AN: This is where Hold Me Down started to become a two hander and looked more in to the pairs POV.
"Trust Gran and Matsumoto to think that having me going back to school would be a good idea! As if I need more degrees! As if I'm not enough of a freak already," Tōshirō grumbled as he walked back home. "You should have more friends your own age," he bitched imitating Matsumoto to perfection. "As if I want that; I'm happy where I am!" He looked up and saw that he was at the cross walk and that over the other side by the river there was a guy dribbling a football in and out of the bollards as if he was training. "Idiot," he mumbled under his breath as he stomped across the cool asphalt that had yet to be warmed by summer sunshine.
He got to the other side and the guy with the football still hadn't looked up and it was apparent to him that they were on a collision course and Tōshirō was not in the mood for that drama.
"Oi watch it!" he shouted in a way that he knew made him sound like a tool. The guy froze and pulled the baseball cap he was wearing further down on his head as if steeling himself for a confrontation, he turned and that was when Tōshirō realised that for all his genius he was wrong the guy with the football wasn't a guy at all and as the obsidian eyes bore in to his he found it hard to breathe.
"Ummm sorry," she said her voice soft, gentle and low nothing like the squawking he was used to from Matsumoto. She was beautiful in an understated way there was no makeup and no effort put in to what she was wearing, but she was comfortable in her own skin. For someone who never really fitted in anything it was the most attractive quality a person could have. He couldn't even remember what they spoke about because he was hypnotised by the thin perfectly formed lips that spoke to him and the sparkle within the black eyes.
As he glanced down giving her a furtive once over that was when he noticed it; on her sweatshirt was her schools emblem; which just happened to be the one he had enrolled in. She hopped out of the way and he walked past throwing out a passing remark that confused her making her face look so sexy that he had to ball his hands in to fists so he didn't touch her. He then thought it would be a good time to vanish so he ran over the crest of the hill so fast that his sides hurt and his throat felt as if a tonne of razor blades had been put in it. He barely knew the girl he couldn't want her that fast could he? Especially when he was nearly someone else's to begin with.
Things got harder from there on out, there were little things that he couldn't deny were happening to him. He began to care about his appearance; he cared about what Karin thought of him. He cared... period. Somehow Karin had found a chink in his armour and had pushed her way in; breaking through all his defences and for the first time in a long while he didn't mind, he actually encouraged it. He found himself flirting with her a little and at the start it was unconsciously, but soon he was doing it consciously and loving it, especially when her eyes lit up so the obsidian seemed to be shedding light instead of taking it in like a vacuum.
He couldn't believe his good luck when she actually asked where he was going after classes and that when he told her that she wanted to join him whole heartedly. What he couldn't believe more was the fact that he said yes so easily. No one else had ever asked, but he knew if they had he would have said no. Matsumoto knew about Momo and the fact that Tōshirō went to visit her, but she knew that if she asked about it that she would be stepping over a line that the pair as employer and subordinate would never ever toe. He liked that reassurance and it shocked him at how much he liked Karin's spontaneity and the fact that no matter what she could always surprise him. He thought he had seen it all, but around her he realised that he was totally naive in the ways of the outside world.
"Can I meet them?" she asked her voice as soft and subtle as silk and he felt himself panic, something else that was new, usually he was the stoic and calm Tōshirō Hitsugaya the unflappable genius and prodigy, but around Karin he was the dumb teenage boy with hormone problems. He must have looked troubled he thought because she quickly said, "If I'm over stepping anything I'm sorry, it's just that my dad is a doctor and I sometimes help out as a nurse, I'm told I have a good bedside manner," at the comment about being a nurse all Tōshirō could see was Karin in a pink uniform with a little starched hat and the image was so vivid that he had to glance away for a second, because the idea of her that way was far too attractive for his liking. He could feel the slight heat in his cheeks but he hoped that if he were lucky no colour would show and that Karin would have no idea what was going on in his mind.
After he had agreed to let her come; as if he was really going to say no. She took his hand and it was soft and comforting in his own, it was undemanding, but firm and she squeezed his hand tenderly and smiled softly as if trying to tell him that in the end it was all going to be all right and that no matter what; he wasn't going to shake her off that easy. It was like that every time they visited before they went in the door she would squeeze his hand once and they would walk in together. Then the pair of them would act like Momo was awake sitting there with them chatting to them about the latest movie that was out or the recent dance they had been to.
That was something else he hadn't believed possible before meeting Karin, he had a social life and he enjoyed it. She seemed so proud to have been able to make such a difference in his life in such a short space of time, when it had taken Momo so long to be such an integral part of him. It had taken Tōshirō so long to realise his feelings for Momo, she had already become one of the interns at Soul Serenity Designs under Sousuke Aizen when he had finally realised that he didn't see her as his sister anymore. With Karin however he knew how he felt a lot sooner, but he was loathe to do anything about it. The last thing he wanted to do was to ruin the balance in their relationship.
"Boss you look happy today… did you get laid?" Matsumoto asked with a smile and Tōshirōs' face paled,
"I have no idea what you are talking about Matsumoto" He grumbled as she watered the plants in his corner office, "Did you finish that paper work that I left yesterday or were you loitering in the coffee room with Kira and Hisagi?" He asked eyeing up his assistant who smiled seductively and leaned over the desk purposefully her shirt as usual bursting at the seams, Tōshirō blushed as he tried to look away from the sexual harassment suit before him.
"I don't loiter in the coffee room with Izuru and Shūhei; I was collecting vital gossip about some of the other partners. Did you know that Ukitake-san and Kyōraku-san are planning to retire?" Tōshirō shook his head, "Well they are apparently, according to Kiyone, who then told Shūhei. The pair have decided that maybe it would be better for Ukitake-sans condition if they should take early retirement and live the rest of their lives to the fullest. Isn't that just the sweetest thing ever?"
"I'm surprised you three ever get any work done," Tōshirō grumbled as he got up from his desk, "If you get any calls for me, I'm going to be in a meeting." he stated as he picked up his jacket from the couch,
"Momo or Karin," Matsumoto asked with genuine interest and at the blush that covered his features she stifled a laugh,
"Neither, I'm going to talk to my sempai's about hiring their assistants to replace my own that refuses to do her work!" Matsumoto couldn't help it she laughed and picked up her paperwork sighing. "Oh and Matsumoto… Are you pregnant?" he asked softly, Matsumoto shook her head,
"Not that I know of… why?" she asked a smile spreading across her lips,
"No matter it isn't important," He muttered his face turning violently red.
"Boss were you looking at the girls?" she asked cradling her breasts with crossed arms making them even more precariously placed inside her blouse.
"I said it was nothing," he repeated as he slammed the office door.
"I think I need to meet this Karin and thank her; that is the first time that I have ever seen my boss so happy. I'm relieved," she said to herself as she began to check and file all of the money orders and material lists that he had asked her to do the day before.
Tōshirō strode down the corridor from his office and tried to sort out all his frazzled emotions, he never thought that his sempai's would leave, he always thought that they would stay because like Yammamoto the pair were a permanent feature in Soul Serenity Designs and if they left; the office would never be the same again. He arrived at the large glass panel door that signified his arrival at the pair's shared and spacious office space. He tapped lightly and heard a grunt of affirmation that could only have come from Kyōraku-san. He pushed open the door and popped his head around it. Kyōraku-san was stood at his drawing board scale ruler in hand and Ukitake-san was sat at his desk reading glasses perched on his nose as he reviewed what looked like a purchase order. Kyōraku-san turned around and laughed as he put the mahogany waves that were framing his face behind his ear,
"It seems that Shiro-chan has been told of our plans to elope Jū, whatever are we going to do?" Ukitake-san looked up and smiled softly taking his reading glasses off his nose and placing them on his desk.
"Come sit down Tōshirō-kun," he said pointing to their couch as he picked up a crystal bowl full of M&M's putting them on the table in front of him as he sat on the armchair across from him. "Take as many as you like," he said warmly as Kyōraku-san put down his ruler and pencil and joined them sitting on the armrest of Ukitake-san's armchair.
"You're leaving me here," He said a little forlornly taking a handful of the sweets,
"You'll do fine, you don't need our help anymore; you get more commissions than the pair of us combined," Ukitake-san said as he picked up a handful of sweets for himself and ate them every so often passing one to his partner, who was partial to the blue ones.
"That doesn't seem to be the problem Jūshirō, I think the Shiro-chan is here for another reason all together." He rubbed his hand over his stubble before he spoke again, "I think it's a girl." He finished as he put a hand on Ukitakes' shoulder. Tōshirō blushed slightly and nodded.
"Have you ever… loved two people at once?" He asked softly as he averted his eyes so he didn't have to make eye contact with the older men who he trusted with his life. He couldn't imagine either of them ever being unfaithful to the other because they were like two peas in a pod and they obviously cared for each other deeply.
"Yes," Kyōraku-san replied just as softly as Ukitake-san took his hand and held it firmly. "It isn't an ideal situation to be in because it can hurt a lot of people, I was lucky that I only hurt Jūshirō and myself, but it could have been a lot, lot worse." Tōshirōs' head snapped up and he looked at his sempai closely. "Did you ever wonder why we combined offices and made our assistants sit outside?"
"I did but it was never my place to ask…" Tōshirō replied,
"It was because I didn't trust myself around Nanao," He stated and Ukitake-san's face got momentarily dark as if he were waging an internal war that he didn't want anyone else to see. "So Shiro-chan who are the two lucky or maybe we should call them unlucky ladies?" Tōshirō rung his hands through one another,
"Well Momo you know and well… the other girl I met at University, she's on the course I'm taking you know as a part of Gran and Matsumoto's grand plan to make me more like a boy my age… her name is Karin…"
"Kurosaki?!" they asked in unison and in what could only be described as excitement.
"Yes," Tōshirō replied and the older men jumped off the armchair and sat at either side of him on the couch.
"How did you meet?" Ukitake-san asked his eyes warm,
"She almost ran me over with…"
"A football?" Kyōraku-san finished grinning from ear to ear as Tōshirō nodded. The older men nodded to each other completely excited; it had been a long time since he had seen either of them like this. "It's fate Shiro-chan, fate I tell you!"
"How so?" Tōshirō asked,
"Well you know that we are great friends with Isshin Kurosaki right? He used to work for the company as one of the top designers, but he quit before the job ate him alive and instead he went to medical school and it was there that he met his wife. She was such a lovely woman so kind and a great calming influence on Isshin who could never sit still. So since he left we have kept in contact and actually I am Yuzu's Godfather and Shunsui is Karin's." Ukitake-san said, "And a couple of months ago we were having dinner there, discussing with Isshin the pros and cons of leaving the business, and Karin came in talking about how much work Ichigo must be doing since he never came back home. Then the pair of us said it's not unusual if your work sells to be swamped and we told her about you. After that she didn't seem to mind so much that Ichigo wasn't around."
"So I have the pair of you to thank that Karin never seemed to be offended when I had to cut a date short for a client?" The pair nodded and then Shunsui spoke again.
"But back to the problem at hand, you are stuck between offending Momo and possibly hurting Karin, is that right?" Kyōraku-san asked and Tōshirō nodded, "But Shiro-chan it's pulling you apart trying so hard."
"Momo isn't gone, but whenever I'm with Karin I try to convince myself that she is and lately it hasn't even taken that much effort to do so. Even when we visit Momo the one I look at more is Karin… it's like Momo isn't even there. I know it's wrong, but Karin is so…"
"Lovely?" Ukitake-san asked and Tōshirō nodded,
"Awake?" Kyōraku-san added unhelpfully,
"Real?" Ukitake-san finished and Tōshirō was shocked at the old man's boldness, "I hate to hurt you like this Tōshirō-kun," he said picking out only blue M&M's to pass to his partner, "But Karin can love you back, in the state that Momo is in she can't and I am sure that Momo-chan wouldn't want you to wait around for her all closed up, she would by far prefer you to have people other than her that you love."
"But…" Tōshirō started and the older men silenced him,
"No Shiro-chan you can't live your life inside a glass box you need to experience life, make mistakes, love, laugh, be a teenager at University before it is too late, Jū was right Momo can't hold it against you for living your life, she would be happy that you didn't vegetate like she did… sorry that was crass, but you know what I mean."
"So even though you said that loving two people can hurt many, you want me to continue down this road?" He asked, the older men nodded,
"Karin is tougher than she looks give her a chance and you may be surprised." Kyōraku-san said. "Was that the only problem then Shiro-chan?" he asked and Tōshirō shook his head, "Well then what is it?"
"When you leave can I come and visit?" The older men laughed and pulled the small boy in to a bear hug,
"Of course you can," the pair replied, "We would want it no other way."
When Tōshirō left his sempai's office an hour later, he knew what he had to do. If Karin wasn't going to shatter and hate him then he could tell her exactly how he felt, he could tell her that she had made the world move again for him after so many months of it being frozen and stuck in one place. Also that when he was with her nothing else mattered to him except them; that once and for all she had melted the ice inside his heart. He walked in to his office and saw Matsumoto deep in thought, an odd past time for her, but as long as she was working he didn't mind.
"Matsumoto, I'm going out for the afternoon no one called did they?" he asked from the doorway, his assistant turned and shook her head,
"Nothing to report boss, enjoy yourself will you?" she asked and Tōshirō nodded as he closed the office door behind him.
