Disclaimer: Not mine.
A/N: You guys are great, totally motivating me to write faster and update even more so. ;) I've got to do some writing though because I've managed to run through most of the stuff I've got. I've got some stuff written but that's much much later in the story. :P So it might be a little bit before the next update but I'll try to do one before I head off to school.
Thanks for reading guys! You're awesome. :)
Let me know what you think!
-S
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Chapter 3: Somewhere Only We Know
Oh, simple thing, where have you gone?
I'm getting old and I need something to rely on
So tell me when, you're gonna let me in
I'm getting tired and I need somewhere to begin
-Somewhere Only We Know, Keane
I lowered my hand slowly, trying to communicate a sense of peace but I knew there was no way it could understand me. Strangely I felt less afraid of it now that it had noticed me; perhaps it was because the thing I'd been most afraid of had already come to pass.
Or perhaps it was the loss that I had suffered. There was nothing left for me to live for now. Vengence, justice, truth, it was addictive, but it wasn't a reason to live. I had no pull, no force to hold me to the earth and it was becoming apparent.
I never though I'd be suicidal-the word seemed to harsh, to juvenile for what I was feeling. It was more the absence of a will to live, rather than a need to extinguish my terristrial life.
I waited; it was the wolf's turn to move.
It took a step forward and it took everything in me to stay there and not run. It took another step; its great paws jostling the ground a little with each step. I felt the tremors hit me, and I unconsciously steadied myself and then stilled instantly at the creature's answering growl.
Stay still, stay still, stay still.
It was almost close enough to touch now and I was shaken by how beautiful it was. The great snout was surrounded by the most perfect, plush fur: an incredibly dense brown that looked almost black. And the eyes; oh they were so achingly familiar; they were so, so-human.
It paused. Unmoving. I took a breath unsure what to do next. And there we stayed, staring at each other for a good long while.
Time seemed to stand still, as we maintained our stillness, each of us trusting that the other would not move, would not disturb the great peace that came over us. And for the first time in a long time, I felt completely calm.
The mystery of my parents' disappearance, the unyielding Cullens and their heart-shattering confessions, and the mystery of what had really happened to my parents all faded into the background. It was only the great, magnificent creature before me and I.
It didn't seem to want to hurt me. That much was clear, there was no menace in its face, just complete stillness. The eyes, however, were so alive; they were such a beautiful, vivid brown. I could barely believe they were animal. There was such intelligence, such awareness, I felt as if it were looking down into my very soul.
And I felt it. This astounding sense of kinship. I wanted to raise a goblet in the air, matching the height of its gorgeous snout. We're not alone anymore, you and I, we have each other now.
Because I couldn't fathom that there were more of these. It was such-such an archaic creature, as if the world had moved on from it, and it had survived in the woods unaware, and uncaring.
I let out a breath and it moved then. The motion was so achingly slow that it was not until it reached the ground that it registered that it had moved at all. Its great paws left out in front and it stretched back on its hind legs, the lovely snout dragging the floor.
I was dumbfounded.
This beautiful creature sunk into what was unmistakably a bow.
I felt my knees drop to the floor then and I placed my hands out and feeling only a little ridiculous, I mimicked it. It didn't seem right to me that such a royal creature was prostrate while I just stood there.
My hair fell forward and I was blind, but I stayed still. I could barely believe what I was experiencing but this creature was amazing and after all this if it wanted to eat me, I would offer myself up willingly.
Because I had felt it again. That spark that I had missed. I would have come back here everyday if it let me escape. Because I knew, I knew for certain that it felt as I did. That it needed me just as much as I needed him.
And then, a soft, oh incredibly soft, and slightly wet nose butted my forehead, and nudged me upwards. I looked at it in shock before sitting back and crossing my legs. The wolf sunk down comfortably, sprawled over the floor, taking up a ridiculously amount of space.
Its head was angled towards me, the eyes never leaving my face. I didn't know what to do.
I lifted my hand and pushed it forward but just as I was about to touch it, it growled, the sound rumbling deep in its chest, and I shrunk back quicker than I would have thought possible.
It drew up to its full height and snarled, the ivory teeth bared, their razor sharp edges pointed and fierce. I felt my heart jumping almost out of my chest and I couldn't believe how stupid I had been.
Did I really think this was some sort of Dr. Dolittle moment?
I scuttled back on my arms and legs, forgetting all my preconceived notions about stagnation being the best option and the familiarity I'd felt with it.
It settled low on its legs like it was about to prance and I ducked just as the great form shot over my head and disappeared into the woods behind me. I heard it cantering away, the great paws thudding against the soft forest floor as it ran far, far away from me.
I fell back against the floor, in complete and utter relief before picking myself up and switching on my flashlight.
Running blindly to my left, I kept on, avoiding bushes and jumping over roots, anything to get away from the creature. Suddenly I didn't feel so secure in our bond.
I heard the thundering steps again but now they were sounding out not from behind me but out to my left. I glanced over and flashed the light through the trees and almost fell over in shock. A great silhouette was running parallel to me, but it never wavered, just maintained the exact same distance.
I kept moving and a sudden thought came to me. I stopped for a second and ran backwards but the great shape stopped moving but made no motion to keep following me. And then suddenly it started to get closer
I hurriedly ran back in the direction I was going as I predicted it went back to its original distance from me. Content, it seemed, to run beside me as long as I continued down in this vein.
Where are you taking me?
But to my complete surprise, I reached the edge of the wood, just as the end of my street and the creature howled once, a long sorrowful sound before disappearing.
It had taken me home.
It must have just been a coincidence. It must have.
It was just playing with me.
I laughed giddily then, feeling outrageously happy at this small gesture. But it had been a long while since I had dome something so completely reckless and had it pay off.
I looked over my shoulder, waving a small hand, feeling slightly ridiculous but to my great surprise, I heard panting,
Looking behind me, and seeing the dark house ahead and then looking forward into the woods, dense and welcoming, I made a decision.
I didn't want to go home. There was nothing waiting for me there.
I took a step forward back into the woods.
I was going to find out what this beast was.
I wasn't afraid anymore.
It was perhaps ten feet from me, sprawled beneath a tree, but the minute we made eye contact it sunk into a familiar bow.
I offered it a tentative smile before curtseying.
I sunk down to the floor and kneeled before it and froze as it took one, two, three steps towards me.
It was just within arms reach again. I sat on my hands this time, quelling any further temptation to pet it; there would be time to try that later.
Instead I wanted to try to calm it down like before. I didn't want to spook it.
There was a pattern here, there had to be.
I just watched it.
And it watched me.
I breathed in and it mirrored me, great whooshing noises joining my own quiet exhale.
And together the two of us just breathed.
The forest seemed to be silent save for the two of us and I welcomed the peace.
Minutes passed like rushing water, pooling away from me. But I didn't feel them go by, I was enraptured. I felt like I was filled with a boundless energy. I felt so alive. I hadn't felt like this, so attuned to the present rather than the past, in weeks.
He was still gazing back me, unwilling to move. So I took the first step.
It was time test this connection.
Moving seemed to be a mistake so I attempted talking.
"Hi." The word rung out, shattering the silence and the creature perked up, it's ears pointing upwards to the heavens. It looked at me with renewed interest.
Okay, that was a good sign.
"I'm Kim." The wolf, I decided it was more of a wolf than anything else, bared its teeth then but it wasn't growling, it almost looked like-it couldn't be could it?
But after a moment of disbelief, I realized it was indeed smiling at me.
I smiled back politely before trying again.
"Do you have a name?" I shifted my gaze but there was no collar, and I felt foolish for looking for one. It's not as if this was someone's pet.
Although, I thought wistfully, it could be mine. I needed something like this. I could barely believe the healing that had begun after only a few minutes with this great creature. But I felt new again. The weariness, the jitteryness, the anxiety: it was all disappearing fast.
No one could take away the sadness.
I'd accepted that, but this, this beautiful creature was helping in a way that I didn't think was possible.
If only it would stay this way forever.
A few moments later I could have sworn it nodded but then it shook its head and let out a sneeze. It sprung up, clearly having surprising itself; before turning around three times and settling down again.
My heart melted, literally, it went from solid to butter in five seconds flat.
"Are you a girl?" A distasteful whine issued out and I ventured another guess.
"A boy, then?" At this his tail began to wag considerably and I just stopped from myself clapping my hands in delight.
It could be coincidence but considering my last few days, I was willing to believe anything. And right now I'd bet my left foot that this wonderful creature could understand me.
"You're lovely, you know that?" I cooed.
It was, and then I corrected myself; he was.
He crept a little closer, scooting on his stomach until his snout was just inches from my knee. He appeared content and then lay down his head over his paws and looked up at me. His eyes, those lovely eyes, that were so achingly familiar, were just at chest level.
I pulled a hand from under me and I felt the creature still and ever so slowly I pulled it forward and placed it on the fur before me. It was as soft as I thought it would be-no, I thought, it was softer.
But I didn't move, I waited instead, wanting to note his reaction. But other than letting out a contented whine and shifting its backside a little, he was fine.
Gently I began to stroke the impressive head that lay on the ground and we sat like that for what seemed like hours. It was just the two of us, away from anything and everyone else, in a place only we could get to.
My arm grew tired after a bit but I just switched to the other one and continued, only pausing to shield the occasional yawn. I slowly sunk lower and lower to the ground until I fell forward onto the soft fur before me, and buried in its intense warmth fell peacefully and deeply asleep for the first time in weeks.
The next morning I woke up in my bed. As I twisted under the downy comforter that my mother had paid an inordinate sum of money to acquire, memories from the night prior started to trickle back to me.
I sat up suddenly, my hands coming up to my face so I could examine them for something, fur, dirt, anything but there was no evidence that I had spent the night in the forest.
So it was a dream, then.
A wonderful, incredible dream.
I felt a crushing disappointment; at least while I was with that beautiful animal I had felt so calm and relaxed and unconcerned with my life. Now everything came crashing back to me and as I turned my gaze around my room and took in the quiet of the house, I realized that that was what I would be hearing for the foreseeable future.
Silence. Empty, unbearable silence.
I looked out the window and into the woods, hopefully.
Are you out there?
But there was no response, the trees just waved menacingly from the chilling wind that was blowing about outside.
I sat up and reach down to brush my pajama pants down; they always rolled up in my sleep, to find that I was still in jeans.
And not just any jeans, jeans with knees that were muddy and dusty from the forest.
My gaze whipped back to the forest.
I had gotten my answer. But now I just had thousands more questions. For starters, how on earth had I gotten back to my room?
I looked deep into the forest, half expecting to see his eyes staring back at me but there was nothing but trees and emptiness as far as the eye could see.
What are you?
