

--

The next day, Haley woke up with her shoulder very sore. It hurt and the doctor gave her some morphine to deal with the pain. It was too bad that it couldn't help the other pain she was feeling. Thoughts of Jimmy and what happened replayed in her head. She saw a few visitors but she wasn't up for it. She told the nurses that she didn't want to see anyone, including Nathan.

Nathan went back home, unsure of what to do next. He spent the rest of the day pacing, trying to think of a way to get through to Haley. He came back the next morning, bringing with him flowers. He went straight to her room, but when he got there, it was empty, with Lucas standing over an empty bed.

"Luke.. what's going on? Where's Haley?"

He turned to look at him, unsure of how his brother would react.

"I'm sorry, Nate.. she's gone."

To Be Continued..

Note: I was planning on posting this later in the week, but hey it's Christmas, so to all those waiting for this chapter this one was for you. This was supposed to be a oneshot, that turned out to be too long so I broke it apart but even now it has gotten longer but oh well. I hope you enjoyed and please review.