So, in case you didn't notice, I've changed the name of this story to If You Love Me. After working on chapter 4, it just felt like the real title of the story.
Generally, when I write or read yaoi, it's smut. But I tried to write this a little bit sweeter. It's probably more on the fluff side, but it's not what I'd consider fluff. Please review and let me know how I did!
Chapter 3
It had been two weeks since Feliks had sent his letter to Toris and there was still no response. Every day, Feliks would wait by the door for the mail. Every day, he would go though the mail looking for Toris's handwriting on the front of an envelope. But after two weeks of waiting, Feliks knew something was wrong.
"Hello," the voice on the other end of the phone answered.
Feliks took a deep breath to calm himself. "Alfred," he began slowly, "has Yao told you anything about what Ivan did to him?" Yao had been staying with the American, so Feliks knew his was his best option.
There was a long pause from the other end of the line. Feliks heard a door close and knew Alfred must have gone into a different room. "He hasn't said much. Why?"
"I'm scared. I think that Ivan may be, like, doing the same thing to Toris." Toris and Alfred were friends, if Alfred was hesitant about telling Feliks something, he would do it for Toris.
"Has he told you anything?" Alfred sounded worried.
Felix shook his head, even though he knew he was on the phone and it didn't really matter. "He totally hasn't told me anything! Why do you think I'm so scared? He, like, hasn't called and he hasn't, like, replied to my letter. I'm worried that Ivan is hurting him."
"Well, I haven't heard anything. But if something is happening, we need to find out."
"How?" Feliks was scared, but he knew calling Alfred was the right idea.
There was silence on the other end of the line. "I'm worried," Alfred finally said. "I have an idea, but I'm worried that if Ivan finds out, the situation could get much worse."
"I don't care!" Feliks shouted into the mouthpiece. "I need to know what's happening to him!"
Alfred sighed. "Alight, fine. We have a World Meeting in a few days in France. It from my understanding, it takes Ivan a day to get to France and a day to get back. He'll be gone for three days."
"What day is the meeting?"
XXX
It was the night before the World Meeting and Ivan had already been gone for several hours. Toris was on his way to cook dinner for himself and his brothers when the doorbell rang.
When he opened the door, he felt his heart stop. "Feliks, why are you here?"
"You never answered my letter." Feliks jumped up and hugged Toris around the neck, causing them both to stagger slightly.
"But I did answer your letter," Toris replied, prying the Pol off of him. "I put it in the mail the day after I got your letter. I'm fine, you didn't have to come all the way out here." He hated lying to Feliks, but if Feliks found out what was going on, Ivan would make both of them suffer. He couldn't let that happen to Feliks, he just couldn't.
"Well, it, like, doesn't matter. I'm here now. Can you take a break, Liet?"
Toris sighed. "I was just about to make dinner."
"Great!" Feliks stepped inside and stuff the door behind him. "I'll join you."
Toris turned and made his way to the kitchen, knowing Feliks would follow. What was he doing here? What if Ivan had been here? No, Feliks could be dense, but he wasn't stupid. He must've known about the meeting. And how could he have not getting the letter? It didn't make sense.
"Vend (Brother), can I talk to you for a moment?" Eduard had come in to the kitchen and seen Feliks sitting at the table. When Toris looked up at him, Eduard gestured for him to come out to the hall.
"What is it?" Toris asked, wiping his hands off with a towel as he stool in the hall.
"What is he doing here?" Eduard whispered.
"Feliks? I have no idea. He just showed up at the door."
"What if Ivan finds out he was here?" He held up Toris's hand, it was still bandaged from when Ivan had swung the knife at him. "This is just because you talked to Feliks after the Conference."
Toris pulled his hand back. "I know. That was the first thing I thought of. But Ivan won't be back for two more nights. How would he find out?" He glared at his brother, accusingly.
"I'm not going to tell him if that's what you're thinking. But we can't guarantee that Raivis won't accidently let it slip." Now it was Eduard's turn to glare at Toris. "Do you plan on doing anything foolish tonight?"
"No, of course not." Toris blushed. He had never tried to hide his past relationship with Feliks, but it was embarrassing to hear his brother talk about it. "I'm not that stupid."
"Okay, good. But if he insists on staying the night, he leaves first thing tomorrow morning."
"That's fine. Now can I go back to making dinner or are you not done here?"
Eduard only walked away, muttering something about 'warning Läti,' so Toris went back into the kitchen.
"What was that about?" Feliks asked when Toris enter the kitchen.
"Eduard doesn't think you should be here." Toris continued cooking, his back to the Pol. "I happen to agree with him."
"You agree?"
Toris still refused to look at Feliks. "Yes. I think you're being careless. You know Ivan hates you. He'll be angry if he finds out you were here."
"What would happen if he got angry?" Feliks was getting closer to what he wanted to hear.
Toris froze. Ivan would probably take his anger out on him, but he couldn't tell Feliks that. "I don't know what would happen," he eventually said.
Dinner went by without incident or mention or Ivan. Most of it was spent with the Baltic brothers in silence as Feliks talked about whatever seemed to be on his mind. When they were done eating, Eduard dragged Raivis out of the kitchen claiming it was time to go to sleep.
"But I'm not tired," Raivis complained as Eduard pulled him out of the kitchen.
"I don't care," Eduard was saying. "You don't sleep well when Ivan's here. You're sleeping now."
The sounds of their argument died down eventually, leaving Toris and Feliks sitting next to each other in the silent kitchen.
"Hey Liet," Feliks said, quietly.
Toris turned to look at Feliks. "Wha-" Feliks closed the space between their lips, cutting Toris off.
"What are you doing?" Toris tried to hide the fear he was feeling, but something in Feliks's expression told him that he had failed.
"What are you scared of, Liet? Is it Ivan? You know, he totally won't know unless you tell him. And Eduard and Raivis have no way of knowing." He kissed Toris again.
But that was exactly Toris's problem. He was starting to think that he couldn't keep any secrets from Ivan anymore.
"You have to go home," Toris said, trying to push Feliks away.
Feliks held Toris's hand back. "No! Liet, I came here to check on you! Ivan isn't here so you're, like, just gonna have to put up with me." He shifted his hand so that their fingers were intertwined and kissed the back of Toris's hand. "And I totally plan on staying the night, so you better take me to your room."
Still hand in hand, Toris led Feliks up to his room, grateful that Eduard and Raivis weren't in the hall. Toris opened the door and was pulled inside with enough force to pull the door shut behind him.
Feliks sat on the bed and continued to pull Toris until Toris landed on top of him, pushing Feliks back on the bed.
"Liet, I thought you were worried about doing anything."
Toris pushed himself off of the blond, blushing. "Feliks, please stop this."
"Like, what's wrong?" Feliks asked, sitting up next to Toris.
"We can't do what I think you want to do."
Feliks thread his arm around Toris's own and hugged it. "Then we can just talk, like when we were kids. Remember, we would tell each other everything." Toris nodded. "So, is there anything new going on with you?"
Well, Toris thought, I'm slowly becoming Yao's replacement. But I'm worried that if I do something about it, Ivan will hurt my brothers. After a moment, he finally spoke. "Nothing's new with me."
"Really?" Feliks asked, an eyebrow raised. "Now that Yao's gone, it seems like Ivan may be giving you more attention."
Toris stared at the floor for a minute, trying to think of a way to change the subject. Finally he spoke. "No, in fact, I've hardly seen Ivan." He moved to pin Feliks down on the bed. "I'm craving attention."
"Liet, what are you-" Toris cut him off by placing both of his hand on the sides of Feliks's face and kissing him passionately.
Feliks didn't respond for a moment, confused about Toris's sudden mood change. But soon he was kissing the brunette back, savoring his taste. He had missed it.
Feliks ran his hands through Toris's hair, deepening the kiss. His hands moved down Toris's back and began to untuck his shirt. Once the back of the shirt had been pulled up, he ran his hands up Toris's back. Toris began to unbutton Feliks's shirt, kissing down his collarbone. Once Feliks's shirt had been thrown on the ground, Feliks's began to undo Toris's shirt.
Toris sat up, kneeling at Feliks's side on the bed. Feliks's pushed himself up onto his elbows, confused. "What's wrong, Liet?"
"We've gone too far."
Feliks put a hand behind Toris's neck and pulled himself up. "My shirt's off. Isn't it only fair?" He began to undo the buttons of Toris's shirt, looking at Toris from under his eyelashes.
Once the shirt was completely unbuttoned, Toris wrapped it around himself, arms folded across his chest.
"Liet, what's wrong? You're totally freaking me out." Feliks tried to coax the shirt off of him, laying gentle kisses over every inch of uncovered skin.
Finally the shirt came off and Feliks looked over the Lithuanian's torso. It was nearly perfect, just as he remembered. There was only one thing wrong. Down by his hip was a series of clearly new scars which formed a word in Russian: Россия.
"What does it say?" Feliks asked, running a finger around the scars.
Toris looked away, on the verge of tears. He didn't want anyone to see that. He hadn't even let Eduard see. "It's says 'Russia.' Ivan says it marks me as his." Now the tears really did begin to fall.
"Why, Liet? Why did he do this to you? What else has he done?" He pulled his friend closet him and let him cry on his shoulder.
"It's because of you," Toris said through his tears. "He said that I was still attached to you and that I couldn't be disloyal if I were to work for him."
Feliks reached down to hold Toris's bandaged hand. "Is that how this happened?" he whispered.
"No," Toris pulled his hand back. "That was a cooking accident. Ivan hasn't done anything else to me. These kind of things happen. Eduard and Raivis have some cuts and scars as well." It was all a lie, but Feliks didn't need to know that.
The Pol's hands moved around Toris's waist and he brought them so close together that they were in complete contact from their hips to their shoulders. "Toris, can you promise me something?" Toris nodded. "Promise me that you'll tell me if anything more happens to you."
Toris moved them to lay down on the bed, side by side. Their legs were tangled together on the bed that was too small for both of them to have space. Their arms were wrapped around each other and their faces were almost touching. "I promise."
Feliks readjusted himself so that his head was resting on Toris's chest. "That's all I needed to hear. I love you, Liet."
Toris pulled Feliks in closer to him, wishing this moment could last forever. "I love you too."
Don't forget to review! I really means a lot to me.
Published: July 8, 2010
Updated: July 9, 2010 - Minor editing. I had typed this chapter on an iTouch.
