Disclaimer: We do not own Kingdom Hearts…. If we did the pairings would be cannon! (And Vexen wouldn't exist!)
Warnings: This story contains malexmale relations and mentions of various forms of past abuse. Don't like, don't read. :] (And this chapter has lots of language *shakes finger at Axel*)
Rest in Peace
Chapter Three
Doubt And Trust
Roxas opened his eyes to see black. If he'd have been anywhere else, he would've started screaming that he'd turned blind. But, he recalled quickly where he was and Roxas realized that his arm was thrown across his eyes to block out the light.
He moved his arm and blinked. Now he was pretty sure he'd start screaming. First, there was a weight on his legs. A lot of weight. He craned his head up and saw Axel's legs thrown over his own. And then, there were arms around his shoulders and his side was pressed against some very toned abs. He felt a chin resting on top of his head. Roxas blinked and willed the blush on his face to go away.
Axel didn't shift his body even though he knew that Roxas was awake. He was used to waking at the slightest hints of stirring when Demyx stayed with him. He hadn't planed to move at all since he could tell by the tenseness in Roxas's body that the boy was not comfortable.
'Don't wake up. Don't wake up.' Roxas pleaded at Axel in his mind. He stiffened and his eyes widened as an alarm clock blared from Axel's side of the room.
'Damnnit!' the red head grumble mentally. He lifted his arm and reached into his back pocket. From it he withdrew a quarter. He cracked open one eye before hurling the quarter with startling accuracy at the alarm clock. The piece of metal hit its mark and the noise immediately ceased. Instead of wrapping his arm around Roxas again he settled it on his own side.
"Good morning, Rox," he said softly with his eyes once more closed.
Roxas instantly relaxed. The only reason he was uncomfortable was the thought that Axel would find this position weird. As odd as it was, he was a really comfortable around Axel. He knew that it could be bad, but Roxas figured that you couldn't knock something until you tried it. And he could try trusting without reason.
"Mornin', Axel," he drawled, still in the stage between being fully awake and asleep. His words slurred together and what was supposed to come out as 'What time is it?' came out as "Watimizit?"
-o-o-o-o-o-
At some point in time Demyx had scooted his body back to press against his boyfriend, despite that he hadn't stopped crying for nearly the whole night. He may have drifted off once or twice during the night but he was certain that tears had still leaked from his eyes through his sleep.
The alarm on his phone rang out sharply and he shut it off quickly. He figured it had probably woken up Zexion, but there was nothing he could do about that now. He pulled back the covers on the opposite side of the bed from the man and crawled out. "I have to go see Axel," he murmured softly not wanting to lie any further to Zexion.
Zexion stirred slightly and opened his eyes in a haze. He rested his chin on the mattress and looked up at Demyx. He frowned and stood up, sliding over the edge of the bed. He half-tackled his boyfriend in a hug around his torso from behind.
"Demyx..." He mumbled into the back of Demyx's shirt. Zexion looked up at the back of Demyx's head and tried to hold back tears. "Stop doing this to me..." He pleaded.
Demyx stiffened immediately and began trembling moments later. Sudden movement, especially when he hadn't seen them coming terrified him. He couldn't bring himself to speak. A pathetic whimper escaped his throat.
His phone was thankfully in his hand already. His finger shifted and he sent Axel a blank text.
Zexion sighed, releasing his grip on the blonde. He moved in front of the blonde, no longer restraining his tears.
"Demyx... I don't know what's wrong... I want to know what's wrong. I can't... I can't deal with this anymore. Christ, if you're so buddy-buddy with Axel, then why don't you freaking date him?" He mumbled, hurt and confused. Zexion shook his head and turned on his heel, walking out the door and letting it click closed softly behind him.
-o-o-o-o-o-
"It is time for you to get up or you'll never make it to your first class on time," Axel said with a grin. He reached up and ruffled Roxas hair affectionately before climbing over the blond to get off the bed. As soon as his feet hit the floor he bent and picked up the blonde's phone.
"Here. You might want this, eventually. That adorable brother of yours might call," Axel said with a smirk before he tossed the phone on the bed beside the blond. He stretched lightly and popped his back with a satisfied groan before dropping his hands again.
Roxas laughed and picked up his phone to turn it on."Yeah, adorable, my ass," he scoffed. He frowned at the screen as it flashed '14 Messages - Hayner'.
Axel had no more then made it to his bed when his phone rang. With a sigh Axel picked it up and flipped it open. On the screen there was a blank text from Demyx. "Shit," the red head grumbled. "Hey Roxas I gotta go. Dem's having one of his spells. If I'm not gonna be back in time to help you, I'll call someone and send them over to show you your classes. Ok?" He couldn't really wait for Roxas reply and gave the blond only seconds before he was out of the room.
Roxas's head snapped up at Axel's words. "Al -" The door shut. "- right..." Roxas sighed and folded his legs underneath him on the bed. He dialed his voice mail and started listening to Hayner's pleading messages.
"Look, Roxas, I -" Roxas clicked delete.
"Rox, I can explain -" Roxas hit delete.
"Roxas -" Delete.
"It wasn't like he mean to..." Roxas stopped to listen to this one. "He told me that he didn't mean to, Rox! He was drunk! He didn't -" Blood boiling, Roxas snapped his phone shut and refused to listen to any more messages.
-o-o-o-o-o-
It was a short walk to Demyx's room for Axel's long legs. He didn't bother knocking he knew Demyx wouldn't answer anyway. When he opened the door Axel found his friend crumpled into a sobbing ball on the floor.
"Dem," he called softly, not wanting to frighten the teen more. He knelt beside him.
Watery eyes looked up at the red head before the blond launch himself into Axel's arms. "I- I..."
"Shh," Axel soothed sitting back and rocking Demyx back and forth. "Relax, then we will talk." Demyx nodded as a reply.
It took ten minutes of soothing before Demyx was able to talk and when he finally was what had happened spilled from his mouth in unabridged detail. Axel did his best to curb the resulting angry feelings he felt and not show them to the blonde. By the time Demyx was finished with his recollection, he had calmed.
"Demyx, my lover or not you will always have a place with me," Axel murmured before kissing the blond on the forehead.
"Thanks, Ax. You should go to class. I'm alright," Demyx said softly.
"You sure?"
"Yeah. I'm just gonna go rest," he said softly.
"Ok," Axel put one more kiss on Demyx's forehead before helping Demyx to shift off his lap. He waited until the blond was settled before he slipped out the door.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Zexion sat outside the dorm, a cigarette between his lips, watching the smoke swirl up into the sky. He sighed and rested his head on the building behind him.
Is Demyx worth it? He pondered.
"Yes." Was his immediate answer. As he thought about it, the feeling solidified. Demyx was most definitely worth the trouble Zexion was going through. But the question scrolling through his head, now, was 'Am I good enough?' Zexion had always had self-security issues, but it was really getting to him this time around. He wanted to be good enough for Demyx. But, seeing as he had just made the blonde freaking cry...
Working on cigarette number four, Zexion's face grew cold. He brought a hand up to warm it and pulled it away too see that it was wet. He was crying. He hadn't even realized that he'd started crying. He laughed at himself for being so pitiful.
With one last inhale, he flicked the butt of his cigarette away and went to pull another from his pack, only to find that it was empty. He didn't have another carton with him... All the rest were up in his room (if he even had any left). Where Demyx was. After that, Zexion didn't feel like he could face his boyfriend. He was jealous. He was outright jealous of how much Axel knew and how much he was able to comfort Demyx. Another rush of tears fell down Zexion's cheeks and he felt so much more pitiful than before. He was crying not only because he was jealous, but because he was afraid that he'd just pushed Demyx away even more.
"God damnit, you're an idiot Zexion." He slipped his phone from his pocket and opened a text message. He typed in Demyx's number and let the cursor blink in the empty space for the text.
I'm sorry, Dem - He deleted the words.
I - He couldn't write anything more.
I love you. No. Stupid.
Zexion sighed and closed the message screen. He dialed Demyx's number instead. The phone went straight to voice mail. He must be asleep...
"Dem... I'm sorry. Whatever I did, whatever I didn't do... Just... I know... Well, I don't know... Just..." Zexion wrinkled his nose and sighed. "Just take your time. I want you to tell me... Whatever it is that you're hiding - don't think I haven't figured out that you've got some skeletons in your closet - I want to know it. ... I... I didn't mean what I said earlier. I don't want you to be with Axel; I want you to be with me... I'm selfish and, hell, I'll freaking admit it - I'm jealous. I'm so fucking jealous of Axel. That's why I said what I said. F-I... Dem... I'm sorry. Love you... I'll be back after lunch... Call me if you want to talk, please?" Zexion sighed and almost hung up. "...I really am sorry..." His phone snapped shut and he stood.
Zexion ambled to the bus stop just outside the school gates and sat down to wait for the next bus into town. Screw first block, his need for nicotine was far too great for him to even care.
-o-o-o-o-o-
Fuming, Axel left Demyx in his room knowing that the blond was exhausted enough to be able to fall asleep. He stormed back to his own room and in the door where he had forgotten he had a roommate at all.
He moved angrily to the closet and forcefully tugged off his old clothing and jerked on new ones. All the while he was muttering to himself.
Roxas's head snapped up as Axel stormed in. He seemed positively pissed at something. Plus, Roxas was absolutely pissed. Two pissed off guys in the same room was not a good thing...
"What's wrong?" Roxas asked, controlling his voice to hold no emotion.
"That son of a bitch caused Dem to have an episode. I shouldn't even be leaving him, but he wanted me to go to class and he will keep pestering me until I do," Axel said as he threw his dirty shirt angrily onto the floor of the closet and pulled out a new one."Then he didn't even stay to see if Dem was alright. That fucker said a ton of really stupid shit and then just left him!"
Roxas creased his eyebrows. "From what I've gathered, Demyx obviously hasn't told Zexion - that's his name right? - anything. I mean, how would you feel, being left in the dark for so long, and having your boyfriend constantly being with somebody else for com...fort...? ... I... Uh, sorry... I really have no room to talk..." He mumbled, sheepishly, his own rage forgotten.
"I would be pissed sure, but I would most definitely be talking to Dem about it, not scaring the living shit out of him," Axel sighed and moved to his bed where he plopped down.
"Look I know you think the same shit as everyone else does about the way Dem and I are. They are all positive that I am the one fucking him and not Zexion, but Dem and I are just friends. I mean yeah sure we used to screw and all that good stuff but we were dating then. Dem is just comfortable with me and touching is how he finds comfort. That's all," he said as an attempt to explain himself before he glanced at Roxas. For the moment he was going to ignore the no room to talk comment.
'I can't believe I'm gonna drag this out,' Roxas groaned, inwardly. "I... If Demyx is anything like I am... He'll avoid any and every chance to talk about it... So, he probably tried to avoid it any time Zexion tried to talk to him... But... Yeah, I know what you mean about just being friends. My brother gets 'fag' remarks all the time 'cause him and his friend are, like, really close. And I mean cloooose," he sighed, hoping for a topic change. He really didn't like involving himself in other people's business.
"Really?" Axel asked perking up with a bit of relief. He really didn't want his roommate to hop on the train of 'give it up already, you're fucking him' with everyone else in his life.
"I look at it this way," Axel stated as he grabbed his bag with his former smirk back in place. "If Dem wants me to join him and Zexion for a little fun then I'm game. Other than that, its hands off the Dem ass.
"Come on we should get moving to class," he suggested rising and deliberately ignoring the beginning of Roxas's comment. If Roxas was indeed like Demyx, then Axel was sure he could work it out of the blond when the time was right.
Roxas smiled in relief. "Yeah, we probably should," he sighed. He glanced over his schedule, which had somehow appeared in his hands, and frowned. "Care to help me figure this thing out?" He asked, holding the piece of paper out to Axel with a confused look on his face.
"Yeah sure," Axel said as he reached over and grabbed the paper. "These letters here," he pointed to a column of uppercase letters, "are your classes. The numbers beside them are the room numbers. Your classes are listed in order by block and day. So for today let's see... You start in Math with me. Then go to Science, good luck there. Then, History. And finally for today is PE again with me. Lunch is school wide between second and third block. Each block has 90 minutes and we rotate what ones we have on what days. Unfortunately, everyone has math and PE every day so we'll always start out with math. I'll make sure someone gets you where you need to go don't worry." Axel said the whole speech with a big smirk.
"It gets easier. Come on, all your teachers will have books for you so you might want to bring a bag to put them in, and maybe a note book and something to write with if you have it," he slung his own bag over his shoulder and stepped out into the hall to wait for the blond.
Roxas blinked and opened his mouth, but nothing came out, so he closed it again. He shook his head and nodded, taking the paper back and tucking it into his pocket. He grabbed his own bag from the floor next to his bed and joined Axel out in the hall.
"I don't like math..." He finally grumbled. "Ninety freakin' minutes, seriously?" Roxas half-whined.
Axel let out a chuckle. "I don't know anyone who does like math. I don't mind it cause I'm not too bad at numbers, but I would rather not do it if it could be avoid and, yeah, 90 minutes. It's really nice for PE though, gives us plenty of time to have fun."
Axel closed the door and led them down the hall and down a short flight of stairs. "The two floors above us is a senior floor, below us is a sophomore floor. The freshmen are all kept in their own separate dorm. There is another dorm for the girls across the campus and a girl's freshmen dorm as well," he explained, as they walked out of the dorm.
"The campus is set up as a circle as I'm sure you have seen. There is an English building. Then, a math and science one. The gym takes up its own building since we have an indoor pool as well as the full basketball court and workout room. The last building is the biggest. Half of it is where the social studies and whatnot are and the other half is the cafeteria. In the center of it all is what we call The Park. Pretty much it is a lawn with a few trees for shade. I figure you may have heard some of this already but no harm in hearing it again. The math building is this one," Axel said gesturing to the closest building to them.
He walked in the door and to their class room only pausing outside to tap the number plate right outside the room. "These are the numbers that correspond with your classes. The letter at the beginning is the building. This is building A and the rest is the room number. This is ours." He led the way into the classroom that was still fairly empty except for a student in the front desk.
"We got here a little early 'cause I'm gonna have to shake up the group. We all have first together and I wanted to be here before they all arrived. We sit in the back." He walked into the room where the individual desks were arranged into a four by five square. The red head completely ignored the person in the front and sat in one of the center desks.
"You can sit by me. Don't worry I'll take care of all the introductions and you probably won't have to do anything more then sit there and look pretty," Axel said with a wink.
Roxas's head swam at the intake of all the information. Sure, he'd heard it all before, but it was still a lot to take in. As they entered the class, Roxas just nodded, wondering who 'we' referred to.
To Be Continued…
A/N:
Kat – Well here is the next chapter. Hmm not too much is going on in here… So I might just have to hurry the next chapter a bit. Wow is it kinda strange to be writing current stuff that is probably like eight or so chapters down the road and editing this at the same time! *laughs*
Mikey ~ Yay, fillers! And orange sherbet! It's yummy~ Anywho, hope you guys enjoy this chapter, we'll try to update sooner~ ^^ Why am I always so happy, I wonder…? Roxas
