Author's note: I am so so sorry. I've been spending most of my free time trying to clean a very nasty virus from my sister's computer, and then yesterday when I thought I'd be able to come home and relax and get stuff posted, I got to work just as the cops were showing up. Our graveyard manager had been robbed at gunpoint. Bastard got away with over six grand. So my day yesterday was spent handling the deliveries and vendors so that the assistant manager could deal with the police and loss prevention and district people and everything. By the time i got home I was nearly dead on my feet and I don't feel much better today, but typing and sitting don't require a lot of movement, so I finally had a chance to get this up. As part of my apology, I've posted not one, but two chapters for your reading enjoyment! Just my little way of saying thanks so much for not giving up on me! :-D

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"We're home!" called out Rose as soon as they walked in the door. Esme just looked at her oddly. Rose never felt the need to announce herself.

"In the kitchen!" came Alice's chipper reply. They walked in to find a perfectly normal scene. Alice was poring over what looked like the upcoming Versace line for the fall season, and Bella was kicked back, her feet tucked under her as she sat on a chair near the patio door, reading Wuthering Heights. All in all, it was a typical scene...and something about that fact made Esme wonder.

"Okay, something's up. What are you girls planning?" Bella chuckled, and Alice turned to her.

"I told you she'd see right through us!" said Alice as she jumped to her feet to hug Rose, then Esme.

"True." Bella put her book down and stood, also greeting the two. Esme looked at the three of them with a smile on her face.

"Well, this explains why Rose wanted to look for the ugliest carpet in history for her bedroom. Okay, should I close my eyes or something?" Alice shared a conspiratorial grin with the others.

"Absolutely. We're going into the living room, but you're not allowed to open your eyes until we tell you." Esme sighed theatrically, but her eyes were sparkling with curiosity.

"Okay, lead on, my dears." That was all the invitation they needed. The three girls herded Esme into the living room, setting her down on the couch and joining her. Alice nodded at Bella, who grabbed the stereo remote and passed it to her.

"Okay, Esme, you can open your eyes."

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~Whatever my girls are up to, this promises to be interesting,~ she thought as she let them lead her into the other room and sit her down. However, when she opened her eyes, her first thought was a bit confused. The entire room was dark but for the candles flickering around the perimeter. The couch had been pulled almost back to the wall and turned to face the hall doorway, which had been draped with glittering dark green leaf garlands to create a curtain of sorts. The strange part was the eight foot by eight foot platform sitting about a foot off the ground, the top surface of which was one enormous, slightly dark-tinted mirror. And in the center of the reflective platform was a metal pole that reached from the base to where it was anchored in the ceiling some twelve feet above them. Esme suddenly got it.

"You didn't! You did! Oh my...you girls are the best!" The three younger ones wore identical expressions of mischief as they looked at each other.

"Bella had the idea that we should celebrate birthdays sometime, and we decided to start with yours. So, happy birthday, Esme!" Rose leaned over to give the birthday girl a kiss.

"So Bella thought of hiring me a stripper?" Alice just laughed.

"No, the stripper was my idea. But since we weren't sure what appearance was your taste, we went ahead and took the liberty of bringing four of them." Esme's eyes lit up like the Rockafeller Christmas tree.

"Four? Oh my - I don't even know what to say!"

"That's the best part, Esme. You don't have to say a word. These guys come..." Bella chuckled, "...VERY highly recommended."

"So, do you want your present or are we going to sit here and jabber all night?" came Rose's impatient question. Esme smiled at her girls, feeling so humbled that they would go to such lengths. But humility was quickly taking a back seat to curiosity. With a grin she leaned back against the cushions of the couch.

"I want my present," she said firmly.

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They stood in the hallway listening to the conversation.

"I can't believe I'm agreeing to go through with this," murmured Edward so low that only Jasper, standing next to him, could hear.

"You'll have fun, you'll see. Just think of it this way. These are our women. We enjoy making them happy, right?" Edward nodded. "And this will make them happy. Plus, consider this...if we hadn't agreed to be the entertainment, then they probably would have hired actual male dancers, and we'd have ended up sitting there with them watching some other men dance when we know that we've got abilities that go head and shoulders above a normal human's."

"I hadn't thought of that." Edward seemed to be a little more comfortable.

"When do we start?" whined Emmett. Jasper chuckled to himself. Far from his earlier hesitance, Emmett had taken to the new activity like a duck to water, finding that he really enjoyed showing off. Not like that fact was news to anyone else. Even Carlisle was looking forward to this. Just then, they heard the soft, low strains of Lady Gaga's Paparazzi begin in the other room. Pulling the dark hood over his head, watching as the other three did as well, Jasper smiled.

"It's showtime."