I find a boom about angels, similar to the one that Rhetta had given me. I purchase it, if I know Rhetta, (and I do) she will be at the lab tomorrow or at least in the stairwell because it is the last place that we spoke, and with tomorrow being my funeral she enter be able to stay away.

I take the book and a copy of my favorite poem (so she knows it's me) and I put it on the evidence table. I sit in her chair and wonder What it is going to be like tomorrow. I wonder What is going through her head right now.

Suddenly I am no longer in the evidence lab, I am now in Ronnie and Rhetta's apartment. I am standing in the living room... it's dark and kind of quiet, but I can hear sobbing and I don't even have to follow it to know that it's her..

Invisibility don't fail me now I plead as I make my way down the hall. I want so bad to let her know that I am here and that I am never going to leave her.. Earl says she needs to do her crying and her mourning in order to accept this. I hate these rules, unlike my life before these are rules that I must follow.

I wonder if I am allowed to attend my own funeral, and if I am does that mean that I should? Did Mary Francis attend her funeral? Did she see how much we mourned and how much we moved her? Now that I'm an angels angels does this mean that I will never get to see her again, or just not now? I really miss her. Am I meant to spend all of eternity as an angel now?

The more I think about these questions the more comfortable I get with the answers. Sure it will be lonely when Rhetta dies, but I will always be able to watch over and protect those we both love and for that reason alone I am at peace with my decisions.

Thinking about everything did make time pass and the next thing that I know the sun is shining through the kitchen window. I hear Rhetta telling the kids to start getting ready because my funeral is at 10. I look at the clock it is 8 now. I know that I had thought about attending my funeral but I hadn't really thought about my funeral. Johnny will most likely officiate, I hope that he's not annoyingly preachy.

My thoughts come back as Rhetta tells Ronnie that she has to run out for a few minutes. I can tell that he wants to help, but he just let's her go. Just like I thought the next time that I see her she is crying in the stairwell.

How do I get her to go to the lab without exposing myself? Earl must sense my tension because next thing I know he is there.

"It's hard isn't it"

"The hardest thing I've ever done Earl"

"Do you remember when Charlie had you? Ham was going to turn left, but he turned right instead. It's actually very simple Grace. Put your hand on her heart and let her feel where you want her to go"

"Really Earl, she has to feel it?"

"Yep, that's it"

I roll my eyes thinking that once again he is full of crap, but I do as he says anyway. It only takes a moment then she jolts up and starts running up the stairs. She opens the doubles doors, flips on the light and she's the book. She flips it open and on the front page is the poem and today's date. With tears in her eyes she looks around and I know she's looking for me. I want to scream that I am right here, but I still have a few hours until I can do that.

For the first time in two days for a moment Rhetta wears a small smile. In the privacy of the lab she knows that I haven't left her. She clears her throat, and I know that she is going to speak. I also know that she is going to speak to me.

"Oh God Grace, What did you do? Why did you do it? How could you leave me? You promised! Remember when I was seven and the kids in school kept picking on me because of my glasses, you stood up for me Grace and you promised, you promised you'd never leave me, but you did! Today is so screwed this shouldn't be happening.. I so wanna kick your ass right now!." She screams as her anger turns into sadness again.

I knew that hard would remember and I can't blame her for wanting answers. I can't wait to be able to give them to her.

"Forgive me Grace, I'm angry. I'm angry at God, I'm angry at you, Damn I'm even angry at Earl. I hate that I feel this way, but I really wish you were still here!"

My hand reaches up and wipes the tears from my own eyes. My death broke her. Rhetta has always been my rock and I broke her. I know Earl told me to wait, but I just can't anymore