Chapter 3 In the Unstable Mind of Dean Ambrose


During the break the Authority was in a fit of rage with Seth a little confused at first (he didn't remember being cute and chubby).

"We have to find a way to take control of this show!" Stephanie said angrily.

"How?" Seth asked. "That insane hostess controls it! With her: Oh, I'll turn you into cute little toddlers," Seth mimicked Aria's sweet voice. "She's infuriating, downright annoying and -!" he stamped his foot, finally remembering his cuddly point in the show.

"Calm down, Seth." Hunter said sternly. "Control your emotions; don't let them control you,"

The Architect raised an eyebrow. "You made a little boy cry a few weeks back on Raw,"

Triple H sighed. "Well, that was a most unfortunate situation."

Stephanie decided steer the conversation away from that incident. She screamed enough at her husband for making a child cry anyway. Besides, he did make up for it.

"What's done is done." she said. "And if we're going to Coup d'état this show, then we can't berate ourselves for past mistakes right now," she cautioned.

Triple H and Seth nodded in agreement.

"We'll control this show soon enough," Triple H smirked at Stephanie. "Just like we control the WWE itself."

XXX

Aria smiled at the camera, as the guests (finally) settled down once again after the break.

"We're back! But before we move on there is an important announcement I need to make for our viewers…" the hostess began.

"This show is cancelled," Roman muttered hopefully.

"Please note that this show is rated PG." Aria continued. "Any questions or dares that exceed that rating cannot be used. We apologize, and trust you understand. Thank you."

"That could be boring," Dean yawned.

"Fine, we'll raise the rating just for you, Ambrose," Seth rolled his eyes. After the break, Seth sat down next to Triple H, instead of his original place that was closer to Roman. "Especially for the dares."

"No!" Dean said quickly. "Maybe for you, Sell Out?"

Aria sighed. "Do you guys have to fight over everything?"

She ignored their immediate response ("Yes!") and carried on. Roman automatically rolled his eyes; he had gotten used to Dean and Seth's childish bantering over the years…

"Our first question is from Apocalypse 17." Aria read from her computer.

"Is the world coming to an end?" Dean asked bluntly.

Aria turned to Roman with an incredulous look: Is he serious?

Roman sighed. "I know; can't take him anywhere, this one,"

Aria giggled.

"It's the name of the person that's asking the question," Roman explained to Dean with an air of one talking to a child.

"Oh!" Dean exclaimed. "Cool name: it's like 'destruction.' Awesome!"

Seth rolled his eyes. "You are nuts. So what's the question, anyway?" he asked carefully.

"Well it's actually a dare that pertains to you, Seth." Aria replied and chuckled along with the rest of the Shield as Seth sunk in his chair. She turned back to the computer to read out the dare:

I dare the Authority to admit they forced Seth to sell out.

Apocalypse 17

Roman and Dean immediately sat up straight, ready to pounce on Triple H. After all Seth did, sure they weren't going to forgive him easily...but they were still going to make the Authority pay.

"As part of the Authority, I'll answer that," Seth said, his tone edged with anger. "No one forces me to do anything. Triple H and Stephanie made me an offer, which I'd have been stupid to refuse. And I may be a 'sell out', but I'm NOT stupid!"

Dean snorted. "Wanna bet?"

Triple H however, burst out laughing. "Okay. We forced Seth to sell out. Happy?"

Stephanie shrugged. "You dared us, so we did."

"You had to admit it," Cena said. "Admit is another word for confess. So you have to confess."

"No, it was clearly a Dare and not a Confess," Triple H said.

Aria nodded quietly.

"And admit to what? Seth Rollins knows what's best for him – and what's best for business." Stephanie put in. "We gave him an opportunity and the Architect, just as he said, was smart enough to accept."

The Shield turned their back to them, their expressions made of stone.

Cena's eyebrows knitted together, deep in thought, while Aria looked at Seth. The Architect had been initially looking at Roman and Dean, before turning back to the audience, his expression impassive.

Aria sighed. Apocalypse17 asked for a dare not a confession. There wasn't much she could do since they completed the dare. She almost felt sorry for Seth. Almost.

"Can we also ask questions?" Cena asked quickly. "Or a confession, perhaps?"

"Well you can, but only the WWE Universe's requests must be adhered to." She replied. "Not the employees of the WWE. Unless..."

"Unless, what?" Roman asked.

"The WWE Universe says so," Aria said. "Part of 'daring' I guess," she added thoughtfully.

"What?" Dean asked confused.

"Well you guys can dare each other or demand answers/questions from one another, but the compliance won't be obligatory," Aria explained. "However, if the universe requests one superstar to dare or ask for a confession from another superstar..."

"I get it," Roman grinned. "For example, the universe can give permission for Dean to dare Seth to do something,"

Dean smirked and turned to Seth.

"Speaking of which, our next tweet is from lovetheshield123." Aria said reading from the computer screen.

"Oh great, another Shield fan," Bad News Barrett scoffed. "When am I going to get a question?! This show is fixed, I tell you!"

"You think we're being favoured here?" Roman deadpanned.

Aria grinned. "Yes!" she turned back to the computer and promptly fell off the chair from silent fits of laughter.

Sighing, Roman went over and helped her up. "I take it the question isn't good, is it?" without waiting for an answer he returned back to his seat. "For us anyway,"

"Thank you, Roman," Aria said trying to compose herself to read out the tweet:

Ask Roman and Dean if they would like to give Seth a spanking.

lovetheshield123

"WHAT?!" Seth hollered.

"Well you act like a bratty kid," Cena put in. "Always whining."

"Yes!" Dean stood up and pounced on Seth with the Lou Thesz Press (Running Front Grapple). "We'd love to beat the he-"

"Stop," Aria said, almost lazily, as Dean held a fist in the air over Seth's face.

"Oh yeah; Dean can go fir-" Roman, still seated, looked at Aria confused. "What? Why?!"

"Both of you have answered the answered the question. Now sit Dean, please," Aria said calmly. "The next question is from Cybella,"

Dean grumbled but didn't get up.

"Get off!" Seth shouted. "Get OFF me, you lunatic!"

Aria ignored the kids-, sorry, the superstars and continued reading from the computer.

Ask Seth if he still cares about Roman and Dean?

Seth rollins babe

"Ha!" Seth scoffed as he pushed Dean off him. "Yeah right,"

"Alright then," Aria shrugged and went back to the computer trying hard not to smile.

Roman and Dean just remained motionless their face blank, indifferent. But their eyes betrayed them.

"Ouch!" Seth suddenly jumped up, rubbing his bottom. "What the hell was that?!"

"Oh just our magical lie detector," Aria said casually, still looking at the screen. "Quite effective, though nothing deadly. And it doesn't matter where you are," she added as Seth moved to get up from the floor.

Avoiding the looks of the Authority and his former Shield brethren, Seth sat back down.

"I believe Seth rollins babe is waiting," Aria said, as Dean got up and sat back down next to Roman.

"Given the nickname one would think the girl liked me," Seth grumbled. Swallowing hard, he looked at Aria. "Yes, okay?! I still care about my brothers!"

There was a communal gasp around the auditorium, as the Authority began to look uncomfortable. Seth returned to his seat.

Aria definitely smiled this time. "Well when someone cares about you, they do things in your best interest, Seth. Whether you see it at the time or not."

Seth just gave her an incredulous look. What?

"Moving on," Aria said, turning her attention back to the screen.

Love it.

Aria beamed. "Thank you! Thank you!"

Seth almost fell off his chair. "Don't encourage her! Please!"

Aria pretended not to hear Seth and read on.

I have a question for Seth and Roman. You do know J&J will bail on you once Brock breaks your arm. You know he's going to. I do love how you curb stomped John Cena. That was such a lovely sight and can't wait to see it again. I'm not going to ask you why you sold out. I know you are up to something. So Seth...What are you going to do once the Authority finishes using you like a piece of toilet paper?

Roman this is for you. You were rumoured to Win the Royal Rumble now that plan has been nixed *glares at HHH* People say you're not ready for the push. I believe you are ready. So what do you want to say to the haters out there? And I hear you go commando *winks*

shellbell33

Seth smirked."Does anyone really think I don't know about Triple H's history of betraying his 'friends'?" he replied arrogantly. "I helped him with his latest betrayal of Randy Orton. Yes, the Authority is using me. Just like I am using them. I'm not in wrestling to make friends. I wasn't in The Shield to make friends. I'm not in The Authority to make friends. Just like with The Shield I'm in The Authority to learn what I can and move up in my career." Seth gave a shrug, appearing totally unconcerned. "Once The Authority and I are done using each other, I will… adapt. Evolve. Move on."

"What's Best for Business," Stephanie said nodding her approval. Hunter remained silent.

"Yup, you just carry on evolving," Aria said dryly.

Dean nodded. "Yeah, it will take you a million years to get to get to Roman and my level, Seth," he smirked. "Give or take,"

Aria giggled as Seth shot her a look.

"Don't look at me, I didn't say that!" She protested. "Anyway Roman, you're up."

"Well, thanks for your support." Roman looked confused for a moment. "If you don't believe in yourself, you have already lost," he said simply. "So in answer to your question, I definitely believe I am going to win, if not me, then my brother, Dean...because the Shield always comes out on top. And you better believe that." He glared at Seth for a moment. "What do I say to the haters? I say I'm going to enjoy proving them wrong. As for me going commando, that's between my wife and I."

"Do you miss her Seth?" Dean asked. "Stephanie may give you unfair advantages in the Ring, but she really doesn't care about you, as Triple H doesn't."

Seth ignored him.

"She had a Christmas present for me. And sent some of my favourite treats for my birthday," Dean said smugly and Aria understood he was talking about Mrs. Reigns. "Did she send for you too? Oh I forgot; you betrayed her husband, your brother, with a steel chair!"

"Dean, let's move on," Aria said quietly, as Seth remained silent, looking at the floor. "The next one is for you."

"Surprise, surprise," Bad News Barrett rolled his eyes.

Dean Ambrose, I dare you to admit you liked being a cute toddler in a certain story, and to state one good thing about each of the other contestants.

Nylora Greenleaf

Dean smiled, but it was not a nice one. "I'm gonna kill one prissy princess! This thing has her fingerprints all over it!"

Aria rolled her eyes. "Well, duh,"

"I meant this dare alone!" Dean growled.

"Nope, said authoress has nothing to do with this dare, or any at all," Aria said honestly.

"Either you admit that you like being a toddler, or you'll be turned into one, Dean!" Seth said gleefully.

"Shut up, Rollins," Roman said dangerously.

Seth recoiled. He knew all too well of the Powerhouse's temper; especially when it came to defending his brothers. The Sell Out swallowed. Brother.

Dean smirked. "Oh, yeah," he said sarcastically. "Of course I liked being a toddler in that story…" He was silent for a moment, before speaking more seriously. "I did like the chocolate… And fighting Randy at Hell in a Cell… And the part about getting my US Title back was great…" He turned to Aria. "The dare was that I have to say one good thing about each person. But that doesn't mean that's all I can say, right? As long as I say one good thing, I can say whatever else I want without… consequences?" he asked, mindful of the cameras and not wanting to be a toddler.

Aria nodded. "Within reason, of course..." she cautioned. After all, this was Dean Ambrose.

The Shield Affiliate looked around (indifferent), in the general direction of the person he addressed:

"Seth, you're my favorite person to wrestle against." Dean said. "Have been since our first clash back in the Indys."

Seth's expression softened as he thought back over their matches. Dean was also his favorite person to wrestle against. The one who was the greatest challenge for him, and therefore, made him better.

"Scumbag," Dean added, and Seth's expression hardened again.

Dean turned to the COO. "Triple H… you're a great dad to your girls." He said. "You're also a power-hungry, son-of-a-"

"Dean!" Aria said quickly.

Triple H shrugged. No mystery there.

"Yeah well you know what I mean," Dean continued. "Stephanie… You are an amazing mother."

Stephanie couldn't help the slight smile that curved her lips. It fell away when he did the Hacksaw Jim Duggan "HOOOOO!"

Aria face-palmed.

Triple H shot out of his seat in a fit of rage. "AMBROSE!"

"Calm down, Hunter!" Aria said quickly bringing order by putting a magical barrier between the Authority and the Shield, as Roman was already on his feet to defend Dean.

"Honey, calm down, it's okay," Stephanie said softly putting a hand on his arm.

Aria sighed. "Well…let's move on. And Dean, I understand you have to insult. But try not to be too… oh, never mind."

"Barrett, you are one tough son of a- you know what," Dean said, with a quick glance at Aria, "Who can really brawl."

They shared a look of mutual respect. Dislike, but respect.

"You're also really annoying...and a little ignorant and stupid considering you love this show." Dean said simply.

The Intercontinental Champion narrowed his eyes. "Says you,"

"Oh, thanks, Dean," Aria said dryly. "Considering this is my show,"

Dean shrugged. "Cena. I like that you don't change what you believe, no matter how many of the fans boo you."

Cena gave him a slight nod of acknowledgement.

"No matter how stupid those beliefs are," The Lunatic Fringe added, and Cena couldn't help but grin at him. Dean was still Dean after all.

Dean turned to the Viper. "Orton… You're a great wrestler, and just as unstable as I am."

They held eye contact for a moment, both knowing they'd meet in the ring, and that it would be insane. And Randy understood that Dean calling him unstable was part of him saying something good, not really an insult.

Dean gestured at Hunter. "But you have really, really lousy taste in friends,"

Randy responded by nodding in Seth's direction. "Yours isn't any better, Ambrose."

"Yeah it is," Dean said, and gave Roman a casual fist bump to make his point, before continuing the dare.

"Lesnar, you really are a monster – and can back that up in the ring." Dean said casually. "You're also a lousy, part-time Champion."

Brock ignored him.

"Hayman… You're great on a mic, next to me of course." Dean said, ignoring Aria. "And you're also a self-serving idiot."

Hayman shot him a look – from behind the Beast Incarnate of course. Paul did complain earlier to the WWE Headquarters about the show (and yes he got humiliated for being juvenile, considering it's the WWE Universe sending in questions, and nothing to do with the company).

Dean looked directly at the powerhouse next to him; everyone else was because he was compelled to, but this compliment was not something Dean had to think hard for.

"Roman… No one could hope for a better brother than you are to me."

"Right back at you, brother," Roman said as they exchanged warm smiled along with a gentle fist pound. Seth looked uncomfortable.

Dean smirked. "On the other hand..."

Roman playfully narrowed his eyes at him. "Of course, why leave me out of the insults?" he grinned at the Lunatic Fringe.

"You're married, but you still get all the chicks' attention." Dean pretended to be annoyed. "Not cool, man. Not cool."

Aria noticed Dean addressed everyone by their surname except for Roman and...Seth. "Anyway..." the hostess said, "We have our next questions..." she sighed, "For the Shie - well, I'll just read it out," she said with a quick glance at Barrett.

Dean, do you read fanfiction? Roman, how do you keep your hair so great? Seth, why did you dye your hair like that?

AJAmbrolleigns

"I don't have time to read fanfiction!" Dean replied. "Do you have any idea what our schedules are like?"

Aria rolled her eyes. "True, but..."

"But unfortunately I have once. Worst day of my life." Dean shivered.

"I thought the day Seth betrayed you was the worst day," Cena asked, puzzled.

Dean shrugged. "It's close,"

"Roman?" Aria asked.

"My hair?" Roman smirked. "L'Oreal. Because I'm worth it."

"Roman!" Aria warned. "Stop stealing Yugi's lines."

"Who?" Barrett asked, confused.

"The kid with the tri-coloured hair," Cena rolled his eyes. "From an anime, and his answer when he was in a show just like us,"

"Poor kid," Seth shook his head.

"Fine then," Roman agreed. "Lather, rinse, repeat."

"Roman!" Aria laughed.

The Powerhouse sighed. "I do what everyone does – wash every other day (considering it's already wet from matches) and dry with a hair dryer. Oh, and use Dean's special home-made shampoo."

"No GHD?" Aria chuckled. "Maybe you could try it sometime..."

Stephanie laughed. "Home-made? Like he puts milk and eggs in there?"

"Something like that." Dean replied. "Oh, and some prune juice, sometimes cereal."

"What?!" Brock exclaimed.

"We were beginning to think you lost your voice, part-time-champ," Dean chuckled. "And you hardly have any hair, so what's your problem?"

"Anyway, moving on," Aria said quickly. "Seth?"

Seth shrugged. "Because I think it's cool. And I wanted to be daring. Besides, there are a lot of wrestlers with dark hair like mine." He said. "So I dyed it to make me stand out."

"In other words, you love attention." Cena surmised.

Triple H laughed. "Don't we all?"

"Not like Sell Out here, who would do anything for it," Roman growled.

"Yeah – I mean, moving on," Aria said, "Next is a Dare for Dean,"

I dare Dean to kiss Stephanie?

kimberly316

Dean groaned. "Do I have to? Doesn't Seth do enough kissing-up to the Authority already?"

Aria shrugged.

Sighing, Dean walked over to Stephanie and kissed her cheek.

"Aww, see?" Stephanie said, smiling. Wasn't sweet like Aria's though. "Always knew you had a decent side, Dean. There's hope for you after all."

Dean wasn't listening. "Excuse me," he said to Aria, and then bolted to door.

Roman hid his face, shaking with silent laughter, and a second later Aria knew why.

All the guests' attention turned to the exit where Dean had just left, and sure enough, there were sounds of someone throwing up (with an exaggerated effort).

Stephanie made a face, as everyone continued to remain silent until Dean walked back in.

"Sorry about that," Dean said casually walking back in and sitting next to Roman. "Had to wash my mouth." And the rest of his face and hair apparently; for both were dripping with water.

Roman clapped the Lunatic on the shoulder while Seth frowned at him.

"You should be ashamed!" The Authority's GoldenBoy yelled.

Aria tried to ignore the mini puddles of water on the floor left by the Lunatic. "Well at least Dean knows how to put on a show," she said faintly.

"For once, I agree with you, Aria," Roman said grinning.

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