A/N:
It's been forever since I updated, huh?
Oh well.
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Damn.
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I wish Hatori would leave me alone.
All he ever does is NAG NAG NAG.
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"I don't! That hurts my feelings!"
"OFF WITH YOUR HEAD!"
"…"
"I mean feelings! Off with your feelings!"
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So Akito threw a cup at Hatori. It made his eye bleed.
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"Woo! Now Hatori has no feelings left!"
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But then, Akito said I had to take off my pants.
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I didn't want to.
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"Yuki can assist you, if you like."
"Hells yeah! (takes off)"
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But Yuki never came! It was all a lie.
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Oh well.
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I went to Hiro's house the day before tomorrow.
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"What do you want?"
"I just need to borrow some of those mags you keep under your bed."
"I don't have any over my bed. They are under…"
"…?"
"YO MUMMA'S!"
"Gasp!"
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Who knew?
Who knew Hiro's stash was under my own mother's bed?
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So I went home to find them.
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"Hatsuharu, why are you under my bed?"
"Um… no reason."
"Are you black?"
"Nope."
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I hate how everyone asks me that whenever I do something weird.
"Are you black?" should be a trademark question to me.
Eh!
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"Tohru, what are you doing standing to close to me?"
"Your pants are still off, so I'm getting a good look at your package."
"O.O"
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Now, now Tohru? What have you been hiding from us?
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"Not much."
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Damn.
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I thought I unveiled a big secret, or something.
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"Hey Haru?"
"Yeah, Kyo?"
"You're package is like... whoa."
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Yeah! My package rules.
God delivered it, I signed for it.
My package.
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"I didn't do anything!"
"Go away, Akito!"
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Idiot.
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"Hey, Haru?"
"What do you want Kakeru?"
"Machi is all depressed because Yun wont touch her unless it's with a knife. Reckon you could cheer her up?"
"…Yes."
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And so, we had a kinky afternoon in the janitorial closet.
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But Rin found out.
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"j00 s3d j00 0nly l0v3d m333!1!11!eleven!1 j00 L13D 2 m3!"
"I don't love Machi, Rin. She's a sex mate of mine."
"Huh?"
"Kind of like Shigure to you, wh0re."
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I pwned Rin.
Muahaha.
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"I have my feelings back! I wish to tell you how appalued I am!"
"Hatori! It's you! Oh no!"
"Put some clothes on! I'm outraged!"
"Get off me! Leave me alone!"
"Stop yelling you fool!"
"Why don't you!"
"…I'm sorry."
"As you should be."
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I saw Ren in the gardens too.
I went over to her.
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She complained how much smaller Akito's boobs were than hers.
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"Shouldn't you be happy your boobs are bigger?"
"Yes. I'm happy that I'm winning. But I can't help but wonder why my boobs are triple D's are hers are as big as peaches."
"Maybe because you forced her to wrap them up and squish them flat so she looked like a man."
"GO AWAY HATORI!" (me and ren)
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Wow. Life sure is weird.
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"Are you black?"
"NO, DAMMIT!"
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A/N:
Well. Thanks for reading.
