So matchbookjealousy wanted to know what was going on in Ryder's head. I was gonna just rewrite it from his POV, but I decided to do it like this instead. Hopefully this fills in the missing pieces.
At this rate, I kinda wonder if this is gonna end up being a complete fic, since people keep prompting more. Hopefully not though, because I have another one-shot that I want to work on.
Jake and Ryder are lying on a picnic rug in Ryder's back yard. It's the first really nice day since the snow disappeared, and they didn't want to be cooped up inside. They're lying perpendicular to each other, Ryder's head resting on Jake's chest. Jake cards a hand through Ryder's hair, the other resting on Ryder's stomach, tangled with ten other fingers.
Jake finds himself thinking about how they got into this situation. Eventually, he breaks the silence, hoping for an answer to the question that's plaguing him. 'Hey babe, how did you work out I was Katie?'
Ryder doesn't reply for a moment, instead turning Jake's hand over and over in his own. 'It started with that conversation in the library. Just the fact that you were so caught up in it. And I saw the way you deflated when I said I wouldn't be into a guy. When you said you wanted French fries, it reminded me how Katie loved French fries. For about a second, I thought you might have been Katie.'
Ryder falls silent at that, and Jake uses his hand to tilt Ryder's head towards him. 'And then, a week later, you were telling me you knew?'
'Yea, well, it turned out I couldn't get the idea out of my head. I found myself going over everything you ever said, rereading every conversation with Katie. And I watched the way you acted. It got to the point where it was super obvious.' Jake feels slightly embarrassed at this, but Ryder just laughs lightly before continuing. 'I wasn't gonna say anything. But I saw how upset you were. I wanted you to know you had more chance than you thought.'
'But still not much?'
Ryder rolls to his side at this, cupping Jake's face with one hand. 'I'm here now, aren't I?'
'Yea,' Jake mumbles in agreement, hating that he feels so vulnerable. 'But why are you, though? Why am I the one exception?'
Ryder chuckles. 'I don't really know. When I thought about Katie being a faceless girl, I was excited. A faceless guy, no way it was gonna happen. When I thought about you, I could kinda imagine it happening. And that kinda scared me. I really didn't know what to think.'
Jake's getting uncomfortable, so he sits up carefully, supporting Ryder until he can settle him in his lap. Ryder runs a hand gently against his stomach as Jake begins to speak. 'That must have been confusing for you. No wonder it took you so long.'
'I'm sorry about that.' And Ryder looks like he feels genuinely guilty. Jake smooths Ryder's hair off his forehead, thumb running back and forth reassuringly.
'Hey, no, it doesn't matter. You're here now, remember?' Ryder smiles at this, but he still seems unsure. 'So, what made you fall for me? Was it my handsome good looks?'
Ryder actually laughs at this. 'No. Although you are definitely cute,' he adds hastily, in response to Jake's feigned hurt. 'I was just attracted to you, I'm not even sure why. I just kept thinking about all the reasons why I loved having you as a friend. And I eventually realised that those reasons made me want to date you. But I think the tension is what clued me in most.'
'Oh, so I wasn't imagining it, then.' He means it as a joke, but at the same time Jake can't help but feel relieved.
They fall silent for a while, and Jake starts to think Ryder is falling asleep. Suddenly though, he speaks up. 'Jake, can I ask you a question.' He nods in response. 'Why did you create Katie?'
Jake breathes in deeply before answering, wanting to get the wording right. 'Because I was in love with you. And I wanted you to love me back, at least in some capacity.'
Ryder's watching him with wide eyes, and suddenly he's scrambling out of Jake's lap, sitting up and turning so that they're face to face. 'You love me?' It comes out as a whisper.
'Yea, I do.'
They're so close now, and when Ryder replies, Jake can feel the ghost of his breath on his lips. 'I love you, too.'
