A/N: This is dedicated to my best friend, who's always been there for me, but I've been a terrible friend. I want her to know that I know that I was awful, that no matter how much I want to go back and stop myself from saying that to her, nonetheless, damage has been done, still, I want to fix this, before I lose something important to me again, especially since this time I can actually do something to help it… Sarah, I know I don't deserve it, but I hope you'll read this and know that I'll always love you, even if you start hating me…
Let Her Go- Passenger
The feeble light flickered out, one spark-soaked last time, announcing the official retirement of that short lived light bulb. A husk of a figure was dimly seen, through the almost-pitch-darkness of the small room. His usually fierce blood red eyes were clouded and dull, giving him a more so faded look. His face was gaunt and there were dark circles under his eyes, giving him a look that screamed, "I'm a murderous panda, don't even think about screwing with me!"
He needed the light. The darkness was sinking into his bones, not that he wasn't, most days, but today, today was different. He was alone. She wasn't with him anymore. And it was he, who had let her go…
And how cliche was t to say that his love for her had finally decided to show it's sorry ass as the days dragged on by, now causing heartache and regret. He let out an undignified snort, roughly pulling his fingers through his hair, wincing as they were snagged by quickly forming knots. How had he been so stupid, to give her up so easily, after fighting so long to even get her to notice him. Romantically. Well, for him, it was just a stupid dare, at first. He'd always been attracted to her, even when his stubborn heart was in denial and refused to give, until it was forced to give in, cracking as he realized the love he had for her.
The betrayal in her honey brown eyes, as his accusations and the truth were revealed to the sweet and simple girl, had pierced his heart of ice. Underneath the fiery shell he'd erected around himself, what was left of his frozen heart had crumbled away, into a heap of nothing but dust, except with one clear answer: He truly loves her. But now, it was too late. Everything he touches surely dies…
He barked out a sudden, mirthless laugh. Now it seems as if he utilizes his teacher's Alice even better than that cold-blooded assassin does. He's barely reached the threshold of his love, when karma comes around and bites him in the ass. He'd deceived a girl who was falling slowly, but surely, in love him. Then sha-bam, the world comes crashing down around his ears, and the threshold of love, for him, all but vanishes, into thin air.
Down-in-the-dumps couldn't describe even a fraction of how he was feeling. He never knew that he could've even felt above everyone else, because she was by his side, and not anyone else's, but now he's lost her. Down-so-far-the-Earth-was-a-speck-in-the-distance. described it more accurately. He gingerly picked himself up, and staggered to the door, nursing his one Hell of a hangover, and cursed himself for enjoying the staring contest between him and the bottoms of all those glasses. He shoved his shoulder against the door, willing it to give in, without him having to the doorknob, or course. Ultimately, he just gave up turned the thrice-damned knob.
The bright fluorescent light outside the custodian's closet flooded his eyes with a blinding pain, similar to that of having one of your visual organs to close to a supernova. His lifeless red eyes were now squinted, further accentuating the panda rings around them. The ground was rolling. Or was it? Before he could decide, he'd ended up in a face-to-face encounter with the reasonably clean floors of the prestigious Gakuen Alice.
Where the students are above all others (some quite literally so), and the who the world depends on, from some things to everything. Even if, no, especially if, it required the disposal of a human being, or something dangerous that those pampered petit-fours couldn't hire anyone else to do.
Even with his mind clouded over, with enough vodka to dissolve the liver of a whale, he was cynical as ever. Who could blame him? He was the favorite guinea pig of the dangerous class. Scratch that. the vodka was causing his mind to wander into dangerous subjects. He shook his head in an effort to clear some of the fog, but in the end, he only managed to transform his killer headache, into a skull-crushing migraine.
He burst out of the double doors, standing still and revelled in the cold air that had brought telltale signs of a blizzard. He was starting to miss the sun. The memories flooded back into his head, causing him to stare up into the cloudy skies, crimson orbs stinging with tears.
Would she listen?
Would she care?
There's only one way to find out.
But don't ever forget: You only know you love her when you let her go.
And you let her go
Usagi: I know it's choppy and hops around, but anyone with a vodka hangover should be glad to even be able to stand up… let alone think straight… (Or you're up at 3 in the morning, trying desperately to finish typing this story.)
Anywho, hope you enjoyed it. Plus, I highly recommend listening to the song while reading this.
Let me know what you think! X3
