FIFTY SHADES OF SLYTHERIN

Chapter 3

Disclaimer: JK Rowling's name is not Caroline nor is she so obsessed with Draco Malfoy.

oOo

The next day passed with Hermione mostly staying in bed, fending off the hordes of jackhammer elephants in her head, eating hamburger buns, and making some "very serious life decisions". Soon she had to find a job, she thought, she couldn't live off of bread forever. Yesterday's shopping spree had stolen a quarter of her "savings", and with today's meals, she calculated she had less than five thousand pounds left. (Luckily, the galleon-pound rate was quite high)

And she definitely couldn't stay at this motel, no matter how cheap. She had to find some place around here… With a stroke of inspiration, she decided she would call Jaz tomorrow. Jaz seemed familiar around London, she would know a place. And, with some luck, might feed her, too.

The next morning, Hermione picked up her nearly-dead cell and punched in Jaz's number. It rang for a while, until finally-

"Who the bloody hell is calling at seven in the morning!"

Hermione was about to make a snide remark when she stopped suddenly and blushed. It was a deep, masculine voice…

"Oh, um, I'm sorry, um, is this Jasmin-" Hermione realized she didn't even know Jaz's last name. "-uh, Jasmin's number?"

The stranger on the other end grunted and yelled, "Jasmin! Phone!" A second later, Jaz's groggy voice came on.

"Wuz goinon? Who's this?"

"Her- Natalie. From the other night?"

"Oh, hey. Whatcha need?"

"Wait - who was that guy just now? Boyfriend?"

"Nosy, nosy. No, just some man whore I picked up last night - you know it's true!" Jaz called away from the phone. "Anyway, what's up?"

Hermione needed a story, quick. "Okay, so that night I met you - well, that day my boyfriend broke up with me, d'you remember? So I also kind of lost a place to crash. Like, I'm at a motel right now."

"Oh, poor girl, why don't you come over - oh, you shut up! Why don't you come over, eat some breakfast, and we talk about it? I know some flats around here."

Hermione, living on bread and Advil, had never heard such a wonderful idea before, quickly got up and dressed.

oOo

Jaz lived in a tiny apartment on the twenty-fourth floor of a slightly rundown building - and the elevator was broken. Hermione was very tempted to pull out her wand and just fix it, but thought how suspicious that would be; she might as well apparate directly into Jaz's flat.

Finally, after what felt like a marathon, she pulled herself to Jaz's door.

"Hey, Natalie," Jaz greeted, eyeing Hermione up and down. "What've you been doing - training for the Olympics?"

"Elevator's - broken," Hermione gasped, holding the doorframe for support.

Jaz looked bemused. "You know there's another one in the back, right?"

Hermione closed her eyes. Fortune was not being kind to her this week.

oOo

Soon she was settled at the breakfast bar, a tall stack of pancakes in front of her. Jaz was jabbering on about a new store that had opened a couple blocks away.

"-and the catalogue just came, and there was this amazing gold dress, it was like, strapless, but it was sooo gorgeous, it was kind of beaded at the edges though, I don't know if I have any jewelry to-" her speech was cut short (thankfully) by the entrance of the "man whore".

Hermione gaped at him. Not because he was so attractive (rugged, arrogant-looking, and boxer-clad didn't do it for her) but because he looked so familiar. He had been at Hogwarts, probably, Hermione thought, frantically trying to place him. Whoever he was though, he couldn't recognize her. He couldn't.

The man scowled at the two of them, and reached into the pan for bacon.

"Hello, Blake," Jaz said pointedly.

Hermione's brain was practically whirring. Blake, Blake, Blake…

"This is Blake, what was your name again? Zambia? Anyway, Natalie, Blake. Blake, Natalie," Jaz said oblivious to Hermione's frozen state.

"Pleasure to meet you, Blake," Hermione said tentatively.

He grunted and exited the way he had come.

"Some guys you pick up," she said to Jaz. "Is he, like, mute?"

Jaz shrugged. "He was pretty loud last night."

"Jaz!" Hermione gasped.

"It's true. Maybe his voice is just hoarse right now. Oh, by the way, he has a brother. Maybe you and-"

"No," Hermione said firmly. "I am taking a break from guys right now."

"Well, maybe you'll call it off once you see the guy. He comes to the bar I sing at, and, ohmygod, can you say hottie? I mean, his older brother's also pretty hot, but him? On a scale of hotness from one to ten, I'd say twenty-three at least."

"Uh-huh, well, I'm not inte-"

Jaz started spewing what sounded like a load of made-up crap about the man, Hermione half-heartedly nodding at random times. After a few minutes she began to wonder whether Jaz was a stalker. But then one word caught her attention - "Slytherin."

"Wait - what? Wait, Jaz, what did you just say?"

"He used to work at the Vince Camuto store?"

"No, before that!"

"He plays the ukulele? He goes to a club? He uses Tresemme Professional hair gel? What?"

A strong sense of suspicion gripped Hermione. "What, um, club is he in?"

"I just told you," Jaz said, rolling her eyes. "Slytherin or something weird like that. But am I right or am I right? You're interested in him!"

Let her think that, Hermione thought, mulling this over. Slytherin…

"Hello, earth to Natalie? Yes or no?"

"Hmm?' Hermione said, startled. She really needed to get used to her new name.

"I just asked you," Jaz said patiently, as if explaining to a toddler that one plus one was two. "If you wanted to come meet him with me tonight."

"Who?" Hermione said, frowning.

'For god's sake, do you have short term memory? The prime minister, no, Blake's brother! As in, the hot guy we were just talking about?"

"Oh right." Hermione looked down at her hands. If she was going to start over, she might as well keep it up. "Yeah, sure."

"Seriously? Great, I have a gig tonight, he's definitely going to be there, maybe his friends as well. They're all seriously hot."

Hermione spent the rest of the day with Jaz, talking about outfits and exes and nicknames. It was the most fun Hermione had had in a long time, though if it was all new to her - if she had ever gotten a free day to herself in the past, it would have been spent alone in a library.

oOo

After helping Jaz zip into a tiny glitter-covered thing that could hardly pass as a dress, Hermione shimmied into her own. It was not nearly as provocative as Jaz's, but still, was rather low-cut at the top and high-cut at the bottom. At least she didn't have to wear the fishnet stockings Jaz was pulling on at the moment. She might just have had to kill herself then.

She thought they were ready to go when they slipped their heels on - she was unfortunately very mistaken. Jaz decided that she would go for a full makeup look that night - and dragged Hermione in too.

After she got closer to eyeshadow and lip gloss and mascara and whatever all those damned things were than she would ever want to again in her life, Jaz proclaimed they were ready. They headed out, down that stupid working elevator in the back, and out the building.

Hermione took Jaz's arm, preparing to apparate, then, mortified, jerked it back.

"You alright?" Jaz questioned, striding down the street.

"Oh, yeah… There was a bug." Soon Hermione felt like she would become a master liar. They were coming out of her mouth at a rapid-fire pace naturally.

Jaz drove them in silence to the bar, the same place they had met. Her car, an ancient silver Beetle, groaned to a stop at the curb.

"Go get 'em," Jaz muttered under her breath as she confidently strode into the pub. A rather small crowd was gathered inside, most of them already sloshed.

Jaz sang for a while, Hermione didn't know how long, she was only paying attention to her constantly-being-refilled glass. Finally, Jaz stepped off the makeshift stage and beckoned for Hermione to join her.

They were headed towards a group of young men, chatting and laughing animatedly at a nearby table. As the one closest to them turned at their approach, Hermione froze. Literally, midstep.

It was Draco Malfoy.

Draco Malfoy, the tormenter of her youth, the arrogant, stuck-up little ferret, was sitting in front of her. She physically backed up a step when she realized he was gaping at her like he recognized her.

Escape plans ran quickly through her head. She could run out through the front door once those two guys walked through, or she could go from the back, behind the bar, or through-

"Natalie, these are the Slytherins. Guys, this is Natalie… what's your last name again?"

"Oh, um, Martin," Hermione quickly improvised, still eyeing the exits.

Malfoy was still staring at her as if she was a fairy with green teeth or something. One of the guys next to him (Theodore Nott?) elbowed him in the side, quirking his eyebrows. Malfoy started and looked up with a surprised and a rather confused look on his face.

"Oh, no offense Miss, but I was just thinking,er, you look rather like my mother," he mumbled.

The men howled in laughter. "Ooh, incest!" one of them crowed.

Hermione blushed slightly. Oh, why had she decided to impersonate Narcissa Malfoy? The one person who could recognize the woman, sitting right in front of her!

"None taken," she said regally.

Chairs were pulled out for her and Jaz at their table, and drinks and cards were whipped out. Hermione was horrified when she learned they were playing Truth or Dare - we all know how she is when she's drunk. But she was already a little drunk and decided to join in - a bad decision, but not the first or last that day.

Soon the game was started, and she was plied with drinks straight from the beginning. One of the guys across the table immediately asked her, "Truth or dare, milady?"

Hermione, deciding to make good sport of the night, but sensible side still strong, answered, "Truth."

The man had a devious look on his face as he slyly asked, "Are you a virgin?"

Everyone, most controlling their laughter, turned to Hermione, who blushed furiously. "No," she gritted out.

"Ah," the man smirked, eyebrows raised. "Care to elaborate?"

"No," Hermione said firmly.

"Alright, alright, Natalie, say truth or dare now," the darkest man interrupted over everyone else's laughter. Ah, Hermione thought. So that's Zabini. Personally, she didn't think he was that incredibly hot, but was still, nonetheless, drool-worthy.

"Okay, hmm... Jaz, truth or dare?"

"Dare," Jaz said confidently, flashing a dazzling grin.

"Sit on his lap," Hermione pointed at Blaise. "The whole game."

"My pleasure," Jaz responded, giving him a rather seductive smile.

Quite a few more rounds (and drinks) later, it was Malfoy's turn. He eyed everyone calculatingly, then said, "Natalie. Truth or dare."

Hermione focused (it was quite hard) on the blond, and giggled. "Dare!" It would be a lie to say that she was not drunk.

"Kiss me."

The remaining players who weren't too drunk or passed out or making out whistled and clapped. Hermione unsteadily teetered over to Malfoy and grabbed his increasingly blurrier face before it disappeared. She remembered nothing but the taste of his lips before all went blank.

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A/N: Don't worry, I didn't give up! Sorry I'm writing so slow and short, but quality before quantity, right? And thank you to those of whom have actually reviewed (only three though!) - you guys are amazing, love you =) Keep reviewing!