Chapter 3: Fear

A loud cry came from Callie as she shot up in her bed. It was that same nightmare again—the one where Kadaj raped her until she burned. Cold sweat trickled soaked through her covers and night clothes and she was trembling violently. She stripped of her night clothes and laid in her bed curled up in fetal position, trying to forget her nightmare. As she closed her eyes and tried to relax, the nightmare began resurfacing so she gave up entirely.

She got up from her bed and pulled a pair of new pajamas on. Then, she opened the door quietly and left her room. She walked out to the parlor of the lodge and sat down on the couch. It was still dark out—probably four or five in the morning—but even that didn't help her. After all that she went through, she developed a fear for the dark. The dark was evil and it drove her crazy. When Kadaj held her captive, the only thing she knew was the dark.

"Callie?" That smooth, silky voice was familiar, and she turned to see Rufus walking out of her room. "Are you all right?"

To hide her welling tears, Callie nodded and turned away. "I'm fine," her shaking voice betrayed her tears. "I'm fine." She kept repeated the words like a mantra until she burst into bitter tears.

Her cries woke the rest of the Turks and they just stared at the crying woman, not knowing what to do. Elena went to pat her on the shoulder but Reno and Tseng pulled her back.

"We already tried that," remarked Reno quietly to the blonde, "it just made it worse."

"Um, Callie," said Tseng as gently as he could, "would you like some water?"

Still sobbing, Callie shook her head and clenched her fists. "I can't stop…" she cried piteously. "I can't stop…"

"Crying," added Rufus helpfully to the confused Turks. "She can't stop crying."

"We can see that," replied Reno. "What did you do to her, sir?"

"Nothing," answered Rufus, sounding affronted.

"Make it stop," wept Callie, gasping. "Make it stop!"

Elena felt sorry for her. "Callie—" she started gently, but she was broken off by Callie screaming, "Somebody, sedate me!" before she lapsed into tears once more.

Moving fast, Tseng grabbed some sedatives for Geostigma patients and injected it into Callie. Her mournful cries turned into soft whimpers and she began calming considerably. Once she was asleep, the four Turks and Rufus exchanged a look before gazing at Callie once more. They all felt bad for her because no one deserved the pain she went through. It made Rufus hate Kadaj even more. How could anyone do something so vile, he'd never know, but he had to be there for her. It was all he could do to her.

A few hours later, Callie awoke in her bed and Elena sat there watching her. Once again, Callie began crying but it wasn't as bad as before. Elena didn't know what to do because she never went through this before. She didn't know whether to touch Callie or not because Callie kept distancing herself from comfort. Elena watched helplessly as Callie, feeling totally clueless.

Suddenly, Rufus walked in, looked at Callie, and then to Elena. He moved to touch Callie but Elena's voice stopped him.

"She doesn't want to be touched," explained Elena quietly, her caramel eyes full of sadness.

Despite that, Rufus slowly placed himself next to Callie and wrapped his arms around her waist. Instead of pushing him away, Callie buried her face into Rufus's shirt and wept quiet, heartbroken sobs. The young Shinra president rubbed Callie's back soothingly and stroked her hair. Elena took that as a cue to go so she stood up and left the room quietly.

"It's okay, Cal," he said gently, rubbing her back. "It'll be okay…I'm here, Cal…I'm here…You'll be okay…I won't leave you…I'm sorry…"

"Sir…" she whimpered, trembling violently.

"I love you," he whispered lovingly, stroking her wet cheeks. "I love you, Cal."

Callie wept bitterly as she shoulders quaked. "Sir…" she whimpered pitifully. "Sir…I-I can't…I need…Ugh…" Once again, she broke off crying.

"Shh…" murmured Rufus, stroking her hair, "shh…it's all right, Calliope. I'm here for you…I'll never leave you again. I'm sorry…"

Callie clung to Rufus like he was her life preserver and she drifted off to sleep. Rufus stayed with her, holding the woman he loved more than life itself.

That afternoon, Dr. Harper visited again and she did a check up on Callie. The results were better than last time: The bruises were yellowing, the scars were healing, her skin tone was returning to normal, and her vagina was healing. The psychological inflictions were healing, slowly but surely, but Jessica still wanted to monitor it. Sometimes, she told Rufus, a memory would cause victims to relapse into PTSD.

Jessica also revealed something: She was dating Reno. It shocked Rufus but it made sense. Reno liked to sneak off, not telling anyone where he was going; he was attached to his phone the past few weeks; and sometimes he wasn't around during night time. She also knew Callie from Reno's stories of her.

"I wasn't sure if you were his past lover," Jessica revealed to Callie, "but when I saw you, I was sure because Reno told me all about you."

Then, she flashed a megawatt smile at the two. "Mr. Shinra, Callie is a very strong girl," she said gently, squeezing Callie's arm softly. "You should be proud of her."

"Oh, I am," replied Rufus gently, hugging Callie tightly. "I am."

Callie only let the hug last for a few seconds because she grew increasingly uncomfortable in Rufus's arms. In her mind's eye she saw herself being violated by Kadaj again. "Get away from me!" she cried, pushing Rufus away from her. "Don't touch me!" Tears began to pour down her cheeks like rain on windows.

Rufus stared at the woman, feeling more shocked than insulted. "What did I do?" he asked helplessly, looking at Jessica for help.

The doctor's smile faded and she placed a hand on Callie's quaking back. "It's nothing personal, Mr. Shinra," she answered softly as Callie rested her head against the doctor's chest. "This incident with Callie has shattered her trust in men. Most victims tend to isolate themselves from friends and family."

Now, Rufus was desperate. "What do I do, Dr. Harper?" he asked quietly. "I don't want Callie to be afraid of me forever, and I most certainly don't want her friendships to suffer."

Jessica nodded grimly. "Let's talk outside," she whispered to Rufus, then she spoke to Callie gently. "Callie, I'm leaving the room to talk to Mr. Shinra, okay?"

"Can you send Elena in?" the woman asked in a muffled voice, refusing to look Rufus in the eyes.

"Of course, dear," Jessica replied softly, detaching herself from the poor victim. "Follow me, Mr. Shinra."

The two walked out of the room and Elena walked in to console Callie, just as the woman wished. So Callie couldn't hear, Rufus and Jessica walked outside and stood on the deck of the lodge. Rufus took a deep breath of the pine and felt himself calm considerably. Then, he turned and looked at Jessica for inquiry.

"You see, Mr. Shinra," said Jessica, placing her hands on the railing of the deck, "Callie will be hard to get through to. Most victims tend to avoid the problem of the rape entirely, even refusing to tell anyone about it. It might be a good idea for her to see a psychologist but Callie won't agree to this…at first. At some point, Callie will hit a rock-bottom point in the duration of her recovery and will need to see a specialist. I'll refer you to a great psychologist who specializes in this field of medicine. You're going to need it too."

That last sentence caught Rufus's interest. "Why?" he asked curiously. "I wasn't the one assaulted." It wasn't that he was pinning the blame on Callie, he was just merely curious.

"You are the closest person to her, correct?" asked Jessica, her eyes hardening like sapphires.

"Yes," replied Rufus, nodding. "Next to Reno, Rude, Elena, and Tseng, I'm the closest person she knows."

Jessica nodded, digesting the information. "Have you been experiencing anger or violence towards the person who assaulted Callie?" she asked intuitively, staring at him intently.

Rufus couldn't deny it. "Yes," he answered sheepishly as if feeling shame for exposing such feelings. "The fact that I know who did it makes it worse."

Jessica hummed and nodded in understanding. "With the help of a therapist, you can get rid of those feelings," she said quietly. "That's the only way you can help Callie aside from supporting and helping her in any way."

"I understand," said Rufus tonelessly, lowering his eyes a bit. "How long will it take for Callie to trust me again?"

"I'm sorry but I don't know," answered Jessica sadly. "It depends on how traumatic the rape was and who the person was. Looking at Callie's condition, I'll guess a few months, maybe longer. I'm sorry, sir. If I had all the answers…" she trailed off, shrugging helplessly.

"It's all right, Dr. Harper," said Rufus quickly. "Every person is different. Not all them heal the same." As he said that, it felt like a hot air balloon deflated in his chest.

"Poor Callie," murmured Jessica, shaking her head slightly. "No one deserves to be violated like she has been."

"I want her to get better," said Rufus quietly, clenching his fists tightly. "I love her…"

"I know you do," replied Jessica, placing a hand on his arm. "I could see the way you look at her. It's the same way Reno looks at me. You love her, you don't want to be without her, and you would kill for her."

A choking sensation fill Rufus's throat and all he could do was nod. Jessica had hit the nail on the head. He loved Callie more than anyone and he'd be nothing without her and he would kill for her. The blond lowered his head and felt tears burn his eyelids. God, he wanted to hold Callie and tell her everything would be okay.

"I'll be back in a few days to check on her," Jessica's voice broke through his hazy depression and he looked up at her.

"Thanks again, Dr. Harper," he managed to say and he handed her a couple of Gil.

Jessica took the Gil with a nod and began to walk down the steps of the lodge. Suddenly, she stopped and turned to look back at Rufus.

"I'll talk to that psychologist for you and Callie," she said, giving him a sharp look. "And don't even think about avoiding it because this is the only way to start Callie's healing. You need to be there for her, Rufus, and the only way you can do that is if your mental health is in check too."

Once again, Rufus was too overcome to speak so he settled for nodding instead. Jessica nodded once and turned away again. She walked down the steps and went to check on the other patients who had Geostigma. With all that was happening to Callie, Rufus actually forgot that he had the stigma but then he felt the pain in his muscles again. Inhaling sharply, Rufus turned on his heel and walked back into the lodge.

When Rufus got to Callie's room, he saw her lying in bed with an expressionless look on her face. Summoning all his strength, Rufus walked over to Callie's bedside and placed a hand on top of hers. He felt her flinch but she didn't make a move. Rufus felt his heart leap in his chest because he knew this was the first step in getting better.

"Callie, can you hear me?" he asked her gently, still keeping his hand on hers.

All he got was a slight nod and that encouraged him to continue speaking.

"I love you," he whispered, placing his hand on her brow. "I don't want to be without you. You are the only one who's good for me. I will never leave you to fend for this on your own, do you understand me? I won't leave you." With that, Rufus pulled Callie's hand close to his face and he kissed it gently.

Tears welled up in Rufus's blue eyes and he dropped Callie's hand. With a gasp, Rufus began crying earnestly and he made no attempt to wipe his tears away. This was indeed the first step—the first step in recovery.

A/N: Sad but sweet! I hope you enjoyed it! Next week, I'm going to a week-long camp so I won't be able to update anytime soon but enjoy this! R&R! No flames!