World on Fire

A/N: Thank you for all of your awesome reviews, alerts and feedback. I hope I can do this story justice. :)


Chapter 2

Kate let out a low hum as she stretched her still half asleep body, reaching her hands up to the wooden slatted headboard as her toes skimmed the matching footboard of her twin bed. She could already hear Laura singing softly under her breath as she dressed in her t-shirt and jeans for the day. Her roommate swung her hips back and forth to the beat in her head as she stood in front of the mirror messing with her hair. Kate's hand came up to rub her eyes and she noticed that she was actually smiling. It was a small smile, barely there, but it was a smile nonetheless.

The night before had been good. It had been very good. For the first time in almost a month she had laughed with abandon. It had been a simple night, nothing special. At least before it had been nothing special. Laura had dragged her out of the room to the common area as Kate protested the entire way, physically digging her heels into the ground in an attempt to stop their momentum. They had been sitting in the common room playing Chubby Bunny, the four of them: Kate, Laura, Mackenzie and Chelsea. As Mackenzie had stuffed the last marshmallow into her mouth a stream of white sticky drool had dribbled out of the corner of her lips, causing her eyes to go wide and her to let out a squeal of panic. The quick expulsion of air for the squeal caused her mouthful of half dissolved marshmallows to begin streaming down her chin, seeping onto her shirt and in her mass of curly red hair as she attempted to catch the pile of sticky, white melted goo with her hands. Mackenzie had screeched for help and Kate had fallen to the floor in a fit of laughter as Chelsea jumped from her chair in an effort to commandeer a towel from a nearby pile of momentarily abandoned laundry.

The owner of the laundry had stood stuttering in the doorway, her face frozen in horror as Mackenzie had proceeded to pick at the white goo in her hair with the girl's designer, monogrammed bath towel. Kate had reigned in her laughter long enough to tilt her head back and look at the girl from her place on the floor, but the look of her face combined with Laura falling on top of her, laughing had forced her into another fit of giggles which had continued long past when she had been forced to bolt to the bathroom to stop her from wetting herself.

"Good morning!" Laura called as she glanced back at Kate through the mirror and Kate waved back in response, still too tired to form a verbal response.

"So," Laura continued as she swiped the mascara wand over her eyelashes, blinking away the clumps. "Have you heard from Paul about Valentine's Day yet? It's in ten days you have to get on that."

Kate shook her head as she rubbed a fist over her eyes. Paul had called a few times since she had snuck out of his room a week before but she hadn't returned his calls. "No, I…"

Her voice trailed off as her brain started to awake. Ten days… That meant that today was. Oh, God, no.

Kate bolted off of the bed and flung open the door as she ran down the hall to the bathroom. A girl let out a groan of disgust as Kate wretched into the toilet, tears streaking down her face.

"Morning after's a bitch," another girl quipped and Kate sunk to her knees as the stall door swung back open behind her.

"Kate? Kate, are you okay?" Laura called as she ran through the door of the bathroom and peered around the corner into the stall cautiously.

"I forgot," Kate groaned as she pulled back from the toilet, resting her head back against the plastic side of the cubicle, her knees pulled up to her chest. "I forgot and I was happy. How could I be happy?"

Laura peered down at her, her face twisted in confusion as she watched her friend stare up at her from her place on the floor. "Kate, what are you talking about?"

"It's her birthday and I woke up and I was happy and I forgot…"

Laura's eyes widened as the situation dawned on her. "Your mom… It's your mom's birthday."

Kate tilted her head down into a nod as tears filled her wide eyes. "I was laughing."

"Oh, sweetie," Laura whispered as tears began to stream down Kate's face and the girls standing by the sinks started to whisper. "It's okay. You're allowed to laugh."

"No," Kate moaned as she shook her head against the stall wall. "No, it's not. She's… God, Laura she's…"

Laura stepped into the stall, sinking down to the ground next to her friend as she shut and latched the door, giving them the illusion of privacy in the public bathroom. "Shh, it's okay. It's okay."

"Oh, God, Laura, she's dead." Kate's chin crumbled as she gasped for breath as fist pressed into her chest, pressing against her heart.

Laura wrapped an arm around Kate and pulled her into her side, gripping Kate to her side as the wet spot on her shoulder grew as Kate's tears drenched her shirt.


"Hey, thanks for coming." Laura greeted as she pulled open the door.

"Yeah, no problem what's up?" Paul's eyes flickered to Kate's still form as she lay on the bed, curled up facing the wall.

"It's her mom's birthday," Laura leaned in and whispered as she shut the door and Paul stood with his hands shoved in the pockets of his Dockers.

Paul tilted his head towards her in confusion. "Did they have a fight or something?"

Laura stared up at him, her eyes wide. "She didn't tell you…"

Paul shook his head. "Tell me what?"

"Her mom died, Paul, over break. Someone killed her."

Kate's body shuddered as she took in a sudden breath and she let out a choked sob.

"I didn't, she didn't. I haven't even seen her since the party. She said her parents were great…" Paul explained as he rubbed a hand across his forehead and scrubbed it down his cheek.

Laura's eyes drifted over to Kate and she sighed as she rocked back on her heels. "We have a paper due today. I have Kate's copy. I just need to go turn them in and I'll be back in an hour. Can you just, I don't know, keep an eye on her? She hasn't moved since I walked her back in here. I don't know what to do…"

Paul opened his mouth to respond but his words died on his lips as the phone on Kate's desk rang, the shrill sound deafening as it cut through the silent, tense air. Laura sighed and stepped forward as she reached for the receiver up to her ear when Kate didn't even twitch at the sound.

"Hello?"

Paul's eyes drifted towards her as she mumbled something and her eyes darted over to Kate. "Yes, hi Mr. Beckett. How are you doing? Um, yeah, Kate's here. Hold on one second."

Laura placed her palm over the mouthpiece as she took a step towards the bed, placing her free hand on Kate's shoulder as she leaned over her friend's still form. "Kate? Your father's on the phone."

Kate's shoulder twitched slightly but she made no further movement, no sound of acknowledgement and Laura was about to make up a half hearted excuse when she suddenly flipped over and sat up in bed, her eyes blood-shot and rimmed in red from crying. Her hand reached out for the phone and Laura held it out to her, without a word.

"Hi Dad," Kate stated into the phone with a strength in her voice that she had summoned from nowhere. "Yeah, I'm doing okay. Of course I remember. No, I'm fine, really. I miss her but I'm fine."

A tear leaked down her cheek and she swiped at it angrily with the heel of her hand as she tilted the phone away from her face and sniffled. "Classes are going great. Yeah, Laura says hi. Of course I'm staying out of trouble, you know me. How are you doing?"

Kate sighed as she rubbed her thumb and forefinger over her forehead. "You go visit her? Good. What are you doing now?"

Kate's eyes darted to the clock. It was eleven am in California, meaning that it was two in the afternoon in New York. She let out a sigh. "Dad? Have you been drinking? No, no of course I don't blame you. I know it's hard. Just make sure you grab a cab home. Is John with you? Good. Can I talk to him?"

Another tear leaked out of her eyes and her face contorted as she rolled her eyes up to the ceiling, shaking her head as she forced the choked sobs back down her throat. "Hi John, yeah I'm doing all right. Just watch out for him, okay? Yeah, you too. Thanks."

The phone fell to the bed beside her as she pressed the back of her hand against her mouth and a sob escaped her lips, her eyes rolling up to look at her roommate and darting to Paul when she saw him watching her with unrestrained sympathy. Laura took a step towards her, a hand reached out and Kate shook her head.

"Just leave, please, both of you, just go," Kate choked out as she dropped her head, pressing her hand against her mouth as she let out a slow breath of air.

"Kate…" Paul started as he took a step forward.

"I said to go!" Kate yelled as she bolted back up from the bed, swinging her legs out so she could stand on shaky ground. "I didn't say bye, I didn't call you. Can't you take a hint? I don't want to do this. I don't want to date you. I don't want you to feel bad for me. I don't want a pity fuck, so just get out!"

"Fine," Paul agreed, shoving his hands in his pockets as he took a step back as Kate's hands clenched into fists at her sides. "I'm going."

The door clicked shut behind him and Kate sunk to the ground her head resting on her knees as she continued to cry.

"I'll be back in an hour," Laura whispered as she gathered up her bag and coat. Kate nodded in reply, not lifting her head from her legs. "Kate… I'm…"

"Don't say it," Kate pleaded, her voice raw as she lifted her head to look at her friend. "Please just don't tell me you're sorry."

Laura bobbed her head in agreement, her upper lip pulled between her teeth as she turned towards the door. "Okay."


"Why are you here, Kate?"

Kate's eyes rolled up from where she had been studying her fingernails, absently wondering if she should go get a manicure after her appointment, if that was appropriate behavior. "My mom died."

The counselor nodded, her head cocked to the side as she silently waited for Kate to continue.

Kate stared at her blank expression, the passive look etched on features, the concern flickering in her eyes. Kate shook her head and pressed her palm against her mouth as she stared out the window overlooking the quad.

Only when she continued to stare out the window silently, watching the world pass her by did the counselor continue, prompting her on with a question, the dreaded question which forced Kate's eyes closed with a sigh. "How does that make you feel?"

"How do you think it makes me feel?" Kate spat back. "My mom is dead."

The woman continued to look at her, expressionless as she leaned back in her chair, waiting for Kate's defensive anger to pass.

Kate deflated back into her chair with a sigh, nestling back into the corner, her knees pulled up to her chin. "I feel nothing or everything at once. It's like I'm numb and then I am writhing in pain. There is no middle, no balance. I didn't want to come today, my friend made the appointment, made me come. She said she was afraid… she was afraid for me."

"Are you angry?"

Kate tilted her head to the side, resting it on the back of the chair. "Yeah, I'm angry but I know they will catch the bastard that killed her and then at least I will have someone to be angry at. Once that happens everything will be okay, I'll be able to move on."

The counselor nodded as she unfolded her hands and lifted one from her lap, gesturing out in front of her. "What if they don't catch him?"

Kate lifted her head as she looked at the other woman in question, as if the woman had just asked her why she thought the sky was blue. "They're going to catch him. They have to. My mother was a good person. She spent her life fighting for people's rights, working with the police; she was one their side. They will find the person who killed her, they'll do it for her."


A/N: Feedback is more than welcome. I look forward to hearing what you think! :)