A/N: I have basically tripled the length of this chapter. I have filled in a lot of details between scenes and changed some small parts of the story. In the last chapter, I had Shinji and Asuka get closer then I originally had them, the purpose was to make the pain Asuka goes through because of Shinji ignoring her more credible. Which in turn, causes her to be more open with her feelings for Shinji. I've had this chapter done for probably about 2 months now, and yet I'm still not happy with it. But at work I'm told that I am entirely way to hard on myself when it comes to critiquing my designs, so maybe I am with my writing too... But I doubt it. Enjoy.
-Beck
Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion, If I did, I would be flogging an 'arrest-me-red' Ferrari F430 Scuderia on some back country road instead of writing this fucking disclaimer.
'thoughts'
"speech, sounds"
"Good advice is something a man gives when he is too old to set a bad example." - Francois de La Rochefoucauld
Chapter 3 – What Is And What Should Never Be
Asuka awoke as her senses were assaulted by the smells emanating from the the kitchen. She slowly sat up and rubbed her good eye as she arched her back and stretched her left arm. Her taught, round breasts stretched the material to its limits; her hard nipples received stimulation by the tight material trying desperately to contain her impressive endowments. She cupped both of her breasts and gave a soft squeeze as she bit her lower lip to restrain a moan. She released her left breast and ran her hand down her flat, tight stomach. Her hand slipped into her panties - red bikini of coarse - and encased her
honey dripping mound as she suppressed another moan. Her middle finger dipped into her glistening slit, her body shuttered at the attention her most intimate place was receiving. The tip of her finger brushed against her clit as she let out a soft moan.
"Oh Shinji!" Moaned Asuka.
"Yes Asuka?" Asked Shinji.
Her eye opened to the size of a midgets fist and her jaw dropped like the ass of stripper working her way through college. She quickly removed her hands as Shinji crossed the threshold of her room carrying a tray of food. Asuka adjusted herself as Shinji lowered the tray onto her lap. The heat from the tray wasn't doing her any favors.
"W-Whats this for?" Asuka asked, trying to get a grip on herself.
"I just wanted to do something nice for you Asuka." Shinji said while desperately trying not to stare at the scantly clad goddess.
Asuka noticed him checking her out, but she remembered that she had promised not to call him a pervert. She then noticed that he had dark circles under his eyes.
"You look like hell!"
"I-I didn't sleep much last night." Apparently in Shinji's mind, much is another word for none.
"Didn't like sleeping next to me?" Asuka teased.
"Asuka, sleeping next to you was amazing! It's the first time in a long time that I haven't felt all alone." Asuka gave Shinji a small smile. "I just felt so bad for what Toji did to you." Shinji lowered his head.
"Well of coarse it was amazing!" Smirked Asuka as she put her hands on her hips. "Look, it really wasn't your fault Shinji, I just... well," Asuka started fiddling with her breakfast, not really wanting to continue. "I was just expecting you to stick up for me." Asuka said with a small frown
"Awe, did little Asuka want Shinji to be her protector." Misato teased from the doorway.
"Piss off Misato, it's to early to put up with your crap." Asuka mentally slapped herself. "Wait, how long have you been eavesdropping?" Said the black eyed German
"Long enough to know that your going to get an exam from Ritsuko."
"N-Nothing happened Misato!" Stammered Shinji.
"You seriously think that we would have sex without being boyfriend and girlf... Um, I mean with this loser?!" Asked Asuka.
"Ok, ok, I believe you. But you two are not allowed to share the same bed until you are both eighteen. Is that understood?" Scolded Misato while waiving her finger.
"Yes Misato." They both said dejectedly.
"But what if it we slept next to each other out in the living room?" Asuka asked.
"Are you sure you would want to sleep next to a loser like me?" Asked Shinji sarcastically.
"I'm sorry, ok?" Asuka whispered to Shinji.
Misato pinched her nose. "I swear you two are going to be the death of me. I'll think about it, but no promises."
"Fair enough." Stated Asuka
"Now get out of bed! You have fifty-five minutes until school starts, so hurry up!" Misato voiced loudly.
"I'm not going to school looking like this!" Yelled Asuka.
"Yes you are."
"No I'm not!" Asuka yelled back.
"You don't have a choice Asuka, now get your ass out of bed!" Now it was Misato's turn to yell.
"Why the hell are you up so early?" Asked Asuka
"I figured you would try to stay home, so I set my alarm clock early." Smirked Misato.
"You're such a bitch." Asuka stated while covering her face with her blanket.
Misato just smiled as she left Asuka's room, heading for the fridge.
"So how bad is it Shinji?" Asuka Asked
"Um, well, uh i-its not too bad, I guess. Do you have a big pair of sunglasses?" Shinji asked.
"It's going to be one of those days, isn't it? Sighed Asuka.
Shinji just nodded his head before heading out to finish getting himself ready for school. Asuka quickly ate her breakfast, slid her feet off the bed and let out a small eep when her feet touched the cold floor. The first thing Asuka did was head to the shower to finish her little fantasy. She quickly climaxed and proceeded to cleanse her body of any and all of her juices. Asuka made quick work of lathering her body with the tropical melon scented body wash, but as she was bent over washing her calves, her vision started to go black. She quickly grabbed the shower curtain and sat herself down on the edge of the tub. Asuka sat like this for a couple of minutes before she felt good enough to stand on her own.
"That was strange." Asuka said to herself as she rinsed the body wash off.
***
Shinji entering the classroom commanded very little attention from his classmates. Asuka wasn't so lucky as everyone stared at Asuka's bruised cheek and black eye. She tried to pay no attention to the snickers, but some of them came from people that she thought had been friends. The consensus of the classroom was that they were surprised it had taken this long for someone to put her in her place. Anyone who actually knew what happened had elevated Toji to an almost God like stature, while the others just assumed Shinji had finally had enough of her shit. Which of coarse by lunchtime had evolved into Shinji smoked crack and tried to have sex with Asuka, only for her to refuse him because she was on her period, which in turn, caused him to beat her. Shinji wasn't particularity fond of that one, but there was nothing he could do about it. He just wished people would stop coming up to him and offering to be his new supplier. He would refuse their offer to sell him smack and then tell them that if he wanted smack, he would just insult Asuka, and she would give it to him for free. 'Why the hell would someone pay to get smacked?' thought Shinji.
For some reason or another, seeing Asuka wounded had caused some sort of uprising among the masses. A couple times during the day she had her books knocked out of her hands, and by third period, she had lost count how many time she heard the word "bitch" while walking by a crowd of people. Asuka was finding out that she wasn't as popular as she thought she was.
"Next time you should just have sex with him!" Shouted a nobody to the amusement of everybody in earshot.
Asuka ignored him as she closed her locker and headed towards the exit. 'Like he would want to have sex with me.' Asuka thought to herself before realizing what she had thought.
"What's wrong with me?" Asuka asked herself self quietly.
"What's wrong Asuka?" Apparently she hadn't spoken quiet enough, but at least Shinji was here to keep her company.
"Nothing, so how was your random drug test?" Asuka giggled knowing full well it was because of the rumors.
"Unpleasant to say the least." After the drug test, the newest rumor was that when Shinji dropped his pants, the nurse gasped at the sight of his unit, then she applauded him when he did the helicopter. Of coarse this brings a whole new meaning to the phrase 'Pilot Ikari'.
"But nowhere near as bad as the body cavity search." Shinji was still walking bowlegged with a 'squishy' sound emanating from his ass with every step he made.
"Awe, has my poor little baka been violated?" She smirked.
Shinji shuttered at Asuka's comments.
"I don't think I will be able to sit for a week." Shinji said while he rubbed his ass.
"Well then its a good thing your going to be waiting on me hand and foot for the next week!" Announced the redhead.
Shinji smiled at that comment, its not that he liked being a servant, he just now has a reason to be around Asuka.
"Anything for you Asuka." Now it was Asuka's turn to smile.
"So then you will punch Toji back for me?" Asuka asked as she put her arms around his arm and snuggled up to his shoulder.
"I-I already told you that I wont do that Asuka." Shinji said while trying not to blush.
"But I thought you said you loved me?" Asuka batted her eyelashes.
"I-I d-do, but I'm not going to hit my best friend." Said a slightly annoyed Shinji.
"But its ok for your best friend to hit me?" Asked a slightly irritated Asuka.
"Hell no it isn't, and I told him to never lay a hand on you again, but he has been punished enough." Asuka released Shinji and put her hands on her hips.
"What happens when some other guy hits me? Are you just going to stand there like a scared child again?" Shinji slowly backed away from Asuka.
"If you would stop treating people badly you wouldn't have to worry about getting hit."
"Oh, so you think its my fault Toji hit me? I only slapped him because he kept calling me names!" Yelled Asuka.
"It is at least a little bit, the only person you treat worse then Toji is me!" Shinji talked with a frown on his face.
"And we all know that your not above man handling a woman!" Shinji cringed at the low blow.
"And I'm sorry for that, but obviously you haven't learned your lesson about being mean to people!" Yelled Shinji"
"I can treat people any way I want!" Small children and animals sought shelter at the sight of the pissed off girl.
"Then don't come crying to me the next time you get hit!" Shinji's fists were turning white from being squeezed so tight.
"Your such an asshole, Third Child!" Yelled Asuka.
"I would have to be to put up with a bitch like you, Second Child!" Shouted Shinji.
That statement earned Shinji a slap to the face. Shinji closed his eyes and took a few deep breaths before responding.
"How is you hitting me any different then Toji hitting you?" Shinji spoke behind gritted teeth.
"Because I am a fucking girl! Girls are allowed to hit men!" Shouted Asuka.
"You know Asuka, I may not have a lot of friends, but I don't need a friend like you" Shinji said calmly.
"Fuck you too Shinji! I don't need you either!" Asuka screamed.
Shinji continued home while the furious German watched his silhouette walk towards the horizon.
"I don't need you Shinji." She said softly to herself.
***
Once she had calmed down enough to think clearly, she was open to the possibility that maybe she had gone a little too far. She even almost felt bad for slapping him, almost. Asuka figured she would shake her hips, do a little flirting and all would be forgotten. Asuka took a deep breath and walked into his room. Shinji glared at her as she sat down on the bed next to him. She put her arms around him and laid her head on his shoulder. "I'm sorry Shi..." was as far as she got before Shinji pushed her off of him and onto the floor. Asuka looked at him in Shock. "Shinji! I was trying to apologize!" Shinji stood up and looked at her.
"I was serious Asuka, I'm done with you." Shinji said in a cold voice, his cheek was still red from where she had slapped him.
"Why the hell are being like this Shinji?!" Asuka was confused why he was rejecting her.
"You have proven to me that your words don't mean anything. You say what people want to hear, and then you act however you want to."
"Shinji, I admit I may have over reacted, but that doesn't mean I'm not trying to change. I warned you that there would be times that your stupidity would outweigh my patience, and the fact that you pushed me onto your floor and I haven't called you a name, hit or thrown anything at you should prove to you that I'm trying to change." Asuka said as she stared at him from the floor.
"It's too little, too late Asuka, I have nothing left to give."
"Why are you being like this?" Asuka looked at him with confusion on her face
"I would appreciate it if you left my room."
Asuka was about to protest when Shinji grabbed her upper arm and forcibly helped her up, he then dragged her across his room and out of the door. Asuka slowly made it to her room, she picked her cellphone off of her desk and sat on her bed with her back against the wall. She found Hikari's number in her phone book and pressed send.
"Hello?"
"I need your help Hikari."
"What's wrong Asuka?"
"Me and Shinji had an argument and I lost my temper and smacked him." Asuka bit her lower lip in anticipation of Hikari's reaction.
"Damn it Asuka, You just couldn't be good for one damn day, could you?"
"What the hell?! I lost my temper, it's bound to happen Hikari." Asuka waved her free hand in the air.
"I'm sorry Asuka, I've just been in a horrible mood the past couple days. So how mad is Shinji?"
"I went to his room, sat on his bed and hugged him, while apologizing to him, and he pushed me off of him and onto the floor. He then told me he was serious when he said he was done with me and that he has nothing more to give."
"What else happened?"
"He grabbed me by the arm, stood me up and dragged me out of his room."
"He was rough with you?"
"Yea, I'm sure I'm going to have a bruise on my arm tomorrow. The weirdest part is that he didn't sound mad when he was talking to me, he just sounded... like he was disappointed."
"Ikari isn't the type of person to be rough with a girl, and so far, he has been rough with you twice over the last two days. I think you finally pushed him too far."
"What should I do Hikari?"
"I'm not sure if there is anything you can do Asuka."
Asuka used her free arm to hug her stomach. "I'm not just going to let him give up on me."
"The only chance you have is to show him that you've changed. Actions speak louder then words Asuka."
"And what if it's too late and no matter what I do he still hates me?"
"Well, then you spend the rest of you life knowing that you were the one that messed it up."
"I hope it's not too late."
"For your sake, so do I. It's dinner time, so I will talk to you later."
"Goodbye Hikari."
"Goodbye Asuka."
Asuka ended the call and put her cell phone on the night stand. She then curled up under her blankets and stared at the wall; she eventually fell asleep. Shinji finally had enough of his room and went into the kitchen to make dinner. He decided to do a traditional Japanese diner that consisted of fish and rice (surprise, surprise) with an egg based soup. He set a plate for him and Misato, but left Asuka to get her own plate. Shinji walked to Misato's room and knocked.
"Dinners ready."
Misato groggily rolled over and in a hoarse voice told Shinji that she either wanted him to go fuck himself, or that she would be there shortly. Probably the latter Shinji thought as he went back to the kitchen. Misato clumsily got out of bed and stepped into the kitchen. She sat in front of her plate and opened the beer Shinji had readied for her. She took a couple lady like gulps and then delicately and gracefully wiped her mouth onto her sleeve. She burped before speaking.
"Where is Asuka?"
"I'm not positive, but I think she is in her room."
"Please don't tell me you're fighting again?" Misato banged her head against the table.
"Past tense, we fought and I told her I was done with her." Shinji picked at his food as he responded.
"I'm going to assume that's why your cheek is red?" Shinji just nodded his head yes.
"Do you want me to make her apologize?" Misato asked before taking another gulp.
"She already tried. I told her I didn't care and her words mean nothing to me." Misato faltered.
"How did she take that?" Misato's left eye gave a small twitch.
"I dragged her ass... I mean.. uh, I kindly -yet forcibly- removed her from my room and I haven't heard a peep from her since."
Misato just stared at him for a few moments before speaking "Wait, you act like an ass, and she doesn't tear you a new one? That scares me."
"Why does that scare you?" Asked Shinji as he gave her a strange look.
"There's things about her that you don't know, just wait here, I'll go check on her."
Misato got up from her chair and walked to Asuka's door, opened it and then walked in. She saw the redhead laying on her bed. She cautiously walked up to her and checked her pulse. This caused Asuka to wake up.
"Misato what are you doing?" Asked the sleepy German.
"I was just checking to see if you were ok." Misato caressed Asuka's cheek as she spoke.
"I take it he told you." Asuka said bluntly while rubbing her eyes.
Misato nodded her head. "Are you ok Asuka?"
Asuka rolled onto her back and propped herself up on her elbows. "I didn't try anything stupid, if that's what your asking." Asuka glared at Misato with sleepy eyes.
"Oh thank God, You know I worry about you." Misato sat down next to Asuka and started running her fingers through her hair.
"Just because I'm not taking the pills Ritsuko prescribed, doesn't mean I'm going to do things to hurt myself Misato." Asuka said irritably.
"I can't help it Asuka, I don't know what I would do if I were to lose either of you." Asuka's resolve softened a little at Misato's words.
"I care about you too Misato, but I don't accuse you of trying to drown yourself in alcohol, do I?"
Misato sighed and gave a weak smile. "Your right, I'm sorry, but you know how paranoid I can be sometimes when it comes to you kids."
"I know, I know." Sighed Asuka while she looked away from her.
Misato grabbed Asuka's hand. Do you want to talk about it?"
"There's nothing really to talk about. I messed up and he won't give me a second chance." Asuka wanted to back away from her touch, but the warmth felt good.
"Do you think you deserve a second chance?"
Asuka took a couple of moments to answer. "In my opinion yes, I think he is just afraid of getting close to someone that has a tendency to hurt him. I'm the same way, so I can't really be mad at him for that, but by God, if my name was Gendo Ikari he would be begging for me to let him forgive me."
"Yea I don't understand why he tries so hard to get along with his father."
"I don't get it either, but then again, I have no need to be close to my father." Asuka said.
"Anyways, dinners ready if your hungry." Misato got off her bed and walked out of the room.
Asuka nodded her head and stood up, she fixed her hair in her mirror before following her guardian to the kitchen. She sat at her seat only to see Shinji hadn't readied a plate for her. She stood up and made her own plate without making any derogatory comments. She was disappointed with what Shinji had made, but she figured that was his way of letting her know he was still angry with her. Asuka tried to lighten the mood by occasionally making comments about how good dinner was, only to have Misato give her the look that told her she was trying too hard.
"So Shinji, are you ready for that test tomorrow?" Asuka cringed at how desperate she sounded.
Shinji didn't even bother to look at her as he stood up and placed his plate on the counter. He turned to Misato. "It's Asuka's turn to do the dishes." Was all he said before heading to the balcony to get some fresh air.
"He is such an ass!" Said Asuka as she placed her arms on the table and her head on her arms.
"He will get over it eventually Asuka." Misato took a swig of her beer.
"I don't think he will Misato." Asuka said dejectedly.
"Time heals all wounds Asuka." Spoke Misato before she took a sip of her beer.
"So your saying it doesn't hurt to see Kaji flirt with someone else?" Misato's eye twitched.
"Hurts like hell Asuka, but we have a lot of unresolved issues."
"And an unresolved issue isn't being told your loved one minute, and then tossed aside the next?" Asuka took Misato's beer away from her and took a swig.
Misato glared at the redhead before snatching her beer back, "Fine, it's bullshit, Time doesn't heal anything, it just makes the pain a little easier to deal with."
"Well that ass can do whatever he wants to do. I have dishes to do." Asuka stood up and took her and Misato's plates to the sink.
"You know Asuka, maybe you should take those pills that Ritsuko prescribed." Misato dodged the dish towel Asuka had chucked at her.
Asuka let out a sigh and lowered her head. "No promises, but I will think about it."
"That's all I ask." Misato took a sip of her beer. "Go out to the balcony and talk to Shinji, but be sincere."
Asuka adverted her attention to the balcony, Shinji was sitting in one of the lounge chairs staring at the setting sun. Asuka slowly made her way to the balcony. Shinji glared at her as she sat next to him. His cold demeanor made Asuka shiver. She gently placed her hand on his arm. "I just want you to hear me out and then I will leave you alone."
Shinji let out a sigh. "I'll say this slow enough, so even you will be able to understand what I'm saying." Asuka removed her hand, anger was quickly building up inside her. "I'm done with you Asuka. There is nothing you can say or do that's going to change my mind. Did you understand that, or do I need to draw you a picture?"
Asuka stood up and crossed her arms. "Why are you being such a dick?"
"Why don't you be a good little girl and take your ass back into the house and do the dishes?" Smirked Shinji.
"Does the little pussy like acting like a big strong man?" Asuka said in a condescending baby voice with her hands on her hips.
"You really are a stupid bitch Asuka." Shinji was squeezing his fists.
"Whats a pussy like you going to do about it? Hmm? You going to run crying to Misato that the mean little girl hurt your feelings?" Asuka pushed Shinji as hard as she could. "What the fuck are you going to do about it, pussy?!" Shinji stumbled a step or two backwards, Asuka was a little surprised she couldn't push him more then that.
"Don't you ever fucking touch me again, you little w-whore!" Misato did a spit take when Shinji said that.
Asuka was far beyond control at this point. Asuka stepped up to Shinji and punched him right in his cocksucker. "Now who's the stupid bitch!" Asuka yelled.
Shinji stumbled back and touched his mouth, his eye twitched when he saw the blood on his hand. Shinji smacked her back. Well, that was intent, he noticed that just a slap wouldn't have resulted with Asuka on the ground - in tears - holding her mouth. Shinji didn't remember thinking about kicking her, but Asuka's cry of pain told him he had done it. Twice.
Asuka was on her hands and knees with tears streaming down her cheeks; she clutched her stomach as blood still trickled out of her mouth. Asuka rolled to her side and curled up into the fetal position. By the time Misato had made it outside, Asuka had already regurgitated dinner.
"Shinji, go to your room! I'll be in to yell at you shortly!" Demanded Misato as she pointed inside. She knelt down next to Asuka and put her hand on the German's side. "That's not what I meant when I said be sincere."
Apparently Asuka had lost her sense of humor.
Misato gave Asuka a few minutes to calm down before she helped her up. Asuka whimpered as she tried to stand straight. "Just stay bent over, you need to take a hot bath to help loosen your muscles up or they will continue to cramp." Misato wiped a trail of blood that had gone down Asuka's cheek.
"T-that asshole k-kicked me." Asuka said shakily. Misato just nodded her head as she led Asuka to the bathtub.
"Asuka?"
"Asuka?"
"Asuka?!"
"What?" Asuka said groggily as she turned over in bed.
"You really are a heavy sleeper, I had to yell your name three times to wake you up."
"Why did you wake me up?" Asuka asked in her grumpy voice.
"Oh yea, dinners ready." Misato said with a goofy grin on her face.
Asuka thought about the dream she had and decided not to tempt fate. "I'm not hungry, if you don't mind I would like to go back to sleep now." Asuka rolled over and covered herself in her blanket.
"Suit yourself." Misato turned around and walked out of her room.
***
Shinji awoke the next morning to the sound of his blaring alarm clock. He quickly silenced the infernal contraption and stepped out of bed. The cold wooden floor sent a shiver up his spine. He hazily walked into the bathroom and took his morning shower. After the hot water had awoken his senses, he decided that he was going to make today be a good day. With that thought in mind, he resisted the urge to add some more of his special man sauce to Asuka's shampoo bottle. Although, he did use her scrunchy to clean his junk, which elicited a small giggle from Shinji. Once dressed, he entered the kitchen and started to make breakfast. He wasn't completely sure what he was going to make, he just knew it was going to be something Asuka hated. Normally he would wake Asuka up when he was done making breakfast, but Shinji had already decided that today wasn't going to be a normal day. So he ate breakfast in piece, he made his lunch in piece, he cleaned his mess in peace and he walked to school in peace.
Asuka wasn't having a normal day either, at least that is the thought that went through her head when she woke up, looked at her cellphone and seen it was nine thirty in the morning. She slowly got out of bed and went to the bathroom to start her bath. She always felt that late is late, regardless if it's ten minutes or three hours. After bathing and getting dressed, she went to the fridge to see what Shinji had made for breakfast.
"Plain white rice? What an asshole!" Shouted Asuka. And then she noticed there was no lunch for her. "Shinji you son of a bitch!" Shouted the angry German as she threw together a quick lunch. Afterwards, she made a quick call to Misato to ask for her to write her a note, and to see if she could get a ride from section two. Misato said yes to both requests, section two would pick her up in five minutes. Asuka grabbed her lunch, put her shoes on and went downstairs to wait for her ride, cursing Shinji the entire way.
The black Suburban pulled up to the curb and a man in black Special Ops attire got out of the vehicle and opened the rear passenger door for her. She said her thanks and entered the vehicle. Once inside, she engaged in small talk with the two escorts until she arrived at school a few minutes later. She was escorted into the building and directly to the principles office. The head section two agent explained to the principle that Asuka was busy with official Nerv business and that Major Katsuragi thanks them for their understanding. Asuka said her thanks to the escorts and made her way to class with a note the principle had given her. The teacher frowned upon her arrival, but any protest he might have had was silenced when he read the note. Asuka purposely adverted her gaze from the smirking asshole and sat in her seat. Asuka didn't even have her laptop fully opened before she was assaulted by her first message.
CanonEOS: What the hell is going on between you and Shinji?
Pilot02: He's your friend, he should be the one to tell you
CanonEOS: He did tell me, I was just willing to hear your side of the story before I jumped to the conclusion that your a devil bitch
Pilot02: You have never considered my side of the story before, why now?
CanonEOS: Maybe I understand you a little better then I did before
Pilot02: We got into a fight, I messed up and slapped him
CanonEOS: Who started the fight?
Pilot02: I did, I felt he should defend my honor and hit Toji back for me
CanonEOS: I guess you really were a bitch like he said
Pilot02: He called me a bitch??
CanonEOS: You really don't want to know what all he has called you
Asuka stared at the screen.
Pilot02: I... Why are you telling me all of this?
CanonEOS: Because we had a bet going. Shinji bet that he could call you a bitch, have me tell you that he said it, and you wouldn't yell at me. So now I owe him one thousand yen
Pilot02: Just leave me alone
Pilot02 has signed out.
CanonEOS: I know she is pure evil, but I can't help but to feel bad right now
Shin-Man: You only feel bad because you lost the bet
ToJam: Kensuke is right, she may deserve to get treatedly like that but dont that make us as bad as her???
Shin-Man: I don't know, if you guys don't want to get involved then I'll just stick to ignoring her
CanonEOS: Dude are you sure you still want to keep that up too? What if she gives up on you for good?
Shin-Man: I don't care
CanonEOS: You have always been a shitty liar
Shin-Man: I'm dead serious, It would make me happy if she would move back to Germany
ToJam: Damn dude
CanonEOS: Alright man, if thats what you say
Shin-Man: You guys need to trust me, I've dropped her like a bad habit
ClassRep has signed in.
ClassRep: Do I even want to know why Asuka won't answer her messages???
Shin-Man: The better question is do any of us care that she isn't
ToJam: She a little mad at Kensuke and Shinji right now
CanonEOS: Traitor!!!!
ClassRep: Why is she mad
Shin-Man: I bet Kensuke that I could call her a bitch and he could tell her and she wouldn't get mad at him
ToJam: I had nothing to do with it I swear!
CanonEOS: A little whipped are we?
ClassRep: Shut up Kensuke, Shinji I think you should apologize to Asuka...
Shin-Man: I'm sorry Hikari but I won't apologize to her
ClassRep: Do you know how awkward you are making this Shinji?
Shin-Man: How am I making anything awkward???
ClassRep: Toji likes hanging out with you. I like hanging out with him. Asuka likes to hangout with me. You don't want to be within ten feet of Asuka. You and Kensuke would do things to depress her more then she already is. I would get mad at you two. I would ask Toji to pick between hanging out with you two or me. Do you now understand why you are making this awkward.
Shin-Man: And Asuka is the one that put me in the position that I am
ClassRep: I know, it's her fault, but she apologized to you. You should have accepted it and moved on
Shin-Man: Just so she could turn around and do it again when something doesn't go her way???
ClassRep: She is trying Shinji, she really is
Shin-Man: Too little, too late
ClassRep: Have it your way Shinji. You will regret this.
ClassRep has signed out.
ToJam: Hey guys I got to go
CanonEOS: Bye Toji
Shin-Man: Later
ToJam has signed out.
CanonEOS: She does seem to be honestly sorry
Shin-Man: Not you too Kensuke... I need you on my side!
CanonEOS: Dude calm down, I am on your side.
Shin-Man: Then stop trying to defend her. You were always the one to tell me how bad she is
CanonEOS: I'm just trying to make sure you don't do something you will end up regretting
Shin-Man has signed out.
CanonEOS: He is being an asshole.
Kensuke realized that he just sent the message to himself and closed the IM program and opened up a game. Meanwhile, Shinji had his head down on his desk and Asuka was chatting with Hikari about how much of an asshole Shinji was this morning. And of coarse, Toji was staring at Hikari. Shinji heard a beep come from his laptop, he pondered whether or not he should open it. He finally did when he received a second beep.
GreenEyes: Hi!
GreenEyes: Help! I'm trapped inside your laptop!
Shin-Man: Lol, who's this?
GreenEyes: My name is Tamara
Shin-Man: Oh, you started here two weeks ago, right?
GreenEyes: You remembered! That's so sweet!
Shin-Man: So how do you like it here?
GreenEyes: It's a lot like my old school, except there people didn't treat me like crap for not being Japanese
Shin-Man: Really?? I figured with Asuka being here nobody would have problems with foreigners. Oh wait, maybe it's because of her...
GreenEyes: I'm going to assume your talking about the redhead in our class?
Shin-Man: Yea, she is basically a bitch to everyone, so they may think that you are like that too
GreenEyes: I've been called talkative, but never a bitch lol
Shin-Man: Well so far I would say your nothing like her!
GreenEyes: Isn't she your girlfriend?
Shin-Man: NO, we were friends and we are roommates, but that's as far as it goes
GreenEyes: Your no longer friends?
Shin-Man: No, we had a fight a couple days ago, (one of thousands) and I told her I couldn't take it anymore
GreenEyes: It sounds like you need a new friend! :-)
Shin-Man: You would want to be my friend???
GreenEyes: Everyone think very highly of you, they say your a good person. Who wouldn't want to be friends with a person like that?
Shin-Man: Well you seem like a good person yourself
GreenEyes: They said you were nice!
Shin-Man: Thanks, what kind of music do you listen too?
GreenEyes: You promise not to laugh at me?
Shin-Man: Yes, I promise.
GreenEyes: Classical, there's nothing like a good symphony to calm the nerves
Shin-Man: Well if I would laugh at you I would have to laugh at myself also.
GreenEyes: You like classic too???
Shin-Man: Yes, and I even play it on my Cello
GreenEyes: That's so cool!
Shin-Man: Really???
GreenEyes: Yes Really! I would love to hear you play sometime!
Shin-Man: Ok, but I'm not that good at it
GreenEyes: They also say your very modest
Shin-Man: Yea I guess so, we could go to a park or something, I could see Asuka trying to ruin our fun
GreenEyes: How about my place?
Shin-Man: Great! I'll be there around 6:30
Shinji and Tamara carried on the conversation for the rest of the morning. Shinji discovered that him and Tamara have a lot in common, they share the same taste in movies, plays and basically everything else. Shinji invited Tamara to join him and his friends for lunch, and she accepted.
Shinji was fairly confident that he just found his distraction from Asuka. Meanwhile, Asuka was wondering what was being said that would make him smile so much.
Pilot02: Who is Shinji talking to??
ClassRep: I'm not sure, but I know it's not Toji or Kensuke
Pilot02: How can you tell?
ClassRep: Kensuke is playing a game and Toji is staring at me
Pilot02: Maybe he's talking to another girl...
ClassRep: I did warn you Asuka, you really need to set things straight with him...
Pilot02: I will try talking to him again tonight
ClassRep: Just remember to stay calm
Pilot02: I know, I know
***
Later that day Asuka was at home doing her homework, well, she was pretending to do her homework so she would have a legitimate excuse to wait in the kitchen for Shinji to get home. He had come home from school, made himself and Misato a quick dinner and then grabbed his cello and left without saying a word. Asuka finally listened to her rumbling stomach and put down her pencil and got up to make herself dinner. She attempted to make herself chicken nuggets out of some chicken breast that was in the freezer. Asuka ignored the fact that she didn't know how to make the batter, and that they didn't have a deep fryer and that she tried cooking them in a microwave. Had anyone bothered to be around at the time, they would have seen Asuka openly admit failure for the first time in her life.
After cleaning up the mess, she picked up her cell and called a pizza place that delivers. Being somewhat conscious of her need to prove to Shinji that she is trying to be a better person, she asked for the pizza to be divided in half. The right side contained everything she and Misato like, while the other side contained what Shinji liked. She hoped the saying 'small gestures go a long way' would hold true. After the pizza was delivered, Asuka went to her room and put on her usual night attire. She grabbed a plate from the cabinet and put a slice of pizza on it and went and sat in front of the T.V.. Another piece of pizza, a couple of sodas and an hour and half later, Shinji finally came through the doorway carrying his cello. Asuka jumped to her feet and greeted Shinji as he walked by.
"Welcome home Shinji!" Asuka said a little too enthusiastically. Shinji just ignored her, walked into his room and put his cello in the corner. He then walked back into the kitchen to get a drink.
"I ordered a pizza with what you like on half of it, if you are hungry." Asuka said hoping that would get his attention.
"Too lazy to cook?" Was Shinji's only response.
"I-I screwed up making chicken nuggets." Asuka said dejectedly with her head down.
"Why the hell would you try and make chicken nug... Wait, were did you get the chicken from?"
"I got it from the freezer?" Asuka said questioningly.
"Damn it Asuka!" Shinji's outburst startled Asuka. "That's what I was going to use for dinner tomorrow!"
"How was I Su..." Was all she could say before being cut off by Shinji.
"Maybe if you stopped for one second to think about someone else besides yourself for a change, you would have realized that maybe the chicken was in there for a reason!" Yelled Shinji.
"Why are you yelling at me?!" Shouted Asuka in return.
"Because your an inconsiderate bitch that takes what ever she wants without thinking about the effects it will have on other people!" Shinji was now a few inches away from her.
"It just some fucking chicken Shinji! I will go buy some more tomorrow after school. And I wouldn't have used it if you wouldn't have been a prick and not made me dinner!" Asuka shouted in response.
"Is her royal fucking heinous upset with her lowly commoner roommate? Shall I get down on my hands and knees and kiss her feet to make up for it?"
"No, but you can kiss my ass!" Shouted Asuka as she stormed into her room.
"If that's what her Heinous requests!" Shouted Shinji through Asuka's door.
Shinji lost the urge to continue when he heard the muffled sobs escape Asuka's room. He ignored the knot in his stomach as he headed off to his room to get some sleep.
***
Asuka's cell phone going off is what had interrupted her slumber. Knowing that she couldn't count on Shinji to wake her up has caused her to set the alarm on her phone. She rubbed the sleep from her slightly swollen eyes and walked towards the bathroom. After leaving the shower, she got dressed and headed into the kitchen. She poured herself a glass of orange juice and sat at the table until it was time to leave. Mysteriously, she had yet to see Shinji, not that she minded, she was now hell bent on ignoring him. She found that it was easy to pretend she hated him if she actually did hate him. Her entire lonely walk to school consisted of her cursing his very existence in the world. Her rant was cut short by the sight of Hikari walking down the street with that bastard and his stooge buddies, plus one.
'Who's the girl? Maybe she was walking with Hikari.' Asuka thought to herself.
Asuka kept her distance from the group as they made their way into the school. She quickly went to her locker, got her books out and headed to class so she would be the first person there. Well the first person if Ayanami didn't bother to show up. Asuka walked into the classroom and was presented with one of the biggest shocks of her life. Rei was standing in front of the chalkboard, half way through drawing a three foot penis on it. Each teen froze at the sight of the other. They just stared at each other for a few moments before Ayanami squinted her eyes.
"Tell no one." Was all that Rei said.
"O-ok." Asuka shivered at the glare she was receiving.
Rei proceeded to finish the drawing and then went to her desk and sat down. Asuka didn't dare look at her, but she could have sworn she saw Rei smirking out of the corner of her eye. They sat in silence staring at the penis for the next ten minutes until Hikari walked in. She made it about halfway to her seat before realization struck.
"Another one! If I ever catch the pervert that keeps doing this!" Fumed the class rep.
"This is... unacceptable behavior, may I suggest you do a better job of keeping your class in check." Rei said without one single facial expression.
"I apologize Rei, I promise to do a better job in the future." Said a dejected Hikari as she erased the chalk board.
"Very well." Is all Rei said.
Asuka just stared at the board, rapidly blinking with her mouth slightly open. 'What the hell just happened?' Asuka thought to herself. Her stupor was interrupted by Hikari. "Asuka, did you see who did this?" Asuka looked at her friend questioningly. "What did you say?" Hikari repeated herself and Asuka looked towards Ayanami. Rei was glaring at the redhead, She silently mouthed the words "I will fucking cut you"... Ok, so maybe she didn't actually do that last part, but regardless, Asuka got a cold chill. "N-no, i-it was done before I came in." Asuka shivered and rubbed her arms, Rei smirked before returning her attention to the front of the class.
By the time she got her mind off of it the other students started filling in their seats. Neither Shinji nor Asuka paid attention to the other one. Their friends did notice that Asuka genuinely seemed to dislike Shinji. She didn't steal glances at him, she didn't frown whenever someone said his name and she didn't take Hikari up on her offer to join her and the three stooges for lunch. Instead she choose to sit by herself on the other side of the yard. Hikari did feel bad about abandoning her friend, but her and Toji were starting to get close and Shinji's new friend Tamara seemed to be really nice. She also noticed that there was a lot less drama when Asuka wasn't involved in their daily lives. Asuka on the other hand, hadn't felt this alone since the first couple of years after her mom died. She knew it was her own damn fault, but she also knew he was at least partially responsible. Asuka wasn't sure if she would have the strength to be alone like this for the rest of the school year.
Maybe it was time to consider moving back to Germany. Maybe it was time to move back home with them. Asuka pulled her knees to her chest and lowered her head.
'I never thought I would actually miss hanging out with the stooges' Asuka thought to herself.
Lunch was almost over when Asuka stood up and dusted herself off. She was heading into the building when she seen Shinji talking to a girl. Asuka recognized her as the one that was walking with him this morning. She went and found Hikari still eating with the stooges. Asuka tapped her on the shoulder. "Can I talk to you for a moment?" Hikari nodded her head and gave Toji a quick smile. They walked away to get some privacy.
"What's up Asuka?"
"Why is Shinji talking to that girl?" Asuka wrapped her arms around her stomach.
Hikari shook her head. "Because he is being friendly, she really hasn't made that many friends since she moved here."
"What, is she hard to get along with?"
Hikari cleared her throat. "Well apparently most of the students here believe that all foreigners act like you. Therefore, they aren't willing to give her a chance." Asuka left eye started to twitch.
"They're all stupid anyways." Was Asuka's only comment.
"Yes Asuka, they are the ones with the problem, not you." Hikari rolled her eyes.
Asuka glared at her friend. "Now your against me to Hikari?"
"It's not like that, you just need to quit blaming everyone else for your problems."
"Whatever, I'm so sorry to have taken you away from your friends." Asuka's words were laced with sarcasm.
Asuka turned around and walked into the building. She grabbed her backpack from her locker and slammed the door shut before she headed home instead of going back to class. Shinji walked into the school just in time to see Asuka exit out of the opposite doors. He shrugged his shoulders and walked into the classroom. Hikari walked into the classroom with Toji and Kensuke, she saw Asuka's empty desk and shook her head. 'Damn it' is what Hikari thought as she took her seat.
***
The next couple of days had gone the same as the last. Asuka was alone at school; Asuka was alone at home. Asuka was tired being alone. Apparently, Toji finally had the courage to ask Hikari out -she said yes- and now she spent every waking moment with him. And Shinji was doing God knows what with God knows who, all she knew is that he was never home anymore. But Asuka still didn't dare try to make herself dinner anymore, Shinji was already too distant for her liking. Not that it really mattered anyways, she would throw up anything she ate. Asuka would just lay on her bed and stare at the ceiling, waiting for Shinji to get home, hoping that just one time he would come into her room and talk to her. Was it too much to ask for a simple conversation? Was she such a bad person that he would never be able to forgive her?
Asuka clutched her teddy bear as she rolled onto her side. Tears were once again falling on her bed.
"Asuka, can I come in?" Asked Misato.
"Y-yes."
Misato opened the door and almost faltered at the sight of the crying redhead, but Misato never missed a beat as she walked to the bed and sat next to her.
"I've gotten a call from Hikari, She's worried that you seem to be slipping into a depressed state."
"I would say that's fairly accurate." Asuka said sarcastically.
"Do you want to talk about it?" Misato asked as she ran her fingers through Asuka's hair.
"What do you want to hear? You want to know that Shinji hates me? Or maybe you want to hear how my last remaining friend abandoned me for her boyfriend? Or how I spend my days and nights so utterly and completely alone that I cry myself to sleep each night. How about how I often wish that I had died during the angel wars?" Asuka had resumed crying.
"Asuka..."
"I know a good one, how about how three hours ago, I was too chicken to cut my own wrists as I sat naked on the toilet. I had the knife to my wrist, and yet I couldn't do it."
"Asuka..."
"Please don't talk to me like that! I'm tired of being such a disappointment to everyone!" Sobbed Asuka.
"Asuka, I could never be disappointed in you!" Misato put her arms around the sobbing redhead.
"I-I don't know what to do anymore M-Misato."
"Shh Asuka, I know your going through a bad time right now, but everything will get better. I know your not a fan of being on pills to go about your daily life, but I think they could really do you some good Asuka. I really wish you would start taking those pills. Ok?"
Asuka just nodded her head yes.
Misato laid down with Asuka, holding her tightly in her arms and running her fingers through her hair until she feel asleep.
***
This week had played hell on Asuka's mental state. She spent most of her nights crying herself to sleep, she spent most of her days alone with only her thoughts to occupy her with. It wasn't too bad at first, she would make jokes to her self at other peoples expenses, or she would remember a lot of the good times she had. But her thoughts didn't stay positive for long. Soon, she was enthralled in thoughts of self hatred and suicide. She would day dream about how much Shinji would regret ignoring her while attending her funeral.
After the failed attempt, she knew it was time to stop lying to herself. She was going to have to take the pills if she ever wanted to be sane again. She went to her closet and pulled out the bottles and read the directions. She took the proper dosage and laid on her bed.
She had hesitated taking the pills because she was afraid that the pills would make her feel separated from herself, make her feel like a doll. After they had taken affect, she was pleased to discover that they had a calming affect on her. She definitely felt a little off, but not as bad as she thought it was going to be.
"I'll just take them until I can get out of this funk." Asuka was trying to convince herself that this was a temporary problem. Asuka rolled off of her bed, stood in front of her mirror and looked at herself.
"Maybe Shinji will now be able to stand being around me."
"Maybe he will love me again."
Asuka dropped her head. "Then maybe I can stop hating myself."
Unbeknownst to Asuka, Shinji had heard every word.
"Maybe I should just forget that Shinji even exists." Asuka said to herself.
Asuka decided that she should go for a walk to clear her head. She spent the next couple of hours at the park contemplating what she could do to get Shinji to talk to her. She came to the conclusion that she was either going to have to beat him in to compliance, or seduce him. She quickly decided that she would kick the shit out of that scrawny little asshole, and if that didn't work, she would then seduce him.
Asuka was surprised to come home and see Misato sitting at the kitchen table. Asuka took a quick inventory of the situation.
'Misato is sitting at the table, there is an open beer in front of her and five more unopened to her left. This can't be good'
"What's going on Misato?" Asuka asked nervously.
"There is something I need to talk to you and Shinji about" Misato said.
"Where is Shinji at anyways?" Asuka asked.
"Well if you two weren't fighting, you would know that he is with his Girlfriend" said Misato.
Asuka dropped her school bag and started at Misato in shock.
"B-But he said he was in love with me?" The hurt was plastered on her face.
"I'm sorry Asuka, but I guess Shinji just wanted to move on. Anyways I called his cell, and they should be here any minute." Misato cringed as a tear rolled down Asuka's cheek.
"Who is she, and why is she coming with him?" Asuka kept her eyes glued on the floor.
"Her name is Tamara Kinasha, do you know her?" Misato asked innocently.
"That Bitch! She just started at our school a couple weeks ago and she already has her claws in him! How dare she take my Shinji!" Said the not so jolly German.
"Don't you mean her Shinji?" Misato hadn't thought about what she was saying until after she had said it.
"Screw you Misato." said the tearful Sauerkraut.
"I'm sorry, I shouldn't have said that, But you have no one to blame but yourself Asuka." Misato reprimanded.
"Don't you think I know that! Don't you think I already hate myself enough for pushing him away!" Shouted Asuka.
The sound of the door opening ended the current conversation. Asuka wiped the tears away as Shinji walked in with his girlfriends hand intertwined with his own. Tamara was beautiful in her own right, she had medium length brown hair, green eyes and a slender figure. When Shinji saw the looks his girlfriend was getting From Asuka, he let go of her hand and put it around her waist.
This hurt the redhead more then she would ever show in front of that Shinji stealing bitch.
"Now that Shinji is here we can all sit down and talk, Tamara do you mind if we talk in private?" Asked Misato.
Shinji apologized to her and walked her to to the balcony. Once Shinji returned Misato continued.
"We have received intelligence that there is a radical organization that has announced their intention to eliminate certain Nerv employees for their parts in the defeating the Angels."
"How is that different from any other day?" Asked Asuka.
"Because they're specifically targeting Shinji." Misato spoke as she took a swig of her beer.
"Over my dead body!" Screamed an enraged Asuka.
Shinji's world came to a halt at their words. 'Because they're targeting Shinji' 'Over my dead body!' The dream he had a week or so ago was playing through his head. 'Asuka died in my arms after taking a bullet that was meant for me.' The thought of the dream being a premonition to future events frightened him. Shinji faced Asuka and put his hands on her shoulders.
"Asuka, you have to promise me that you won't put yourself in harms way to try and protect me." Shinji spoke while looking into Asuka's eyes.
"I wont stand by and let you die!" Now Asuka was yelling at Shinji.
"Asuka, listen to me carefully, I will never forgive myself if you died protecting me."
"No Shinji you listen to me! I will not stand by and do nothing! I wont let you die! Asuka was crying again.
"Calm down Asuka, we are increasing the security detail on Shinji to counter this threat." Said Misato.
"How serious are these people Misato?" Shinji asked.
"I wouldn't be telling you this if we didn't feel that it was a serious threat."
"Misato I want you to promise me that you wont let anything happen to Shinji." Asuka stated.
"We are doing everything in our power to prevent any harm from happening to him, Asuka." Said a slightly annoyed Misato.
"So what do I do now, do I go on about my business as usual or what?" Asked Shinji.
"Well first, you should dump that bitch, second, you should stay by me at all times." Asuka smirked, while Shinji frowned.
"First, don't call her a bitch Asuka, she is nothing like you. Second, I'm not spending every waking moment with you." Said Shinji.
"Oh I get it, you can defend your little girlfriend, but God forbid you ever defend me!" shouted the Bavarian bombshell.
"Stop it Asuka!" Misato yelled.
"No Misato! He yells at me for calling her a bitch, yet he said nothing when Toji called me a German whore!" yelled Asuka.
"I didn't yell at you Asuka, and I've heard the rumors at school, and I know you have been on a lot of dates!" Yelled Shinji.
"You think I'm a whore! I'm still a virgin you fucking asshole!" Asuka screamed as her tears rolled off her chin.
"You expect me to believe that with all the college guys you hung out with!" Asuka's heart broke when those words left Shinji's lips.
"Shinji, Asuka is still a virgin, her monthly physicals at Nerv prove that." Misato was disappointed he would think that little of Asuka.
"Y-You were my first kiss!" screamed Asuka between sobs.
Shinji was stunned and Asuka stormed into her room bawling, she collapsed on the floor next to her bed. Misato just shook her head as she retreated to her room with the remains of the six pack under her arm. Shinji, feeling like the burnt, insensitive, stomped on bag of dog shit that he was, headed to the balcony.
"Thank you for sticking up for me Shinji." Said the green eyed Shinji stealing bitch.
Shinji leaned in and gave her a kiss on the cheek.
***
Arrogance. That one word has summed up the life of one Asuka Langley Soryu. Arrogance has made her strive to be the best. However, her arrogance has made her fall from grace that much more spectacular. She hasn't held the highest sync ratio in three years. She can no longer claim to have the highest G.P.A.. She no longer has Shinji.
All she had to do was treat him with a little bit of respect and he would still be wrapped around her finger. Instead he was with her. He's less then twenty feet away, and he's with her, while Asuka is sitting on her bedroom floor, crying her heart out. He had insinuated that she was a whore and a liar while sticking up for a girl he barely knew. He couldn't be bothered with her anymore, he had discarded her like the used up, unwanted and worthless bitch that she was. And no matter how hard she tried, she couldn't hate him for it. Arrogance is not a word that could be currently used to sum up one Asuka Langley Soryu. Broken summed her up much better.
Asuka picked herself up off the floor and exited her room, she looked at the young couple on the balcony. He was against her back with his arms wrapped around her stomach while she had leaned her head back on to his shoulder. For the first time in a long time Shinji looked truly happy. Asuka stifled a sob as she made her way into the bathroom before retreating back to her room.
Whoever was the jackass that coined the phrase 'its better to have loved and lost then to have never loved at all' has obviously never had their still beating heart ripped out of their chest and danced upon by Unit-01. No one has ever puked their guts up for not being in love, no one has ever splattered brain matter all over a wall for not being in love. Not being in love has never made Asuka want to down a bottle of Advil just to make the pain inside go away.
Asuka eventually got hungry and headed to the fridge to get something to eat. An epiphany struck her as she gazed at the large quantity of cheap beer before her. No longer was Misato a raging alcoholic with poor taste, no, in fact, the woman was a genius.
***
The next morning had reared its ugly head as daylight broke threw Asuka's blinds. Shinji had felt guilty for insinuating she was a whore, so he decided that he could still ignore her while waking her up in the mornings. Shinji prepared himself for the verbal abuse that he was about to get, however, he had not prepared himself for what he saw when he opened her door. Lying in front of him was Asuka with puffy eyes and tear stained cheeks, surrounded by eight empty beer cans and a large splatter of vomit.
'When did we have corn?' Thought Shinji as he processed the scene.
"A-Asuka?" No response.
"Asuka?" Still nothing.
Shinji gave her a light shake, as he does, he sees something drop from Asuka's grip. It was a photo of Shinji he didn't know she had.
Shinji guilt level had increased knowing that she had drunken herself into a stupor while clutching his photo. So he went to work cleaning up the cans and the small lake of vomit, then he picked her up and put her in bed. She felt clammy and her breaths were shallow. This frightened him as he was worried about alcohol poisoning.
"Asuka! Asuka!" Her only movement was from the intake and exhaustion of air from her lungs.
"Asuka! Please wake up!" Shinji shook her again.
"Shinji please don't talk so loud." Whispered the hungover German.
"It's time for you to wake up Asuka." Whispered Shinji.
"I feel like shit, please don't make me get up." Asuka pouted.
"You should have thought about that before you drank so much." Reprimanded Shinji.
"I don't need a lecture from you." Asuka covered her ears with her pillows.
"Would you prefer one from Misato?" Shinji asked with a smirk.
"You wouldn't dare." Asuka growled at him.
"Do what you want Asuka, but I'm headed to Tamara's house, so this is your last chance to get up before Misato comes in here."
"Whatever, this is your fault anyways." Asuka said.
"Sure it is Asuka, I forced you to drink last night." Shinji's sarcasm wasn't lost on Asuka.
"You can't blame me for drinking, after all, I'm just some stupid dirty whore, right Shinji?" Mocked Asuka.
"Wow, you've only been up for thirty seconds and you are already in bitch mode. I think that's a new record."
"You're such a bastard." Asuka gave him the finger.
"Flattery doesn't work on me." Smirked Shinji.
"Leave me alone." Asuka said as she rolled over.
"My pleasure." Shinji walked out of her room.
***
Asuka was having a bad day. Her hangover had progressively gotten better but Shinji hadn't been making her lunches, so she has been buying a yogurt from the cafeteria everyday, and eating yogurt everyday gets old pretty quick. Shinji was with Tamara and Hikari was with Toji, that left Asuka alone by the tree at lunch. Being abandoned was nothing new to Asuka, but that didn't make her feel any better about it. She couldn't help herself from starring at Shinji whenever she got the opportunity to do so, but right now, she wished she hadn't. They had been making out for the last few minutes which caused her appetite to disappear and her jealousy to rear its ugly head. She was furious and she would be damned if she was going to let that Shinji stealing whore get away with it. So Asuka walked up to the kissing couple and proceeded to dump her water on Tamara's crotch.
"What the hell was that for Asuka!" Yelled Shinji as he and Tamara stood up.
"You should be thankful Shinji, crabs cant swim" Smirked Asuka with her hands on her hips.
"I don't have crabs you stupid bitch!" Yelled Tamara as she was trying to brush the water off of her skirt.
"Crabs, Chlamydia whatever, either way, your a skanky whore, and you need to stay away from my Shinji!" Announced Asuka.
"Your Shinji? Thats kind of funny considering he was making out with me a few seconds ago!" Now it was Tamara's turn to smirk.
"He was mine first bitch." Growled Asuka.
"And now he's not." She closed in on Asuka and whispered. "You should hear him moaning my name while we make love." Her words were laced with venom.
Asuka's stomach dropped and her body started trembling, tears started trickling down her cheeks as she stared at the green eyed bitch. "You're lying!" Growled Asuka while trying to stop the tears.
"Awe, look at the poor little German girl cry, she's upset that no matter what, I will always be his first." Tamara was glaring at Asuka.
Asuka was pissed to say the least, this whore was sleeping with her Shinji and bragging to her about it! Asuka had to restrain from attacking her, her heart was pounding in her chest and adrenalin was coursing through her body, but she knew that Shinji would hate her if she would hurt Tamara. Asuka closed her eyes and took a couple deep breaths before responding.
"I swear on my dead mothers grave that if you break his heart, I'll b-br..." Is all Asuka could say before her head started spinning. She closed her eyes and tried to balance herself but failed miserably as her legs gave out and she collapsed.
Tamara smirked at the fallen redhead as Shinji rushed to her side.
"Asuka! Asuka!" Shinji was shaking her.
Asuka slightly opened her eyes.
"N-not so hard Shinji" Asuka spoke softly.
"Asuka what the hell happened!" Shouted Shinji.
"I-I don't know." Asuka licked her lips before continuing. "Everything just went black all of the sudden."
Shinji took her pulse as a lot of their classmates started crowding around them. Her heart was still pounding at an alarming rate.
"Alright Asuka, I'm going to carry you to the nurses office, so don't hit me ok?" Shinji said.
Asuka nodded her head as Shinji placed a hand under her thighs and his other hand underneath her back. Shinji grunted as he lifted her up. Asuka placed an arm around his neck and laid her head against his chest.
Shinji's mind was in turmoil, on the one hand he had a girlfriend that was good to him. On the other hand, Shinji couldn't help but notice how right it felt holding Asuka. Which brings up our next lesson.
Perspective. Any person, place, object or even situation can be thought of any number of ways, by any number of people because of their perspective. For instance, if you were to gather a group of people and show them a picture of an orphanage, and then ask them what there thoughts are about said object, you would end up with varying opinions. Their opinions would be based on their perspective. Obviously, if one of the persons grew up in an orphanage, they would have a less ignorant perspective on orphanages then someone who has not. But, that doesn't make the other persons opinion wrong, it just means they have a different perspective.
Shinji was now seeing Asuka through a different perspective. Nothing that felt this good, could be all bad.
When they made it to the nurses station, Shinji had informed the nurse how she had blacked out and had been throwing up this morning. The nurse ran through a simple barrage of test and found nothing out of the ordinary. Her pulse was elevated, but that was to be expected whenever someone participates in a heated argument.
"Whens the last time you have had anything to eat?" Asked the nurse.
"I had eaten a couple bites of a yogurt a few minutes ago." Asuka said.
"How about before that?" Asked the nurse.
"I had a yogurt for lunch yesterday." Stated Asuka
"Whens the last time you have had a real meal?" Asked the nurse.
"I-I don't know, maybe five days ago?" Asuka said meekly.
"Why haven't you eaten?" Asked a worried Shinji.
"I-I haven't been able to keep anything solid down since our fight." Asuka was ashamed to admit to Shinji how him ignoring her had such an affect on the strong willed German.
This statement also had a profound affect on Shinji's perspective of Asuka.
'She cares about me that much?' Shinji thought to himself.
"Do you care to explain why you reek of beer?" Questioned the nurse.
"I spilled a can on me while cleaning up after our guardian this morning." Lied Asuka.
"I am going to call your guardian and suggest you take the next couple days off of school. I am also recommending a liquid diet and bed rest until your stomach has settled and you can eat real food again. And off the record, you can't sweat alcohol out of your pores without having consumed it." The nurse said as she was leaving her office to make the call.
"I'm really sorry Asuka." Shinji grabbed Asuka's hand as he spoke.
"You had sex with Tamara?" Asuka asked with a sad look in her eyes.
"W-who told you that?" Asuka desperately tried not to get mad at Shinji for not answering her question.
"T-Tamara, she said I should hear you moaning her name when you two make love." Asuka had so far kept the tears to a minimum. Shinji didn't want to answer her. He didn't know why, but for some reason he felt like he had cheated on Asuka.
"It's true, isn't it?"
"Asuka, can we please not talk about this here?"
"Please Shinji, I just want to know." Asuka had butterflies in her stomach and her heart was pounding in her chest.
Shinji let out a sigh and nodded his head yes. Asuka looked away to hide the tears, but her chest rising and falling in such a manner told Shinji what she was hiding. Shinji leaned in and put his arms around her, she rested her head on his shoulder. "You said you loved me Shinji!" Asuka said between sobs.
"I do love you Asuka."
"How many times?" Asuka still had her head on his shoulder.
"Asuka..."
"Shinji, how many times."
"Seven." Shinji knew it was useless to try and avoid her questions any longer.
"When was the first and last time?" She felt Shinji tense up.
"The first time was four days ago. And so far, the last time was this morning before school." His words caused Asuka to push him away. Shinji was surprised at Asuka's sudden actions, he placed his hand on her arm only to have it pushed away. "What's wrong Asuka?"
"You were with her this morning Shinji! I don't want you touching me till after your clean!" She had resumed crying.
"I took a shower at her house!" Shinji was trying defend himself, little did he realize that he just dug the hole deeper.
"And I bet she was in there with you!" Anger filled her voice.
"What do you want from me Asuka? How can you be upset with me because I have been intimate with my girlfriend!"
"Because I'm supposed to be your girlfriend! We were supposed to lose our virginities to each other!" Shinji shook his head.
"Asuka, I'm sorry that you feel I have betrayed you, but I haven't. You were the one that pushed me away. There was a time when I wanted nothing more then to be with you, but you keep showing me that you're never going to change. You will never let the real Asuka shine through because you won't open up to anyone." Shinji paused for a second "I don't want to be with the angry redheaded bitch, I want the passionate, opinionated and caring redheaded goddess that I have seen you be from time to time."
"How am I supposed to show you how I am trying to change when you throw everything we had away just because I messed up? I want to be her too, but it's not going to happen over night Shinji!" Asuka was no longer crying, anger had replaced the sadness.
"I've given you three years to change Asuka. Three years. I've suffered through three years of being slapped, kicked, embarrassed, emasculated, humiliated, threatened, beaten, yelled at, pushed around on top of being forced to watch you throw your self at Kaji or hearing you talk about how I don't compare to this boy or that boy! Do you know how it feels to see the person you love fawn over another guy? It tears you up on the inside!" Shinji took a moment to rub his eyes. " I have given you three years of my life that I will never get back. How dare you expect me to waste anymore time on something that isn't going to happen."
"I've waisted three years waiting for you to grow a spine and ask me out! I was pretending to fawn over those boys to make you jealous! I figured that would cause you to take action! But no, Shinji was too much of a wuss to do anything about it! Your not the only person that wasted three years waiting for someone to change!" Asuka shouted in defense.
Shinji gave Asuka a confused look. "I-I don't understand?"
"What don't you understand? Are you confused about all the times you just happened to catch a glimpse of my body? Or maybe all of the times I forced you to take me out to dinner? What about all the times that I have fallen asleep against you while on the couch watching a movie? And who can forget the fact that I haven't gone on a date with anyone except you in three years!"
"I didn't know." Shinji said softly to himself.
"Do you know how many times I laid in bed at night just wishing you would come busting through my door to profess your love for me? Don't you think I got tired of waiting on you?"
"Why didn't you give up on me?" Asked Shinji.
"Because I l-lo... Because I know that what I feel for you is real."
"Then why can't you tell me you love me?" Shinji looked at her with sadness in his eyes.
"It's not something I am going to say to someone that doesn't feel the same way about me." Asuka brushed a stray tear away. "And no matter what words you say, your actions have proved who has your love."
"That's not fair Asuka."
"Don't talk to me about what's fair Shinji. You have no idea what this past week has been like for me." Reprimanded Asuka.
Shinji sat up straight, crossed his arms and shook his head "You make it sound like I enjoy not having you be apart of my life!" Yelled Shinji.
"I'm sure it was really bothering you while you were having sex with her!" Shouted Asuka in response.
"Asuka..."
"Do you love her?"
"Asuka, don't do this." Warned Shinji.
"Do you love her?" Asuka asked again.
"Yes."
"More then me?"
Shinji let out a sigh and pinched his nose. "No, but it's not that easy Asuka."
Asuka covered her face and took a couple moments before responding. "What's not easy about it Shinji?" Asuka removed her hands and looked at him with a tired expression.
"The only reason I decided to date her was so I could forget about you. I didn't plan on falling in love with her, but it happened." Now it was Shinji's turn to look tired.
"Well I hope you two are happy." Asuka turned her head away from him again.
"I would be happier if you would stop trying to hide your emotions from me." Shinji held her chin and gently turned her head towards him. Shinji then took his hands and cupped her cheeks while wiping her tears away with his thumbs. Shinji's heart was pounding in his chest and his stomach was twisting in knots as he gazed into her light blue eyes. They stared into each others eyes for what felt like an eternity. Asuka gently took his hands and removed them from her face. "Please don't be so intimate with me. It's bad enough to know that I have lost you without having to be reminded of what it feels like to be that close to you." Asuka started to sniffle.
Shinji let out a sigh. "I'm sorry for ignoring you, I didn't know you had been waiting for me to change just as long as I had been waiting for you."
"Does this mean you are going to stop ignoring me now?" Shinji gave Asuka a small nod. "I promise to stop ignoring you, and I will cut you some slack when you slip up." Asuka gave him a small nod.
"What about you and Tamara?" Asuka asked.
"I still love her Asuka." Shinji cringed at the sad look Asuka had on her face.
"Will you at least consider breaking up with her to be with me?" Asuka pleaded. Shinji pinched his nose and took a deep breath. "You really are putting me in an awkward place Asuka."
"Please... just think about it?" Asuka begging was something Shinji wasn't accustomed to.
"I will think about it, but no guarantees."
Asuka nodded her head in response. Shinji sat back in his seat and let out a breath. Someone knocking at the door disrupted the silence.
"Come in." Said Shinji.
"Hey kids."
"Hey Misato." Shinji and Asuka said in unison.
"How are you feeling Asuka?"
"I'm not sure right now Misato." Said Asuka.
"From the looks of thing you two are no longer fighting?" Asked Misato.
"You could say that." Said Shinji.
"Well what do you say I take you home Asuka?"
"Please, I could use a nap."
Misato was surprised to see Shinji give Asuka a hug before leaving the nurses office.
"Do I even want to know what's going on?" Misato's gut said she didn't.
"Probably not." Was all Asuka said. Misato just gave her an unsure looking before they left the Nurses office.
Meanwhile....
"Is the scenario on schedule?"
"Yes sir, stage one is complete"
"Very good, when can I expect stage two to be completed?"
"Stage two will be completed in three days sir"
"Very well, do not disappoint me"
"I won't sir"
Tamara hung up her cell phone.
