DISCLAIMER: Don't own it, but am content that way. Most of the time.

Temperance Brennan turned the two very complicated locks on her apartment door, glad to be home. It had been a tough day, and all she wanted was-she stopped.

Stared in astonishment at the sight that greeted her.

"Hi, honey-"

"-Hey Bones."

Her father. And Booth. Both trying to greet her at the same time, both glaring at each other. Both stretched to their full heights, trying to appear taller.

She had two alpha males in her kitchen. If she believed in karma she'd swear it was trying to tell her something about her cosmic balance points.

And her current habit of buying locks that criminals and Rangers could get open.

"What are you both doing here?"

"Well, you see-"

"We came to the conclusion-"

They stopped. Glared at each other, then Booth made an impatient- well go ahead gesture.

"Agent Booth and I recently came to the conclusion that we've both been negligent in our duties towards you."

"More like, I figured you were being a crap father and pulled you up on it, but hey, whatever." Booth muttered, a spot on her ceiling seeming to hold his rapt attention.

Her father didn't blink.

"Agent Booth thought you might like to join us both for dinner."

She was still stuck on "Agent Booth and I." Dinner, she'd try to get her head around in a minute. Her early estimates indicated she wasn't going to be all that successful at it.

"You didn't answer my question. What are you both doing here?"

She turned to her partner, pointing accusingly at him.

"Why aren't you arresting him?"

She swung around to her father, trying to ignore that jolt of heart-deep recognition that went through her every time she looked at him.

"And you! Why aren't you running away from him?"

Her Dad glared at Booth as he coughed, the sound suspiciously like a chuckle, but met her stare, speaking carefully.
"Honey, I don't run-"

"-It kind of seems like running." Booth put in.

Her Dad just raised a brow. Booth seemed to wilt a little.

"It seems like running to your daughter. Sir."

Her Dad turned back to her.

"Agent Booth and I have come to an agreement. You eat with us, he doesn't arrest me. You walk out right now…" He let it hang, giving her an unconvincing look of sorrow.

"Booth will arrest you." She finished for him, glaring at Booth, who was trying his best not to look smug.
"So you two cooked this up to guilt me into staying for dinner? You figured I wouldn't let my father go to jail, that I'd sit down and have a nice meal with you guys, like this isn't the strangest gathering of people in all of human history?"

"Well, no." Booth put in.

She raised a brow at him, waiting for the explanation involving emotions and heartfelt reasoning.

The one she'd eventually, after a lot of arguing, have to agree with, simply because she wasn't able to understand it fully, and she trusted Booth to be right.

"There was that time you invited Cullen to dinner with the squints. That was pretty freaky."

She glared at him.

Her Dad looked interested. "Cullen, FBI Cullen?"

"Yeah, and Bones and her squints. It was like watching a misdirected kick in soccer- you know it's going to be bad, but you just can't look away, you know?"

Her Dad nodded, relaxing back on the couch. Her couch. "You follow soccer?"

Okay. She was going to put a stop to this, before they started braiding each other's hair.

"Hold it!" She yelled, putting up both palms in a cease and desist gesture, interrupting Booth's reply.

"You guys are not friends."

They both looked confused. She sighed. She was going to install the mother of all locks in the morning. Or move to Alaska.

"You are my estranged father, and you are the man who has sworn to arrest him. You guys cannot be friends, and chummy, and all…nice."

This was not good. She preferred very solid ground under her feet- this was outside the realm of her experience and she sure as hell wanted it to stay that way.

She was going to have some kind of nervous collapse, she was sure of it.

Just as soon as she'd finished beating the hell out of Booth for setting this ridiculous façade up.

Booth glanced at her father. He nodded, and stood up.

"I'm just going to use your bathroom."

She nodded.

"You can't get out the window. You'll have to come back, and Booth will arrest you."

Her Dad just waved a hand as he left the room, acknowledging the comment.
She looked at Booth. He was smirking at her.

"I realise how lame that sounded."

"Lame. No. Pathetic and sad? Maybe just a little, there, Bones."

She glared at him. "This is all your fault. I really did not want to have to deal with this. You are forcing me to make decisions I'm not ready for."

He held up his hands.

"Whoa, Bones, it's just dinner. Hold off on finding the line for two hours, okay? Stay in the grey area, have some dinner, y'know? Maybe some dessert."

She frowned at him.

"I have no idea what you just said to me."

He sighed.

"Be a daughter, just for tonight. And tomorrow, you and your Dad can go back to being awkward strangers, and I'll go back to being the officer sworn to arrest your father."

"Why?"

He met her gaze steadily, then shrugged, giving her a half smile. "Maybe we'll all come out of this with some kind of understanding. Maybe not. But at least you can say you shared a meal with your Dad."

She sighed, glancing towards the pointed sounds of the bathroom door handle being rattled.

She looked back at Booth, his eyes asking her to do this.

She saw understanding there, in the depths of his gaze, and caring, and so she nodded, giving permission for them to stay.

Her Dad came out, glancing at Booth, then giving her an undefinable look.

She glanced away, straightened her shoulders, and raised a brow at Booth.

"So. You mentioned dessert?"

Author's Note- Stay tuned for the meal. In two parts because haven't decided on what they're eating. My main food groups are pasta and grilled cheese sandwiches, so I'm going to try to make it a bit more upmarket. Thanks all reader and reviewers, and have a fantastic week!