Disclaimer: I do not own Criminal Minds or any character associated with it, no copyright infringement is intended.

A/N: As always, I want to thank everyone who has reviewed, made this story a favorite & subscribed to this story. This chapter picks up during the episode "Higher Power"


Aaron was standing alone in his office, his go-bag was packed and sitting on his desk. His office seemed dark and lonely, almost like a cave, despite the ample natural light coming from the window. Aaron knew what he was going to do and he believed it was the right thing to do, but he was in his office instead of doing it. He looked out the window, not so much seeing the scenery outside as his reflection. He had to face what he was feeling right now, and it wasn't complicated.

He was afraid. He had no problem facing off against Strauss, dealing with local authorities, or facing unsubs but the prospect of going home to try and repair his relationship with his family filled him with paralyzing dread. It shouldn't be this hard, he thought. He was so deep in thought that he almost didn't hear David Rossi knock on his door.

"Hey, we've got a case," Rossi said.

Hotch turned around to face him.

There was something in way that Aaron looked at Rossi that gave the older agent a hint that something was wrong. Then Rossi saw Hotch's go-bag on the desk. "Either you've decided we're taking the case or that bag's going somewhere else." Rossi said.

The look Hotch gave him made him realize that something was definitely up.

"I need a favor," Hotch said.

"Of course."

"I need to take some personal time. A day at the most."

"Take all the time you need," Rossi said. Whatever Hotch was going to do, Rossi could see it was eating him from the inside out.

"Haley sent the divorce papers."

"I thought she sent them a few weeks ago."

"She did. I didn't sign them. She agreed to talk to me face to face." There was a tense moment of silence. "I can't lose her Dave. " Hotch's voice was thick with emotion.

Rossi put his hand on Hotch's shoulder, "Take all the time you need, Aaron. We've got this."

"Thanks," Hotch said.

"I mean it," Dave said,"We've got this. You do what you have do, and don't worry about us. I've never regretted anything as much as the fact none of my marriages lasted."

Hotch nodded. "Thank you."


"If there's any doubt," Emily said, "Don't those families have right to know?"

They were in briefing room going over the possible case. On the surface it didn't look like a BAU case. There was a spike of suicides in Pittsburgh in the aftermath of a community center fire. There wasn't a unanimous consensus on the case. Morgan didn't think it was a case. Emily was clearly advocating for it.

Reid...

Reid wasn't coming out and advocating for the case exactly. He was just stating facts which supported the conclusion something was unusual about the situation.

That left JJ. She was silent about it. Except she brought them the case to begin with, and Rossi realized by now she screened out the cases she didn't think were worth the teams attention. Plus, her facial expression told him she thought it was important. As Rossi was thinking about it, he saw Hotch walk out of his office with his go-bag slung over his shoulder.

Good Luck, Aaron. I hope you don't have to join the FBI failed marriage club. We've got too many members as it is.

Rossi turned around and looked at JJ. "Tell Det. Baleman we're coming to Pittsburgh."

Rossi could see that Morgan wasn't happy about it, but Rossi never worried if he decisions made people happy before. Besides, even if there wasn't any compelling evidence there was an unsub at work, it sure felt like it. And that was enough for Rossi.


While the team debated the case and made their preparations to depart, Aaron Hotchner drove to Haley's house.

Her house, not his anymore. The house they had shared was vacant. She would move back there when the divorce was final and not before, at least that what she said when she sent him the divorce papers.

But hopefully the divorce would never be final. All he had to was convince her not to divorce him. There was a time it would have been a simple case to make, all he would have to was to transfer out of the BAU. The problem was that he didn't do it. And now ...

The lawyer in him was struggling to come up with an argument to convince her not to go through with the divorce. It wasn't like he could tell her that he would make more time to be at home, she knew the long hours were part of the job. It was why the transfer out of the BAU made sense.

It made sense to her, not to you Aaron.

The thought made Aaron ponder why had he chosen to stay? Was is to protect the team from Strauss? Did he really believe she would tear it apart if he wasn't there? Did he really believe that Strauss had it in for the team?

Maybe.

That's not going to cut it Aaron, and you know it. If you want to save your marriage, to have any chance, you are going to have to explain why you stayed. Why you invest so much energy in doing your job. You have to tell her the real reason you stay.

It felt like the right thing to do. The team needed me too.

If you're going to lie to yourself and Haley, you might as well sign the papers right now. You know the real reason you stay and it has nothing to do with the team or Erin Strauss.

The voice in his head was beginning to sound like Reid. There was a time the thought would sound like Jason Gideon. Aaron wasn't sure if it was a good sign or not that Reid's voice took over a role Gideon once fulfilled.

You know the real reason. It was the same reason you picked a fight with Chester Hardwick.

I picked a fight with Chester because of the divorce papers.

Who's lying now?

The internal voice didn't sound Reid anymore. It sounded like Chester.

No it didn't. He knew exactly who's voice was in his head now. The voice that was always in his head, ever since he was a boy.

The man who showed Aaron at an early age that monsters were real, the world could be harsh, and Aaron had better learn how to fight.

His father.

Not Ray Hotchner, but his actual biological father. The one who used to hit him.


A/N: I've gone over a number of past episodes that have parts of Hotch's back story, but they don't fit together nicely. So, I've tried to find a way to weave them together in a way that makes sense. We'll see more of this in the next chapter, where I promise that Hotch and Haley will have their talk.