CHAPTER 3

Fifth year…

Again, he couldn't go live with Sirius. Even more now with Voldemort back. And the summer was worse than before because his friends hadn't written him about anything, neither have Sirius or Remus. They sent letter, at least once a week except for Remus which was every other day. But their letters were vague, they stayed away from any news in the wizarding world. He felt left out.

Harry was making his way back to the Dursleys when he ran into Dudley. 'Wonder what little kid he and his gang recently tried to torment.'

Of course, Dudley being Dudley, he tried to start something. Harry just stood there and listened to his taunts but held up his hand when he felt their surroundings go still. They looked around and Harry cursed when he felt the temperature drop about thirty degrees in two seconds, ice start to cover all surfaces and their breath start to fog.

"Harry?" Dudley whispered and Harry has never heard him sound so scared and that's saying something when he almost wet himself when Hagrid came to get him from that shack they stayed in to get away from the letters from Hogwarts.

"Dudley, you have to run." Dudley didn't move. He was frozen still when the two floating forms of Dementors was seen. "Run!"

They took off running but weren't fast enough. They collapsed as the Dementors came upon them and Harry turned to see one sucking at Dudley. He needed to do something. Coming up with a happy memory - the first time he saw Remus on the train - he pointed his wand and cried, "Expecto Patronum!" A large Patronus burst from the tip of his wand, pushing the Dementors away, and Harry immediately crawled to Dudley.

"Dudley." His cousin just laid there shaking. Standing up, he helped Dudley stand and started heading to the Dursleys, running into Mrs. Figg on the way.

He pushed the door open and carried Dudley to the living room where his aunt and uncle were. "Dudley!" Aunt Petunia cried and jumped up to come to them. Harry walked him to the couch and pushed him down.

"Do we have chocolate?" Harry asked trying to catch his breath a bit. He may be fit from Quidditch but he hadn't eaten much this summer since he hadn't "earned" it. Not to mention his cousin was quite large.

"Boy!" Vernon yelled and grabbed him, spinning him around to face him. "What did you do to my son boy?"

"I saved him so you should be thanking me. Now I know you of all people have chocolate so where is some?" Vernon's face turned all kinds of shades but Harry ignored him and turned to his aunt because she would do anything for her son, even listen to the "freak's" advice. He softened his voice. "He needs chocolate. It'll help."

She nodded. "There's some in the back of the top shelf in the cabinet on the right of the sink." Nodding, he went into the kitchen to get it but stopped when he found a letter on the table waiting for him. Frowning, he read it and felt his breath hitch as he read how he's been expelled for using magic outside of school. Feeling numb, he stuffed it in his pocket and went to get the chocolate for his cousin. Getting it, he turned back around and found another letter, stating that he wasn't expelled but was going to get a trial.

He stuffed it in his pocket with the other letter and walked back to the living room. He shook Dudley awake and waved the chocolate in his face when he just stared up at the ceiling blankly. "Come on Dudley. You need to eat the chocolate. It'll make you feel better. Trust me, I know."

His cousin looked at him before slowly taking the chocolate and eating it. It may be the first time he's ever seen Dudley eat something slowly.

"What happened?" Petunia asked as she watched her son.

"Dementors," he simply said.

He watched his aunt frown. "I remember my sister saying something about them. But she said that they guarded the wizarding prison. What were they doing here?"

'That's a good question. What were they doing here?' Harry shook his head. "I don't know."

He knew they weren't going to ask anymore questions at the moment since they were focused on Dudley so he slipped out of the room and went to his room, reading the letters over. He was happy that he was at least getting a trial to defend himself but he knew it had something to do with him being Harry Potter and most likely Dumbledore. What he was upset about though was what happened to other students who has to use magic and gets expelled for it without a trial to defend themselves. The Ministry really needed to work on that law.


A few hours later Harry heard the doorbell and his uncle answer it. Harry knew he was to not make his presence known just in case it was someone from the neighborhood. Everyone in the neighborhood thought he was a troubled kid, thanks to his relatives, so he was to stay away from them.

"Boy! Get down here!"

Frowning, he exited his room and headed downstairs to see the real Moody, Tonks, and Shacklebolt at the door. "Yes?"

"We're here to take you to Black's home for the rest of the summer, Potter," Moody said and Harry found it fascinating to see that the real Moody wasn't that different from the fake one. The only difference was that the real Moody was a bit more paranoid. "Go pack your things."

Not about to argue with that, he ran back upstairs and quickly packed his things and grabbed his more personal things that he kept hidden in the floorboard under his bed. Packing those also, he dragged his trunk behind him and headed out. "Wait!"

Harry turned to see his aunt make her way down the hall and towards him. He froze when she hugged him. "Thank you," she whispered before pulling back and patting his shoulder before going back to the kitchen.

A bit dazed and confused, he turned around; ignoring the look his uncle was giving him, and left. He and the three Aurors walked a bit. "That was weird," he muttered while shaking his head. He turned to Moody. "So how are we getting there?"

"Flying."

"Hell yes," he whispered. He hasn't flown a broom in over a year and he needed to feel the adrenaline of flying. He pulled his Firebolt out of his trunk quickly and let Moody send his trunk to wherever they were headed.

"Now Potter," Moody said while Tonks and Shacklebolt just kept looking around, staying alert. "Stay in formation and we won't have problems. If anything happens, you stay with me. Got it?"

Harry nodded. "Got it."

He mounted the broom and waited for them to get going. His heart was raising and he felt giddy as he waited. He couldn't wait.

"Let's go."

He took off into the air and had to remind himself not to go at the full speed so that they others could keep up. He couldn't wait until he got to school so he could get to the Quidditch Pitch and do a few full laps at top speed.

They flew through the air, the wind plowing in his face, the scenery just flying by. He's missed this. Too soon for his taste they reached a street and landed in front of a row of houses. He looked around and Kingsley passed him a piece of paper. "Read this."

Number 12 Grimmauld Place

As soon as he read the piece of paper it burst into flames and a house started to push itself between the others. "Whoa," he whispered as the house finished pushing forward and a bright red door was his greeting.

"Let's go Potter."

They entered into the house and Harry was surprised at how dark and gloomy it was. It was the total opposite of Sirius. Harry started looking around as the others left.

"FILTH! GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! CONSORTING WITH MUDBLOODS AND BLOOD TRAITORS! HO-"

Harry jumped at the sound of the portrait's screams. "Shut it hag," Moody grumbled as he closed the curtains over her.

Harry just shook off whatever the hell just happened and after instructions to head upstairs by Mrs. Weasley, started walking upstairs. It was rather disgusting. Dust, cobwebs, and elf heads everywhere. 'How did Sirius live here?' he asked himself. 'How can anyone?' He walked around until he went to the room Mrs. Weasley instructed. Slowly opening the door, he suddenly had a missile the shape of his best friend Hermione launched at him.

"Harry!"

"Hermione," he gasped as the air got knocked out of him.

"Geez Hermione," his other best friend Ron said from further in the room. "Let him breathe."

"Sorry," she said as she started to let him go. "We heard about the Dementor attack," she said.

He nodded. "I'm not even going to ask how when it was only a few hours ago." He walked further into the room to look around. "How long have you been here?" he asked.

"We got here just a few hours ago actually," Ron said as he sat on one of the beds. "Dumbledore came to tell us what happened and collected us so that the same didn't happen to us."

Harry nodded.

"We also heard about the hearing. I read up about it, they just can't expel you," Hermione said.

"Yeah," he mumbled as he thought about how unfair it was. He was happy that he got a trial, no doubt about it, but he only got one because of who he was. What happened to those who had to use magic in an emergency like him? They got expelled without defending themselves, at least if they were muggleborn or halfblood. "So…what is this place?"

"Headquarters," Ron said.

When Harry looked at him to continue, Hermione picked up. "For the Order of the Phoenix. It's a secret society. Dumbledore found it back when they first fought You-Know-Who."

Suddenly feeling upset over how his summer went, he turned to them. "You couldn't put this in a letter I suppose?" At the look they passed, he felt his anger rise. "You went a whole summer without a scrap of news. Why?"

"We wanted to write you. Really we did," Ron said and looked highly uncomfortable as he stuffed his hands in his pockets.

"Dumbledore made us swear not to tell you." Hermione didn't seem to like it.

"Dumbledore?" he asked. "Why didn't he want you to tell me? Why keep me in the dark? Maybe I could help. I mean," he humorlessly laughed, "I'm the one who saw Voldemort come back. I'm the one who fought him."

Suddenly two pops of apparition came from behind him but he barely jumped. Ever since the incident at the graveyard he's had a way of knowing who someone is and if they're dangerous without even seeing them. It was quite odd but he didn't really question it since it helped him stop himself from attacking friends when they decide to sneak up on him.

"Well hello Mr. Potter," the twins said together.

"Hello," he said back and smiled back at them.

Fred smiled. "Fancy seeing you here-"

"-almost expected you to be half dead," George finished.

Harry snorted.

"Anyway, if you're all done shouting," George said and Fred finished.

"Would you like to hear something a little more interesting?"

A minute later they were all gathered at the railing and Fred was lowering an extendable ear on a string while George held the other.

"If anyone has a right to know then its Harry," they heard Sirius say.

George messed with the ear before finally letting them all hear it.

Mrs. Weasley protested, "But he's not an adult either. He's not James Sirius."

"He's not your son."

"He's as good as. Who else has he got?"

'Remus,' Harry mentally supplied, and said a quick hello to Ginny when she joined them.

Sirius quickly said, "He's got me."

"How touching, a paternal black. Maybe Potter will grow up to be a felon. Just like his godfather."

"Stay out of this Snivellus."

Harry, Hermione, and Ron knew about Sirius being a spy, and that he had to act a certain way to not raise suspicion. What Harry was wondering was if what was just said was his spy role, or just his normal self. After all, even though he had to act like a git, he still was one sometimes. He had a quick tongue and wicked mind and personality. But even with that, he still trusted the man with his life, still trusted him to be there if anything happened to him and his friends like he's been there since first year.

"Snape's in the Order?" he asked.

Ron smirked. "Git."

"Meow."

They all looked down while George quickly pointed at Fred to pull the ear up. "Crookshanks," Hermione hissed, "leave it alone."

Ron was muttering, "Stupid cat." He and Crookshanks still hated each other. Harry watched as the ginger cat pulled and yanked on the ear until finally snapping it off and walking away with it in his mouth. Ron looked to Hermione. "Hermione, I hate your cat."

Hermione sighed before calling, "Bad Crookshanks."

Harry snorted but covered it with a cough at Hermione, Fred, and George's look. "Sorry," he muttered while patting his chest, "bad cough." He smiled innocently when Hermione's lips twitched. "I'm going to go down for Sirius."

"Kay." "Sure," they said before they went back into the room.

He headed back downstairs and waited as the door opened and the people from the meeting left the room. Most people just nodded at him while others wished him luck on his hearing. 'How the hell does everyone know about my hearing?'

But he didn't dwell on that.

"Harry Potter."

He turned and saw Sirius in the doorway with Remus standing a bit behind him, leaning against the doorframe and Mr. and Mrs. Weasley. "Sirius," he said and came to give him a huge hug. Sirius chuckled in his ear as he wrapped his arms around him in return before he rocked them. After a while Sirius released him and held him away to look at him.

"You're looking good Harry."

"Thank you," he said smiling and his eyes moved to the man behind him. "Hello Remus," he said, his eyes locked onto those two amber orbs.

Remus smiled in return and Harry was quite glad Sirius still had his hands on his upper arms or he would have melted onto the floor in a pile of goo. "Hello Harry." Merlin, that smooth velvety sound. Dangerous. Dangerous man.

Harry, still staring into Remus' eyes, moved from Sirius to Remus, wrapping his arms around his neck. He felt Remus' arms come around his waist and they held onto each other. Remus rocked them just as Sirius had down before but Harry was more focused on the skin that was in front of him. Remus neck was bare, it was just right there. He couldn't stop himself from leaning forward and inhaling the man's woodsy, musky scent, his lips just barely brushing against the skin. He felt Remus' arms tighten around him even more.

Reluctantly, they let go of each other. "How are you Harry?" he asked.

"Besides almost having my soul sucked out of me a few hours ago, I'm fine."

'Now that I'm with you,' he added silently.

"Well," Mr. Weasley said breaking into the silence, Remus and Harry still staring at one another, "why don't we start dinner Molly?"

"Oh, of course. We'll be eating in the kitchen," she said. "Children! Come down for dinner!" Suddenly the pops of apparition could be heard and her shout of surprise. "Just because you can use magic does not mean you have to whip out your wands for everything!"

Harry chuckled as he watched Molly chase Fred and George into the kitchen before turning back to Remus to see him smiling. He locked his knees to make sure he didn't collapse. "You okay Harry?" Remus asked with a frown.

He absently nodded before, without thinking, he grabbed Remus' hand. They both inwardly jumped at the shock that went through them as their hands touched, but kept their faces blank of what they just felt. Harry instead led them to the kitchen where everyone was gathering before reluctantly letting go of his hand and sitting down beside Sirius while Remus sat across from him, on the other side of Sirius.


Remus ran his fingers over the hand that Harry had held earlier. He could still feel the younger man's warm hand in his; could still feel that shock that went through him. It had made his heart race and gave him a nice little buzz to his head. Making him feel a bit like he had been drinking some Firewhisky. Not to mention how his blood had started racing when he had held Harry in his arms and heard Harry lowly take a deep breath. Almost as if he was smelling him. But it was the way he had felt the brush of Harry's lips against his neck. He could still feel that patch of skin tingling from the almost nonexistent touch of Harry's lips. He felt like what he was feeling was important but for the life of him couldn't figure out why. So he stored it away for later.

Harry's certainly grown from the last time he had seen him. He had grown a bit taller, broader in the shoulders a bit but slimmer. His most noticeable change was his face though. Not only was his hair cut from the mop of hair he had before, but his face had matured. There were more angles and no baby fat. It got Remus' arousal going just looking at him. What he wouldn't do to see Harry's new body.

"We think Voldemort is building up his army again," Sirius said and Remus turned his attention back to the discussion. "He's been recruiting heavily."

"And not just witches and wizards," Remus added. "Dementors, Giants, Werewolves," he softly added. "All manners of dark creatures."

"We've been trying to do the same," Sirius continued.

"Trying?" Harry asked.

"The last time Voldemort gained power, he almost destroyed everything we hold dear," Remus said and he saw out of the corner of his eye Sirius look away and lower his head for a few seconds before lifting it. He knew his dear friend was thinking about how abruptly their pack had been destroyed. All gone and destroyed in one night. Thankfully, the three left have found each other and were together again. "Fear makes people do things, but it also makes them not. Many people are willing to let others fight while they stand aside."

'Like how the wizarding world stands aside and lets you fight and deal with Voldemort.'

He and Moony silently growled at the silent words.

Sirius looked at Harry and Remus didn't like that look. "But gathering followers isn't all he's interested in."

His heart raced as fear started to enter him. Moony wasn't happy as well.

Moody cleared his throat from behind Sirius but his long time friend ignored him and continued. "We believe Voldemort may be after something."

"Sirius," Moody said and Remus could only just watch the happenings. He was frozen. He wanted to tell Sirius to shut the hell up but his mouth was momentarily not connecting with his brain.

"Something he didn't have last time."

Remus watched Harry glance at him and he could see his brain working. "You mean like a weapon?" he asked.

Sirius opened his mouth but luckily Molly cut him off. "No! Absolutely not." Remus' head fell down in relief. "He's just a boy. You tell him and you might as well induct him into the Order."

"Good! I want to join!" Harry said and Remus' head snapped up to look at him. "If Voldemort's building an army then I want to fight."

Remus looked at Harry and then at Sirius who leaned back with his hands gesturing to Harry that clearly meant, "See. He wants to know and join." And then he winked at Harry.

What the hell was Sirius thinking? Encouraging Harry to join. And what the hell was Harry thinking?


Later that night, Harry couldn't sleep. His dreams…he didn't want them. Ron's snores weren't helping, and neither was the heat.

Getting up, he headed downstairs to the kitchen to get a glass of water and to just give him something to do. He headed down and almost went into the kitchen but paused when he looked off down the hallway to his side and saw a light coming from under a door. Deciding to see who else was up, he went to the door and peaked into what was a library and Remus was sitting on one of the couches in front of the fireplace, which wasn't lit since it was summer, reading a book.

"Remus?"

He watched Remus jump and look up to see him. "Harry, what are you doing up?"

"I could ask you the same thing," he said as he walked into the room, looking around, before he sat down beside Remus.

"Couldn't sleep so I figured I'd read a bit," Remus said as he closed the book and set it aside. "Now what are you doing up?"

"Couldn't sleep either." Harry turned to lean back into the corner of the couch so he could comfortably sit and face Remus. He gave a small smile when Remus raised an eyebrow in question. "A lot on my mind."

"Want to talk about it?"

"Just what was discussed at dinner." 'And about you,' he silently added.

He was surprised when Remus suddenly looked pissed off and…at him. "Remus?" he whispered as he reached for him but he leaned back from Harry, folding his arms. He tried not to be hurt by Remus' refusal of his touch but he couldn't stop it. It really hurt. More than he thought. It must have shown because Remus relaxed again and grabbed his hand, but still looked pissed. "What's wrong?"

"You are Harry. You are only fifteen, yet you're talking about joining the Order and fighting Voldemort."

Harry frowned. "Of course I am. You didn't think I'd sit by and not fight did you?"

"Yes."

Harry snatched his hand up and stood up. "How can you think I'd want to sit by and do nothing?" he asked glaring.

Remus just glared back. "I knew you wouldn't want to, but I expect it."

"Excuse me?" he asked shocked. "You expect it?"

"Yes," he simply said.

Harry opened and closed his mouth a few times but he couldn't find any words to say. He was so shocked that Remus thought that he could command Harry to do anything. Most of all something like fighting. He said the first thing that came to mind. "Fuck you!"

He watched Remus' eyes turn golden before back to amber and back again. His eyes flickered back and forth so fast until they just stayed mixed together. Remus softly growled and stood up. "Excuse me?"

"You heard me! Fuck! You! Who do you think you are telling me you expect me to just sit by?"

"I'm someone who cares for you safety!"

"I don't need someone protecting me!"

"I beg to differ!"

Harry felt like ripping his hair out. 'Ugh! The man is infuriating!'

"I'm fighting Remus."

"Over my dead body, cub," he growled.

Harry almost took a step back from Remus – or was it Moony he was talking to? – but he didn't because he knew no matter what, Remus nor Moony would ever hurt him. "Then where would you like to be buried?" he asked with a smirk.

"Watch it cub," he growled so low Harry almost didn't hear him. "You're not joining. You're too young."

"I'm not too young for Voldemort to come after me," he snapped back.

"Merlin Harry," he growled as he began to pace. Harry's never seen the man so upset before. "Do you really think Dumbledore's going to let you join in the first place? Not only are you too young, you are Harry Potter!"

"Then he'll make an exception won't he?"

Remus growled so loud this time Harry did step back. "You are so goddamn stubborn!" Harry didn't say anything because Remus continued. "He's the head of the Order and there is no way he'd make an exception for even you Harry! He's not going to put you in even more danger than you already are! And even if he did think it was a good idea, I won't let him."

"There you go again," he said. "I'm fighting if I join the Order or not Remus. Get that through that thick skull of yours."

He started for the door but when he was a few steps away he felt a hand grab him and turn him around. "No you're not!"

"I've told you before Remus, danger finds me! I even told you about all my previous years! Why do you even care so much?" he asked.

Harry immediately regretted asking the question at Remus' face. He looked so shocked and hurt, like he had been slapped. "How can you even ask me that?" Remus asked. "You're the cub of what's left of my pack and I'm not going to let anything happen to you."

"You can't guarantee that," he said as he stepped up to Remus. He was touched that Remus cared so much about him but he was infuriated that he thought he could control him. Even worse was how Remus was almost promising that he was going to make sure Harry never was put in danger which they both knew would happen. There was no way Remus could stop it and Harry didn't want him promising anything that he couldn't keep. "I have been fighting since I was eleven. I've fought Voldemort more times than I care to count and once is more than I wanted. The bastard has been after me since I was one. He's going to keep coming after me until he or I are dead! What makes you think you can protect me? Huh? Answer me that Moony!"

He had been getting closer and closer to Remus as he ranted and his glare never weakened. Neither did Remus'.

"I will!" he screamed.

Harry punched his chest but they both didn't acknowledge the fact that it was really weak. "Don't say that! Don't make promises like that when it'll only be broken!"

They stared at each other. Their chests were rising up and down quickly as they panted, their breath brushing the other's face. Their eyes were locked; Remus' a mixture of his own and Moony's while Harry's Avada Kedavra green eyes seemed to glow. Harry's green eyes flicked to Remus' lips on their own accord and Remus' didn't miss it. He growled and Harry was suddenly crushed in Remus' arms as his lips crushed down on his. Harry quickly wrapped his arms around Remus' neck and felt himself getting backed up until his back hit the door.

Remus didn't waste any time to push his tongue past Harry's lips and Harry didn't stop him. He opened his mouth for Remus and sucked on his tongue, feeling Remus' growl vibrate against his chest when Harry bit his bottom lip.

The kiss was nothing like he had imagined their first kiss to be. It was angry, brutal in a way, desperate like they never wanted to let go of each other, and passionate. But it wasn't any less delicious than he imagined. Remus' scent and taste assaulted him like nothing before and he couldn't get enough.

Without warning, Remus pulled away, breathing heavy, though he weakly chuckled when Harry whined. He tried to pull Remus back to him, but Remus only rested his forehead against his. "Harry," he whispered.

Harry whimpered, he wanted Remus' lips back on his. "Remus."

"Harry," he sighed, "we have to stop."

He pouted, and was not ashamed of it. He really wanted Remus' lips. "Why?"

Remus chuckled and pressed a swift kiss to Harry's lips before pulling back. "We have to. You're only fifteen."

"So."

His smile was strained before leading them back to the couch. "Harry, you're young. I just want you to be sure of what you want."

Harry pouted again, and was sad that Remus stopped, but he understood. He was young. He also knew what Remus wasn't saying. Remus wanted him to be sure that Remus was what Harry wanted, and Harry was sure. He's known since his third year. However, he didn't think Remus would believe him. So he just nodded.

"Remus?"

"Yes."

"I know you don't want it to happen, but I will fight. It's inevitable."

Remus sighed and pulled Harry into his side, his arms around him. "I know," he said and ran his fingers through Harry's hair.

"So you can't promise that nothing will happen to me." When Remus didn't say anything Harry went on. "Just be there for me like you've been."

"I promise," he whispered into Harry's ear and Harry smiled before falling asleep against Remus, inhaling his scent.


Sirius was shocked. Well, he wasn't really sure if that covered how he felt.

He had been sleeping when he snapped awake at a noise from the hallway. Sirius used to sleep like the dead in his teens, but twelve years in Azkaban and two years on the run knocked that out of him. He always was alert, especially when he had been on the run; waking up at any sound so that he was ready to make a run for it if the noise was from something that was dangerous to him. Getting up to check it out, he cracked open the door to see Harry heading downstairs.

Wanting to make sure Harry was alright, he headed back to his room to put on a pair of sweats - he slept in the nude and didn't want to frighten his godson by showing up naked - and then headed downstairs. He entered the kitchen to find it empty and wondered where Harry was until he heard voices coming from the library. Cracking the door open a bit when he reached it, he saw Harry and Remus sitting on the couch, facing each other. They looked relaxed and enjoying talking to each other until Remus' posture became hard while Harry looked nervous.

He watched Remus relax a bit but still look angry and quickly caught onto what the conversation was about. Remus didn't want Harry fighting and Harry did. Well didn't want to but had to. Sirius agreed with Remus about the whole thing but he also knew there was no stopping his godson and that no matter what the fights would find Harry somehow. So he figured it'd be better for him to join the Order and learn to fight better so he was more prepared to fight and defend himself whenever the time came.

"Fuck you!"

Harry's yell cut into his thoughts and he was shocked and became nervous as he watched Remus and Moony battle for dominance until they became one. He knew he should probably step in and stop them, but he knew Remus and Moony would never hurt Harry. Plus, they needed to fight this out or it would be left unspoken and leave a huge hole between them until one day they just ended up fighting again.

He listened to them go back and forth before Harry started walking away and Remus turn him back around. Harry may not see it, but from where Sirius was, he could see the fear in Remus' eyes as Harry talked about Voldemort being after him since he was one and asking how Remus planned to protect him. Remus was scared for Harry but angry at the same time.

Sirius had thought about Remus' feelings for Harry since he discovered them but always brushed it aside as just a fancy. But seeing Remus' emotions like he was, he didn't think it was. His feelings for Harry were strong, even Sirius could see that and he wasn't the most observant of people.

Then…they kissed.

Remus. Kissed. Harry.

'What the fuck!'

The door snapped shut on his face when Remus backed Harry to the door and with his hearing heightened a little because of his animagus form, he could hear they were going at it hot and heavy in there.

For a while he was frozen in shock, but he snapped out of it when he heard Remus say Harry's name and how they had to stop.

A few seconds later he was finally able to move and he cracked open the door to see Remus and Harry on the couch, snuggled together. He watched them for a few seconds after they both fell asleep before he dimmed the lights and closed the door again.

He really needed to think.


The days passed like nothing happened. Harry and Remus talked like they normal did and no one was the wiser about what had happened in the library. Of course they had no idea about Sirius. The days passed with them doing as they wished before they went to bed where everything was different. After everyone was asleep, they would meet in the library together. They didn't have a repeat of that night though. There was no fighting, no desperate kissing which meant no coming together. They talked; discussing whatever came to them like past experiences, school, and even sometimes the war. There were times where they just sat and enjoyed each other's company in silence. And every time they went back to bed they separated with a hug.

Harry's dreams became frequent, he was almost afraid to go to sleep. His emotions were all over the place some days, going from one extreme to the other. He felt angry all the time. But he never told anyone about them.

His hearing came and went uneventfully. He was let go and not expelled from Hogwarts on the fact that he had used his magic in self defense. There were of course some people judging that thought he was lying - this toad of a woman who wore bright pink - but after Dumbledore suggested he show his memory that shut them up. Especially after they saw how close Harry and his cousin had come to getting their soul completely sucked out of them.

There was a special dinner that night to celebrate the fact that Harry wasn't expelled but it was also just a way to get everyone's spirits up since it had slowly lowered with the war going on.

School came too fast in Harry's opinion and Harry and Remus were almost inseparable. During the day they discussed Defense and History. It was actually fascinating to talk about it since it wasn't about goblins. Remus even shared his secret with Harry about how he's been writing History and Defense books under a famous penname. Of course, Sirius joined them during most of the day since Harry also wanted to get closer to his godfather. Their nights continued in mostly comfortable silence and them in each other's arms.

"Harry?"

"Yeah?"

"You all packed?" Hermione asked from the doorway.

"…Yeah," he sighed.

"Harry? What's wrong?" she asked as she came into the room to sit beside him.

"Just don't want to leave is all," he said, resting his head on her shoulder when she wrapped an arm around him.

He's always thought of Hermione as a sister, just as she thought of him as a brother. They both grew with no siblings, no friends, no one to talk to. Sure Hermione had her parents but talking with them was different from talking to a sibling. So when they became friends it had quickly morphed into a brother/sister relationship. She turned to him and he turned to her. It was so simple for them. Sometimes Ron didn't understand their relationship and how they could be so close without being into each other - even though he knew Harry was gay - but that was because he grew up with six siblings. He didn't understand what it was like to grow up alone and finally finding someone you could trust with everything you are and have.

"Is that all?" she asked as she ran her hand through his hair.

"…"

"Harry?"

"I just don't want to leave. Sirius and…Remus are here."

"Ah."

He raised his head to look at her. "What does that mean?"

She smiled and shrugged. "Nothing."

"Hermione."

"Nothing," she said grinning.

"That's it!" He pounced on her, held her down, and tickled her.

"Harry!" she yelled before she went into uncontrollable laughter. "S-Stop!"

"Nope!" He continued tickling her, making her laugh.

But suddenly, she flipped them over and started attacking him. "No," he squirmed but found Hermione stronger than he remembered. "No!" Her fingers attacked him and he started laughing, trying to fight her.


Remus walked upstairs to see what was taking Hermione and Harry so long when he heard the sound of loud laughter, and, "Do you give?" followed by, "Never!"

Wondering what the hell they were doing, he made his way to the door leading to Harry and Ron's bedroom, and cracked open the door to see Harry straddling Hermione and tickling her without mercy.

He leaned against the doorway and watched them with a smile as it's the first time he's seen this side of them. Oh, he noticed their sibling kind of relationship all the way back in their third year, but to actually see them like this, carefree and having fun, was refreshing.

"Remus!"

He jerked at his name suddenly being called and grunted when a male teen suddenly barreled into him.

"Sheesh, you'd think you hadn't seen him in a year," Hermione said but Remus saw her smirking as Harry clung to him.

"Remus, protect me from the evil Hermione."

"And what has the evil Hermione done?"

"She was planning to tickle me to death."

"Hey! You started it," she sniped back while crossing her arms. "It's only fair. If I go, you go with me."

"Remus, save me."

Chuckling, he wrapped Harry in his arms and slung him over his shoulder. "Do not fear my dear Harry, I will protect you from the evil tickling Hermione."

He smiled at Hermione before turning around and carrying Harry downstairs, Harry laughing and calling him his savior. Remus just about tripped when he felt Harry's hand smooth over his back and rest on his lower back, very close to his arse. The temptation to rub his own hand over Harry's arse that was right there for him to grab was strong, but he fought it.

They passed the kitchen where some people were hanging out and they paused to look on in surprise before they continued on to the sitting room where Sirius was.

Sirius looked up and smiled. "Had to drag him out?"

"No, I saved him from the evil tickling Hermione."

He heard Harry groan behind him and smirked as he realized what he did. He just gave Sirius some information that wouldn't be safe in his hands. And it was proven as a mischievous look came to his eyes.

"Really?" he drawled.

"Yes," Remus said as Harry said, "No."

Remus set Harry down as he was sure the shoulder in his stomach was getting a little uncomfortable.

Harry stared at him smiling as he slowly slid down Remus' body and finally touched the ground. The light and happiness in his eyes was beautiful and Remus found himself smiling back.

Then Harry blurted out, "I don't want to go."

Both Sirius and Remus frowned at Harry. "What?"

"I don't want to leave."

"Oh Harry," Remus sighed as he could see Harry's reluctance to head back to Hogwarts again. The school may be a home away from home, or the only place Harry considered home, but it was also a place that constantly put him in danger. "It'll be fine."

"You don't know that," he mumbled as he leaned against Remus' chest.

"He's got you there Moony," Sirius said and patted the cushion beside him for them to sit. "As long as you stay out of trouble. It shouldn't be too much."

Remus and Harry both looked at Sirius as if he had lost a few marbles. "Sirius," Remus said, "it's Harry."

"…True."

"Just try to stay out of trouble," Remus corrected.

"I can do that." He got a thoughtful look looking back and forth between them. "If you two do something for me."

"Oh, a compromise Moony. What are your demands oh godson of mine?"

"You," he pointed to Sirius, "get this house fixed up. Don't let this house suck the life out of you after you finally got your freedom back."

Sirius looked surprised with the request before slowly nodding. Remus smiled as he too had wanted Sirius to fix the house.

Harry then turned to Remus. "Two things."

"Yes?"

"One, you help Sirius with the house when you can."

"Done." He would love nothing more than to help Sirius turn this place around. "Second?"

"Second, you fix yourself up."

Frozen, he glanced at Sirius to see him beaming, before looking back to Harry. "What?"

"You are a werewolf. Have you ever read a book on them?"

"Yes?"

"And did you never wonder why you look nothing like a werewolf? Moony looks like a starving, bolding wolfman in pain."

"He's right," Sirius added.

"What am I supposed to do?"

"Accept Moony, he's not so bad if he didn't shred me to pieces that night on the full moon. He had the perfect opportunity to when I bared my neck to him, and he didn't."

Moony snarled in rage inside him at the thought of harming their cub. 'Never!'

"You won't be in so much pain if you just accepted him. Just…try it, please." He grabbed Remus' hand and Remus looked down at their linked hands before looking back to Harry.

He couldn't deny Harry when he looked at him with such hope. "Okay."

The smile that lit Harry's face made it easier with the decision he made.


Harry immediately knew it was going to be a bad year. That toad bitch from his trial was there, sitting at the head table next to Snape and McGonagall. After Dumbledore introduced her, she interrupted him. "Ahem."

Dumbledore paused and all eyes shifted to the bright pink woman as no one interrupted the headmaster during his welcoming speech. Even Snape was looking at her as if she was stupid. The woman slowly stood up and walked around the table.

Harry leaned closer to Hermione who was beside him. "She was at my hearing, one of the ones who didn't believe me. She works for Fudge."

Hermione turned back to look at the woman and Harry could tell by her face that she immediately didn't trust the woman. Neither did Ron who had heard Harry as he sat on the other side of Hermione.

"Thank you, headmaster, for those kind words of welcome. And how lovely to see all your bright, happy faces smiling up at me." Harry glanced around to see that no one was smiling at her. "I'm sure we're all going to be very good friends." She paused before continuing. "The Ministry of Magic has always considered the education of young witches and wizards to be of vital importance. Although each headmaster has brought something new to this historic school," she nodded to Dumbledore who nodded back, "progress for the sake of progress must be discouraged. Let us preserve what must be preserved, perfect what can be perfected, and prune practices that ought to be…prohibited."

She giggled.

Harry looked at Hermione and Ron and they were looking back at him with the same expression. "Is she mad?"

Applause was low though there at Dumbledore's encouragement as he thanked her for her illuminated words.

"What does it mean?" Harry asked as Dumbledore continued with his speech.

Hermione answered, "It means the Ministry is interfering at Hogwarts."


Harry made it to the common room and felt eyes. They were everywhere. He finally looked and saw people watching him. He stopped at the bottom of the stairs and turned to face the room, looking at two of his roommates. "Dean. Seamus. Good holiday?"

Dean nodded. "Yeah. Better than Seamus' anyway."

Seamus slammed his book down and stood up. "Me Mum didn't want me to come back to Hogwarts this year."

"Why not?"

"Oh, let me see. Because of you. This war is starting and it all started the night you and Cedric went to the graveyard."

"And what?" he asked as he felt his anger begin to rise, his magic brimming the surface. "You think I just stood there and watched? Or better yet, that I helped him come back?"

"Well you were the only one there Harry," Seamus said. "Why didn't you do anything? Because of you I've lost a few family members."

"I'd like to see what you do as a fourth year when a grown wizard ties you to a tombstone and draws your blood, perform a ritual, and watch Voldemort rise from a cauldron Seamus. Tell me, what you would do as you're surrounded by a circle of Death Eaters laughing at you as Voldemort puts you under the Cruciatus over and over again." He didn't notice how a few objects began to rattle. "I want to know Seamus. You tell me what you'd do as a single fourth year against twenty or thirty grown wizards and a Dark Lord. Tell me!"

"Harry!"

He blinked at his name being cried and looked at Hermione who was standing in front of him, looking at him worried. His magic dimmed but his anger was still boiling.

"What's going on?" Ron asked as he stood behind Hermione, standing between them and the rest of the Gryffindors.

Seamus pointed around the two and at Harry. "He's the cause of this war starting. He hasn't done anything to stop it."

"What have you done Seamus?" Ron demanded. "What have any of you done?"

He needed to get away. Harry ran up the stairs, and to his room. Ron followed, but he just needed air. He tried to get his tie off.

"You all right?"

"Fine," he said as he untied his tie and unbuttoned the first few of his shirt. The cloak had to come off. He felt trapped.

He ripped off the robe and threw it on his bed as Ron continued talking. "Seamus was bang out of order, mate. But he'll come through, you'll see."

"I said I'm fine, Ron," he snapped.

Ron looked at him. "Right. I'll just leave you to your thoughts, then."

Harry watched him go and sat on his bed once Ron was gone. He could still feel the anger, it was just waiting to rise and spill over.

'What's happening to me?'


Harry barely made it through Defense. Umbridge gave them beginner's books, something a first year, or younger, student would use. They weren't using magic in her class. It was like she was denying that a war was going on. She believed that children shouldn't need to learn defense as there were Aurors to protect them. And when Harry kindly pointed out that Aurors couldn't always get there on time, that they get there at least during the middle of the fight, what were they supposed to do then.

"That's what adults are for."

He had to bite his tongue so hard he could taste blood. Harry promised he would try to stay out of trouble, and his gut told him that if he uttered one more question—like "And if the adults die or aren't there?" then he would have gotten into trouble.

And he wasn't going to break his promise made to Sirius and Remus.


Dear Padfoot and Moony,

Hope both of you are alright and that everything's going well. Its cold here, winter is coming. I'm here in Hogwarts, with my friends, and I've never felt more lost, more alone.

I don't know what to do.

HP


Weeks went by and the loneliness increased. But it wasn't anyone's fault but his own. He didn't trust himself to be around people, he didn't trust this anger that seemed to always be waiting to erupt. No letters came back to him, no matter how many he sent. Seamus and a few other people who've lost family members and friends over the summer or getting letters about recent deaths were looking at him as if to say he was deliberately not doing anything.

What did they expect of his! He was only fifteen and in school.

"I think that's how he wants you to feel."

Harry looked to Luna as they watched and walked with the Thestrals. "Who?"

"He-Who-Must-Not-Be-Named. If I were him, I'd want you to feel alone, because all by yourself, you're not much of a threat."

And like that, he felt something shift in him. The anger was still there, but the shift was as if he'd been in the dark for months and finally he could see a light.

Harry walked in the Great Hall after leaving Luna and approached Hermione and Ron. He felt as if he hadn't spoken to them in a long time.

"Harry," Hermione said once she noticed him.

"Can I join you?"

She and Ron glanced at each other before nodding and were about to smile when there was a commotion in the hallway.

"Pardon me, professor, but what exactly are you insinuating?"

They all walked out to see Umbridge and McGonagall. "I am merely requesting that when it comes to my students you conform to the prescribed disciplinary practices."

"So silly of me, but it sounds as if you're questioning my authority in my own classroom," she took a step up to be level with McGonagall, "Minerva."

McGonagall took up a step too. "Not at all, Dolores, merely your medieval methods."

"I…am sorry dear. But to question my practices is to question the Ministry, and by extension the minister himself. I am a tolerant woman, but the one thing I will not stand for is disloyalty."

"Disloyalty."

Harry scoffed as McGonagall was the most loyal woman, besides Hermione, that he's ever met.

Umbridge took another step up before addressing the students present. "Things at Hogwarts are far worse than I feared. Cornelius will want to take immediate action."

'How can this year get any worse?'

Hermione had an idea.


Remus read the papers as the weeks and months went by. He, Moony, and Sirius were not happy. They didn't trust the Ministry interfering in Hogwarts, not to mention that they haven't gotten a single letter from Harry. They tried sending some, but they always came back unanswered.

They were keeping Harry's promise, hoping he was doing the same. The house has changed a lot since the summer, even Kreacher seemed a bit happier. The first thing that went was Sirius' mother's portrait. They hadn't destroyed it, though they wanted to. They actually set it up in the attic where they moved Kreacher's room so that he could continue to talk to her. After that, Kreacher lightened up and stopped his muttering about, even started helping fix the house. Elf heads were gone, cobwebs were dusted, a few walls had been ripped out and rebuilt along with repainted.

Remus started accepting Moony and though having the wolf talking to him, he was doing much better. He's gained weight, healthy weight and muscles, even grew a few inches and felt healthier. Full moons weren't hard, though he still came out with scars, but few. And after reading more correct werewolf books, he's learned a few things.

One for instance was the fact that Harry…was his chosen mate. From the moment he laid eyes back on his cub on the train back in his third year. He still tried to not think about it like that, made him feel extremely dirty and perverted. However, Moony helped him understand that when they first laid eyes on him, it was mostly just protecting their cub that they haven't been able to watch over the past thirteen years. Then…it started to change after Moony was able to sniff and lick Harry himself on that night everything came to pass.

He still hadn't told Sirius, didn't exactly know how. How do you tell your best friend, godson to Harry Potter, that said godson is your mate? He had no clue.

All that was making him happy at the moment was the fact that Yule break was coming up and Harry would be coming to Grimmauld Place. They couldn't wait for him to see everything.


"Look at me!"

Dumbledore snapped around to look at him and the pure hatred and anger he felt inside him as he looked into the older man's eyes scared him.

He panted as he tried to get control over himself, beads of sweat rolling down his face. "What's happening to me?" he asked finally.

Dumbledore looked at him, but didn't answer.

"You wished to see me, headmaster?" came a voice from behind him and he turned his head to see Snape.

"Oh, Severus, I'm afraid we can't wait. Not even till morning. Otherwise, we're all vulnerable."

Snape nodded and grabbed his arm, dragging him out of the office, through the halls and down the stairs, and into his classroom. After closing and spelling the door, Snape walked in front of him. "Harry, what happened?"

"I…" he continued to try and control himself though he felt the anger dim now that he wasn't near Dumbledore. "I had a dream. Like I was attacking Mr. Weasley."

"The Dark Lord can enter your mind Harry. We need to fix this or like Dumbledore said, we're all vulnerable."


Break finally came, and it couldn't have been sooner. He needed to be away from the school. With Umbridge taking over the school, his real Occlumency classes and the ones he had to fake to make look like Snape was basically torturing him was tiring.

He and Hermione arrived at Grimmauld as the Weasleys were already there when they left early because of Mr. Weasley's attack. Remus wasn't there when they arrived, but Sirius was and Harry couldn't believe how different the house looked. And it wasn't even finished.

"It looks great Sirius."

"Thank you Harry. It has some work left, but I think it's coming around."

They smiled and exchanged a hug before they headed into the kitchen with the rest of the Weasleys for lunch.

The rest of the break went fine except for the fact that Remus hadn't come. Sirius said he was sent on a mission which Harry could understand, but it left him upset that he had to wait till the end of the year to see Remus.

The last day of their break, Mr. Weasley was let out of St. Mungo's and was able to join them to exchange presents. A toast before they ate by Mr. Weasley was said and it left Harry feeling highly uncomfortable.

As Harry, Hermione, and Ron headed down the stairs to head outside for their ride back to the station as break was over, Harry just listened as his friends talked.

"I can't understand why you don't want to wear it Ronald," Hermione said about the sweater Mrs. Weasley made for Ron.

"I look like a bloody idiot, that's why."

Harry saw a room as they finished down the stairs and headed towards it as his friends continued on.

"No more than usual Ronald. I don't know why…"

They trailed off as he looked in the room, tree branches along the walls with faces and black scorches.

"This is the Black family tree."

He turned to see Sirius standing in the doorway, looking around the room. "I haven't been able to get to this room and I'm sure it'll require some research on how to remove it." At his frown he explained, "Magic keeps it here, updates whenever a child is born into the family, when one dies, and when one is disowned." He walked into the room. "I hated the lot of them," he explained. "My parents with their pure-blood mania."

He pointed to a black scorch and under it said his name. "My mother did that after I ran away. Charming woman. I was 16."

Harry looked at the sad expression on Sirius' face and asked, "Where did you go?"

"Round your dad's. I was always welcomed at the Potters'." Sirius looked at Harry. "I see him in you so much, Harry. You are so very much alike."

"I'm not so sure. Sirius, when I was…" He tried to gather this thoughts before he started again. "When I saw Mr. Weasley being attacked, I wasn't just watching. I was the snake. And afterwards, in Dumbledore's office, there was a moment when I wanted to-" His jaw clenched as he tried to breathe through the lingering hate and anger he felt from that moment.

"This connection between me and Voldemort. What if the reason for it is because I'm becoming more like him?" Finally he was getting it out. Saying his fears. "I just feel so angry…all the time. And what if after everything that I've been through, something's gone wrong inside me? What if I'm becoming bad?"

Sirius grabbed his shoulders and held him. "I want you to listen to me very carefully, Harry. You're not a bad person. You're a very good person who bad things have happened to. You understand?" He nodded as he did. "Besides, the world isn't divided into good people and Death Eaters. We've all got light and dark inside of us. What matters is the part we choose to act on. That's who we really are."

A knock at the door had them looking to see Hermione. "Ready Harry? It's time to go."

Harry nodded and he and Sirius walked out the room. "Tell Remus I said hi?" he asked.

Sirius smiled. "I'll do it. Come here." He pulled Harry into his arms and Harry hugged him back, relaxing under the strokes to the back of his neck. "Be safe Harry," Sirius said as they separated.

"You too Sirius."


School became worse as Dumbledore disappeared and Umbridge took over as headmaster. Their hiding place for their lessons in the Room of Requirement had been found, and all participants had to write lines with the blood quills. Umbridge watching in satisfaction in the headmaster's chair.

Needing air one night, Harry took a walk and came to Fred and George trying to comfort one of the smaller students.

"You can hardly see ours anymore, and the pain stops after a while." The small boy continued to cry when they heard the tell ahem from Umbridge. They turned to her and Fred and George stood up while Harry moved forward.

"As I told you once before, Mr. Potter, naughty children deserve to be punished."

They stared at Umbridge and watched as she watched away before Fred spoke. "You know, George, I always felt our futures lay outside the world of academic achievement."

"Fred, I've been thinking exactly the same thing."

Harry turned to them and saw their mischievous look in their eyes and knew Umbridge was in for it. "Just don't go crazy guys."

They both looked at him with a smile. "You know what else I'm thinking Fred?" George asked.

"What George?"

George didn't answer. Instead, he grabbed Harry's face, leaned down, and kissed him.

So surprised, he didn't do anything but stand there shocked. George pulled back and smiled, and then Fred took his turn to grab his face, lean down, and kiss him.

Harry just stood there blinking when Fred finally ended the kiss.

"Thanks Harry," they said. "Always wondered what kissing you would be like." And they walked away with the boy.


'That was wicked,' Harry thought as the firework that Fred and George threw turned into a dragon and chased Umbridge out of the Hall, all her rules breaking and chattering to the ground. All the students ran out to watch and applaud the twins on their dare and what everyone wanted to do.

All of a sudden, the noise around him dimmed, as if he was suddenly merged under water. He felt his mind spin and his body collapse as visions flashed through his mind. "I need that prophesy."

"You'll have to kill me," Sirius said as he kneeled in the middle of a room with white smoky globes on tall shelves.

"Oh," Voldemort drawled, "I will. But first, you will fetch it for me. Crucio!" Sirius screamed and Voldermort cast it again. "Crucio!"

A door. A hall. 97 .128. It was all so fast before it ended and he saw Hermione crouched in front of him worried.

"Sirius."


Remus knew something was happening. He just couldn't say what it was. He and Moony could feel it, could feel it in their bones or as Harry liked to say their gut. Something wasn't right and it involved Harry.

"Sirius," he called as he charged into Grimmauld Place. The place looked better since the last time he saw it before Christmas, but he didn't have time to dwell on it. "Sirius!"

"Remus?" Sirius asked standing in the doorway to the kitchen. "What are you doing here?"

"Something's wrong."

"You're right." He stepped aside and Remus realized the kitchen was full with Order members. "Severus just floo called us to tell us that Harry and his friend snuck out for the Ministry of Magic."

"How'd you know something was wrong?" Dumbledore asked.

"Doesn't matter. What's the plan?"

Dumbledore started telling the plan and they immediately set out.


"Get away from my godson."

Remus apparated in with the others and already shielded a curse and threw one back. Tonks gathered the children while the others fought the Death Eaters. Sirius and Harry were stuck near the archway and Moony was howling to get them away. He charged and took out the Death Eater who joined Lucius Malfoy and watched as Harry disarmed Lucius, making him lose his wand.

"Nice one James!" Sirius cried in the excitement and stunned Lucius.

"Avada Kedavra!"

The green killing curse flew towards the two and his heart lodged in his throat as he saw them both jump out the way. The killing curse didn't hit either one, but as Sirius jumped out the way, he started to go into the veil. Running, he and Harry both grabbed Sirius before the veil could fully take him.

"Sirius?" Harry whispered, fear in his voice.

"That's one experience I never want to experience again."

Harry laughed relieved and finally looked at him. Remus smirked at the widening of his eyes though he and Moony were both inwardly growling at the marks on Harry's face. "Remus?"

"Hello Harry."

"You-You look…uh…you look different."

"Why thank you."

"Yes, don't mind me. I only just almost died and we're in the middle of a fight."

Harry blushed while Remus smirked and turned his attention to Sirius. And he was so focused on checking his friend; he didn't see Harry slip away.


Harry chased after Bellatrix, or thought he did, but came upon Voldemort and Dumbledore fighting. The power was so amazing yet frightening as they went against each other with everything they had.

Voldemort shattered all class in the main opening of the Ministry and spelled them to fly at Dumbledore, and himself as Harry was standing a bit behind Dumbledore. But Dumbledore threw up a shield that changed all the glass into sand as they passed. None one shard of glass hit them.

Harry covered his eyes so he didn't get sand in his eyes and looked up once he felt the wind stop. Voldemort stood there with anger as neither was hurt, and vanished.

"Professor-" His body suddenly clenched and felt like he was choking as he felt an unfamiliar presence enter his body. He convulsed into a heap on the floor, his body contorting and he could feel his own eyes change.

Harry looked at Dumbledore, but it wasn't him. He spoke to Dumbledore, but it wasn't his voice. "You've lost old man."

He screamed as memories of his mother and father flashed through him, the almost death of Sirius. He couldn't get enough air. Are they even his lungs he's trying to fill? Is this his body?

'Yes!'

Fighting was hard, why was he fighting?

"So weak. So…vulnerable." He was standing in front of a mirror. "Look at me." He was. And they were the same. Weren't they? Wasn't that why he felt angry all the time? He was bad, he was evil, he and Voldemort were the same.

"Harry," he heard from a distance, "it isn't how you are alike. It's how you are not."

Were they different?

'Yes! Harry fight!'

That light he felt months ago shined brighter and he felt his fight restore. He wasn't like Voldemort. He was different. They were nothing alike, they weren't the same.

Harry twitched on the floor and saw his friends, Remus, and Sirius off in a distance. He was different. Flashes of his friends, Hermione's warm, excited, and first hug she gave him during their second year, Ron, his mother, his father, Sirius who almost died, his friends through the years they've stuck with him. Remus. He had Remus.

He wasn't weak!

"You're the weak one…" he spoke, "…and you'll never know love or friendship. And I feel sorry for you."

Flashes rushed through him without him seeing, only one and of the only kiss Remus and he have share, before he fell on his back with a cry and felt the unfamiliar presence sucked out of him.

Voldemort stood over him as everything stilled around them. "You're a fool Harry Potter, and you will lose…everything."


"Hey Harry."

Harry turned to face Hermione as they all sat on the train heading back home. Happily, he was going to go live with Sirius as Dumbledore decided that there was a loophole for everything. And he'd rather have Harry living with wizards than with muggles because on the off chance they find a loophole in finding Harry; Harry would have at least two trained wizards with him living at the headquarters where as he'd only have muggles living with his aunt and uncle.

"Yeah?"

"I found an interesting book the last time we went into Hogsmeade."

'Okay…' Deciding to humor her, "Really?"

"Yeah. You may find it interesting too."

'Doubt it.' "Okay. What is it?"

She smirked and handed over a book. "Being a mate to a werewolf."

Blushing and sputtering, Harry tried to find words but found none. Not that any was needed as Hermione only laughed and turned her attention back to the rest of the people in their car.

Figuring he could save himself some boredom, he opened the book to the first page.

Being A Mate To A Werewolf

Chapter 1

How to tell if you are a mate?

There are few signs to being the mate of a werewolf…


A/N: Please review!