Lies We Tell Ourselves

"If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything."

Mark Twain


There was a semblance of trust when a parent has their child walk to the bus to go to school. The trust is that the kid in question would actually walk there and not go wherever the hell they feel they want to go. Truant officers were a joke for Hiccup to evade.

The only problem Hiccup had was where he'd go after he'd skip school. He could A) go back home and risk seeing his Dad or B) see if Gobber is doing anything.

Personally, he liked option B better.

Gobber's house was only a stone's throw away from the bus stop so it didn't take long before Hiccup found himself in front of an old oak door with the sign Trespassers will be offered a shot. Hiccup smiled at the familiarity of it all.

His hand, however, hovered above the door in hesitation. Whatever made him hesitate was lost to him as a voice piped up from behind him.

"Aren't you supposed to be in school lad?" Gobber's voice was very distinct with its Scottish accent.

Hiccup spun around in surprise. "It's a religious holiday today, no school."

Gobber raised an eyebrow in disbelief "What's the name?".

"Rosh Hashanah," Hiccup said with as a straight of a face as possible.

"Is that so?" Gobber knows how to see a lie, Hiccup knew, "That's next week, the 22nd."

Gobber spoke before Hiccup could respond. "Does your father know?"

"I'd be over his knee if he knew."

Gobber walked passed him, opened the door and walked in. He looked back at Hiccup and said: "Well come on then."


"Tell me the truth Hiccup," Gobber said still looking at her body.

Hiccup had a bitter taste in his mouth. "I did."

That made him face Hiccup. "I've always known when you lied Hiccup."

I got better Hiccup thought. "There's no reason for me to lie to you."

"Why would she call you though?" Astrid's voice cuts in.

"No clue." Another lie, Hiccup's starting to feel like shit. Honesty is like respect, Stoick told him once, if you want it you have to give it.

"Why didn't you call me Hiccup?" Gobber exclaimed. "Right after calling 911 did you not call me!?"

"I'm sorry, alright?" Hiccup didn't need to lie about this part though "I was tired and strung out as hell, okay?"

He didn't really want to look at Gobber anymore so he looked at Astrid who, surprisingly, was giving a sort-of sympathetic look. A look of understanding.

She saw his gaze and gave him a half-smile. Then proceeded to talk to the officer who was first on the scene.

Hiccup felt a tug on his arm as Gobber pulled him over to the side. "Don't bullshit me here," he whispered, "I know you."

"I'm not."

Gobber stared at him for a moment before saying "You owe me for this."

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Like I said I know you, you're gonna run away and hide now that everything's over."

He was wrong. Hiccup wasn't going to run away now that everything is over, it's because everything is kicking off that Hiccup wants to run away.

"I don't 'run away'. I just go away."

"Well don't," Hiccup gave him a look, "If I'm to cover for you then you need to stay put."

Hiccup sighed and said, "What the hell would I do here anyway?"

"Consult," Gobber responded instantly "Maybe even start up a private thing if you get bored."

"Stoick's thing eh?" Hiccup knew Stoick had started going private. He also knew that Stoick abandoned it.

"I bought the place from him, you know?" Gobber confided "Left the signup and everything."

"Why would you do that?"

"For the day you'd come back and take his place."

Hiccup thought for a moment. If there was one person in this world that he loves it'd be Gobber. Besides, he owes him.

"How long?"

"A year at the minimum."

"Would I have to speak to him?"

"Not unless you want to."

"Okay then." They shook on it as well.

"I need someone to help me get settled in there. I mean, I might actually have to live in there for awhile."

Gobber laughed and said, "I got an idea!" Before yelling "Astrid! Come over here!"

Hiccup got a laugh out of that, though it looked as if the joke was lost on Astrid.


Astrid didn't necessarily hate Hiccup, she just doesn't like being his personal goddam chauffeur. This was the third time she had to drive him somewhere in her car and he hasn't even the decency to have said thank you yet.

"You know you could say thank you." She rudely voiced her thoughts, Astrid knew she was being rude but honestly the time for manners was over.

"Thanks for driving me around." Hiccup didn't look at her.

"Where are we going?" Astrid quickly added, "What's on the 5th of Elmond road?"

"Gobber has something for me." he cryptically said.

"And that's supposed to mean something?"

"You'll see."

5th of Elmond contained multiple offices one of which was where Gobber had kept the lease on Stoick's. He was giving it to Hiccup.

"I'm not coming in if that's what you're thinking," Astrid told him as soon as they pulled up.

"Why? You don't want to know what the surprise is?"

"Just tell me, or else no more free rides." That was a scary ultimatum.

"I'm going to start doing private consulting, primarily in the detective field."

"Captain wants you to stick around eh?"

"Yeah well, he's like family," Hiccup tried his best to be convincing "you don't run away from family."

Astrid didn't respond and Hiccup figured that was the end of the conversation.

In all honesty, Hiccup didn't know what to make of Astrid. She clearly disliked him, probably because everyone dislikes him.

With the exception of Gobber, of course.

The office building was a pre-war, exposed brick building. It had a stoop in the front with a door that needed re-painting.

It looked old, something Stoick must've loved.

"Thanks for the ride," Hiccup turned to Astrid.

"My Captain required me to drive you."

"Yeah, sorry I didn't-"

"I don't care," Astrid unlocked the car, "get out."

Hiccup did as she demanded. Looking at the back of her car as she sped away. It was abundantly clear that she didn't like him.

Without knocking Hiccup used the key that Gobber gave him, entering the old building.

"Oi," a shrill voice cried out, making Hiccup jump back.

"Jesus," Hiccup breathed heavily out.

"Oh yeah? What's he got to do with you entering my fucking home without knocking?"

Hiccup got a good look at the women, she was old with grey hair. He saw that she had a hunch back with a cane to keep herself standing.

"Gobber gave me a key," Hiccup said before adding, "you know a Gobber?"

"Yeah I know Gobber you fucking-" the women stopped herself, "Oh, you're Haddock's boy."

Hiccup had a sour taste in his mouth now, "I don't go by that-"

The women continued ignoring him, "So you want the office?"

"I mean," Hiccup showed her the key, "I have a key for it, don't I?"

The women laughed at that, "I like smart asses, the name's Gothi."

"That's a weird-"

"You're named fucking Hiccup," Gothi interrupted.

"Fair play."

"Your office is on the second floor," Gothi pointed her finger to the staircase.

Hiccup went up and looked at his office door, it was a fog glass door with the words Haddock Detective Agency on it.

Ignoring that inconvenience Hiccup pushed open the door. Inside was a desk with an old leather chair. The room was on the smaller side when Hiccup turned on the lights it made the room filled with a warm glow.

It was comforting, in a weird way.

When Hiccup around the desk to sit down only to see a black cat in it. The cat looked at him with a dismissive look, if cats could give dismissive looks this would be that.

"Gothi?" Called out only to look back and see her in the doorway.

"It's a stray that likes Mr. Haddock's old office," Gothi looked at Hiccup with a gleam, "It's called toothless."

The cat meowed at its name, showing off that it did indeed have teeth.

"It has teeth," Hiccup said dumbly.

"Yeah, and you don't hiccup," with that she turned away and went back downstairs.

Hiccup and the cat looked at each other.

"You're in my seat."


To be continued.