James had sent a package and a letter in the post.
There are photos here from Mrs Potter and I. Unfortunately, they're of me! Better luck next time! Lacking a bit of the movey-hovey magicy-wagicy (That's subtle enough, right? right?!) so they're dull as well as disappointing but you'll probably like them anyway because you're like that.
P.S Please, please mind yourself and all that. Me and Evans are busting arteries every day over this and it's not fun you selfish prick.
and a letter from Peter.
Hullo Remus.
Can I say that? I dunno. I just want you to know I'm living with James and Lily now. I hope Germany is okay. I don't know how anything can be good most days. I wonder, do they bomb over there? I sure hope not. Anyway, hope all is well.
Wormtail
It was a pleasant surprise and it was a moment for sentimental purposes to hear from them but he had much more to be getting on with. He didn't count himself full of time to spare from where it belonged. The previous night was the night he first heard the cremating machines. They had churned and they had kept him awake. He feared for the effect it would have on Sirius.
It was not easy for Remus to be something of a werewolf with high scent sensitivity. It meant that he was trouble by the smell of bodies that were burned lingered in his nostrils. Not that he didn't doubt that it was something that ever went away, considering the Nazis placed on the site did not seem to mind. They rather enjoyed it. It was probably like a celebration.
The cooks downstairs, Remus could see, were not as thick-skinned because heard often heard vomiting in the dead of night. The sounds of vomiting was something he was used to and it was in his bones to find the source and comfort it as he did when James had a little too much to drink, or years after when Lily was suffering morning sickness.
As much as he couldn't offer his support, he always made a detour into the kitchen when the door was open. Smiled with a sickened recognition that could comfort them that they were not alone and it was not just a case of gender, picked up a carrot poking out from the bin. He did that because he did not like to see food go to waste and it was not above him to eat only-just gone-off food when the rest of the site chucked everything away left, right and centre or fed it to the pigs rather than starving children that were more well-off than everybody else in range.
Today was his regular visit to Sirius. The boy hadn't made a decision to leave and it was making Remus hostile. He was not aware how long Sirius had spent between the barbed wire and it would be something he would ask today. Germans did not wait around. Not these kind, and he was fairly certain Sirius would be aware of the implications.
Remus walked a different way to the front door, round the back gate manoeuvre. Instead he made his way through the trees and the forest as was likely to be the place where he would go during the full moon. He had checked it out before but it was necessary to have a deeper look. It was coming up, and whereas he had left the last time to an empty cottage miles from the site he couldn't push it and he would have to use the resources around him.
Remus worried for Sirius for when he went under. He knew what Remus was and it was another addiction of evil creatures that already surrounded him.
Remus picked up stones. He wasn't sure why he was doing so. He supposed he was trying war-spirited DIY to form a game of gobstones but he quickly let them go. Sirius was not a boy, and it was a joke that Remus was pondering entertaining him. He needed to get him out but Sirius was stubborn, and they would do it his way. However Remus was rather stubborn himself and he wouldn't go down without a good fight.
Out of the forest, it was proving tricky to find Sirius. When Remus found him he was subject to only two eyes watching him through a gap in wood but it was secluded. Exactly as Remus had advised him. He smiled because although Sirius had complied in knowledge that Remus' criteria was a good one he had made it intentionally a challenge for Remus to find.
Remus' voice was coated with an impressed 'I know what you did but we're not going to discuss it' glow. "This is a very good spot. I applaud you."
Sirius guffawed. Remus knew this meant "Where is the food?"
"I was unable to find you anything today. When I do, maybe you should take it upon yourself to share it around. As fond as I am of you I hope I can do a difference that reaches at less another person."
Remus looked at Sirius. It was the wrong thing to say because his bones were raged against his skin and he did not think he fed him nearly as well as enough as he would want.
Sirius nodded deciding to go for the orange peel perhaps a few weeks old and suck it between his tongue and teeth for substance. Remus' stomach hurt with worry. "I feed Regulus. Everyone else is this place can either go to hell or are doing just fine. I saw a boy crying in the pain with hunger so I gave him something. If I see someone who needs it, I do."
Remus nodded and he started his usual ritual of medically checking Sirius. He could see little this time so he could not perform a full inspection. That didn't stop him from using a couple of charms to rid him of any disease or infection. "You are a brave man and you are a kind one."
"I'm not going to live to be a man." Remus shuddered at the acceptance that escaped from Sirius lips and he regarded the cuts and oh, of course. Bruises. What had he been doing? He didn't ask because Sirius was entitled to as much secrecy as he did but he resented Sirius for sitting in a place which meant he couldn't get to him. That was a functional choice too made by the infamous oppressor in front of him who would not accept help that was not his own and who only allowed Remus to give him medical attention if it was from a wand that he couldn't stop.
Sirius looked at Remus who was sporting a restrained frown. "Are you going to live?"
Remus knew that Sirius meant the approaching full moon. He was constantly exasperated by the boy's consistent eye for detail. He was hoping maybe he'd forgotten that small fact about himself. His voice was reassuring. "I am an old man. I have made it every moon and cycle there has been. There is nothing for you to worry about."
Sirius looked away to his pocket where Remus knew his wand was. Sirius with every visit gazed at it more than the previous one. "Moony."
Remus felt sick. Every coincidence that lay with Sirius lay with his action to forget and dismiss. It reminded him of something very important and he couldn't handle what it possibly meant for Sirius to know personal names that he had. It did not make sense, but what part of Sirius Black did? He attempted not to panic and he answered with a "Yes?"
A signature of being proven right dawned on Sirius' face. Remus regarded Sirius looked frightened. He did not know where the knowledge came from but he was much stronger at coping with it than Remus was. Sirius had already moved on and touched the sole of his bare feet with his filthy hands. "I don't know how I know that," Sirius sounded like he was tasting the word and trying to process what he meant to make the sounds. "...Moony but I don't want you to die, OK? I just know that I want you to live more than I want to stay or get out of here.." he looked complacent. He coughed and looked back to Remus for the first time with watery eyes.
Remus reminded himself how young Sirius truly was. He wanted to talk to him as if he was a grown man but he felt that he would speak to him what he was about to say in same way if he was. He knew it in his skin, and he gave Sirius a bookish kind of look. "If you were an animal, just for tonight to protect yourself in case anything happened to me so I couldn't, what would you be?"
Remus expected Sirius to roll his eyes. He didn't, and Remus found himself hanging onto the cogs that turned in Sirius brain through the windows of grey pools. Remus expected it to be a wizarding animal; something sleuth and self-providing. Protective, but lone. Perhaps with beating wings. When he had asked questions of this sort to Sirius before such as the time he gave him history on the Hogwarts houses for he only knew about one which one he would like to be placed in Sirius had nearly knocked him out when he asked about Slytherin.
Sirius' mouth moved as he thought but it didn't take as long as what was normal for a young boy when faced with a choice of an animal form simply said. "A dog."
Remus couldn't find any signs of disappointment in Sirius' words, only a force of pride and a dog-like grin to accompany and live up to the name. Remus couldn't unsee features of a dog in Sirius' behaviour. Sirius spoke so Remus couldn't. "And I wouldn't be a dog to protect myself. I'd be a dog so I can protect you."-"And Regulus."
Remus smiled. "A very good choice."
"I don't need approval."
"And don't I know it." Remus replied.
