A/N: Before we start I just want to say thank you to everyone for supporting my stories. I know this story might be hard to read at times because of the angst, heartache and slow burn, but they won't be sleeping together and all their problems disappear. They will work on rebuilding their relationship. So thanks again, I truly appreciate every single comment, they all mean so much to me and keep me writing!
"Mom."
My eyes instantly pop wide open and despite the simple fact that I know it's my son, my body scampers backward and my heart thumps widely in my chest.
"Noah," I groan through my sleep induced voice and peek over at the clock on my night stand, glowing six in the morning. "Kiddo, it's too early," I protest and fling the comforter open so my son can crawl into bed with me.
My youngest scrambles into the warmth and presses his back against my front so I can hold him close and wash away whatever fears that are haunting him right now. My fingers lazily tread through his thick hair while my lips stretch forward to kiss the back of his head gently.
"Mom."
"Hmmm," I reply even though my eyelids are growing heavy and slowly drifting closed. My mind begging to take me away into a far away land.
"How come nobody wanted to go to mom's last night?" He innocently questions provoking my arms to tighten around his scrawny frame and pull him in ever closer.
"No kiddo, it's not that. Sutton was just hurt and upset and she just wanted to be in her own bed. Then of course Harper had to copy her, because we know Harper," I lightly tease to help soothe his sorrows. "I'm pretty sure Henry was just wanting to be near his sisters and make sure they were okay, that's all. No big deal. I'm taking all four of you over there once it's actually time to wake up," I deadpan and place another reassuring kiss to his head.
"Okay."
"Noah, you know you can stay with your mom whenever you want to. Just tell us. You don't always have to follow in your sibling's footsteps. I suggest you don't anyways, because they are cranky, like all the time." My son breathes out a small laugh through his nose and squirms in closer to the warm sensation seeping from the comforter. "I love you bud, no matter what, okay?"
"I know. I love you too mom."
"Okay good, now let's sleep a few more hours before it's time to get up," I suggest and snuggle into my youngest, absorbing every second of this moment because I know in my heart I don't have too many of these cuddles left with him.
XXXXXXXXX
"Let's get a move on kids," I scream up the elaborate staircase encouraging my children to finish up whatever they may need to pack for Regina's.
Although she is renting a spacious townhome with enough bedrooms for each one of our children, the kids have never fully committed into moving their possessions over there. They usually spend Friday night to Monday morning with Regina, every weekend packing a bag for their stay. I'm not sure if they are just hoping that this divorce is temporary or maybe they are too terrified to move some of their things because then that would be admitting defeat and having to face the harsh reality.
Noah's heavy trampling down the stairs are the first set of feet I acknowledge, followed by Henry's. I peer up the long, winding staircase and watch my boys shove each other playfully while engulfed in some sort of game of chase.
"Cool it boys, we don't need another trip to the emergency room," I groan while slipping on my sneakers.
"Hey ma, can I talk to you for a minute?" My oldest nervously questions as he shrugs his backpack even higher upon his shoulder.
"Sure kid. Noah, get your shoes on," I turn my attention toward the stairs and raise my voice for the twins to hear me. "Sutton. Harper. Let's go!"
I nod toward my young man and I swear my heart breaks every time my mind processes just how tall he is now. I hate that he's slightly taller than me, it makes me long for those days when he was nestled tightly into my embrace and I could protect him from the world.
I follow my son into the kitchen and study the way his posture grows rigid and he's fumbling nervously with his backpack. I raise one eyebrow in confusion, but I wait patiently for him to come to me with his worries.
"This...this has been rough lately," he begins, his tongue stuttering over the words he's trying so desperately to communicate.
"I know kid," I sigh, but he's already cutting me off and continuing with his speech.
"I mean, it's different for me." My face contorts to match the perplexed thoughts swarming around in my brain. "I have three homes now. I mean...my dad is Sutton, Harper and Noah's dad too, but he's really only my third parent. I just...they...they don't have to be split up between three homes now. I'm seventeen and by next year, none of this will matter anymore because I'll be in college, but right now...this is hard." My son's broad shoulders slump from his admission, the pain and hurt from finally admitting the truth consuming him whole.
My mouth immediately forms a sorrowful frown because, god, this is never what I wanted for my children. Never in a million years would I have ever thought this is where my life would have turned out. This is not the path I ever thought possible for Regina and I, but here we are and I don't know how I'm going to survive this.
"Kid, I," I choke on my own horrible excuse because there's nothing I can say or do to make this any easier on my son. I want to take all his pain away and protect him from the animosity, but I can't...I don't know how. "I'm so sorry."
"I know ma. I know you're hurt too and you're doing your best. I...I know the difference between your smile and your fake brave face," he mutters mostly to himself causing my heart to plummet to the pit of my stomach before the damn organ crashes brutally into my intestines.
"Henry," I grip his shoulder and squeeze some love into his tense muscle. "What can I do to help you?"
"I-I...I'm seventeen...can I just stay here? Do I have to continue going back and forth between three houses? It's so exhausting," he pleads, his dark green eyes full of pain and...exhaustion, like he just confessed.
"What about your dad and mom? They are going to want to spend time with you? They're going to miss you."
"It's not like I'm going to ignore them. I'll still visit with them, I'm just tired over being forced to a different home every weekend. It's unfair that I'm with you during the week and then every other weekend I have to share my time between mom and dad."
"I know Henry," I squeeze his shoulder even tighter to keep myself grounded and from completely losing my mind right now. "I'm so sorry. I never wanted it to be like this." My son simply stares into my eyes, silently begging to ease some of his troubles and heartache and I can't help but cave. "Please go to your mom's today and I promise I will speak with her and your dad about coming up with something more comfortable for you, okay?"
"Alright," he complies, offering a half of a smile in return before shuffling passed me.
I take this moment alone to calm myself from the searing pain piercing my heart. The last thing I want is to cause pain for my children, but I'm not sure how to navigate through these treacherous waters. I feel as though I'm lost in an ocean of rough waters, with only a tiny raft below me and one tiny wave can send me toppling over. I could read all the books about divorce and helping your children cope, but the truth is every child is different and every child deserves an answer that best suits them.
I inhale one deep breath through my nose and exhale slowly before I exit my kitchen and fake a smile for my children. I fiddle with my keys as my feet stumble across the hardwood floors.
"Alright, Noah, do you have your uniform for karate this afternoon? Harper, you have your guitar for your lesson," I note while Noah and Harper nod along. "Alright let's hit the road."
I bend down and lift Sutton's backpack onto my shoulder and hold the door open for my kids to exit our home. Henry and Harper help Sutton down the front porch steps while Noah takes off running toward our car. I lock up the front door and sigh, feeling the dread of having to have a conversation with Regina about Henry.
XXXXXXXXX
My fingers twitch subconsciously deep within the confines of my jacket, discreet from Regina's curious eyes as we stand upon her doorstep. To a home that isn't hers, a home I shouldn't be dropping off my kids every weekend, but I do and I curse myself every day for this inevitable moment that occurs every week.
The heavy door swings up, revealing a stunned brunette as her mind tries to process what her eyes are explaining. Those mesmerizing, rich chocolate irises pop wide open while her thick lips part, as though she may have some argument ready to come pouring out.
"I told you I'd bring them," I mutter softly, encouraging her mouth to snap shut and morph into a genuine smile that she reserves just for our children.
A smile that was once only meant for my eyes before our children, before the chaos of life.
"Of course." Regina steps aside allowing our children to cross the threshold, with Sutton wobbling behind on her crutches. "Are you hungry? Did you eat breakfast?"
Regina's motherly concern steps into place from her utter shock that her children actually showed up this morning after last night. I close the door behind me and offer Sutton's backpack to my ex, who quickly takes it off my hands.
"They all ate, but umm do you think we can speak in private for a moment?" I timidly request, catching everyone's attention in the room.
All eyes are on me with skepticism etching deep lines into their faces. I can only assume Noah is optimistic for a reconciliation, while Sutton presumes a fight will occur and Harper is over analyzing every facial expression Regina and I have to offer. Henry flashes me a weak smile, knowing this has to do with him and darts up the stairs, granting Regina and I privacy.
"Of course," Regina fakes her new plastic smile that is beneficial for our children and is only ever directed at me now a days. "Children, head upstairs for a few minutes while your mother and I speak." Our kids nod and exit without any words spoken. "Would you like some coffee? I just made a full pot," she kindly offers and gestures for me to move toward the kitchen.
"That would be great, I didn't have a chance to make some this morning," I ramble, just to fill the air with something so we don't drown in the deafening silence.
I need to say something, because walking through this house feels foreign to my body. Despite the fact that it's a lovely home, well decorated and cozy from Regina's style, it isn't our home. And I hate the fact that it holds my ex wife and my children when they should be in our home, with me.
I have never stepped foot into this house and now I am reminded as to why. There is an eerie sensation tingling up the back of my spine and I just know in my heart this place isn't right. I can practically feel the gaping hole in my heart, it's spreading with each step I take further into this house and confirming that Regina has moved on and she's no longer mine.
Regina steps around me and proceeds toward her cabinets. I plead with myself not to stare at her backside as she stretches on her tiptoes to reach her coffee mugs, but apparently I'm a sucker for pure torture. I suck the corner of my lip between my teeth as my eyes crawl toward her plump bottom and it's so abundantly clear by the way my entire body flushes that I've gone far too long without sex.
My eyes suddenly wander to Regina's hands, where she prepares our coffee. I study the way she pours the vanilla creamer into a mug, knowing exactly where to stop for the perfect combination that will indefinitely awaken my taste buds. My heart sinks into the pit of my stomach, watching her prepare my coffee exactly how I like it, because she was once my wife and she knows me better than she knows herself.
"So," Regina exhales and spins around, offering the steaming cup of coffee.
I gratefully accept the beverage, my mouth curling upwards into a soft, genuine smile. I notice right away how Regina freezes, her breath hitching in her throat and forcing her lungs to stop breathing, while her eyes lock onto mine. We both are immobile, time seems to stop around us and I swear the universe just stops while too many buried feelings come clawing their way back to the surface once again.
Regina quickly shreds through the intimate moment when she spins back on her heels to busy herself with her own coffee.
"So, you wanted to speak with me?" She inquires, forcing a deep breath out of my mouth.
"Yeah, it's about Henry," I begin, encouraging my ex to turn back around to face me. Her face is suddenly stern with worry about our son, her fingers turning white from clutching her mug too tightly. "He pulled me aside this morning, he..." the words die on my tongue because as much hostility Regina and I hold against one another, I never want to hurt her with our children. "Henry doesn't want to keep going back and forth on weekends. He's seventeen now and in eight months he'll be off to college. I think he just wants to enjoy his senior year with his friends on the weekend and not have to be dragged between three different homes."
I take a chance and peek up through my eyelashes at Regina. A cold hard mask is firmly set into place and I don't think I've seen that frigidness since the night we met when she held a shovel to my head. I squirm anxiously in my seat under her intense gaze and fiddle with my coffee cup as a distraction.
"What about Neal? Will he still be visiting with him?" She questions vacantly, sending chills to run down my spine.
"I asked him and he said he will still see you guys but he doesn't want to be forced every weekend. I think he's just looking for some normalcy before he leaves for college."
"That's a piss poor excuse, he can still come here on the weekends and hang out with his friends. We live five minutes apart," Regina harshly defends, slamming down her coffee mug against the marble countertop.
"Don't get snippy with me, this isn't my fault. He came to me this morning before we left, it's not like I'm brainwashing the kid, this is how he feels," I snap, not wanting to be blamed in Regina's eyes for something else yet again.
"And you don't think Henry avoiding me on weekends is going to affect our other children?" Regina pushes herself away from the counter and stalks toward me like a predator seeking out its weak prey. "If you allow Henry to stop visiting, don't you think the girls will follow in his footsteps and soon Noah as well?"
She folds her arms defiantly across her chest and scowls, informing me that I just started a battle and she's ready to fight. I inhale sharply and breath out the longest breath of annoyance.
"No, I don't believe that. I think the other three will still want to see you every weekend. Besides they don't have a choice, they are kids."
"That's very comforting Emma."
"Jeez Regina, you act like I'm forcing Henry to stay away. It has nothing to do with you, he wants the same for Neal as well. He's almost an adult and I think we should allow him to make this decision on his own. I guarantee he will still visit all the time."
Regina shakes her head, her index finger and thumb firmly pinching away the stress building at the bridge of her nose. I know Regina, and I know she's absolutely crushed, Henry is her baby boy and always will be. They always had a special bond, since the first time he peed on her and it's a beautiful relationship that I always adored. I know she's hurting and I know I'm going to receive the brunt of her heartache.
"Henry!" Regina screams through her townhome, startling me in my boots. I sip my coffee quietly and wait for our son to make his presence known.
"Uh, yeah?" He peeks his head around the corner, slightly wincing knowing what's to come.
"Come in here please," Regina orders, "we have some things we need to discuss." Henry nods appearing awfully nervous as he crosses over into the kitchen. "Sit," she instructs, pointing to the stool in front of the island and he obeys immediately. "Henry," her voice lowers and softens all at once for her little prince. "You don't want to come on the weekends anymore? Did last night truly upset you that much? Because I can assure you, Fiona is not my girlfriend."
"No mom, that has nothing to do with it. I-I just am so sick of being shuffled between three homes. It's so annoying. I hate it," he grumbles with those sorrowful eyes begging up at his other mother for pity.
That face and those eyes always were Regina's weakness. She visibly softens right before my very eyes and frowns in response to our son's plea. My ex steps around her counter and pads across the kitchen floor until she's standing directly in front of our son. She cups his chin gently and slowly guides his face to peer up at her.
"Henry, I won't ever force you to come here on weekends, but you have to understand, not seeing you every day kills me," she whispers for just them, but I hear it all and those words stab through my heart like a jagged piece of glass. "It's bad enough I have to wait five days to see you, but now, knowing I won't even have those two measly days on the weekend...well it just hurts."
Henry rips his chin away as if his mother just burned him with a sizzling iron. His dark brows pinch angrily together, but all I see is hurt in his eyes.
"Yeah, because when you lived with us you were always around, right?" He scoffs, his upper lip twitching into a dangerous snarl.
"Henry," she breathes as though she was going to scold him, but her heart just wasn't in it anymore. "I was there to kiss you goodnight every evening," she argues, but her voice is wavering under our son's venomous glare.
"That doesn't mean you were there. We hardly saw you during the week, even Saturday's are split between work and home. The only day we actually see you are Sunday's, so why should it matter if I'm here on weekends or not?"
"Because, you are my son and I still want to spend time with you."
"Whatever," he mumbles and forcefully pushes back his stool, generating a cringeworthy shriek against the floor. Our son stands tall, taller than either of us and stomps toward the staircase.
"Henry Daniel!" Regina shouts, instantly immobilizing our moody teenager. "We are not finished." Henry spins around abruptly and stands rigidly in the doorway, impatiently waiting for Regina to continue on. "Enough with the attitude! I don't know who you think you are, but you will not continue with this back talk. Do you understand me?" She growls and folds her arms over her chest as an intimidation tact, but I know it's to protect herself and keep her body from falling into pieces upon this very floor.
"Yes," he mutters under his breath and falls silent, inspiring Regina's foot to tap murderously against the cold wood. "I'm sorry," he mumbles knowing that's what Regina is waiting for.
"I mean it Henry. I will not tolerate this behavior anymore."
"Okay," he breathes expressing his annoyance and frustrations. Regina doesn't add on anything else so our son takes this as his cue to leave.
"Just give him some time Regina. You know he loves you. All the kids adore you, they just...it's hard for them," I softly defend, but even I hear the uncertainty in my voice because I have no clue as to what I am doing.
"I don't see them snapping at you and refusing to spend time with you," she quickly retorts, lashing out on me just like I expected.
"That's because I'm with them twenty-four-seven. They aren't stupid Regina, they understand completely why we split."
"Here we go again Emma, keep blaming me. This is exactly why our children are against me right now."
"Jesus Regina, I'm not forcing our children to hate you! Stop making me out to be the bad guy," I bellow, raising my voice louder than I initially anticipated.
"I can't! You've already painted me as the villain in this situation," she matches my volume and grips her biceps unbearably tight. "I should have never allowed the children to stay with you Monday through Friday."
I roll my eyes and step closer into her personal space, shaking with rage from her ignorance. "Oh right, because you have so much time on your hands for them during the week. What's the point of them being here while you are at work? At least when they are at home they are with me and I can be there for them!"
Regina's eyes flutter closed while she takes a few calming breathes. "Go Emma. I'm done arguing with you."
"Fine," I mumble and quickly bolt out of her house to escape yet another argument that will spoil my mood for the rest of the weekend.
XXXXXXXXX
"Well this sucks," Neal chuckles into the phone, but it's a sad laugh filled with heartache. "I mean, to be honest, I expected this. I knew it was only a matter of time before Henry stopped visiting, I'm actually surprised it hasn't been sooner," he admits through a deep groan.
"That's because you have his dirt bike held hostage at your place. Don't think I don't know about your tricks," I tease causing Neal to laugh an honest, heartfelt chuckle.
"Touché Ems. I'm really surprised he doesn't want to even visit Regina though. And I'm gonna be totally honest here, when you two split I thought for sure our kid was gonna live with her."
"I know," I sigh heavily and slump further into the comfort of my couch, aimlessly picking at the blanket draping over my legs. "I think he saw how hurt I was and how quickly Regina left that he is just placing the blame on her. I tried to explain things to him as best as I could, but he's seventeen."
"Honestly Ems, until someone is in that situation for themselves, I don't think they really can sympathize. It's too complicated."
"Yeah," my fingers pick at a loose string and will myself to stay strong and keep those pesky little tears away for just one night.
"Hey, so I'm really sorry I missed Sutton's game. I texted her and told her I had an important meeting about my new building. I'm so excited for you guys to see this new design, Ems it's breathtaking," he proudly divulges and I can hear his mouth cracking into a bright smile.
"You were always an amazing architect, I'm sure the kids will love to see your latest creation." I smile to myself and pull the blanket even higher to smoother away the dull ache of heartbreak. "She understood though, no worries. You make all her other games."
I sigh heavily and continue on with the story, explaining all about Sutton's unfortunate incident and everything that took place last night. We proceed to chit chat, mostly because I'm bored and alone. I always hate when my family isn't home, as much as I should be enjoying this time to myself, I can't stand listening to the obnoxious silence that lingers in the air. I almost crave the sounds of my kids arguing from upstairs.
After I hang up with Neal, my phone begins to ring with an unexpected caller. "Hello?"
"Hey girl," Ivy's drawls and I can tell she's distracted by something on her end, most likely work related just like her partner.
"Hey Ivy."
"So, Regina has the kids tonight, right?" She inquires while the ruffling noise of papers turning fill the background.
"Yeah," I slowly reply anticipating a demand that surely I don't want to partake in.
"Good, let's go out. It's been awhile."
"Ivy, please-"
"Shut up, I'll be at your place in ten minutes, tops. Be ready," and with that, she hangs up on me, never allowing me a choice in the matter.
I groan and complain to nobody but myself as I throw the blanket off my body and trudge grumpily up the stairs to make myself more presentable. Workout leggings and an oversized hoodie isn't exactly socially acceptable at the bars Ivy insists on.
I work on autopilot, showering, dressing and even styling my hair, something I haven't done in quite sometime. Between four kids and my part time job, I just can't seem to ever find enough time in the day to actually take care of myself. My kids have always been well dressed and groomed to perfection, while I look like Miss Hannigan from Annie; ruffled hair, sloppily dressed and on the brink of insanity.
God, no wonder Regina lost interest in me...
I admit, I may have let myself go, so to speak, but I wasn't fully conscious of the fact until recently. When the twins were born, Regina and I agreed that I would stay at home with the kids, while she worked. At this point I still had enough energy to properly take care of myself. When Noah was born, I was at home all day with the twins and an infant and there simply wasn't time to style my hair or even take a nice long shower. Some days, I didn't even have a chance to shower, but Regina was working so much that it didn't bother me. It was just me and my four kids around the house, nobody to impress.
So, I was a stay at home mom of four kids, all under the age of six, until Noah started first grade. By that time, I was about ready to rip my hair out and I needed something to do during the day while my kids were all at school. I found a part time job at a dentist office, that didn't interfere with drop offs or pick ups from school. At least this gave me some motivation to shower and dress more appealing than workout clothes all day. However, Regina still didn't seem to notice my appearance at all.
"Emma!" I blink away my thoughts and take a deep breath before meeting Ivy downstairs. "Damn girl, you look hot tonight," she compliments, for once pulling her face away from the small screen displayed in front of her.
"Thanks...so this dress is alright then?" I inquire, neurotically tugging at the hem of my dress in fear my ass might be hanging out.
"Skin tight, black leather dress? Yes, that's perfect for the bar I picked out tonight," she deadpans but there's a ghost of an evil smirk curling at the corner of her mouth. My friend reaches out, her fingers lifting the ends of my soft spirals. "I like the curls, I haven't seen these in quite some time," she insinuates with one perfect eyebrow creeping up toward her hairline.
"Yes...well...I needed this," I murmur and shove her toward the door before she has a chance to hassle me some more.
XXXXXXXXX
"Thank you," Ivy seductively purrs to the handsome waiter as he drops off our drinks. The muscular man with dark eyes and even darker hair smiles broadly before his eyes cast down, suddenly becoming awfully shy. I roll my eyes and drag my Long Island closer so I can suck up as much of the drink as humanly possible in one gulp. "So," Ivy chirps, my eyes flicking toward hers and noticing the waiter has vanished. "How are you doing?"
I roll my eyes again and keep sucking the alcohol through the straw as though it's my oxygen to breathe in this dark and dingy club. Ivy's eyes are on me, judging, examining and somewhat impressed with my ability to drink. I slurp until my straw is screeching with just air bubbles left and I push my empty glass toward the middle of the table.
"How do you think?"
"Talk to me, please."
"What do you want me to say?"
"Emma, I know you two are hurting," her hand reaches out, but because Ivy has never been the most affection person, she pulls back and rests her hands upon the table in front of her. "I understand that you probably think I'm not here for you, because I've known Regina longer, but that's not true. We are going on seventeen years of friendship now, you're my best friend too and I'm worried about you."
"You should be," I muse and make direct eye contact with the waiter, silently pleading for him to come back with another drink.
"So, talk to me. Tell me what's going on," she implores with the most heartfelt expression I think I have ever seen grace this woman's face.
I sigh heavily and fiddle with my fingertips as a distraction. "I need to ask you something and if we are as good of friends as you say, then please be honest." She nods and sips her martini, waiting for me to proceed. "Is Regina officially with Fiona?"
Ivy's face scrunches in either distaste or disbelief, but I'm not too sure just yet. She slowly sets down her glass and shakes her short loose curls all around her head.
"As far as I know, no, they are not together. Why do you ask? Did something happen?" She sternly questions as her body leans just a smidge closer into the table between us.
"She brought her to Sutton's volleyball game last night. I mean...seriously? That's...it's..."
"Disrespectful."
"Thank you!" I happily agree and slump back further into the leather seat behind me.
My friend fiddles with the stem of her glass as she mulls over this new piece of information. Her eyes are cold, almost vacant while she becomes lost in thought and I just watch her closely until she's ready to share what's on her mind.
"I'm actually surprised Regina would do something like that, but I believe since she did bring her, than she must truly believe in her mind that Fiona is only a friend. There's just no way Regina would bring a date to her daughter's game, that's not like her," she defends while the waiter approaches and drops off another drink for me.
I smile grateful and wait for Ivy to order another round as well before I speak again.
"But she's screwing her," I lamely protest and pull my drink close to my chest. My lips immediately surround the straw and begin sucking, knowing I need this liquid courage to guide me through this topic of conversation.
"Well that's true," Ivy cheerfully replies, causing my stomach to recoil.
"Thanks for the empathy asshole."
"Listen Emma, I'm going to explain to you how Regina works."
"Oh, because I didn't know everything about my wife for the last seventeen years, right?" I disapprovingly mock, but Ivy chooses to ignore my childish behavior.
"Regina has never been good at being alone. The minute she is single, she latches onto someone and fucks her problems away. That's who she is and how she has always operated."
"She does not 'fuck her problems away'," I use air quotes to stress my blatant mockery of the accusation and roll my eyes yet again.
"Okay Emma, lets break this down." Ivy slides her drink out of the way and straightens her posture. "High school, Graham, did she ever tell you about him?" I nod and stare into those big brown eyes, terrified I might not know the whole story. "She dated Graham all through high school. They were in love and inseparable until he moved to Minnesota to become a sheriff," she huffs out her annoyance while I exhale a sigh of relief because I knew all of that. "Enter Jeff, who she continued to sleep with constantly even though he was bat shit crazy, just to ease her troubles about missing Graham, until Robin came along. You know the history of Robin...enter you," she points her finger and smirks maliciously like she just received a card in poker that's her ticket to the winning hand. "She was crushed, devastated about Robin's affair and what did she do? Fuck you to ease her troubles...correct?"
"We were so much more-"
"It doesn't matter what you became, she slept with you to calm the torment her heart was going through. Then you guys broke up, and what did she do? She slept with Robin to stop the ache in her heart. Now you two are near the end of a divorce and what is she doing?"
I stare dumbfounded by my friend's theory and boldness behind her impression of my ex. Her eyes grow wide and her eyebrows skyrocket, while she waits for me to answer. My nose twitches in distaste as I force out those gruesome words.
"Sleeping with Fiona to fill the void," I grumble under my breath before closing my lips around my straw and finishing off my drink.
"That's right. She doesn't love Fiona. They aren't in a relationship. When Regina is lonely, she uses the woman. I'm not saying that it's right, but I just want you to see it for what it is. Nothing more," she stresses as her hand finally reaches across the table and lands upon mine for moral support.
"You sure?"
"I guarantee. I am even willing to bet Fiona caught Regina outside of work and tagged along without much of Regina's approval. I know she's been interested in Regina for quite some time now, but Regina has never really given her the time of day until recently, but it's not what you are thinking," she reassures me with a loving tap to my hand. "How about we find you some fun tonight, huh?" Ivy pulls away from my hand and glances all around the room for a suitor.
"No, no. Please, just thinking about touching someone else makes me physically nauseous," I groan and bury my face into my arms, because truthfully I don't trust myself not to burst into tears right here in a crowded bar.
