Author's Note: A is for Angel, RUTryingToIrritateMeToDeath, ..xXx, and Ronsart, thanks for your reviews, I had the crappiest week and you just brightened it oh so much. Along with all you gorgeous people who also read it. Seriously, when I saw all the hits, I just about like died from surprise. I love you guys, for shiz. And this chapter song (if you know it or are a person who actually looks them up) is explained at the end. (don't go ahead and read it otherwise you're going to ruin the chapter for yourself.)
Also, I apologize for not posting this on Friday. I slept over at my friend's house because on Saturday, we went and met Michael Phelps. It was so cool! Without, further ado!
Chapter Song: Secret Life
Artist: Thriving Ivory
Chapter Three
BPOV
It felt like I was being asphyxiated, drowning in my own mind. I couldn't see or feel anything around me, just black. And in the worst sense, this numbing blackness was my saving grace. It was just me, myself and I, no third party.
But at the same time, I wasn't alone. I could feel that cold, crushing grip wrapping itself around every vertebrae in my spine; that choking painful presence.
And with every cranking high accompanies that bottom out, painful crash. The blackness, no longer welcoming, was closing in on me, pushing me back to my reality. If felt like I couldn't breathe, like an elephant was sitting on my chest.
Regaining consciousness, I felt hands on me; touching me.
There were hands on me.
I pushed away the hands, tearing open up my eyes trying to sit up and get away from them.
Standing up, the room started to spin. I could see blurred outlines of people; it looked like Angela, Mike, and that other woman. What was her name, the polite side of my mind asked, while the escaping side growled, it doesn't matter. I looked toward the door, begging silently that I could escape.
Blocking my escape was James, as always. He was struggling against the big burly man who was dragging him out of the room, security moving toward the pair.
Silently, I slid back down the floor, not caring about escaping anymore. I tucked my knees into my chest, hugging them tightly to my small frame and stared straight at my feet. There was nothing I could do anymore. My life was quite literally over.
I never would have fathomed this happening; him publicly coming after me. There was no way to lie about him anymore.
Without a doubt in my mind, I knew that everyone in that room, knowing me for a few years or a few hours had put two and two together to create this terrifying reality of four.
The scars, casts, bruises, marks, hospitals visits, they'd all been craftily tucked away. Just written off as Bella 'falling down again.' But now? Now they all came down under the interrogation light. "How hard did he have to hit her to give her that?" would now be the topic of question at the water cooler discussions.
Breaking me out of my reverie, I felt a hand touch my shoulder. I shrunk closer into myself hoping that if I curled myself into a small enough ball, that I would disappear, escaping the touch. Feeling the hand touch my shoulder again, I shuddered. But this time a voice accompanied it.
"Ms. Swan?" It was a hushed tone, barely audible. Quiet as it was, I could hear him fine. Looking up, I met the slate gray eyes of Carlisle. His face was composed; carefully blank. Yet somehow, his expression looked forced. His eyes somber, like he was reflecting on dark times.
"Ms. Sawn, can you move?" I didn't respond. I shut down further into myself, hoping that hole I could disappear in would still appear.
He sighed. Shifting out of the crouch he reached out and gently detangled me from myself. Cradling me, almost like he was trying to protect me, he carried me out of the room. I didn't know where he was taking me but I didn't really care either. Anywhere away from James was a safe haven.
The rocking motion of his arms was calming, like the ocean's waves. But contradictorily, his heart beat and breathing were racing, like he'd just run a marathon. Carefully, he set me down on a sofa, studying me.
Looking around, I noticed the soft caramel color of the walls, the two leather chairs in front of a mahogany desk. It looked so welcoming, so peaceful, and so warm; Carlisle had taken me to my office. Although it was so familiar, it seemed so alien to me.
Glancing away from me momentarily, he looked through the windows behind the sofa nodding to somebody. Alice walked into the room and started closing the chocolate brown curtains. Getting a fleeting look outside, it was no longer sunny. Back to the usual dreary Seattle downpour. Both giving me sympathetic looks; Carlisle and Alice exited the room.
I rolling over to I was facing the back of the sofa, I curled back into a small ball. Silent tears started running down my face. I clamped down hard on my lower lip to not let any sobs escape, but it didn't work.
The sobs started coming fast, hard, and uncontrollable.
"Why me?!" I whispered aloud to myself. What had I ever done to deserve this? Nothing… absolutely nothing.
Going back into the conference room wasn't an option. I couldn't act like nothing happened, it would be near impossible. Another impossibility would be returning to see James, he'd beat me dead.
Where could I go then? I couldn't stay here. I had no money to afford a hotel room. Charlie's house would be too far to drive to. Besides, I couldn't drop in unannounced looking like I did. Going home with Angela? There would be no way that I was going to put her in more danger than she was already in by just being friends with me.
My mind was going in endless circles, unanswerable questions constantly surfacing, asking for answers that I didn't have. Slowly, my body started to shut down, drifting towards sleep.
* * *
I felt absolutely hideous as I woke up. I was still curled into the same ball position that I fell asleep in, still facing back toward the brown leather back of the sofa. As my brain started to register things, I heard people behind me in the dark room. It was Carlisle and Edward; they were whispering a heated argument.
"Carlisle, we can't just let her go home. We have to do something!" Edward argued. His voice so much emotion to it. He sounded like he was actually meaning what he was saying.
"I know, Edward, I know. I don't like it as much as you do. She reminds me so much of Esme…when I first met her." Carlisle said. He sounded so broken, so remorseful. Nothing like the carefree business man I'd seen a few hours ago.
"Do we have enough for an order of protection?"
"I don't know, I'd have to look into it. Who knows how long that would take." Carlisle sounded sad at having to say it.
Edward sighed; he sounded frustrated. Why does he care? My mind though idly.
"And if he doesn't have a record?" Edward asked.
"Then there's nothing we can do." was Carlisle's solemn response.
"What?!" Edward velvet voice rang out. "What do you mean there's nothing we can do, Carlisle?! We saw him physically try to go after her!"
"No, Edward. We don't have any proof that he was trying to physically hurt her there. For all we know, he just wanted to talk with her."
"We have witnesses! They would agree that he is a danger to her! They saw the look on his face! Hell, she even fainted when he looked at her!"
"How could we argue it wasn't a medical issue that made her faint? We don't know her. I'm sorry, Edward. There's nothing we could do unless we saw him actually lay a hand on her. I'm sorry." he apologized. "It hurts me just as much as it hurts you. It makes me think of what Esme went through. When I saw her for the first time when I was interning in the ER, all I could think about was hurting whoever had done that to her. That's why I stopped pursuing being a doctor and became a lawyer. To help lock up the monsters of this world, those who actually deserve it."
Edward was quiet for a moment, he sighed. "Have you talked to Esme?" his velvet voice asked, defeated.
"Yes," he paused. There was a knock at the door.
"Carlisle?" came a tinkering voice. It sounded like the pixie woman. What was her name? my mind asked again.
"Yes, Alice?" Alice. That was her name.
"Esme is on the phone." She answered.
"I'll be there in a moment, thank you." He said, being politely dismissive. She left, closing the door quietly.
"Can you watch her?" Carlisle asked.
I didn't hear a reply, just someone's retreating footsteps and the door's quiet clicking noise close.
In the midst of trying to process what had just happened, I realized that I hadn't taken a breath. I quickly exhaled and instantly regretted it. The pain in my ribs had increased. I whimpered slightly at the pain. It looked like I'd definitely need to go to the emergency room.
"Bella?" a velvet voice asked; it was Edward. I carefully rolled onto my back and sat up, using that arm of the sofa as a back rest. Sitting up made the pain go up tenfold.
"Hi." I said in a strained voice.
Author's Note: Ok, this was a suck ass chapter I'm not gonna lie. Sorry about this, but I felt like I was dragging it out so i ended it there. So yeah, sorry.
chapter song explanation: The song is pretty much saying how her life was that nobody really knew about. And then with James's outburst, how it's here 'secret life' and how the others want to help her. Especially that's what's running through Edward's mind when he first met her in the previous chapter. Also, it's how others who didn't really pick up on her abuse thought she hid it well with the line 'you dance just like a queen, in spite of all the things you never wanted' So, cool? Good. If you still have any questions about this chapter or anything you don't get at all, with your (hopefully) review, you can ask me or just PM me and I'll answer it as best I can. Thanks for your time lovely! Review? Until next time.
