Chapter 3: Dishonorable Fight Class
The sun was shining, the wildlife didn't really exist around Beacon because of all the explosions, the grass was growing, and honestly he kinda wanted to move because man he hated it.
Least it was leaning on the colder months it seemed, so he wasn't melting, god he hated nature.
Good to look at, itchy and sweltering to touch, he'd prefer to exercise his god given right to use the A/C.
Either way he decided to pop a squat and lay on the ground with his arms crossed behind his head like a dumbass, but he needed to think.
Who needed to think?
He did, T, Dove Bronzewing now technically now he guessed.
Thinking on it, as he had been thinking- though his thoughts before the moment were more focused on school crap and wrangling his mind onto the correct topic- he probably shouldn't be so…'get over it loser' about the whole other body thing.
The other two probably actually liked their body's, not everyone had a lot of hate and disgust directed at themselves.
Honestly this entire situation was a...full on improvement on his everything.
And he...kinda liked that honestly.
Albeit, what...did he want to do with himself?
He didn't pretend he'd ever end up back home, he was dead, so to speak, back home. No use crying over it, least until say, going back home dropped on his lap.
Then he'd feel pretty emotional, but otherwise, oh well.
He...wasn't sure he wanted to screw with the story, as it was supposed to happen, least without talking to the other guys about it. He...didn't really want to get involved.
Dying pointlessly whenever any of the bad guys breathed on him wasn't really his idea of a good time, and they might send assassin's if they realize what he may or may not have done.
So...what to do?
He guessed...attempt to live the American dream?
Find a steady job, a girl, have 2.5 kids, maybe pick up some hobbies or something.
That or get really into training since it was rad as hell to actually be an anime character, even if he'd probably never stack up to all the other characters without some mystical sensei type person accelerating his training by 1000% faster than normal, ah la Kenichi.
No reason he can't do both…
So training and flirting, not that bad he guessed, though on options...not really much of any, all things considered, either too extroverted, bitchy, going to die, out of his league, or basically already taken and/or not his type in terms of the girls available at Beacon, and he had no idea when the hell any of the other girls from the other schools would arrive.
He kinda wanted a girl who could protect him honestly because hell if he was probably ever gonna stack up to the wacky anime levels of anything in the world, so he'd prefer not to try his hand at the normal girls, and aim for huntresses.
Plus huntresses were hot and fit and he was in fact not a cold blooded lizardman eunuch.
So...guess he'd bum around Beacon on the search, and maybe see if he can't schmooze the out of towners once they arrive.
With that little bit of meditation, he supposed he should get his ass off the frickin' ground and get to combat class, which he'd probably look forward to more if he was actually Dove, or well, someone with any inkling of skill in the art of beating the snot out of someone else.
But hey, maybe he'd come to like it sooner rather than later.
[Linbrook losoors]
Glynda Goodtits stood in the center of the massive arena, scanning the smaller class she had to teach for this day's combat class, tapping away at her scroll as she lazily and robotically read off the matchups.
"Today's sparring biases are, Pyrrha Nikos challenging Jaune Arc-"
"Accepted!" Jaune threw his hand up.
"Cardin Winchester challenging Dove Bronzewing."
Dove kinda wished he could say the non censored Frick word.
God frickin' dammit.
Cardin glared at Dove across the room, mouthing, 'accept, damn it' to this moment's target for a revenge beating.
Dove rolled his eyes, weirding Cardin out at seeing the fox eyed boy had eyes and they did eye things, T spoke up "Accepted." he says with a sigh, better Cardin than Yang he guessed.
"Ruby Rose challenging Weiss Schnee."
Yang punched Ruby in the arm, making her yelp, "Ow!" she rubbed her arm, "Yang-"
"You were supposed to fight Sky!" Yang glared.
"I don't wanna fight Sky!" Ruby moved one seat over from Yang, looking at her feet, "He's a bully, Yang!"
"So? That just means you get to hit him, smart one!"
"Accepted!" Weiss shot up, making Yang growl.
"Tabby Troy challenging Russel Thrush."
"Accepted?" Spike chimed in, assuming that's how it worked...who the hell was that anyway? Probably just some background character Russel had beef with-
And then it dawned on him who it could be.
"Yeehaw I spose." T mumbled, having...a vague gameplan.
He was screwed if Cardin could just beat him through raw physicality, a strength type meathead character.
Or just through not being a rube and having some skill, but he hoped the guy had giant stupid holes in his combat skillset like Ruby.
[Linebreak Losers]
"Russel..." Tabby growled, a large smile on his face-it was indeed who Spike thought it was, the boy he had sanded in the face, this time he had his weeb-ass samurai armor on, a weeb-ass katana strapped to his side, but no helmet.
Thankfully, no helmet.
He turned his body fully to Spike, the sun gleaming from his blade as he produced it from its scabbard, "You know being gay isn't a god damn disease, right?!" he yelled, "I can't just get it from just hanging out with my brother!"
"I'm sorry?" Spike blinked.
"You called me a faggot in the hall! Now you're insulting my brother too? Now you're really done for!"
"Language, Troy!" Glynda scolded.
"S-sorry...ma'am…" Tabby winced.
"I didn't literally mean 'gay' you comic book villian, you know what? Nevermind," Spike sighed, raising his fists and bracing himself, "Let's just go, Pussycat!"
"Russel, for my sister's honor and so that I may sleep like a baby at night, I am going to throw you into the depths of despair!" He pointed his blade with one arm, fixated on his 'rival', demanding, "Take out your daggers, Red!"
"Mono a mono, come on!"
"Pfft, once this blade is drawn, it must taste blood!"
The bell sounded, prompting for Tabby to lunge at Russel like he was an absolute madman trying to chop a tree down from as many angles as possible-
Spike grit his teeth, seeming to just take the attacks(though he was actually trying to dodge all of them), feeling the basically pointless blade bounce off his aura leaving nothing but a wave of pain with each strike, he knew he couldn't do this forever, so with a quick step forward he lashed out-
Fist connecting with the blur of movement, right in his chestplate, he was knocked a tad off balance from the decently placed punch-but his aura was unscaved.
Tabby jumped back, slipping into wrath guard, and readied a massive strike towards Russel's head-making him crouch down slightly and-
'Oh Jesus Christ what the hell happened to my legs?!'
Russel was tripped up, falling towards the ground, Tabby had feinted high and dropped low to take out Spike's legs-his speed making such a sudden change in blade placement actually possible.
Russel flinched, before he had even landed, Tabby reared his blade back, reading to thrust the point into his stomach as he plummeted, he threw his arms up and-
"Huh?" Tabby was suddenly jerked down-almost to the ground-by his sword, Ruseel had grabbed his katana by the blade and held on as tight as he could. The kitty cat blinked, actually perplexed by this odd move, thinking to himself, 'did this madman actually just grab a sword?!'
Spike held onto it, not letting go, not making any move to follow up-just held it in place.
"Let go of it, you stupid human!" Tabby demanded, starting to jerk on the handle, trying to force it out of his grip, "Who actually grabs a man's Tachi?"
He grit his teeth, pulling as hard as he could against Russel-who was using his dead weight against the blade, and was it getting...warm?
Warmer and warmer as they played a game of tug of war over the sword, warmer and warmer until it was hot-hotter and hotter until it was burning!
"Argh, Russel!" Tabby yelled, "Let it go!" He started screaming every word in pain as the sword started to glow with heat, Spike did his best to hide the fact that he was holding onto a red hot metal object. Even with the odd heat, neither combatant let go-until Russel did.
All at once, Russel dropped the blade, Tabby feel back sharply onto his ass with the burning katana in his palm-and Russel was on top of him as soon as he fell, gripping the weapon once more.
Tabby trying his damndest to keep his weapon away from Russel was exactly what he wanted, and now Russel was free to wail on the Faunus's face, since his defence was completely abandoned.
Russel had produced one of his blades in icepick grip as he moved to mount the Tabby, jabbing it into his throat, his eyes, and sometimes his temples-over and over and over and over!
Tabby, now holding his eyes shut instinctively, feeling harsh metal ram into his windpipe and eyelids with the force of a sledgehammer, a burning piece of steel in his hand that he was trying to keep from Russel-and the dagger was getting hotter with each jab-aura or not, his body was freaking out on its own. Even if he knew he wasn't going to lose an eye, or have the knife go through his throat, it didn't matter, he felt like it could happen.
He let go of his burning katana, moving his arms in front of his head and trying to push Spike's arm aside each time it hammered, but since he couldn't see-he couldn't get a beat on where the blade was at.
Spike chucked the hot sword off to the side, not actually wanting to use it.
He did eventually get Spike off him from half a minute of trial and error, managing to push him off to the side and stumble to his knees, holding his face and throat in complete agony...who knew how many times spike had hammered into those weak spots individually? Thirty times for each one? Fifty Times? A hundred times?
Spike reached into his pocket, waiting for the Faunus to move his hands, open his eyes, and make a move-
And when he did, Spike blinded those eyes once again-with sand!
"Oh, come on!" Tabby screamed, moving his hands in front of his face again, then down again to try to defend himself, but it was no use-without being able to see Spike, he was free to force him to the ground-
Spike found a space in-between Tabby's lower plates, ramming his not red hot dagger into it, he then booted the Faunus in the face to knock him over, abd stomped the knife once-twice-three times-moving it deeper into his armor with each strike.
"Forfeit! I forfeit!" the Faunus caved, covering his face like a defeated animal, Spike instantly stopped, dropping to his knees, catching his breath…
"You really don't train your boys how to fight people, do you?" Spike looked up and questioned Glynda, a large smile on his face…
Glynda...was pissed...and disappointed...but mostly pissed.
"What do you even call that display, ?" Glynda huffed, she wasn't going to take action, nor could she, as much as she wanted to disqualify Spike for fighting like such a...hooligan, there weren't any rules in battle.
Spike fell onto his back, seriously surprised her could muster anything close to a victory, but RWBY characters weren't known for fighting smart, or being smart for that matter.
"I call that, winning," Russel chuckled, rubbing the parts of his body that still hurt, "Barely...if he didn't try to fight over his katana so desperately, he probably would've destroyed me," Russel sat up, crawling over to the cat that was still trying to cope with sand in his eyes, patting him on the shoulder.
The crowd was a mix of claps, glares, baleful utterances, a background character booed, and Nora cheered-having been thoroughly entertained by the scuffle. Yang liked his hustle as well, though to a much lesser degree.
"Get some grappling and fist-fighting in, and then you'll best me every time," Spike suggested, and started to work his dagger from his opponent's armor, "Hold still, I don't know what your aura's at."
"Shut up! You only won because-"
"Yeah, I know," Spike chuckled, cutting Tabby off, "You're better than me, act like it," Spike worked the hot knife from the armor, placing it in his belt and praying it cooled off before it got through his aura.
Spike picked the slightly larger male up and started to carry him out of the arena, "I'm gonna take him to a sink to get this sand washed out, be right back!" he waved to Goodwitch as he let himself out.
[Linebreak Winners]
Spike stole his fricking plan and now he sat in the locker room with his thumb up his ass, armor crappily tied onto himself, and a hand full of a sword he didn't even know how to use.
Thank goodness for the lack of cameras, and the soundproofed walls that concealed the gunshot when he figured out how the thing worked.
He...really had no resources, his attempt at constructing an IED wasn't going to work because he didn't have a pair of pliers and also handling dust munitions is dangerous as hell and he didn't have the time.
So...one sword, the thing had two barrels and had a single trigger, and shot around 12 shots of low caliber dust munitions before he had to pull a got dang mag out and clank it in.
The gun was basically an afterthought, and he wondered what kind of fetish Dove and Ren have with shitty useless weapons that really would only work on civilians and literally nothing else that they would be fighting on a daily basis.
Nonetheless he had a sword and a pea shooter to fight Cardin who might as well be a Dark Souls boss and he's the cuck game reviewer who doesn't know how to read the tutorial and jump properly.
Maybe...he should treat this like a Dark Souls boss?
That...probably would be a better plan, if he remembered to actually take into account the fact that Cardin wasn't a rube with like 5 attack patterns.
The door of the locker room was almost kicked open, in poured, Spike Spiegel carrying some space pussy (Read: Some rando asshole who called himself spike carrying a catman ).
"I spent ten minutes looking for the men's room, forgetting the fact that these are co-ed locker rooms for some unholy reason," Spike commented as he walked in and noticed his team mate.
"No you didn't, what?" Tabby questioned, having calmed down as he waited for the sweet release of water in his eyes to fight off the sand.
"Ssshhh...comedy, my boy," Spike hushed.
"I'm only gonna complain when some girl breaks all of my ribs with one punch." T said jokingly with a grin- slipping into a cheerful facade naturally like he usually did.
Cody dropped the kitty to his knees, turning a sink on and forcing his face into its running water, before backing off seeing that the teasing didn't fan out like he wanted, Tabby let himself linger in its full brunt, before pulling out, "Oh, that happened to a guy last week! I thought you were there for that."
"Yang?" Russel questioned, quirking a brow.
"Yang," Tabby confirmed, his eyes now clean of Anakin's worst nightmare.
"Yang." T joined in, crossing his arms and nodding his head sagely as his eyes shut.
"Yang?" a fourth, feminine voice joined in, having slipped into the locker room after Spike and his apparent nemesis.
"You know, the girl's locker room is two doors down," Spike joked, a joke she was sure to not get.
"That's my brother…" Tabby noted.
"Wait-nonono, you're messing with me, right?" Spike took a step back, now staring 'her' up and down to confirm 'her' gender.
He was the smallest in the room, standing a few inches shorter than Russel, long hair brushed back into a long braided ponytail-mostly white, with black and muted orange mixed in like blots of natural colored hair dye were dropped onto him from overhead-some patches having lines and stripes like it was a tabby's pattern, some not.
He had calico cat ears to match his hair, though they mismatched, one with tabby stripes, one with plain coloration, like they were sewn together from different patches and cloths. He wore the standard Beacon uniform-albeit the female one, and wore a slight bit of makeup normal for a school day. His eyes were the same color as Tabby's-with a slight flame to them as he glared at Spike.
Spike swallowed, his mouth now dry, turning his vision away, pretending to scan the room for his locker.
"From Yang Xiao Short to Yang Xiao Long." T said pointing at Spike, before hopping up "Anyways I'm going to go die, cya guys at lunch." as he walked out.
"Why was he carrying you?" Tabby's brother looked to him, crossing his arms, quirking a brow.
"He was getting me to a sink," Tabby rubbed the back of his neck, being slightly intimidated by his shorter, girly brother, "He threw sand in my eyes."
"He threw sand in your eyes?!"
"Calm down, Cali, we just finished a fight, you can beat the crap out of him later," Tabby stood up, water still dripping from his hair onto the floor, "I'm gonna get to class before Glynda gets sus' about our absence," he slipped by his brother, into the hall…
Spike turned his vision back, simply waving at the femboy before trying to follow-
Cali stuck his hand out, pressing it firmly into Russel's chest, stopping him in his tracks, eyes narrowing as he cracked his neck, "This is for my sister, dickwad…"
Spike reached up, gripping the offending and ripping it from his chest, shoving the bottom of his palm into the trap's chest to force him a couple steps back as he got into stance. He reached to his belt, pulling his daggers free and tossing them both aside.
Cali smirked, "Remember what happened last time?" he giggled a bit as he balled his hands into fists, taking on a textbook stance straight out of school, and while Spike didn't recognize the martial art-it was very clearly practical and practiced, "I'm not gonna lose to some cock-sure, limp-dicked faggot who fights with pretty little knives and not his hands!"
Spike gulped.
[Linebreak Faggots]
"I have no idea how to stretch." He said to himself out loud, it was odd hearing a different voice, but he'd get use to it, but aside from that, he tried to emulate every stretch he'd seen from shows and other such media, and the few he'd picked up on his own, limbering up before the fight.
"Hope you're ready to eat floor Dove." Cardin said with a sneer as he rested his mace on his shoulder and glared across the arena.
"Oh and bite the pillow? Oh Cardin, how forward, and in public? Kinky." Dove said grinning and wiggling his eyebrows as he stood up proper...well it was basically wielding his sword like a baseball bat but at least he was 'combat ready!'.
"Dove!" Glynda spoke in a higher voice, rankled about it as all heck.
"Yeah yeah we're all adults don't be a grandma or a virgin about it and slap the execute Dove button." Dove said rolling his eyes at her as she huffed and pressed the button on her scroll that rang the starting bell.
Dove rushed forward to get more towards the center, stumbling a bit here and there as Cardin rushed to meet him, the two getting close to the center when Dove slid to a halt, grabbed his sword blade and braced, Cardin grinning and lifting his mace hi-
And then Dove just...dodge rolled?
It was clumsy as all hell, but Cardin stopped his swing and had to turn on a dime to followed him, coming with an underhand swing as Dove came to a stop and rose to a kneeling pos- and he rolled! Again!
He didn't follow this time, observing as Dove rose up-
He didn't expect to be peppered by the barrage of shots, his mace slow to react- Dove, Dove didn't do that…?
From kneeling he placed the flat of his palm on the top of his blade, bracing it as he let off a staccato of shots at the powerhouse as he rose, a lot missed, but some managed to let out a satisfying noise of shots hitting, his sword clicking to inform him it was out of shots already- which was pretty annoying.
He stood back up fully, and around then Cardin decided sitting around was stupid and he was gonna hit this little dweeb.
Again, Dove did something weird, tossing his sword to his left hand, and then held his sword out as far as he could get it to reach, his body standing turned to the side, his eyes glued to the ground or something he didn't know.
He slid forward, stepping confidently as he reared his mace back to smack the sword out of his hand- the thing seemed to be pointing at his face for some reason- and then his mace met air.
What?
And then he was smacked in the face by something that felt vaguely like a girly slap, his vision engulfed by sword as he flinched, swinging back to smack it out of his face but again missing- his vision regained, he saw Dove leaning back, both hands on the handle of his sword, nowhere near where he was swinging.
He realized pretty late that he'd panicked and over swung when he couldn't bring his mace back to block, Dove's sword stabbing hard into-
He dropped his mace, gripping his dick and crumpling like a building getting demolitioned by a wrecking crew.
He lay there, a couple tears threatening to leak out as he stared at the floor- after a moment getting the willpower to look up and see…
'Where'd Dove go?' was his thought, accompanied with his head getting smashed into the ground- and then a familiar feeling of a dust explosion.
Dove had just played one of those 'Test of Strength' games with his head, having easily figured ?out the dust function given it was a got dang button right above the handle.
Cardin was blasted away as his mace was blasted the other- Dove not having the strength to hold onto the thing's recoil as he fell over and it flung itself into the opposite wall.
"That's right folks, ayhyuck." He grumbled, getting up and grabbing his sword, slapping in a new mag and keeping an eye on Cardin, then his eyes strayed to the aura board.
It was way too full for how hard that felt.
Cardin rose with a pissed off look, glaring daggers-
"I forfeit!" Dove said happily, resting his sword onto his shoulder.
"What?" Glynda said, confused look overtaking her pissed one at the dick stab.
"What?" Cardin said, outrage in his voice as he looked flabbergasted
"What?" T said, looking at the two like they were stupid "I don't see a point in continuing." he said, rolling his eyes "I can't output enough damage before Cardin would be able to figure out how to deal with my tricks and evasions." he said with a shrug "I don't want to waste my time on pointless fighting when I could be productive." he said, turning and walking away.
"C-Cardin...wins…" Glynda said, too thrown off by the change in fighting style and the abrupt quitting to really argue.
"What?" Cardin echoed, gritting his teeth, "Don't think you spared yourself the beating…" he muttered.
[Linebreak Losers]
