Disclaimer: I own nothing.

––

The open road wasn't as peaceful as it should have been. It was filled with walkers and discarded cars, which were nice for spare gas, but they did get in the way now and then. It was damn good they had a path already prepared for them, and that Noah had found a useful map in the grove. It was a two day trip from here to his home, and Carol was planning on making it two and half on the way there, just he could rest up and heal a bit longer before he saw his family. He wasn't a total mess, but no mother should see her son with a broken arm, a sprain wrist and missing teeth. Not all at once anyway.

Noah was out cold due to the medicine, and Carol enjoyed the quiet. It allowed her to think and plan. She knew the layout to Noah's home as he'd drawn it out for her as best he could, and she knew it was easy to hit. Too many trees too close by. Anyone could hide out in there and slip in at night to kill them. There were no towers, no real shifts, and Carol knew they weren't looking at a simple drop off, but she wanted him to have hope. She wanted to have hope too, not just cold logic. She would wait and see what this home had in store for them. Until then...she was going to borrow some of his hope and keep on driving.

Hours melted by as she drove further and further away from the grove, and her mind began to slip into memories to keep the boredom away. Her eyes alert and aware of both the road and the walker movement in the dark.

– – –

"Who's there?" she demanded, one hand on her stomach as she lifted her gun to the bushes that had shifted. "Come out."

"Hey, hey, hey." It was a blonde woman, and from the look of her she had a comfortable spot somewhere. She had clean clothes and more meat on her bones than most. She had a soft face, but faces could lie, especially ones that were soft. She wasn't going to lower her guard for her or anybody else that was associated with her.

"I—I'm not...whoa." Her eyes fell to the bump the woman held, her gun cocked, and she made eye contact. "Trouble. I—I'm Denise. I was just...looking for some water. I thought...I heard the river a while back, but...I think I am or was hallucinating."

"What makes you think I have water? Or would share?"

"I have food. It'll be good for the baby." She also was lying. She'd seen the woman wondering the land and collecting peaches a while ago. She wanted to help her. She'd searched for her, and she found her, but maybe there was a better approach than this. It was too late to change it, so she would have to work the charm. God, she hoped she even had charm at this point.

She narrowed her eyes. "Okay." She didn't lower her gun, but she did pull a water bottle from her bag. "The food first."

"Here." She pulled a container out of her bag. "These are oat cakes with honey and apple. They're health and full of protein. It'll be good for the baby."

"You try one first. Eat it, and I'll give you the water."

"I—I would never try to hurt—"

"Eat one," she demanded. "Go on."

She huffed but opened the container and bit into the cake. "See? It's...hot from the heat and sticky, but it's good. It's...uh, safe." She chewed with much effort. "Very sticky." Her teeth were almost glued together by the honey and the heat working against her chewing efforts.

Carol almost laughed at that and handed her the water. "It's cold."

"Thanks." She handed the container over and accepted the water, drinking it. "Oh, that's good."

She nodded and placed the container into her bag, walking off.

"Hey, wait. Where are you going?"

"Nowhere you can follow."

We'll see about that. She was more determined than ever to get that woman back to her camp. It was safe, and it'd be better for her and the baby. And honestly, for Denise, too. She wouldn't have to be alone anymore, and she could help her through labor. She'd get her to come around. Somehow.

––

Denise heard groaning and a hissing voice. She followed it, seeing the pregnant woman on the ground with blood on her hip, and there was another prick there with a gun. He had taken her by surprise. He was going to kill her. Pregnant or not, he was going to take her life—their lives—and continue on with his like nothing had happened. Like it wasn't the most disgusting and vile and evil action a person could commit.

Her gun fired before her mind realized what she'd done, Carol looked over and found the smoking gun in the hand of the woman she'd met in the woods days ago. She gripped her hip and tried to speak, but she couldn't think of what words to use as blood ran down her leg and stuck to her fingers.

"Hold on." She hurried to her side. "I'm a doctor. Well, sort of. It's complicated, but I can help you."

"Can you help my baby?" Carol wheezed. "Just save my baby, please."

"I'll save you both. Here, give me your arm. Lean on me. I have a place we can go."

It was a challenge to get to the car the woman had hidden in the woods, especially when her words slurred, but she managed. The woman was in and out of consciousness, her blood loss only increasing, and Denise booked it back to the grove. She parked the car and unlocked the front door, going back for the woman who was out cold at this point. She took her to the first bedroom and removed her shoes and pants, using towels to slow the bleeding while she fetched her medical kit. It wasn't much, but it was enough to save her. She just hoped the wound wasn't too deep. And it thankfully was through and through. It just bleed a lot from the movement. Thank God.

Denise patched her up as best she could, but the woman had lost a lot of blood from the hauling and heaving to the car and into the house. Denise had no idea what this shock could do to damage the baby. She didn't feel anything moving when she touched the firm bump, and she wanted to cry. She sat by her bedside and willed that baby to move, willed this woman to sit up and give her her name. She willed and willed for days, but there was nothing from either person before her, and her own will was wearing thin. She had no hope, only will, and that was almost gone, so what more could she do here? What more, goddamn it?! Please, survive.

By the eight day the woman woke, Denise had brought soup to try and force it down her throat again for the baby's health, and she was sitting up, coughing at a dry throat and holding her stomach. Denise saw a hand press against her belly and nearly dropped the soup. She didn't know if that was the baby or...the dead baby.

"Easy, don't move." She set the soup down on the nightstand and stilled her movement. "You're still injured, and that wound has put a lot of stress on you and the baby."

"You..." She strained, head barely kept up, eyelids drooping. "My...baby..."

"Here, drink some of this." She lifted a bottle of water to her lips. "Slow.

She drankly deeply, nearly choking on the cool water, and Denise eased it back to avoid it. She let the woman consume the entire bottle and sat beside her with the soup, offering it to her, but she wasn't so sure of Denise.

"It's canned from the items in your pack. I...don't have any liquids." She lowered the bowl. "I won't hurt you or your child. I want to help. I have helped. You would have died out there. Both of you."

"Why help me? I'm a stranger, a liability. Once this kid is born, it's a walker magnet. Babies cry just to cry most days. And that's if I or the baby survive birth." She studied the woman carefully.

"I've been alone for months," Denise confessed. "I was with a group—a good group with walls and medicine and food—but...someone came and seized control. I...I barely made it out with my life. Some of the others weren't so lucky. Most people couldn't handle the world. They gave up or died or got lost along the way, and I had to learn to fend for myself or die. I was so scared, but I pushed through it. And I got lucky. I found this place. I heard you in the woods a couple nights ago. I followed you. I was curious, and now that I know you... I want to help. I can deliver your baby. I studied to be a doctor."

"Studied? Not are?"

"I had to switch majors for my own sake, but I know plenty. You need my help, and I... I don't want to be alone anymore, okay? I can't stand the silence."

"I'm not your savior."

"How about my friend then?"

She chuckled weakly. "You don't even know my name."

"What is your name then?"

"It's Carol."

"Well, I'm Denise Clyod. I know trust won't come easy. I can sense that, but you need to stay in bed and rest for the baby's sake. It's my doctor's opinion. How far along are you? Eight? Nine?"

"Nearly eight." She adjusted her back against the headboard. "A few weeks shy of eight."

"Then it's bit over two months of bed rest. This place doesn't see much activity, so rest easy. Eat. You need to put some weight on you. I have peaches and pecans for days, so don't worry about the supply." She stood up. "This isn't some creepy Misery type friendship, by the way. I really just want to help, and you're pregnant, so I have to try and do everything I can to help. It's the human thing to do, and I won't let that be erased."

"I wasn't thinking that—only what I'd owe you."

"Can you garden?" Denise mused. "I've tried, and everything keeps dying."

She chuckled. "Yeah, I can garden."

"Good. Owe me a garden." She laughed. "And we're square."

"Okay then, Denise." She searched her eyes. "But I have one more question for you."

"Shoot."

"Are you doing this because you trust me, or because I'm pregnant?" Her eyes narrowed at the young woman's gulp. "So, it's not for just me."

"I wanted to help you, because it's the decent thing to do," Denise corrected. "Yes, the pregnancy was incentive to hunt you down and help you, but mostly I did it because you're lost, just like me. We can help each other, support each other, and that's as necessary in this world as food and shelter."

She relaxed her view on the woman. "You're right. Thank you."

"No problem." She set her hand on the door frame on her way out. "Get some rest."

She didn't trust this woman, but she didn't feel anything off about her. She had a good sense of people, and this woman was authentic. She wasn't trying to use her or hurt or her manipulate her in any way. She was like Hershel. She just wanted to help. It was good to know there were people like this in the world. The world her child would be born into. It would be better to stay and see this through than to just roam the country side and hope she found a place to give birth. Hoped to find Daryl and the others. And at least if she died, someone would be there to take care of the baby.

– – –

It took weeks for Carol and Denise to fully trust the other, but they both came around through checks up on the baby. Denise didn't know a whole lot about pregnancies, but she had plenty time to read while she was in her old camp. She knew this baby would be strong, a natural born survivor, and according to how the hard it kicked and how Carol's appetite grew, it would be a chunky little rebel. Carol laughed at her saying so, and she had a feeling the father might have been the same. She hoped to learn about him one day.

Some days were better than others. Denise thought some outside time would be great for Carol, provided she didn't strain herself too much, and Denise showed her around slowly. She'd probably gotten the full view from her first month there. Denise didn't want to risk the baby, and Carol didn't want to leave her room that much. They compromised, and they had some nice talks outside on the porch and in the garden. Denise was able to salvage her current crops for the winter, and Carol helped her pickle most of it. They were a great team, and the baby seemed to really like Denise. Whenever she would speak, the baby shifted like it was trying to hear her better. It was sweet. It even kicked when Denise said good night, like it knew she was leaving for a few hours. It was adorable. Carol might tell her about it one day.

When it began to get colder, Carol taught Denise how to track down animals. She couldn't fully roam the yard but she pointed out where chipmucks had been and made Denise figure out where they had gone, how to tell which prints were going where, and she picked up on it. Slowly, over the course of several lessons, but she did learn. Carol thought of Daryl during each lesson, even mentioned him when Denise asked how she learned all this, but she didn't mention more. It was too painful. To look for him for almost three months and finding nothing was near unbearable. He was alive. She knew he had to be, but he was truly gone from her. At least part of him would survive in her heart, and she would use what her taught her to aid this baby. Little Charlotte or DJ. She had the name Charlotte on the back burner for years, right after Sophia, because it was her mother's name, but she never had another baby. And she never had names for a boy, mostly due to Ed claiming the right to his son's name, so the best way to honor the amazing man she knew was give their son his name. Either one would be perfect.

Carol felt good enough to unload her bags after almost two months, Denise helped, and they came across Glenn's camera. She gasped and demanded they take a picture together, and Carol loudly groaned, but she humored her. She took a picture of Carol in all her nine-months pregnant glory, wearing one of Daryl's or Rick's shirts and the sweat pants of whatever man or woman lived her before. She couldn't help but smile at her eagerness, and she scooted closer to take a picture together. They came out really great, actually, and Denise asked to keep the camera. Her heart broke at the request, and Denise must have seen it, because she laughed and said she was joking. Carol shook her head and let her keep it. Her family...no matter how much loved them and missed and prayed to find them...were gone. Denise and this baby were her family now, and they would make memories and record them. Like a family did. It'd be great. It'd be a future worth fighting for.

––

Denise shot upright in bed at the sound of grunting and groaning, and she threw the covers off her legs, dashing down the hall to find Carol on the floor with heavy fluid around her. She gasped and dropped down beside her, Carol grabbed her hand and groaned as another contraction wrecked through her body, and Denise was close to having a full on panic attack. But Carol needed her to fucking not!

"Here, let's get you onto the bed." Denise helped her stand up.

"No, I need to stand." She gasped and leaned against the wall. "I—I need to stand."

"Umm, okay. You're the...expert here. Uh, here, grip the frame. I'll be right back."

She dug her nails into the wood of the frame and screamed as the contractions grew stronger and closer together. Carol had been in labor for far longer than Denise was aware of, the bedding stained with blood and fluid and likely sweat. Carol had lost all color in her face and was gripping the frame mostly for support. She watched Denise buzz around the room to prepare what she thought she might need, and on her fifty trip out Carol caught her wrist and held her in place.

"It's coming," she rasped. "Don't leave."

"Oh, God." The color drained from her face at those words, her eyes widening to almost impossible limits, but she nodded and steeled her resolve. She was ready for whatever happened or came out of her. She hoped.

Carol stood with one hand on the wall, the other gripping the frame, her nightclothes and underwear stacked underneath her to catch the fluids, and Denise wasn't entire sure where fit into this but she was ready to...jump in. Or pass out, whichever happened first.

Carol released a groan that escalated into a full on scream, Denise wanted to ask if she was okay, but she couldn't get words out at the fluid that dripped from her body as her scream increased. She stared with wide eyes at the sight before her, and realized those screams were fuel for pushing this child out of her. The more she screamed, the more power behind her pushes and soon the baby's head emerged.

"Oh." Denise blinked at the grumpy little face sticking out of Carol. The face little face was purple and almost...like yellow, too, but that wasn't color. That would wash off. It was...yeah, it wasn't a beautiful process, but damn. Go Carol.

"Aaaah!" She gasped in sharply and dug her nails deeper into the frame, the baby fussed between Carol's thighs, and Denise was partly awestruck and partly disgusted. "Come on, baby. Come on!" She screamed again and pushed even harder, gravity and her body working in tandem to rid her body of the child.

Denise watched as more milky fluids dripped out around the baby's head, watched as it shoulders came out of Carol's body, and then in one quick, moist motion the baby fell free. Carol's hands were around its little shoulders as yellow and white fluids splashed onto the pile of clothes. Carol crouched down over them, baby in her arms, the cord around it leg, and Denise stumbled carefully around it to see the baby.

It was this grumpy little purple thing in her arms that could have double as an uncooked chicken, but there it was. There she was. Small and silent and purple, breathing and gasping without sound. There she was. Ten fingers, ten toes, still looking like a messy uncooked chicken, but wow. She was amazing and real and right there.

Carol sniffed and smiled down at the little girl. "I've been waiting to meet you, sweet girl."

"Oh, my God." Denise felt tears in her eyes. "Oh, my God."

"This is Denise. She saved us. She saved you." Carol laughed softly at the wriggling bundle in her arms, and sound came gently then. Fussing only at the new awakening. "Oh, I know. Your dad isn't a morning person either, though he pretends."

"I—I'll start a bath for her. Um, the sink's okay?"

"Yeah." Carol nodded.

"Oh, here." She handed her scissors for the umbilical cord. "Could I?"

"Go ahead, and take her with you. I'm not quite done yet."

"Are you sure? I've never bathed a newborn. Or anything other than myself."

"I trust you." She smiled at her. "Support the head. It's easy."

"Okay." She snipped the cord where Carol instructed and rose to bath the child. "I'll be right back once I'm done."

Carol watched her leave with her daughter and inhaled to prepare to finish this out, but once it was over, she would hold her little girl and protect her from all harm. She would love her enough for mother and father, and should they meet again somewhere in the future, she would let Charlotte know to love him. To love him unconditionally and always, because he deserved to be loved like that, because that was how he loved. And he would love her the moment his eyes landed on her. If that happened, if they met, he would simply adore her. She just knew it.

––

It'd been three days since little Charlotte entered their lives, and Denise was worried about Carol. She'd been right there after birth, breastfed her and everything, but the last two days Carol didn't want to see her that much, save for meals. She was terrified it was post-partum depression, because she didn't know how they'd handle it, but she'd wait a couple more days. If she didn't improve by then, Denise would talk to her and try and find a nearby solution. It was early fall by the leaves' color, and there was no chance of easily growing a natural herd to help lighten her mood, so she'd have to go outside. She didn't want to do that, especially if Carol was out of it. She'd just have to wait and hope this turned around.

Later that night when Denise passed out after changing and feeding the baby, Carol adjusted herself on her bed with a pillow over her thighs with her baby resting there. She ran her eyes over Charlotte's little face and caught her fingers with her index finger and smiled lovingly at her sweet girl. Love flooded her heart, and she couldn't keep the tears back.

She was gorgeous, absolutely gorgeous, with the same eyes as her mother, looking back at her with equal love and a toothless smile. She was the same natural skin tone as her father, having his beauty mark beside her mother's mouth and a light dusting of his chestnut hairs on her head. Her nose wasn't like either parents just yet, and Carol suspected she would get freckles just like Carol did when in the sun. She couldn't wait to find out who this little angel grew up to be.

"Hey, you." Carol stroked her fingertips over her belly, Charlotte continued to grin at her, and Carol rubbed her thigh. "You're so happy. You're such a happy girl."

She was dressed today in a worn but soft purple sheep-covered onesie Carol had found before getting shot and dragged here. It fit her well, but Carol might have to cut up some of her pregnancy clothes as she grew. The thing was she mostly wore Daryl's clothes. It didn't make her sad to cut it, because it would be clothing this little one, and it'd be like Daryl was wrapping her up in his arms. It had no scent of him, but it was the closest outside influence of Daryl Carol could get. She knew he'd be so involved with this child. He'd love her so much, spoil her and raise her to survive. To survive and not lose herself to the darkness of his world.

And Charli would adore him. Gosh, he'd spent a lot of time with her during her pregnancy, a voice Charlotte had to know by heart, and it'd feel like he was protecting her. Like how he used to protect Carol. Like how he wanted to protect Sophia. It warmed her heart to think about him that way. He wouldn't just be a memory. He'd be a part of this life with Denise and Charli, no matter where it lead them.

On the downside, she would also have to make some cloth diapers out of his clothes, which would a pain to clean. But Carol couldn't go out runs while still healing, and Denise wasn't there yet. So, cloth diapers it was. That would make Daryl pout, to know Carol thought of him as a protector for Charli and also a shit collector. She almost laughed outright at the thought. Maybe some of Rick's shirts could be used too. It'd be fitting.

"You aren't tired at all, are you?" She caught her little legs and jiggled them, making her smile even more. "Just like your dad. He's such a night owl. And if he were here, you'd never sleep. He'd be with you every second, and I'd let him, because he... he would do so great with you. He'd love you as much as I do, and he would show that to you every single day. You would never question that, and you would learn so many lessons from him. He would spoil you as best he could."

Charlotte fussed at the sorrow in her mother's eyes.

"I miss him so much, but I have you to remember him by." She smoothed down her hairs and kissed her forehead. "And Denise. We're a family all our own, and you'll learn about your daddy. I don't know if you'll ever meet him in this life, but you'll know everything I know about him. I promise he won't be a mystery to you."

She scooped her up in her arms and kissed her head. "I love you more than anything in this life, Charlotte. I will keep you safe, and come whatever future we have, you will be able to protect herself and see this world into whatever fate it has. I promise. With everything I am, I promise."

– – –

With thoughts of Charlotte came thoughts of her father, and Carol exhaled to try and keep from remembering, but memories of him weren't pick and choose. They came when they came, and she either smiled or cried. Today, she hoped to smile from them.

––

"Hey, you're gonna miss breakfast," a husky voice whispered in her ear.

A smile crossed her lips, and she opened her eyes to find him above her, golden light shining into the tower as the sun rose to greet them, the chill of winter sneaking in despite the heater in the corner. She stretched her body out, the blanket falling away from her as she lifted her arms above her head and moaned softly.

"Well, we did miss dinner last night," she replied to him, completely aware of her upper body was visible and his eyes drinking her in. "But your chili was pretty good. Though we burned through it pretty quick."

He laughed under his breath at what exactly happened once the bowls were empty. Good thing it was a quiet night. "Yeah... the whole night was pretty good."

"Just "pretty good"?"

"Fishin' for compliments?"

"Not at all. You did that enough last night." She smirked at him, and he kissed her. "Kinda bruised my thigh, by the way."

"Sorry." He brushed his nose across hers and kissed the tip.

"I'm not. It was worth it." She touched her fingertips to his lips and chuckled airily, biting her own bottom lip and studying his beautiful face in the fervent light.

"It was, and you're right. It wasn't just good; it was amazing. The whole night. Hell, any night...with you." He cupped her cheek. "I love you, Carol."

Her heart fluttered as if she could feel his love spread throughout her body, and she sat up instantly, her face only inches from his. "I love you, too." She kissed his nose, he grinned and kissed hers back, and she stroked his cheek. "I will make you breakfast later."

He chuckled once more. "I like your cookin' more anyway." He leaned down and kissed her, sliding his tongue into her mouth and pushing her back against the blankets. He felt her leg wrap around his back, and he reached down to moved it back gently against the blankets.

She broke their kiss to eye him. "What are you doing?"

"Shh." He held a finger to his lips. "Glenn and Maggie will be by in a few minutes."

"Then why did you kiss—?" She cut off when he kissed her one more then ripped the blankets away from her, his head dipping down to kiss her curves. She weaved her fingers through his hair and closed her eyes as butterflies fluttered in her stomach, and he parted her legs.

"I know they'll be coming, but I won't take rushed work," she teased, whining at his tongue stroking against her softly, teasing her more than anything. She would have promised to keep quiet, but his tongue knew its way around, and he wasn't rushing anything.

––

"Hey, Carol, wait." Daryl rushed over her, pardoning the people around them and joining her. "Heard you were gettin' sick earlier. You okay?" He studied her face to be sure it wasn't anything bad. The woman never got sick and all of sudden she was heard puking her guts up. It might be an hyperbole by one of the kids, but still he wanted to be sure.

"Yeah, just...dizzy from the heat. I've been inside with the kids for so long, I think my body forgot how bad the direct Georgia sun could be." She waved it away and hugged herself. "I'm going to meet the girls in a few minutes. We're going to make more distractions for the walkers when we open the gates. It'll be a fun project."

"We already have so many."

"And I want to be prepared." She inhaled and walked over to the fence. "They keep piling up. I don't want any delays on ins or outs."

"That's true." He stood beside her. "I have to meet Tyreese to greet a few couple people Glenn found without me a couple days ago. I was out with Mags." She nodded in remembering, and he stepped close to ask, "You met 'em yet?"

"Yeah, there's Sara, Kahlee, Darren and Chuck, I think. They're nice. They've been here a few weeks. You've been busy with Michonne, so it's no surprise you haven't met them." She leaned back on the heels of her shoes. "Chuck is soft, and Darren is quite the flirt, but those women are capable. They already have shifts in the tower."

"Yeah, Mags mentioned that. And about the girls, too, but mostly Darren." He narrowed his eyes at her. "He uh, make a move on you? Or somethin'?"

"Hmm, or something? I mean, maybe, but why ask?" She peeked at him and laughed at his expression. "Are you jealous?"

"What? No, never, and that ain't an answer. If he bugs you, let me know. You shouldn't...have to be uncomfortable is all. This is your home first, and I ain't gonna let anybody try and make it...difficult to live here."

"Mmm, right." She stepped forward. "It's fine. I'm feeling a little warm now, so I'm going to go lie down before I meet the girls. This might be a little bug from staying out in the guard time too late at night. I'm trying to work on my aim, and I found a great teacher."

"Yeah?" He tried not to be bothered that she hadn't come to him for help. They'd gone out to learn and train and hunt after Andrea and Merle died, but she went to someone else for more. He wondered if he wasn't good enough, but he knew she didn't think that. She might simply learn better from the others. Like T-dog. He taught her while they were on the road, so maybe it was just a new perspective she sought.

"Yeah. I...really am better at focusing with Sasha's help. Maggie and Glenn pitch in, too, but Sasha has a sniper's eye. It helps."

"Sure you ain't just avoidin' me?" He crossed his arms, annoyed with himself for letting that slip out. He'd been trying not to say anything, and he just went and blurted it out. Good fucking job. " I mean... It's just that ever since—"

"Hey, I'm not avoiding you, and I'm not interested in Darren. He can take a hint, and I have better things to do. I have the tower tonight, so I'm gonna try and rest now, but I'll talk to you in the morning. I think my dinner the other night affected my stomach. It's been on and off upset since."

"Want me to drop by and keep you company in the tower?"

"Tempting, but Mika is gonna be with me. She wants to see what it's like up there at night. I have to be sure Maggie and Glenn have cleaned it up since their tower shift. Wish me luck." She strolled towards the prison to go back to her room for a few hours before meeting the girls. She wanted the quiet, and if playing on this rumor got her quiet, she'd take it. Besides once her shift was over she'd be cuddled up in warm arms and the noise wouldn't matter.

– – –

Beth sat on the porch after they'd gone, Charlotte was beside her, playing with cloth blocks and making plenty of noise so Beth couldn't forget she was there. She hugged her knees to her chest and smiled at the sight of the little girl. She missed Judith dearly, and while she liked having Charlotte to look after, it was no replace for the little girl who won her heart years ago. She wondered what she looked like now. How big she was. She missed her so much, missed them all so much.

"I thought you could use some water." Denise handed her a glass and sat beside her on the steps. "You look pale. What's on your mind?"

"Never seeing my family again. My sister, my brother-in-law, a baby I used to look after. So many friends." She swallowed hard, a lump in her throat tightening at those words. "It's a truth I accepted once, but I thought we would find them. Like me and Daryl would be out there, and we'd stumble across Rick or Glenn or somebody, but now... It's been three years, and they're bound to be long gone by now."

She set a hand on her shoulder. "I know this is...well, impossible. I know what it's like, and it lessens with time. I know you don't want to hear that, and maybe you don't want that, because you think that means you love them or are thinking of them less, but it's the truth. Time doesn't heal wounds; it only allow you to grow and be able to live with them."

"I guess, but I had just became friends with Daryl three years ago. He's kinder than I knew, as brave as I thought, soft and thoughtful and firm, but he was broken. It's different than how I was broken, but we...made some sort of sense in that brokenness together. Now he's gone, and everything we built is gone. I made a friends with someone I love and consider family, and now..." She shuddered. "I told him he'd miss me when I was gone, and now I am gone from him, and him from me. Really foreshadowed that, huh?"

"Beth..."

"I can barely recall my last conversation with Maggie. Our home was burning, our dad dead, and we had to...separate to be sure everyone was on a bus to escape." She lifted her eyes and wiped the tears that fell. "I didn't get to say I love you or see you soon or be careful. She was just gone, run off to find her husband, I think. She trusted me to get on that bus, but I didn't. I had to be sure the kids were safe, and I ended up with Daryl. We ran away together, and we didn't look back. I couldn't, and he refused. He didn't do anythin' for a while, but I knew we were goin' through the same pain. He eventually broke down and let it out, and I think he made his peace with never seein' Carol or Rick again. I don't know how he did it. I know how he feels about them, he loves them more than anything. Rick is like his brother, and Carol... She might as well be his arm she means so much to him. He put it aside in a little box and made peace with it. I don't know how he did it, but he did it to survive. I need to do that now, but it's so hard. I mean... They're my whole world. Or...well, they were. I was never taught to box anythin' away. Daddy always told me to be honest and open, and..."

"I'm so sorry." It was all she could say. "Truly, I am."

"I wanted to be like him in my own way. He's not fearless but he can still carry on. He's smart and can track and can survive. I wanted to be like that, and he taught me how to track, even let me use his crossbow, but...I'm me. I can't be like him. I have to feel and go through it. I tried not to, but it's bullshit. It was childish. Feeling emotions is...the best part of being human, even when it hurts." She exhaled deeply and smiled a little. "I'm not gonna hide anymore."

"Good. No one should hide." She looked over at Charlotte to be sure she was still being nosy and good behind them. "Daryl sounds like a good guy. You must have been close."

"He was like an extra brother when we were on the road. Nicer than Shawn ever was." She giggled sadly and snuffly. "After a point anyway. After the prison... I'm sure we all had moments where we broke. We recovered though. I... I hope he stayed recovered after..."

"I'm sure he found his own way to survive. We all do." She stood up and gripped her shoulder before releasing it. "I'm going to check the area and get some water. If you need anything, just holler."

"I'll be fine, but thank you, Denise."

She lingered for a moment and met the girl's eyes. "You never know where life leads you, Beth. You may see Maggie again. And Daryl."

"I wanna see her more than anythin'." She laced her fingers together. "I want my sister back."

"I...know that pain, and it doesn't get easier, but who knows what tomorrow brings? We might die. Or we might find our families."

"Are you missing someone too?"

"Someone as important as my lungs, and I feel the weight of his absence with every breathe. When you're born with someone and then there suddenly gone...how else can you feel?" She tucked hair behind her ears and pulled out a smile. "But I guess I carry his soul with me, right? Twins and all."

"Right." Beth nodded and stood up, returning her smile. "Even when they're gone, they're here."

"Just not in the way we want them." She put her hands on her hips and stepped back towards the fence. "Get Charlotte inside, okay? Too much sun isn't good for her."

"Sure thing." Beth caught the small girl and held her, turning slightly towards the front door, but she stopped. She hesitated before she asked, "Did she ever talk about us?"

"She used to." Denise nodded her head and smiled fondly at the memories of Carol's face lighting up with laughter at memories—only to be swept away with that dreaded sorrow of knowing she might never see them again. "It helped Charlotte to sleep to hear stories of you guys, but...I think it was too much after a while. It set in that she wouldn't see you guys or...Charlotte's father again. She just stopped talking and started reading to her." At least when Denise was around. She couldn't say for her night time fits.

"Charlotte's father... Do you know who he is?"

"No. She never told me, but I have an idea. No name, but...an image. It doesn't help you in anyway, but if Carol wants you to know, she'll tell you."

"I know, but I was kinda hopin' to worm it outta you." She huffed softly and smoothed down baby fine hairs from Charlotte's head. "She looks just like her mama. It's impossible to tell."

"If you figure it out, let me know. I'm off. You two be safe, and try and keep her nose clean. She's a wanderer, and she's so damn nosy. In a very slick way."

"She's just a baby." Beth held her closer and tried not to laugh at Denise's accusation.

"Yeah, a sly baby. One minute she's beside you, the next she's down the hall, chewing on bullets you hid."

"Oh, wow. Was she okay?"

"Yeah, but Carol almost killed me."

"I'm not surprised. After Sophia, this girl should be in bubble wrap." She stroked her chubby cheek and caught the mild confusion in Denise's eyes. "You know about Sophia, right? Carol's first daughter?"

"Is she before Mika and Lizzie?"

"Um, yeah, she was Carol's blood daughter. Mika and Lizzie are adopted, I believe."

"Oh, right. She mentioned that. We...were drunk, I wanna say. I found a moonshine shed a while before I found Carol, and I thought I could use it for protection somewhere along the line. Anyway, after a long night I busted it out, and we just talked." It was months after Charli was born, and they just got hammered. It was great, though the hangover was a nightmare. They barely survived with a demanding baby and a couple walkers trying to cross the fence.

Beth blinked and jerked forward. "A—a shed? With moonshine?"

She nodded. "Carol is an interesting drunk."

"How long ago was it? Did you know Carol at the time? Was it still together?" She grabbed her arm and searched her eyes. "Did you see a fire?"

"It was way before I knew Carol, and yeah, actually. I did see a fire about two or three years ago. I had to deal with burnt walkers. It was...a waking nightmare. I'll never forget the smell. Or the sight." She gulped and pulled her arm free. "It was terrible."

Beth wrapped her limp arm around Charlotte and shook her head once. "We were so close..."

"To what?" She rubbed her wrist and looked the young woman over.

"To you, to her, to—this." She turned to face the house. "If we would have stayed put..."

"Noah never would have been saved," Denise finished, setting a supportive hand on her shoulder. "And Charlotte wouldn't have gotten medicine. If I had even ventured out as I had. With people here, she might have just died."

"But it's likely we found have found her. I mean, she wasn't too far, and there would be no way Daryl wouldn't have gotten her medicine..."

"And Noah?"

She squeezed her eyes shut. "I don't know, but if we could have gotten together, all of us with you and Carol...maybe we could have—" She stopped herself. "But that doesn't help us now."

"It doesn't."

"I better get her inside." She moved towards the house and smiled at Denise. "Thank you."

"For what?"

"For taking care of her, of them. For helpin' Noah. I can't thank you enough, but thank you. Really."

"You're welcome, and with all Carol's given me, it was the least I could do."

They parted ways then, Beth put Charlotte inside for some shade, and Denise walked the perimeter and all was quiet. All was still, save for the chestnut-haired girl who was looking for trouble. There was no room for what if and replays; what happened had happened. It would work itself out eventually. Hopefully.

Hopefully...

– – –

Carol pulled the car over, Noah pulled the gauze out of his mouth and tossed it out the window, and Carol excused herself to use the bathroom. She surveyed the area before heading into the woods, glancing back to see Noah getting out of the car for air. She chose a spot and kept an eye on him. He was still high on the meds, but his mouth had healed well, and he was looking better. Well, less swollen, anyway. He still had a lot of damage from the hospital, but he bounced back mentally. She was proud of that and envious. He still had hope. An abundance of it. What a lucky gift.

She heard a twig snap as she adjusted her belt, pulling her knife from its holster.

"Is that a chicken?" Noah numbly asked, pointing into the woods behind her. Only it was much more garbled, and she only understood it after listening to her own daughter trying to speak when she was ten months old.

She looked over and saw it was a chicken. Only it wasn't alone, and it wasn't alive anymore. It was being devoured by a walker. She grabbed his arm and guided him back to the car quickly as he waved to the chicken and greeted the walker. She sat him down and ran around to the driver's side, the walker was alone and distracted by its meal, so she left it be, pulling off and following the directions Noah had given her prior to his dentist visit.

It wasn't much longer from that point, Noah was beginning to groan beside her, and she tried to offer him more sedatives, but he didn't want them. He pushed them away and sat upright. She glanced at him to be sure he was okay, and he gave a thumbs up since his jaw was too sore for a smile.

"Are you sure you don't want anything? A low dose, even? I can break these in half."

"I'm good," he managed, trying not to move his mouth much at all. "I want to be...sober when I see them. No pills. No nothin'."

She nodded. "Okay, just try and keep quiet." He gave another thumbs up, and Carol chuckled at him. "Beth made you some soup for the trip. It's in the cup holder."

He reached down and picked up the small thermos, an aww coming from his throat as he didn't want to speak it.

"It's mostly soften carrots, potatoes and peas, but it has flavor. We were able to make a broth for it, and it tastes better than canned. It's just less than canned. Nothing you have to chew. You can mash it with your tongue and the roof of your mouth if its too big to swallow. We cubed it all small though."

He had to resist smiling, his eyes burning at the care behind this little thermos of soup, and he set his hand over hers on the steering wheel.

"You're welcome." She grasped his pinkie with her thumb and squeezed it affectionately. "Now drink carefully, please. Beth will want an empty thermos when I get back."

He nodded and twisted the cap off, using his thighs to steady the thermos.

Carol kept her eyes on the road and exhaled slowly. "If anything goes wrong there, you can come back with me." She didn't look at him. "Or come back to us at any time. We may not have a lot of space, but you're welcome with us, Noah. You saved my daughter, and you saved my family. There will always be a place for you with us. I want you to remember that."

He peered at her over the thermos and swallowed. "Hmm?"

"I'm just throwing that out there. You don't have to take me up on it, but it is out there. We're here for you. Charlotte... She is so fond of you. I've never see her take to a stranger so well before, but I trust her judgement. And Beth's, of course." She cleared her throat. "You're one of us, too. That's all I meant to say."

"I appreciate that, and the same extends to you." His mouth was mostly numb, a mild twinge in throbbed through his cheek, but he wanted her to hear that. He needed her to hear that. He was beyond grateful, beyond appreciative. She made it clear he owed her nothing for this generosity and yet he owed her the world for it. He wished he could give it to her, give her all the joy and happiness she was giving him now, but he couldn't. Maybe one day.

She nodded and smiled for him. "Eat. We'll be there by the morning."

––

The trip was peaceful the entire way, save for that almost incident with the walker and chicken. It was a pleasant drive with very little worry about. Noah was calm and mostly slept through the trip, and Carol's mind spent the majority of the trip trying to come up with some way to ease his pain should the reality of the world devoured his home in his absence. She had little hope of meeting his mother and brothers and reuniting them. She knew the world was rarely so kind, but perhaps he had some luck left. Perhaps.

Hers had been beaten out of her so quickly, but that was before this world had come to an end. She was stripped clean of it once again when her little girl disappeared in the woods and turned up days later in a barn full of walkers. Her body dirty, her shoulder bloody, her face...twisted with hunger and lifelessness. Her little body...empty of the beautiful soul Carol had nurtured and loved and protected. From that day onward, Carol was empty. She did what had to do to keep surviving, and eventually that hope came back to her in small slices. The closer she got to her family—helping Lori with her pregnancy, keeping close to Beth and ensuring the young girl was mentally balanced, keeping Daryl close to the family when he wanted to wander off—it rebuilt itself. Day by day as their world shifted and bloomed at the prison, she found peace and joy and hope. She found love in so many forms, and she felt cherished and respected. She felt alive again, and all was well.

But then it was taken away. Illness came in, she made...a decision that changed everything, and the world was cruel. She had said goodbye to Daryl and his team so they could go out and bring medicine back to their family. She didn't know that was a forever goodbye. Rick made that so. Phillip cemented it. And she was all alone in the world, not knowing how much of her family was even still alive, and she was pregnant. A gift yet a curse. With no home, no food, no supplies, it was a curse. She knew she could lose that baby, perhaps even her life afterward, and she accepted that. She was ready to accept that. It wasn't giving up. It was the reality of the situation.

Yet she survived. Her daughter was surviving inside her. She found supplies of food to last, eventually found a good source of water and then Denise. She found a home and had a healthy little girl. She was strong and supported, but the world was greedy. It liked to take and take, and she would keep her eyes peeled for its grabby hands so when it came back to take, there would be nothing left for it to reach. She didn't believe in hope anymore. She didn't pray anymore. Instead she planned. She prepared. She watched. She was ready for whatever the world threw at her next. Noah wasn't so fortunate. She would have to support him should reality rear its ugly head.

"Not too far now." She straightened in the driver seat and saw Noah lean forward to stare out the window. "Just down this way, right?"

"Yeah, but um, just park here and we can walk. They... Just the last time a car came through, there was a lot of trouble." He undid his seat belt. "It's a ten minute walk tops, and I could use a walk."

"Okay." She pulled off the road and parked the car, seeing streaks of light blue pierce through the blackness in the sky. She climbed out of the car, locking it and leaving their supplies behind. "You okay to walk?"

"Yeah." He smiled, not caring about any pain or pull it offered, hobbling out onto the road. "It smells like rain."

"Just the woods." She fell into step beside him. "Nervous?"

"A bit." He inhaled and swallowed. "But I'll be fine. Let's go."

The pair continued onward on foot, the light blue reached across the sky like fingers in a pond, their reach causing ripples throughout the blackness of night. A blue light shined down on them as they walked onward, a cool breezing catching at their clothes, and hope brimmed inside of each step Noah took. Hope and the overwhelmed affects of excitement. He couldn't bare the walk any further. He wanted to run and be home and be with his family once more. He couldn't run. Not with the meds in his system and his leg, but if he could... If he could.

The outline of his home came into view, the blue-tinted world showing its wall, and Carol's eyes fixed on a spray painted words along one wall. Her hand instantly went to her belt, Noah didn't seem interested in it those words, and Carol's eyes narrowed and looked over the area carefully now. The beauty of the morning gone as cold caution took over.

They arrived at the gate and entered his home. Even in the haze of the lazy morning sun rise, it was obvious nothing about this home of his was the same as when he left. It was silent and felt more frigid than any winter's cold. That cold caution lessened the blow for Carol, who had been expecting this outcome, but it was like a power outage for Noah. As Noah stared and stammered to himself, Carol pulled her knife from her holster, and she called after him when he ran off towards a house.

"Noah." She hurried after him, nearly tripping over a dead body in the street, and she looked at it in horror. It wasn't a simple walker kill, or just dispatching an enemy. No, this body had been brutalized. Gaps missing from all over, boot shaped indention on its head, limbs barely held on by flesh and muscle. She felt sick at the sight and stumbled away to find Noah, though he had vanished from her sight.

"Noah?" She was about to follow the path she'd last seen him take when she heard movement. Human movement by the rapidness of it, and she took cover by a nearby car.

It took about five minutes for her to see movement in the treeline, she crouched down further and narrowed her eyes to make out the outline of two men fleeing from some type of danger. She saw even more men behind them and curse. She threw herself away from the car and towards where she last saw Noah. They had to leave. They had to leave now.

Gunshots rang out, she smacked against the side of a house, and someone screamed. She peered over the side of the house as more gunshots sounded, but they weren't hitting anything. There were no more screams, no more groans or bodies hitting the forest floor. The men who were chasing them down likely had ducked for cover, so why would they waste bullets? And time? All they were doing was causing a commotion, just making a lot of noise. They were...just making noise. Why would anybody want to make such nose? All it would do...

"Shit." She pushed off the house and noticed impressions in the grass. "Noah." She followed them and found him on the floor, sobbing and apologizing to a body in front of him. As she drew closer, she saw it was a woman's body, and she had been killed long ago. She was decaying, no smell, no insects. There was nothing here anymore. "I'm so sorry."

"I should have been here," he murmured. "I'm so sorry. I should have come home. I should have... I should have come back sooner. I said... I had plans...It wasn't enough... I wasn't enough..."

"Noah, I am so sorry, but we have to go. You heard those gun shoots. We have to move."

He nodded through his tears and covered her with a blanket. "I'm sorry, Mom."

"Come here." She wrapped an arm around his around and supported his weight as they walked towards the door, a soft snarling emerged from the next room, and they looked over to see a small body standing there, reanimated and coming for them. She thought instantly of Sophia. And another small body.

Noah pulled the knife from his belt and approached his little brother, hand on his shoulder to keep him at bay. "Hey, Tyler... That's you, isn't it?"

"Noah," Carol urged.

He sniffled and nodded. "Yeah, it's you. I'm sorry." His voice broke as his little brother snarled and growled and reached for him. "I love you, Tyler." He thrust the knife through his head, catching his little body before he fell to the ground, carefully placing him there. "Goodbye."

They rushed out of the house only to be met by a flood of walkers, Carol pulled him behind the house and used the now bright rays of sun to guide them. The honey warmth of the morning sun reflected about forty walkers within those walls, a group of them devouring one of the men who were being chased, the W on his forehead ripped off as they ate and crunched and tore. The second man was weaving through the houses like Carol and Noah, feeling the gun with only a few bullets left heavy in his hand, and his pursuers hot on his tail.

Carol knew there was no leaving the way they entered, so she looked over the fence for a weak spot and noticed a shitty patch job further down. "Through here." She kicked the wood in as it was bolted into the stone and it gave easily.

"Stop right there," a low voice commanded, a gun cocking halting their moves. "Hands up."

Noah and Carol exchanged a look before standing with their hands up, Carol already had a plan to disarm him and get Noah through the hole before any more surprise guests showed up, but there was no need. The man who commanded they stop was a friend, was family, and Carol smiled at the sight of him. A disbelieving laugh escaped her, and she drew closer to embrace the young man when a gun fired and blood splattered across her shirt.

Carl stared blankly at the blood on Carol's shirt, more of it gushing out of the wound to the right of his face that had taken his eye, and his lips parted. "Carol...?" He collapsed, gun falling to the grass, and Carol caught him, falling with him and holding him close.

Without even blinking, her hand snatched the gun from the ground so hastily blades of grass ripped out with it and shot the man straight through the shoulder, leaving him very much alive for the walkers who were coming to feast on whatever had caused such noise. She handed the gun to Noah and tended to the precious boy in her arms, removing her blouse and tying it around his head to help stem the bleeding.

"Stay with me, Carl. Stay with me." She turned to Noah. "Help me."

"You go through." Noah took Carl from her. "Go now."

She slipped through the hole, grunting as the wood cut her thigh, and she fell free. She turned back for Carl, wrapping her arms around his chest to ease him through the hole, and Noah ensured the wood didn't cut Carl like it had Carol. He followed through the hole, helping Carol lift Carl up and haul him through the woods back to their car. He sorely wished he'd taken Carol up on those meds now.

The haul back to the car wasn't as smooth as they had wished due to walkers heavily searching the area and Noah's lack of upper body strength, but they managed. Carol tossed their bags to the floor of the backseat and dragged Carl inside the car, his torso on top of her thighs, and she dug through the medicine bag with blood covered hands to find medicine and gauze to help stabilize him until they got home.

Noah started the car and pulled out, gunning it down the road and letting any walker than came onto the road be hit. He was grateful for not taking any drugs, because this would have been hell on a high. It was hell sober. The worse nightmare imaginable. Well, almost. He wasn't entirely alone, and he got to have closure. It wasn't what he wanted, wasn't' what he deserved, but Beth was just like him. She deserved so much better, and at least he did have this closure. Even if it felt like he was being torn in half.

He looked back in the rear view mirror at Carol and Carl then sped up even more. It was a long trip home, and he would be damned if he put his own brother down just to watch Carol do the same with another family member. No. This happened for a reason, and he would ensure that reason was the survival of this guy. Mom would want them, his brothers and his father. The people of his community would want this, so he would deliver. He would get this Carl home to Denise then... then he would mourn.

Back at the Shirewilt Estates Glenn and Gabriel watched the walkers roam through the gated-in area, looking for any signs of Carl and not finding any. They had chased those last two wolves down for the medicine they'd stolen—all of their medicine from this last run—and they were so far from home. Now Carl was missing, and all they had to go by was his hat left behind in a pile of blood. Glenn had seen it through his binoculars, and they were able to get the hat, but...there was no sign of Carl. Glenn thought he saw another boy running through the streets just before the wolves unleashed those walkers, but he wasn't sure. All he could hope is if that boy wasn't with the wolves, he was with Carl and kept him safe.

They were trapped by the walkers, luckily able to get into a home with strong walls and reeked of death. No walker approached them, but they couldn't get out. They had to wait these walkers out and hope Carl was safe. It made Glenn want to raze this shithole just to find the boy, but he couldn't be so reckless. Gabriel was wounded by the wolves—an ax to the side—and he couldn't move quickly anywhere. He could barely move at all. Glenn wouldn't—and couldn't—abandoned him, but once they were out, they would try and find Carl. If Gabriel didn't extensive medical care. The bleeding had slowed, but...the damage and infection worsened every second.

He turned away from the window and balled his hands into fists. "Damn it."

"He'll be fine," Gabriel spoke through dry lips, voice hoarse from the lack of water and excess of sedatives in his system, "he has an angel with him."

Glenn wanted to laugh humorlessly at that statement but his heart hurt too much for even that. "Gab..."

"Angel..." He pointed out the window. "White haired angel..."