I don't own the Secret Circle. I own Amanda

Nick POV

When Faye threw her apple peel over her shoulder no one was expecting what would happen. She tossed her blood red peel and there in the ground it started twisting and turning and formed the initials N.A. My initials. Amanda's eyes went wide and I could feel my blood boiling. "Really Faye?" I said annoyed. "Using magic to continue whatever vendetta you have over Amanda? Not cool" Deborah spoke up. I looked down at Amanda and she was seething. I held my arm tightly around her shoulder. Faye let out an evil laugh "who said I used magic?" she tried to say innocently however there was a gleam of guilt in her eyes. "You can't tell the entire group that you didn't use magic?" Amanda said angrily finally shrugging out of my grip. Faye headed toward Amanda and they were face to face "Maybe I did and maybe I didn't" face said coyly and let out another laugh. "You did and you used it for personal gain and once you have to pay the consequences for that I'll be the one laughing" Amanda said raising her voice slightly. I just watched as she stood up to Faye. The strength in Amanda was always something that amazed me' "well, little let's just say game is on" Faye said pointing a red topped finger at Amanda and Amanda swiped faye's hand out of the way and got right in her face "Bring it Bitch" Amanda bellowed and walked away. "what's wrong little girl you don't like competition?" Faye called after her. "You could never compete with her" I snarled at Faye and went after Amanda.

Amanda was a few feet ahead of me and when she got close to the shoreline she plopped herself into the sand. I walked slowly over to her and I could see that she was angry by the way she dug her fingers into the cold, wet sand. I sat down next to her and put my arm around her. She shook her head no and shrugged my arm off. I could sense anger, fear and hurt emanating from her and I didn't know what to say. Finally she looked at me with a cold look in her eyes. One that I had never seen before but I had known all too well from my own reflection when I was a different person, before Amanda. The silence was hard to deal with. I didn't know what was going on in her head and I didn't know what to say. I knew none of this was my fault however I understood why she was so angry. If I was in her shoes I would have punched Faye right in the nose. "Amanda" I started to say and she shook her head again. "Nick, I think it's time you tell me what exactly the terms of the arrangement you had with way Faye were" She said coldly. I sucked in a breath. I really didn't want to hurt her by telling her these things but I had to remember that it was part of the past and as Aunt Grace had said at the cemetery after Sean's service I needed to face the past in order to move forward into the future. I guess I just now realized that that meant my complete past not just dealing with my parents' deaths. "well" she said impatiently staring right into my eyes. If looks could kill well I would have been dead right there on the beach and it broke my heart to see her looking at me like that. I was already concerned about the bond weakening and now this. I had to get it out no matter what her reaction would be. "well a few years ago, not long before Cassie moved to New Salem, Faye had been trying to go after Sally's boyfriend Jeffery Lovejoy who was killed by Black John. She was all pissed off at the end of the school dance our junior year because he wouldn't give her the time of day. Faye, Suzan and Deborah decided to go get drunk and asked if I wanted to come. Of course I was down for that. Anything to numb the pain I felt" I said. I paused for a minute. Remembering this night in my mind and what a mistake it had turned out to be. "anyway, Faye was bitching about having to scare tactics and love potions to get the outsider boys to hang out with her. I mentioned that she may want to start going after the single boys and not the ones with girlfriends. That was mistake number one" I admitted. Amanda was watching me the coldness drifting from her eyes. "so she said your single Nicholas. I said yeah and then out of nowhere she kissed me and I didn't protest. Mistake number two." I saw anger return to Amanda's face. It seemed like she was trying to calm herself down but I could understand the thought of the person you love being with anyone else was not an easy one to deal with. "then Faye said how about whenever I can't find an outsider to play with I play with you and I agreed. Mistake number three. So for a little while Faye and I would hook up here and there. That went on for a little while until Cassie moved here and I saw the way Faye treated her. I started to really despise Faye and one night she came over to my house wanting to hook up and I told her that I was done with the arrangement. To say she didn't take it well was an understatement. She started terrorizing Cassie, Sally and Jeffrey. I never went back though. I want nothing to do with her. I don't care what white Morris said I think she's evil to the core" I said finishing my story. Amanda looked up at me her eyes were wet but no tears were falling "did you sleep with her?" she choked out. "oh no! not at all" I said wrapping my arm around her and to my surprise she didn't shrug me off. "She wanted to and tried to seduce me several times but it didn't feel right. The entire arrangement felt wrong. It was only something I did to try to escape the pain that was in my heart" I admitted. She looked up at me "Amanda you are the only woman I have ever been with in that way and that's the way it's going to be for eternity" I smiled softly. "nick you are such a decent guy I just don't understand how you could have been with someone like that and I don't understand why she's being like this" Amanda said with distance in her voice. "Faye likes to win and with me, she lost big time. She looks at you and sees someone so much stronger than she has who has something she will never have" I answered. "What's that?" she asked curiously "love" I said simply. Amanda rested her head on my shoulder but I could tell there was still so much on her mind. "I love you so much you know" I said kissing her head. She looked up at me and smiled a half smile "I love you too Nick" she said pecking my lips. She was still distant and it was really uncomfortable. "are you ok?" I asked her sincerely. "I'm fine" she said "thank you for you honesty but I'd really like to just go home now if that's ok". I didn't say anything I just got up and started walking away and I lit a cigarette. This distance was killing me and I had that nagging feeling that this wasn't the end of the uneasiness.

We walked back to Number Two in silence. When we got into my bedroom she grabbed clothes and went right into the bathroom without saying a word. I heard the shower running and got into bed. I needed to sleep away the pain that I was feeling. Pain that should be familiar to me but no longer was. It was killing me that my past was affecting my present this much. I turned down the lights and rolled over when I heard the shower go off. I pretended to be asleep because I didn't want to face the distance that was between me and Amanda. I could feel myself shutting down, my walls closing in and ice taking over me. I was trying to fight it and just as I thought I was losing this battle I feel her climb into bed "nick are you awake?" she whispered as electric currents were sent through my shoulder where she placed her hand. I rolled over so I facing her "I love you" she said simply with a small smile on her face. I started stroking her face "I love you too" I said. "I'm sorry I got so mad. It wasn't at you it was at- well I don't want to talk about her right now" Amanda sighed. "if you are not mad at me then why do distant?" I asked honestly. She thought for a moment her brow wrinkled "I just got so upset by what her apple peel revealed. I also have realized in the past few weeks that there is so much about you I don't know. I know it's silly because you aren't going to learn everything about someone in 2 months I just can't get white Morris' words out of my head you know, what he said about the bond" she admitted softly. "I've been think about that too, however, isn't this what a relationship and even marriage is supposed to be? Two people who love each other learning and growing together?" I asked. She smiled "definitely" and kissed me softly "so let's do this, let's not think about white Morris or anything else having to do with the prophecy. Let's just focus on the present starting with finishing our house and planning an August wedding" she finished. I touched my forehead to hers "I like that idea" I said kissing her again. "oh and we are celebrating your birthday" she smiled wickedly. "fine" I surrendered quickly as I knew no one would ever let me not celebrate "and Faye's not invited" she added resting her head on my chest. I didn't protest. I didn't want to see her just as much as Amanda didn't want her around, however, I knew that would cause a problem within the circle. A problem I didn't know if any of us were ready to handle.