Back at the present (well for the 3rd film/book present)! Keep reviewing peeps
Sirius, sitting opposite me in the clearing where he'd been attacked suddenly flicked his head up. "They're here, they're coming, Remus get out of here!" He hissed.
"Sirius, who's here?" I asked desparately, seeking answers in his grey eyes. His gaunt face held an expression of fear and dark resignation. "The Ministry, Moony I'm begging you, go, I am not dragging you down with me."
My mind went blank and I barely felt the leaves crunching beneath my feet. I had gone numb. My Padfoot had been found and was going to suffer a fate worse than death. A dementors kiss. I was close to crying, I had shed so many tears over Sirius through my youth, a few more wouldn't hurt.
But no, I had to be strong for him. So when he looked back he saw a confident, comforting face. Not a grown man crying, mourning a man who was still alive. No I would mourn once he was definitely dead. Or a soulless shell, which I considered worse, worse because I could see him, see the exquisite man I grew up loving, but he wouldn't be the man I loved, the man I had shared all of my teenage experiences with.
I gripped onto the sturdy oak I was behind, willing myself not to collapse. I was always the weaker one. Weaker personality, weaker mind, weaker body. Just weak. I saw the Ministry members come over to the docile, quivering form that was my love. He got up and followed them soundlessly and I managed to stagger away from them, towards the school.
I had to get out of this place. I would blame it on my lycanthropy but the truth was I needed to follow Sirius, see that he was ok, even if that meant him going to Azkaban and me trying to move on with my life until he escaped again.
I brought myself to Dumbledores office, a facade of normality encasing my shaky emotions. Before I even knocked he invited me in, serenely he sat behind his battered old desk.
"I know why you are here Remus. Don't try and fool my by telling me its because of your montly transformations."
"But Albus-"
"You forget I was your headmaster when you were here. I was not oblivious to yours and Sirius's relationship. You care for him still. I understand."
"The students and faculty, they can't know, blame it on the werewolf" Dumbledore nodded and I walked back to my study to pack my things, my shoes clicking dully on the stone floor.
A few students wished me a good evening and I merely nodded in their direction. Nothing was good about this evening.
Sirius was trapped up in a tower that I had no clue the whereabouts of. He was going to be kissed by a dementor. Those lips were mine, sworn to me.
They were going to take his last kiss. Again that belonged to me. I frantically flicked my wand, packing up my belongings. I didn't get very far and figured staying another night here wouldn't hurt. I curled up against an ancient huge bookcase and desparately tried to get some sleep.
After my transformation I was extremely tired. I would pay for this in the morning, I had tried not sleeping after a full moon before. It was much like a hangover, headaches, tiredness. General pain.
I groaned and buried my head in my knees. Such a childish position but I wanted to be a child now. Or at least a teenager, Sirius and I just being together. He had got over James, because of me and well the fact that James had moved on. But after that we were so happy. My changes were in control and the rest of the month was perfect.
As far as I could tell I stayed like that until dawn , but who knows, I was only semi concious and pretty sure I was dreaming.
"But soft, what light through yonder window breaks."
Great now I'm dreaming about Shakespeare, like my bloody Romeo was coming for me.
"It is the East, and Juliet is the sun!"
Stop taunting me subconcoius mind! I am sick of this. Wake up you idiot.
" Arise, fair sun, and kill the envious moon"
And now this dream sounds like Sirius. Sirius, oh Sirius.
Love looks not with the eyes, but with the mind;
And therefore is winged Cupid painted blind.
Now even I was Shakespearing now and it was not good, I had officially began my slow descent into madness.
"Who is already sick and pale with grief."
I'm the one who is bloody sick and pale with grief. I'm the one that got left behind. I'm the one who has to carry on.
"That thou her maid art far more fair than she." A breeze through the window played my hair and cooled the room down. It was the last straw. I wanted this room to be as stuffy and dark and suffocating as it could be. I wanted to die. My head snapped up and looked towards the window.
Sirius, there on the window, Sirius! He's alive and there and I'm tripping over myself. I rushed over to embrace him, harder and for longer than ever before. When I got to him however I just stood there, grinning at him like all my christmases had come at once.
He pulled himself through the window and just stood before me. "You're a fool, coming back here," I chided gently. He smiled reassuringly and took my hand in his "You're the idiot who fell in love with the fool."
I smiled faintly to myself, about how love didn't cover on millionth of how I felt towards him. "Yes...yes I am," I mumbled. Sirius leaned in and kissed me gently, one hand in my hair, the other on my cheek. I placed my hand onto his and deepened the kiss before pulling away and placing a steady stream of kisses on his pouting lips. I wanted to remember this, make it last. Make it carry me through the dark abyss when we were apart.
He brought us back together for a few needy seconds before I reluctantly pulled away, taking in his starved, yet shyly smiling face.
"Go, before they see you, and for God sakes don't get caught." I whispered, practically begging him "Siri...stay safe. If not for you, then for me."
We embraced quickly and then he clambered back out of the window. I sighed and returned to packing.
