Music was her soul. It always was. It was her escape. She let it pass through her when she listened to it and allowed it to take over her when she sung. It was no different from the past until now. She supposed that music was just a part of her no matter what seeing as both her parents lived and breathed it. Her mother, not so much, but her father had tasted fame. And now she would too with his help. Currently they were in the studio and she was listening to the best of her ability as he shared another story about getting so wasted he puked on the crowd for the tenth time that month. He shared it with an accomplished smile, like he was proud of the days spent so out of it he didn't know anything except the words he sang. She smiled at his exuberance in telling the tale and tried to focus her attention away from her phone which lit up with a text from a number she thought she would never see on her phone again.

"Then Flash tried to boot me off stage and I clocked him. Threw him right into the crowd. See, had he been telling the story he would have said that he decked me to make himself look cooler and make me look like the idiot, but I'm telling you right now, I knocked him flat on his ass," he continued, his glasses catching the glint of the light when he sat back in his seat.

"Is there ever a story where you don't get wasted or fight with Flash?" Gigi questioned amusedly in an effort to show that she heard most of what he said.

"Uh, no. The drugs felt great and he was always looking for a reason to one-up me," Johnny replied. She snickered and shook her head. They were ridiculous.

"Which reminds me. He hasn't tried to…you know," he mentioned with a gesture of his hand at her. He never did like talking about the possibility that Flash could have slept with her.

"Dad, no. I told you I never let him. I mean, I kissed him," she replied with a shrug, to his disgust. She laughed when he turned away and held a hand to his heart like it physically pained him to hear such things.

"I'm too old to hear that. You're going to give me a heart attack," he groaned, playing it up.

"Well if you didn't do so many drugs back in your hay day then you'd be just fine," she retorted, a bit playful but meaning it at the same time.

"No, I think it would have been the same," he disagreed.

"Is it that revolting?" she questioned.

"Sweetheart, no one wants to know that an asshole like Flash ever had a chance with a great girl like you," he replied. Her eyes softened upon hearing the honesty in his voice but she hid her true reaction behind a small smile.

"Yeah?" she said quietly, uncertain. She hadn't heard such honest praise since…well, there was no use bringing up the past.

"Yes. Honest to fucking god," he swore. That time she did laugh and shook her head. He might not have been such a great father to start out with, but Gigi was slowly warming up to him. It gave her enough courage to bring up a topic with him she had been curious about ever since seeing Victoria Vega again at one of their concerts. Now that they were back home, sharing time together at the studio, she felt she could speak her mind.

"Ok, so no older guys?" she checked.

"Correct," he agreed with a nod.

"You know I don't like younger guys so they're out too," she continued. He nodded again, remembering when she told him of their distasteful traits. He really had been listening. He just wanted to tease her.

"What about chicks?" she quickly inquired, rushing the words before she could take them back. He stared at her for a while before narrowing his eyes at her in a way that told her he was trying to work out if she was shitting him or not.

"You know, I didn't think you would take Joan's words to heart, but if that's what you want, then go chase some pussy," he declared without a hint of judgement. Gigi raised a brow but nodded and canted her head in acceptance.

"Cool," she said, relaxing from the tense posture she didn't even know she held.

"But don't think I won't tell her off if I don't like her. She gets the same treatment as anybody with a dick," he stated with a point of his finger.

"Fair enough," she accepted, a smile curling the corner of her lips. She remembered the time he scolded his bandmates while she stood just outside the door listening. She had waltzed in, confidence exuded in every word she said. She didn't need him to get all protective of her but she couldn't deny that it felt nice to know he cared how she was being treated.

"Alright, now let's figure out what we want to cover for the next gig and then get the hell out of here. I have a bottle of whiskey calling my name back home," he said, turning to go through their song book. She smiled, reminded herself to take a shot with him as a way to thank him for making an effort with her, and then glanced down at her phone.

Tonight at 8 good for you?

She sent her negative reply quickly then turned off her phone and set it aside. She ignored the gnawing guilt in her gut in order to concentrate. It had been a few months since seeing Tori, and Gigi hated to admit it, but she wasn't quite ready to see her again. It was just too much. So she lost herself in music once more. Afterwards, when she was home and taking a shot with Ava and Johnny, she dressed for bed before curling up and closing her eyes. She listened as Johnny got progressively drunker and Ava took him to bed. She rolled her eyes and put in earbuds, blasting Pat Benatar to drown out what she hoped wasn't her father and mother or sorts having sex in the other room.

Their room was on the other side of the house but Ava had a reputation for being loud so it didn't really make a difference. The next morning she woke up feeling restless, remembering almost every detail of the racy dream she had full of a naked Tori Vega lounging on her bed. She couldn't let this happen. She couldn't let her in again. Gigi groaned and got up to eat breakfast, making fun of Johnny when he made an appearance. He shuffled around getting his alcohol and choice of juice after drinking from the carton as always. She was past the gross factor of that. She went back to her bowl of cereal to hide her fond smile. Ava appeared next, already showered but without make-up.

"Are we going to practice at the studio today?" Gigi questioned for anyone who would answer.

"That was the plan," Ava answered after realizing that Johnny wasn't going to.

"I'll go get ready then. Dad. Dad!" she called to Johnny who hadn't heard her the first time but glanced at her the second time.

"Be ready, yeah?" she told him, disappearing into her room and shutting the sliding door behind her. She quickly got ready then met up with the two in the living room. Her father was surprisingly ready on time.

"God, those iguana skin pants are hideous," she commented as she always did every time he wore them. He just rolled his eyes in that 'mom look' he perfected and pushed her to start walking. She smirked but did as he wordlessly asked. They arrived at the studio second to Flash who was already seated and tuning one of his many guitars. The one he held looked a little like the one she had totaled that time she got mad. She wouldn't be surprised if he bought another one that looked like it to replace the one she destroyed.

"Where the hell is Bam Bam and Rehab?" Johhny questioned when they entered. Flash shrugged.

"Don't know. I only got here ten minutes ago. They'll show," he responded indifferently, tweaking a peg just so before strumming again. He smiled his satisfaction and only then gave them his full attention. Gigi wondered how the man could see past his own self-absorbed behavior to pick on Johnny for the very same thing. Perhaps that was why they butted heads so often. They were almost alike in the worst ways.

"I'm going to warm up. Play an instrumental track so I have something to sing along to while we wait," Gigi said, adjusting the mic stand after getting it set up. Johnny nodded and left to toggle with the controls at the booth. A moment later, one of their songs were playing, the strong beat of the drums leading only for the guitar to follow. She was instantly in tune with the rhythm, ready on time to sing the first line.

Let go of my soul.

Let me up so I can breathe.

Gotta find some kind of cover,

From this hold you have on me.

The last line barely left her lips when she happened to look over at the door. Bam Bam and Rehab had finally shown up, but they brought someone with them. She was joking around and laughing with them like they were already buddies. This couldn't be happening. Gigi's grip on the mic tightened but she carried on without stumbling, catching the newcomer's attention immediately.

I'm gonna get right over you.

Yeah, I'm gonna die trying.

Tori wandered further into the room, eyes magnetized to the girl she knew as Jade West, yet she insisted on the new name change any time she was addressed as such. It didn't matter to Tori anymore. She still saw her as the same person she knew before she suddenly ran off. She nodded to Flash and Johnny, Ava giving her a wave she returned, then silently walked to the far wall to listen just as the others were doing.

I can feel you like a fever.

Down in the marrow of my bones.

Sliding like a demon.

Trying to feed my wicked jones.

The husky rough voice was the same, taking Tori back to a time when Jade would whisper sweet nothings in her ear. A shiver ran down her back at the memory and she bit her lip, attracting Gigi's attention. She hated and loved when the Latina did that. She didn't let it distract her. She looked Tori right in the eye when she sang the next line.

I'm gonna get right over you.

Yeah, I'm gonna die trying.

Tori grimaced slightly but covered it quickly enough. Gigi smirked, catching the meaning, and decided to get back at her. She immersed herself in the song, swaying to the beat and letting herself go as if she was back on stage.

I'm gonna drink all night until you fade away.

Oh, yes I am.

Your walk and your talk and my pain will all be erased.

Yeah!

She held the mic firmly yet relaxed, letting the music remove the swirling emotions running rampant in her ever since Tori showed her face months ago.

Everything you ever said,

I'm gonna crush until it cries.

I'm gonna watch you disappear,

Into a cocaine sky.

I'm gonna get right over you.

Yeah, I'm gonna die trying.

The guitar solo tore through the speakers, making Flash smirk as he bobbed his head to the beat. Bam Bam enjoyed his work on the drums and playful nudged Rehab who hadn't really been paying much attention but was knocked back into the present when Bam Bam pushed him.

Gimme my vodka cold.

Gimme my cider hard.

I'm on a mission to forget about you,

Under the champagne stars.

Under the champagne stars.

Under the champagne stars.

Under the champagne stars.

Ooh, right.

She let her voice fade with the last of the song, the drums and the grating of the guitar the last to be heard. Johnny stopped the next song that would follow and came out clapping obnoxiously. Gigi rolled her eyes but cracked a smile at his teasing.

"Great as always. So, who are you?" he said, looking from his daughter to the new face among them.

"Oh, this is Victoria, but she likes to go by Tori. We ran into her on our way here. She asked about Gigi, and when we told her we were in the band with her she asked to come up," Bam Bam happily explained, Rehab nodding along with him. It was just like Tori to be able to randomly make friends with just about anyone. It came in handy this time around.

"And you idiots just let her up here? For all you knew she could have been one of those crazy stalker fans or the goddamn paparazzi," Gigi reprimanded, jabbing a hand at the girl who only frowned in return. That was the Jade she knew.

"She's too nice for that," Bam Bam denied, unfazed by the lead singer's points. Gigi caught Ava's eyes, knowing that she was still patiently waiting to be let in on what was going on. She hadn't pressed for details, which Gigi was grateful for, but at the same time she still wanted to know. Gigi sighed and looked to Tori.

"You want an interview or something? Fine. I'll give you one," she said, stomping to the door.

"Well, come on," she demanded when she got to the door and looked back to see that Tori hadn't followed.

"Uh, Geeg, what about practice?" Flash spoke up, concerned.

"Don't wait up," she replied, yanking open the door and waiting for Tori to walk out.

"Well, you heard her," Johnny said with a sigh. Flash shot him a look. Gigi moved to leave but stopped.

"Play nice you two," she told them, laughing when they both frowned at each other. She shut the door and turned around to see Tori staring openly at her.

"Don't look at me like that, Vega," she stated, the bite to her voice so familiar it comforted Tori despite the harshness of it. She looked away though, and began walking when Gigi led the way out to the street. Their destination was aimless and silence fell between them. Only the sounds of the city surrounded them. After some time passed, Tori took the plunge and began the conversation.

"You sound great," she offered. Jade scoffed.

"You act like you never heard me sing before," she responded.

"Not songs like that," Tori persisted. Jade only hummed a reply, eyes deliberately kept forward.

"Jade-" she tried again but was cut off.

"Don't. Please," Gigi requested, a tint of pain in her voice. Tori fell quiet at the sound and expression creasing her fair features.

"I can't call you by a name I'm not comfortable with," she muttered, unable to speak any louder.

"Then don't address me by a name at all," Gigi responded. Tori sighed but nodded.

"Are you ever going to tell me why you left?" she asked carefully. Gigi closed her eyes for a moment, took a breath, and then opened them. She dropped her eyes to her beat up black boots, giving Tori some time to get a good look at her. She hadn't seen Jade so casual before. She wore torn black hip hugging jeans and a T-shirt emblazoned with the name The Heathens. Her hair tumbled in natural waves over her shoulders. Tori wished she could run her hands through it again like she used to.

"The decision to leave hit me the day my mother told me the truth about my father," Gigi began, so suddenly that Tori almost didn't catch what she said. They came to a bench where Gigi sat down and Tori followed suit, making sure to put space between them even though she would like nothing more than to sit as close as possible.

"When you started ignoring me," she recalled. Gigi tensed, hands clenching into fists.

"I wasn't trying to ignore you," she murmured, brows pulling down over her nose and eyes studiously on the ground.

"Go on," Tori implored, unwilling to miss the story just because she upset her. Gigi took another breath before continuing. And so the story finally came out. She was born in Ohio and spent much of her childhood there. Her second year of junior high up to graduation was spent in LA where they had moved to further her dreams of performing. Her mother never approved and tried to direct her into something other than singing. It left Jade feeling unappreciated. With a step-father who couldn't care less what she did no matter how hard she tried and a controlling mother, she became bitter, creating the closed off person Tori had met in high school. But Tori managed to work her way past those walls she built and saw the person she was underneath. They realized their feelings for each other by their junior year, but their senior year brought the news of her real father. Her mother finally felt she should know the truth she kept from her. After battling the pros and cons of telling her daughter, she finally sat her down and told her everything. How her father was Johnny Rock who left because he was trying to spare her from his destructive ways, not knowing that she was pregnant.

She didn't bother telling him either. So Jade was raised by her mother, all alone until she remarried. A mother who didn't want her little girl to grow up and make the same mistakes as her father, so she neglected to keep in touch with the rock star, let alone tell her daughter about him until then. The decision to keep her away did the opposite, so that all she wanted was to have the fame and fortune her father had at one point. She vowed to leave as soon as she could, find him, and demand that he help her hit it big. She hated the lie she had been living and left it all behind along with her old identity. The money her mother gave her when she left, the only thing she could offer since she couldn't stop her, helped to pay off a few people who made it happen. In just a few days, Jade no longer existed and Gigi was on her way to finding her father, Johnny Rock. It wasn't easy. She struggled with being alone and took some time to find herself. She had to figure out exactly what she wanted before approaching him. It was three years of jumping from place to place, maturing, but she felt stronger for it. By the time she arrived to turn Johnny's life around, she wasn't the same person she had been, and it showed.

"I still remember the day you broke up with me," Tori remarked after some time spent in sad silence prevented either from speaking. It had been a week after graduation.

"I do too," Gigi responded, glancing at the girl sitting next to her.

"It hurt, so much," Tori said, her voice wavering. Gigi hoped she wouldn't cry. It was her personal weakness. She hated seeing Tori cry.

"I know," she replied, her own voice tight. A hand rested on her shoulder and she looked up.

"How could you make such stupid excuses valid when you know me? I would have done anything I could to help you," Tori told her, anger and hurt seeping into her sorrow. Gigi tried to look away but the hand at her shoulder grabbed her by the chin, forcing their eyes to stay locked.

"Jade," she stated, a warning and a plea mixed into one.

"I don't know. I guess I was scared. I didn't want to drag you down. I figured that if I just broke things off, I would never have to know whether you would go with me or not. You could live your life just fine should I fail chasing a dream I wasn't completely sure about and it wouldn't affect you," Gigi gasped out, on the brink of tears. She hadn't felt this emotional and shitty since confessing a few of her thoughts and fears to the therapist. Here she was doing it again. But it hurt so much more now that it was Tori and not some old fart who threw in the towel days later. He gave up on them, but Tori wouldn't give up on Jade. She shook her head, fighting back tears.

"You idiot," Tori stated, making Gigi laugh through her own building tears. She nodded in agreement.

"I would do anything for you. I would go anywhere for you. I stupidly fell for you ever since that day you told me how you felt and we kissed for the first time," Tori admitted. That had been a moment of weakness for both of them. They became close after that, trying to sort out how they felt before deciding to go out. Almost a little more than a year of bliss together only for Jade to cut it off.

"Tori…" Gigi attempted to say, but there were no words she could use to properly say how sorry she was. Tori wrapped an arm around her, hugging her close. The hand at her chin cupped her cheek and then their noses were barely touching. Tori leaned in, lips brushing Gigi's own, but she pulled away at the last minute. She stood up quickly, detaching herself from Tori before she wouldn't be able to.

"I can't. I'm sorry," Gigi muttered, eyes downcast. She took one last look at Tori before striding away, intent on getting back to the studio and singing her heart out. It did a good job of helping her forget. She didn't look back, but she didn't have to. Tori never truly left her thoughts and she never would. Nothing could change that. But the fear of making herself vulnerable again, of being that weak person from her past, was too much to accept. And so, she left Tori alone on the bench while she walked away from her again.