John opened the front door. Mrs. Hudson, the landlady, left it open for him between four and six. She was thoughtful like that. He ran up the stairs to the first floor and pulled out his keys. He had a habit of twisting the door handle before putting his key in to make sure he had locked it prior to leaving. The door gave in.
Shit, I forgot to lock it last night.
He near jumped out of his skin seeing the boy sitting in his arm chair with his legs crossed, admiring the view.
"You're early." John barely got out.
"So are you. Had a lift?"
"As a matter of fact, I did." John said hanging up his coat. He slid his shoes off. "Doesn't explain why you're here. I said five."
"I'm done at three." Sherlock shrugged. "Got bored."
"How did you get in, the door was locked?"
"Landlady let me in. Told her I was your cousin. Mother's side. Second marriage, a bit hush hush. She's quite nice. Even made me tea." Sherlock pointed to the cup on the side table.
"That's Mrs. Hudson for you." John sighed. "Give her a good bit of gossip and she'll forget she's not your housekeeper, start making you food, cleans the flat from time to time."
"I'd best keep my ears open then." Sherlock said opening the day's newspaper.
"Erm... You say that like you intend to move in."
"Of course." Sherlock said still scanning the newsprint. John smiled and looked away.
"You cannot be serious."
"You need someone to share the rent. End of the month, do you believe you could honestly afford this place for much longer living off trust-fund money from a deceased bank manager and school-teacher?"
"I-"
"Don't worry I didn't gather that myself. Like you said, Mrs. Hudson has the gift of gab." Sherlock grinned and folded the newspaper perfectly and placed it back on the side table, he grabbed his cup and saucer and took a sip. "How about it?" He said lifting his eyebrows to convey sincerity.
"No. Not just no, fuck no. God, hell no." John started to panic. "You can come round here, say it's after school club, piss around with your video games or whatever the fuck teens do nowadays, but you're not being my flatmate." John thought of at least twenty million different reasons why it was a horrible idea, most of which being: he'd be thrown in prison for having fucked a minor. "What would your brother say?"
"Good riddance." Sherlock shrugged. "He thinks I'm an annoyance anyhow."
"What would you be telling people then?"
"Living with my cousin, John." Sherlock looked at John as if he was stupid.
"And to your brother? How would you be explaining you moving in with a university student? Hm? He'd know something was up."
"He honestly wouldn't give a flying fuck if I moved out, would prefer it even."
"Yeah, that's what your warped little teen mind thinks. He may not seem to care, but he does, trust me."
"Psh, you don't know my brother." Sherlock scoffed.
"Blood runs thick. He'd be the one to chop my dick off and flush it down the toilet if he found out what I did to you."
"Hm." Sherlock thought it over. "Perhaps."
"See, this is an absolutely terrible idea. So don't even give it a moment's thought."
"Could just say I'm moving in with my school-mate Raz who lives in the student housing. Keep some of my things there. You know." Sherlock shrugged. "It is pretty much fool proof."
"Yeah, except, I don't want you shacking up with me. There goes your little plan, right out the window." John whistled and mimed a piece of paper flying out the open window.
"You forget that I hold valuable information and surmountable evidence that you raped me." Sherlock shrugged once more. "So... there."
John knew when he was beat. Unfortunately he was at the mercy of a fourteen year old little rich boy.
"How are you paying your share?"
"Oh, my allowance is more than enough to cover any of my expenses. Plus Mycroft will no longer have to take up my living expenses so that money will be mine as well."
"How much are we talking?" John was interested.
"Enough."
"Well fuck! I obviously have no say, when you moving in roomie?" John threw his arms into the air in defeat.
"Tomorrow, if that's fine with you."
"Never would be fine with me, but hey! Tomorrow works too."
"Good. I don't have much. I'll purchase what I need, perhaps help with the décor."
"What's wrong with the décor?"
"There isn't any." Sherlock was quite right. There was an arm chair, side table, and a telly.
"Could use another chair... Last flatmate took his shit with him when he ran off. Didn't come with much. Rooms are furnished though."
"I saw."
"Take it... you've been through my room." John sighed.
"Yep. Kind of a pigsty." John frowned. "Oh no, I prefer it. Gives me more to look at."
"Wouldn't have gathered that from the state of your bedroom last night."
"Yes well the place of rest should be a simple place. The less stimulus, the better."
"All right Confucius Junior." John chuckled. "Lucky my ex-flatmate isn't here, he's a cop you know."
"Yeah, Mrs. Hudson seemed rather fond of George."
"Greg."
"Right. He's tall, dark, and handsome with a cleft chin and footballer physique." Sherlock huffed. "I know the type."
"Greg's a good guy. He just... doesn't always make the best choices. Not with women anyway." John sighed.
"So he broke your heart then?"
"He didn't break my heart." John looked at Sherlock with disbelief. "You don't know the first thing about our friendship."
"Sure I do. You grew up with him, spent endless summers together, went on camp-outs. People thought you two were brothers. You weren't quick to correct them. You fancy him. He's gone. No threat to me."
"A threat to you? Fuck Sherlock. I'm not going to be your boyfriend."
"Companion, partner, lover, call it whatever. Don't even have to use names." Sherlock looked up at the ceiling. "Call us flatmates even, if it helps you sleep better at night."
"Bet you know about my night terrors as well."
"Your what?" Sherlock looked over at him.
"Oh well... Thought Mrs. Hudson would've... yeah you being my fictional cousin you would have known." He looked at Sherlock who looked confused. "I wake up in the middle of the night screaming, hope it doesn't bother you."
"I play the violin when I'm thinking. Sometimes I don't talk for hours on end. Would that bother you?"
"Wouldn't mind if you started that now... the not talking bit."
"Potential flatmates should know the worst about each other."
"Potential?" John asked confused.
"While you're entirely on board with the idea, I still must mull it over. If I'm certain, I'll move in tomorrow. If not, perhaps you'll never see me again." Sherlock grinned and stood up. "Well I'd better get going, pleasure seeing you again John." He shook John's hand and made his way for the front door. "By the way, I'm clean you know. Didn't have to have that condom." Sherlock said turning around.
"How do you know I'm not?"
"Just do. Next time. Bare." Sherlock growled the word 'bare'.
"Nex-next time. You said perhaps I'd never see you again. I'd rather like that."
"No you wouldn't." Sherlock winked and left the flat in a quick sweep.
"The little fuck." John huffed.
"Heard that!" Sherlock responded in a high pitched voice from down the stairs.
"GOOD YOU LITTLE FUCK!" John shouted.
"John!"
"Oh! I am so sorry Mrs. Hudson!" Mrs. Hudson opened the door and looked at John with disgust.
"The language from your mouth young man." She shook her head. "You best be nice to your cousin." She had brought some biscuits up and set the plate on the kitchen counter top. "Be nice having the young man round here, seemed real sweet."
"Yeah well, you don't know the first thing about him... Wait. How'd you know he was moving in?"
"He told me! We had ourselves a nice chat. Told me bout your Aunt, shame her marriage didn't work out. Poor thing's practically an orphan. You know... without the whole dead parents bit. Oh... dear I'm sorry John I didn't mean..." Mrs. Hudson put a hand to her mouth.
"It's fine Mrs. Hudson." John looked down.
"I really need to watch what I'm sayin. Starting to slip, old age and all."
"Mrs. Hudson, you are far from old."
"Oh don't go trying to kiss up to me. I'm an old hag and you know it."
"You are a vibrant star that burns brighter with age."
"Right before I burn out, thank you John." She chortled and gave John a pat on the shoulder. "Having two young men above my head, it's going to do a number on my wrinkles."
"I'll try my best to keep him under control." John was concerned at the thought. "We'll hardly even be here during the day." He thought that sounded much better.
"Well I'd better be getting back to my shows. Came up during the advertisements."
"Back on the soaps again?"
"I know... my one weakness." She admitted. Mrs. Hudson had a nasty habit of becoming highly addicted to several soaps at once. Then she'd lose track, stop watching them all together, and then kick herself later for not watching them when she picked them up again. It was a vicious cycle but one she was not about to quit.
John's mobile vibrated in his pocket. He pulled it out.
Decided I'd move in after all -SH
John gritted his teeth.
You decided that the moment the landlady said there was a room available.
True. Well I have a long list of preparations, so I will see you tomorrow. -SH
Yeah, anal preparations. The rat bastard.
BTW, I didn't mean anal preparations. -SH
"Course you didn't." John said to his phone. He threw it on to his chair and went to his bedroom behind the kitchen. He fell on to his bed and sighed. "I'm being held hostage by a boy-slut."
A genius boy-slut.
