Hm. Chapter 3 … odd, this started out as a maybe two-shot.
I'm just gonna say the disclaimer from the previous chapter applies to all future counterparts, including this one, kay?
Also, this story takes place in the future, I guess, when Sasuke's back at the village and they're all officially Chunin. Not sure if rating will change.
Thanks for reviews!
-x-
Sakura checked over the details in her mind to make double sure everything would work out right. The party, the group decided, should be a surprise for no particular reason other than Naruto and Sasuke didn't know about it yet. Clandestinely Sakura was glad they didn't know, because if they did they'd want to help, and when Naruto and Sasuke help no good can come out of it. Their assistance no doubt turns to some sort of disaster. The only thing they could do successfully is a mission, and even then, together they wreak devastating havoc with their intense jutsu.
So far, the distribution of tasks amongst teammates was fairly agreeable:
Ino was cooking, because everyone said she had a gift for it. Also, whenever Sakura cooked for Naruto he ended up losing her food somehow, the idiot. Ino happened to mention something about a tarpaulin-like structure they could use for cover in case it rains. The weatherman said there'd be light showers.
Ino had initially been a candidate for music supplies because she received a flute for Christmas last year. That was dismissed when everyone learned she threw out the flute because it had holes in it.
Sai was in charge of extra snacks and Shikamaru volunteered to help him carry them, hoping that he wouldn't have to do anything else. Along with Hinata, Sai was also in charge of bringing appropriate decorations, and since neither of them knew exactly what that meant they settled on balloons and streamers.
Lee, Kiba and Neji were in charge of preparing the grounds for the party—clearing out corpses, covering bloodstains, cutting the grass, planting paper bombs in case anyone more ninja came to attempt Sasuke's assassination—the usual.
Kakashi, despite usually hating responsibility, was outraged when he learnt that he hadn't been assigned anything so Sakura quickly gave him the opportunity to bring along supplies for games—and not childish ones, she was quick to add, since Kakashi had a mindset that believed they were all still academy students.
Tenten and Shino were dismissed because Sakura kind of forgot about them, what with being forgettable people in her life and all. Also Tenten's breasts were growing at an alarming rate and this angered Sakura so much she was tempted to slap them, so it was best if Tenten stayed away from her.
Now she was waiting on Kakashi, again, as everyone set up for the party. Hinata and Sai were putting up decorations perfectly, and happened to bring along little lanterns to light up the sky when it got darker which Sakura couldn't have picked out better herself. Unfortunately, she was too pissed at Kakashi to let this make her happy.
"Damnit, where the hell is that fool?" she groused under her breath, venting her frustration by kicking a small stone into a tree and accidentally breaking the tree in half. She was tempted to grab a nearby boulder and take a massive bite out of it just for the sake of releasing tension when piercing, exaggerated wails burnt her eardrums.
She turned to see Ino sprinting towards her, tears streaming from her eyes at an alarming rate. Alarming because Sakura wasn't good at comforting people. "S-Sa-Sa-Sakura—" she took a deep breath, "it's awful!" Ino sobbed melodramatically, collapsing into her friend's reluctantly open arms and weeping into her shirt, letting it soak up her drool and boogers.
Sakura sighed. "What's wrong, Ino?"
Ino released her friend and began wiping her eyes, fixed on the ground. "Well… you know how I was supposed to cook? F-for the party?"
"Yes…"
"Um. I tried making a cake, but when I put it in the oven the candles melted and got absolutely ruined!" Sakura tried to figure out if she was being serious or not. "A-and then, I ran out of ingredients to make another one, so I—" she sniffed, "I tried to make packet cookies instead b-but the box caught fire in the oven and a fire started, and now I can't go home to make more food because I destroyed all our supplies for the next few weeks and also my parents are angry at me!" Sakura sensed another wave of sobs coming on and tried to shush her consolingly, feeling very sorry for Ino's parents and for the now food-less party.
"Um, it's okay—Chouji's bringing some snacks along, so it's okay, really Ino. Don't cry." Ino continued to heave the waterworks down Sakura's chest, making the other kunoichi uncomfortable.
"There, there…"
"I'M SO SOOOOOOOOORRY WAHAHAHA… AAAAAAAHAHA—"
"I said there there!" Sakura snapped, slapping Ino across the face, then once in the gigantic boob for good measure. She proceeded to grouch about Ino's firm breasts and scowl at her own slowly developing ones, becoming even more pissed. "Ino, seriously it's fine," she assured the other girl, who was rubbing her sore chest. "Just go – go set up the tarpaulin."
Ino nodded emphatically and dragged her feet towards where Kiba was standing literally doing nothing with drool trailing out the corner of his mouth, asking him for help. Suddenly someone's fingers were clasped around Sakura's neck. "Don't say a word," Kakashi breathed into her ear heatedly, purposely making her scream.
Sakura tried to kick him away but he was already gone, paling and trying to regain her composure. He reappeared beside her with a bored look on his face. She growled. "Why did you do that?"
Kakashi shrugged and Naruto giggled into his palm, trying to cover his amusement and Sasuke promptly elbowed him in the ribs.
Wait, back up.
"Naruto! Sasuke!" she squeaked in surprise. "What are you doing here?"
They both glanced at each other in confusion, wondering why they wouldn't be welcome. "I invited them," Kakashi answered.
Sakura ground her teeth together, adopting a look of pure disbelief. "What the hell Kakashi! It's a surprise party!"
"Surprise party? For who?" Naruto asked.
"For us, obviously," Sasuke remarked monotonously. "Though it's not much of a surprise anymore."
"How was I supposed to know that?" the Jonin asked softly.
"Because I told you! Specifically! We all knew!" Sakura yelled, waving her arms about and causing the rest of the gathering to glance at the scene unfolding.
Kakashi hushed her with calm, shushing motions. "Sakura, please, you know shouting makes me nervous." She glared so hard her eyes could have melted. "I didn't hear you," he defended lamely.
"I left a post-it saying 'don't tell Naruto and Sasuke about the surprise party on Thursday' on the inside of your perverted book," she seethed, taking her tone down a notch.
"Which one?"
"The orange one, of course!"
"I finished that one," he replied.
"You were reading it yesterday!"
"…I finished it yesterday."
Sakura slapped him across the face with the nearest thing she could find, which didn't do much because it was just a flimsy piece of paper filled with notes. "Kakashi. Before you left you were sure to clarify that yes, the party we planned was indeed a surprise one."
He briefly averted his gaze from Ino's ass. "…Pardon me?"
Sakura made odd grunting noises, smacking her palm across her forehead vehemently until it glowed red. "Just. Go."
"Where?" he asked like a lost child.
"I don't know – over there!" she cried, flapping her arms towards the general area of not here.
"…But there's nobody else over there. I'll get lonely," he rebutted sadly.
"Then go to someone else, I don't care, as long as you're away from me or I swear I will shove that tree trunk so far up your ass you'll sprout leaves from your head!"
Kakashi sighed forlornly in defeat. "Okay. Sasuke, Naruto, come on. Let's go over… there," he mumbled, flouncing over to Hinata and Sai for lack of better company. Nobody followed him.
"Sorry Sakura," Naruto apologised. "We can leave if you like."
Sakura's first thought was to just let them stay, but she realised they hadn't actually seen anything other than the decorations yet and clamped her mouth shut with an audible click. "Actually, how about you just go do something else until we're done? We'll send someone after you. There may still be a satisfactory surprise here."
Naruto beamed. "Okay, sounds cool! Cya later!" He gripped Sasuke's hand and tugged him along towards Konoha, the Uchiha in tow not bothering to object since Naruto would probably just laugh.
Sakura took a few calming breaths, jumping when Ino tapped her on the shoulder. "I brought the tarp," she chittered happily, previous woe evaporated, gesturing towards a flat black infrastructure with a waterproof blanket attached.
One with holes in it.
"There are holes in it," Sakura noted blankly.
"Oh yeah. I thought I should cut some in so we could tell when it stopped raining," Ino said proudly. "It was my idea."
"I could have guessed that much, thank you," Sakura frowned, trying to understand what state of mind Ino must have been in when she did this. "See, the problem with this is that since there are holes in it, the rain will go through said holes and wet the food, decorations and people huddling beneath it."
Ino's face dropped as she considered this. "Oh," she mouthed. The pair stared at the ruined tarp until Ino clapped her friend on the back. "Wait, I got this," she declared, skipping over to the fabric and grabbing both corners. She flipped it over, grinning at her friend. "See, if I turn it inside out, like this, then the holes will be gone, and – oh, oh no. No never mind." She shrugged helplessly.
Sakura held back a wave of exasperated tears.
