I haven't updated in a while… no one really seems to care much, but y'know, whatever. Here's the next chapter anyhow.
Part One: The Sex
Chapter Three: The Ex-Best Friend
Well, needless to say I was rendered unconscious by maybe a stunning spell, or maybe a blow to the head. Either way, when I awoke, Sev was bending over me, looking slightly concerned. When he saw my open eyes, he sighed and leaned back. "I'm sorry," he said. "It had to be done. You two are… well, you two are some of the best in the Order. We had to take you."
"I hate you," I deadpanned at the blank stone ceiling above me.
Sev sighed again. "I know. I'm sorry about that, too."
I couldn't resist a peek at him, to see if he really was sorry. I figured he was, because I mean, honestly, why would he tell me he was if he wasn't? His black eyes were on me, sad-looking, almost wistful. "If you're so sorry, let me and Sirius go." I said.
Sev shook his head. "I don't see how I can."
"Coward," I spat at him. "You're a filthy coward." He didn't deny it. "Where's Sirius?"
"Black?" No, the other Sirius. "He's over there. Still unconscious by the sound of it."
"What d'you mean, 'by the sound of it'?"
"Well," Sev shrugged. "He isn't shouting at me, is he?"
I thought about that, and realized it was true. How was I going to get out of there with no wand and no Sirius? "I'll make you a deal, Sev," I said desperately.
Sev raised an eyebrow at the old nickname. "And what might this deal involve?"
"If you give me and Sirius our wands back, and let us out of here, I'll have sex with you. Well," I revised, "I'll do it you before you let us go."
"And how do you know I want what you're offering?"
I rolled my eyes. "Please, Sev. What guy wouldn't?"
Sev appeared to deliberate this point. "How do you know I won't take your fuck and not let you go anyhow?"
"I trust you, I think," I said.
"What about Potter?" he asked darkly.
I sighed, feeling my throat tighten and my eyes well up. "We're not exactly together anymore."
Sev gave a sort of twisted smile before saying, "Fine. Deal. Just so long as no one finds out about this."
—THIS SECTION HAS BEEN REMOVED FOR EXPLICIT CONTENT AND OTHERWISE INAPPROPRIATE SUBJECT MATTER—
"That was interesting," Sev said, his face less sallow than I'd ever seen it.
"Yeah," I agreed, pulling my shirt back on. "Not the best fuck I've had today, but good enough."
"Pardon my asking," Sev said, handing back my wand, "but just how many fucks have you gotten today?"
"Well… one last night… one in the early hours of this morning… and, uh, just now. So, like, three, I suppose, in the past twenty-four hours."
"Busy girl," he said, amused.
"Yep," I replied dryly. "Sirius's wand, please," I held out my hand and took it.
"Do you still hate me?"
I hesitated. "I guess not. But I can't forgive you."
Sev nodded. "I understand. You'd better get going before they come in here. Oh, you might want to look as though you've knocked me out or something."
"Please, Sev, even if You-Know-Who comes in here, Sirius and I can take him. Me and a bunch of the other Order members—we've already escaped him twice. We can do it again." I paused. "I'm going to Stupefy you now."
He nodded. "See you 'round."
Stupefy! I thought, pointing my wand at him. I grabbed Sirius's unconscious form and blasted the opposing wall apart. I heard alarms go off, but once I dragged Sirius outside, I Disapparated, taking him with me.
I Apparated at Alice and Frank's apartment. Banging on the door, I shouted, "Allie! Let me in!"
The door was opened by Frank, who said, "What was your supposed reasoning in third year to make Alice my partner in Herbology?"
"I said I had a vision during Divination the period before and that I saw myself being partnered with Kartik Patil instead of Alice, thank you Frank, now, please… oh, jeez, wait… uh… what is Alice's mother's maiden name?"
Frank smiled. "Rider. Come in, Lily. Er… Sirius… is he okay?"
"Yeah, he's just unconscious." I threw Sirius down on the couch. "Where's Alice?"
"She's in bed, asleep, as most people are at this time of night. Morning. Whatever."
I grimaced. "I'm sorry for barging in here, Frank. I was at Sirius's place—we got taken by Death Eaters."
Frank's eyes widened. "How'd you get away? Where's James, wasn't he with you?"
"No. He—I—We… we split up. Last night."
Frank's dark brown eyes softened, and he pulled me into a hug. "I'm sorry, Lily. What'd you two row about now, anyhow?"
I sighed. "Well, we sort of… hang on, I need to tell Alice. Get her up, please."
He led me into their small bedroom, nothing but the bed and Alice's old purple desk lamp sitting on the floor in the corner of the room. "Allie?" he sat on the edge of the bed and gently shook Alice awake. "Alice, love, Lily's here."
Alice's eyes opened. "Lils!" she cried, flinging her arms around me. "It's so good to see you. What time is it?"
"Late," Frank said dryly, and I, of course, ignored him.
"James and I had sex, Alice." I said quickly. She gasped, and I heard Frank mutter something about 'Saint James.' "Uh-huh," I continued. "And then…" I proceeded to tell the story.
When I had finished, Alice and Frank gaped at me open-mouthed. They were silent. I waited for one of them to speak, unsure if I wanted to hear what either of them had to say. Frank spoke first: "You had sex three times in the space of twenty-four hours?"
I nodded, feeling my face heat up. Alice swallowed a giggle before saying, "James, Sirius, and Snape… Hmm… not exactly who I would serial-fuck, but okay, your life, not mine."
Frank looked as though he was going to say something, perhaps to ask Alice just who she would serial-fuck. Instead, he shook his head and put his hand on top of Alice's. I cleared my throat awkwardly. "I should wake Sirius."
I walked back into the living room and turned Sirius over on the couch. I lifted the Stunning spell on him and he blinked a couple times. "Lily? What? Where are we?"
"We're at Frank and Alice's," I said.
Sirius sat up, running a hand through his silky black hair. "What? But—Snape! And—how did you—?"
"I, uh, sort of…"
Sirius rolled his silvery eyes. "You have a bad case of getting-over-ex-boyfriend." He snorted. "Just go back to your old place and ask for him to take you back."
"Are you serious?" I paused. "Say nothing. I have no patience for your lame jokes tonight. What I mean is, you've got to be kidding me! Don't you think I have any dignity at all?"
"Lily, honestly, you just had sex three times in one day. I don't see how even you could mistake yourself for someone with dignity." Involuntary tears sprang to my eyes. Here was Sirius Black, the king of Sluts, telling me I had no dignity. The irony was enough to drive a woman into madness, but I figured I must already be pretty far past the point of no return where my sanity was concerned. "Oh, God, are you crying?" Sirius sounded appalled. "Lily, stop it."
I sniffled. "I—" I started crying in earnest then, and through my blurry eyes I could see Sirius looking nervous and disgusted at the same time. He was never very good at masking his emotions. He patted the top of my head awkwardly. "I'm not crawling back to him. I refuse to do it, Sirius. This is a matter of honor; I walked out on him, I'm not begging him to take me back."
Sirius contemplated this. Then he exhaled in defeat. "Do you want him back?"
"I don't know."
"How can you not know? Don't you miss him? Do you wish he missed you?"
"I don't know," I repeated. "I just—I thought I loved him. I think I still do. But we're so different, Sirius. If we couldn't stay together the first time, why should the second time be any different?"
Sirius's mouth turned upward at one side. "You said it yourself, Lils. Neither of you can stay mad at the other for long. You said that you two made a good pair, because no matter how much you fought, you always made up."
I sighed. I had said that, hadn't I… I wondered if James had found a new girl yet. It'd only been a day, but you never knew with him. Anna-lee Aaron lived nearby to James's apartment, and he very well might have taken my sarcastic advice and called her up. "I'm not going back to him after one lousy day. It'll take at least a fortnight to get me back to that apartment."
Sirius shrugged. "Suit yourself. But Lily—how are you going to face him at the Order meeting tomorrow?"
"Bloody fuck," I said.
"Yes," Sirius agreed.
Alice came staggering into the room at this point, her curly blonde hair hanging unkempt around her face. "Would you two like some… er… coffee, Lily? Tea, Sirius?"
"Coffee's good, thanks Alice," I said brightly.
"Whatever," Sirius said, collapsing on the couch again.
Alice pulled out coffee and tea, and before I knew it, a mug was being shoved under my nose. "Thanks, Allie," I said before taking a sip of the coffee. I spat it back into the cup. "Er, Alice, what kind of coffee is this?"
Alice frowned, handing me the package. "It's the same kind you always drink," she said.
Sure enough, as I looked at the package I saw that it was the same brand and flavor as always. "What's wrong with it, then?" Sirius sat up and was gaping at me. "What," I asked him, "is your issue?"
"Lily," he said disbelievingly, "how many times did you have sex in the past, erm, let's see, day?"
"What are you on about you—" I broke off. "Bloody hell. You don't think—"
"Lily," Frank began nervously, "are you…"
"Pregnant?" Alice finished.
Oh, shit. Just my luck, wasn't it?
Fourth chapter should be coming soon. Ish. Soon-ish.
Anyways, did you like it? Review, please, there's more to come! :D
