For Channing, who loves telling me how much she loves my writing.
Charlie | by Breanne Nedra | February 23rd, 2014
Ned Starling was angry.
No, correction, he was livid. Furious.
In his hand he held a piece of paper, which he promptly balled up in a snit and threw across the room with a cry of frustration. It bounced off his living room window, landing harmlessly on the floor. Somehow, that seemed insulting.
Oooh, Ted! That evil little- Ned slowly dragged his hand down his face in an attempt to calm himself.
The piece of paper was not technically the problem. That was a lame invitation to some Clue hunters reunion that Amy Cahill had set up so everybody could see everybody else again. He was positive that his brother had stuck his fingerprints in there somewhere, and that as soon as Ned showed up he was going to be jumped by every law enforcement agency in D.C. and put on trial for his crimes – assuming they even used court. Technically he had already confessed and it wasn't needed, but the judicial system was humorous that way. Either way, it would end with him behind bars for a very, very long time.
Which was not part of the plan.
And Ned would be more than happy to not show up to the reunion. He would be more than happy to stay home and watch daytime television while everybody else arrived and mingled without him. He highly doubted that he would be missed, anyway; his brother probably didn't care if he attended (assuming Ned was wrong about the cops), and everybody else probably just remembered him as the poor little kid that got blown up, disabled with terrible migraines, and nearly shot in the chest by a psychopath. He hadn't even helped when the Vespers had taken the hostages. (Not that he would have been much help in the first place, but that's neither here nor there.) If Ned was totally honest with himself, even he wouldn't miss himself in someone else's position.
But no. He couldn't just not show up. He couldn't just blow everybody off. It wasn't that easy anymore. Because of Ted. Ned just knew it had to be Ted's doing. Because attached to that infuriatingly colorful piece of paper was a note. A sticky note. In his brother's neat penmanship. Simply it said: Sinead RSVP'd. I figured you'd like to know. - Ted
Right after his name, Ted had drawn a cheerful little smiley face. Just one of the many annoying habits he had picked up during his college days after regaining his sight.
Ned could guess at what Ted wanted him to guess at: that Amy didn't know where Ned lived, so she gave the invitation to Ted to give to Ned since the President probably knew where his twin brother lived. When she gave it to him, she informed him that Sinead was coming, so he opened the letter to add the note so Ned wouldn't miss getting to see his sister for the first time in over a year.
However, Ned was not born yesterday, and could also very easily guess at what had actually happened: Ted told Amy about Ned being The Racketeer since Ted knew that the International Police Force had been out of their minds looking for him, so Amy used her Madrigal resources to stage a reunion and convinced Ted to call Sinead so Ned would be more likely to show up – and when he did, he would be caught and arrested.
… Or something along those lines. Part of him had a hard time believing Amy was the mastermind. She had the prowess for it, but not the personality. He always had admired that about her.
Ted, on the other hand...
Ned felt himself get angry again. Oooh, did his brother know how to bait! Leave it to Ted to find a way to get Ned to come out of his shell. He had been dying to see Sinead for months, and next thing you know, here she is flying across the Atlantic to spend a day with people she doesn't even like? It was a trap. No doubt about it. Ted was going to have police somewhere nearby and at some point during the "reunion" (which was probably as much of a joke as his brother's lame attempt at drawing Ned to it) they were going to jump The Racketeer and put him behind bars for the rest of his life.
Sighing, Ned went over to the other side of the room and picked up his wadded up invitation. In all actuality, there was no proof that Sinead was even going to come. Given the circumstances, Ted's word didn't go as far the balled up invitation had. He was a liar. Until further notice.
But the what if kept nagging at him. If Ned was wrong, and the invitation was seriously just that, and the reunion happening a week after he revealed his secret identity to Ted was just a coincidence, and his brother wasn't lying about Sinead coming... he would be throwing out an opportunity to see her. His sister. He missed her so much that, whenever he allowed himself to think about it, he felt physical pain. He had always thought people were crazy when they talked about feeling physical hurt manifest because of feelings of sadness or loss or something, but over the past few months he had actually been experiencing that himself. Maybe they weren't so crazy.
He stared almost sadly at his brightly colored invitation and the foreboding note with its mocking smiley.
To go, or not to go... that is the million-dollar question...
Having sat in his idling BMW for the last ten minutes and not seeing anything out of the ordinary, Ned was forced to admit that he had probably been acting paranoid a couple days ago when he had first read the invitation. The seafood restaurant at which the reunion was to take place was a rather small establishment known for the pier that stretched out over the water behind it. The pier itself started off as more of a patio, with a big rectangular section just outside the back door; at the back of the patio-like area, however, is when the pier started, and there was a narrow boardwalk-like stretch of planks that reached its way over the water. According to the invite, it was on the patio that the reunion was taking place.
Slowly, Ned cut the engine and slid his way out of his car, looking around some more. No police. No men on cellular phones with an abnormal fascination with everything but him. No overly curious children that needed to mind their own business. He seemed to be completely alone out in the parking lot.
He walked cautiously to the door as he attempted to decide whether the solitude was good or bad.
A cheerful brunette with extremely curly hair bounced up to him as he came through the door. She was in the khaki slacks and harbor blue polo shirt that was the uniform of the establishment. "Hello, my name is Carrie! Table for one?"
"No, I'm actually here for the reunion."
"Oh! Right this way."
She led him over to the patio door and promptly excused herself and left him alone. Which was good. Now he could do a little more reconnaissance.
The patio was full of people he recognized. Jonah Wizard stood out like a neon billboard in his dark skin and leather jacket (which he seemed to wear no matter what the temperature was like). The next man to catch Ned's attention was Hamilton Holt, but that was probably only because he was six inches taller than everybody else. Next he saw Amy Cahill and Nellie Gomez, who were talking to Hamilton. Then he saw Reagan Holt, talking to Dan Cahill; and Madison Holt, who had just went over to say hi to Jonah. And the snooty Ian Kabra, talking to... Sinead. Sinead Starling.
Ned nearly felt his heart stop. Sinead was here. She actually had decided to come. Ted hadn't lied when he said she had RSVP'd.
Speaking of Ted, where was the little sneak?
Ned took a step to the left to glance around a support beam that was blocking his view and saw his brother leaning up against the railing of the patio, watching the festivities, dressed in a dark gray t-shirt and jeans, a cup in his hand that Ned had a sneaking suspicion was Cherry Coke. Ted loved Cherry Coke.
The one thing Ned didn't see, however, was a law enforcement official that didn't have Cahill blood. Everybody there was a Clue hunter. He still wasn't sure if that was good or bad.
His courage in his hand, he stepped out into the blaring sunshine.
Ted noticed him immediately and grinned, leaving his post to greet his brother. "Hey, you decided to come!"
"Yeah, hi," Ned returned. "I almost didn't, but Sinead coming and all... Couldn't resist. Have you talked to her yet?"
"Yeah. She's in a great mood."
"You didn't happen to, uh... tell her anything about our little mano a mano, did you?"
Ted took a half step closer and lowered his voice, glancing around to make sure there was nobody within earshot. "If you're implying that I might have told her that you're The Racketeer, I didn't. There's no reason to drag her into it. You did come up in the conversation, but the only thing she was asking about was where you were and if you were coming. I told her I didn't know because you hadn't RSVP'd. That's it, I swear."
"Good." Ned looked his brother in the eye. "You been thinking about what you're going to say in your resignation speech?"
Ted's smile tightened slightly. "Is that a joke?"
Ned considered the question a moment. "Yeah, I suppose it was." He promptly walked off, eager to talk to Sinead.
Ned stepped up behind his sister stealthily and quickly put his hands over her eyes.
She stiffened. "Hello?" Her voice had acquired a light French accent in her last couple years abroad.
"Hello, this is the Joker," he replied in his perfect imitation of the Joker's voice. "I just escaped Batman's clutches and I need a journalist to help me write my memoirs. You didn't look like you were doing anything important, so I just thought I'd come over here and say hi. Hi."
Sinead had gasped right after he introduced himself as the Joker. There was only one man on the planet who could do the Joker's voice so well... and think it funny to sneak up on somebody and do an imitation of it. She whirled around and threw her arms around his neck. "Oh my gosh! Ned, it's so great to see you!"
He wrapped his arms around her, trying to keep a goofy grin from stretching across his face. "It's great to see you, too, Sinead. I've been missing you. How's Paris?"
"French, romantic." She pulled away a bit to look into her brother's face. "How are you doing?"
"Quite well, I'd say. And how are you?"
"I'll be much better once I get my article done for this month. Did Ted tell you?"
Ned frowned, suddenly on high alert. "I suppose that depends on what you're talking about."
"I need a super awesome topic for my column, but I haven't been able to find one. None of them are interesting enough. I wanted something with pizazz, you know? So I was talking to Ted, and he said that you were still working at that laboratory, and they're doing nanotechnology research to make nanodoctors, and that if I asked you really, really nicely that you might let me interview you concerning it. I just know my readers will love reading about a topic like nanotechnology. So... can I ask you some questions? Please?"
"Sure, I don't mind. What do you want to know?"
"Yay!" Sinead cheered, reaching into her shoulder bag to pull out an electronic recorder. "Let's go sit at a table, and I'll ask you some of the questions I prepared."
Amy sidled up to stand next to Ted, who had reclaimed his position against the railing. "How was Ned?"
"Warmer than I thought he would be, given the circumstances." Ted took a sip from his glass. "But my hopes weren't very high, either. I don't think he really cared to see me."
"Well, he came here to see Sinead, so I can't imagine he would want to stick around and talk to anybody but her for very long."
"Then why do I have the most indistinct feeling that he hates me?"
"He doesn't hate you, Ted, I'm sure of it. I think he's operating on the idea that just because you guys are on neutral territory right now doesn't mean that there's nothing between you. He can't take back what he did, even for a day, just as you can't."
Ted blinked and glanced at the Interpol agent. "And what did I do, exactly?"
Amy frowned, obviously not liking his tone. "I've been thinking a lot about what you told me, about how Ned mentioned you betrayed him in college. I'm not saying you did anything wrong, but what I am saying is... Well, if Ned feels betrayed over something you've said or done, whether you meant it to be hurtful or if you were even in the wrong, he feels betrayed over it. You can't tell someone how to feel, you know?"
Slowly, Ted nodded. "Yeah, I understand that. But what I don't understand is what I could have done that he would have taken the wrong way. He was usually very supportive of whatever it was I was doing. He never alluded to the fact that he might be hurt by something."
"He's got a lot of pride in him. If you were half as proud as he is, would you have admitted that you were torn up about something? Especially if you thought it was stupid and pointless?"
He offered Amy a wan smile. "Valid point. But it makes me feel bad about what we're about to do, since, basically put, it's all my fault he became a criminal in the first place."
"He chose his own path," she reassured quietly, resting her hand on his shoulder.
Ted stared sadly down into his Cherry Coke, unsure of how to reply.
A beep in their ears startled them both.
"Can you believe this?" came Ian's irritated voice through the earpieces they were wearing. "Ned just waltzed right over and stole Sinead from me! We were having a delightful conversation about designer Parisian fabrics, and he just made his way over here and took her! As if she wasn't already talking to somebody else! The nerve. Ted, that brother of yours is a real piece of art, did you know?"
Ted and Amy shared a glance. He reached up and turned on his earpiece. "I'm not quite sure how to respond to that, Ian."
"Then don't. I'm going to go find a waitress. I don't know who ordered these hors d'oeuvres, but they have no taste – the person and the hors d'oeuvres both. But fear not, I will have it straightened out momentarily."
From the other side of the deck, they watched the Briton walk back into the restaurant.
Ted turned to Amy. "Didn't you order those hors d'oeuvres?"
All Amy did was sigh and shake her head exasperatedly, but it was answer enough. And for the first time all morning, Ted smiled a genuine smile.
Sinead, beaming like a thousand shining stars, tucked her digital recorder back into her purse. "Thank you SO much, Ned! I owe you one. Seriously."
Ned smiled, glad to see his sister so happy. "It was no trouble, Sinead, really. I love science, and it did give me a reason to talk to you for pretty much the whole reunion. I think I should be thanking you... and nanotechnology, of course. Must give credit where credit is due."
Sinead laughed. "I suppose so." She glanced out at the water, watching the little waves disappear and reappear over the bay. "Ted said you got him a tie with a gecko printed on it."
Ned smiled, remembering the trip. He had picked it up when he went to Florida back in January. "Yeah, when I saw it I couldn't resist. I knew he'd probably never wear it; I got it as more of a gag gift."
Sinead grinned. "You always buy gag gifts."
"'Cause gag gifts are the best kind. He's just lucky I didn't get him a pair of underwear decorated with little poodles."
They shared a laugh.
"So, what have you been doing lately, other than submerging yourself in the exciting world of nanotechnology and buying gag gift ties for the President? Anything exciting?"
Ned slipped his hands into the pockets of his jeans. "No, not really. I've been doing a couple little things here and there. Some travel. Some TV-watching. Other than that, though, I've just been kinda takin' things as they come."
Sinead smiled. "I admire that about you, Ned. You just take things one day at a time, not burdening yourself with schedules and plans. Just going with the flow. It sounds like a nice way to live. I wish I was like that sometimes."
"It's not always rainbows and roses, but once you learn how to make it work for you, it's fine. Handy, even." Ned nodded as if to emphasize his point.
She nodded her agreement. "I know, but you know me. I'm a planner. I like to know exactly what I'm doing."
"That sounds like a pain," he replied with a grin.
"Sometimes it is," Sinead admitted with a giggle. "Especially when you don't have time to make a plan before jumping into something head first."
"Well, at least you know how to make a plan," Ned said. "I find that, if I try to make one, I end up either talking myself out of it before it's finished, or not sticking to it once it is. Kinda pathetic, really, if you want to get to the meat and potatoes of it."
"Yeah, but you're so naturally gifted with improvising, I don't know why you would ever want to waste time making a plan."
Ned hummed in thought. "Good point."
He glanced behind him, and ended up catching his brother's eyes. Ted was leaning in, talking to Hamilton about something, sneaking glances at Ned. When their eyes met, Ted smiled and waved in greeting. Ned nodded his head in return, feeling his stomach turn over. He had a bad feeling about whatever it was they were discussing. He turned back around to look at Sinead. "Speaking of improvising, I think it's about time I hit the road. But how about I email you once I get home? To catch up?"
Sinead smiled at him, but the look had changed. She sensed something was wrong, but was politely choosing to not ask about it. "Yeah, I'd like that a lot."
"Cool." He gave her a hug. "See you around."
He stepped away, and tried to make it look like he wasn't about to leave. He stopped a waiter and asked for directions to the bathroom, knowing the gesticulations would throw the dogs off his scent. Maneuvering closer to the restaurant entrance, he stopped near the buffet table and grabbed what looked like crab ragoon, although he couldn't be certain without tasting it – which he didn't plan on doing, because he hated seafood. He made his move for the door, as if he was simply headed for the bathroom, when-
"Hi, Ned! How's it going, man?"
The Racketeer turned to see Dan Cahill grinning at him.
"Oh, hey. Dan, right?"
"Yeah. Long time no see! I don't think I've actually talked to you since the hospital room in Switzerland after you got your head operated on."
Ned chuckled. "You make it sound like I was getting a brain scan."
"Well, you do seem kinda crazy, but you know what I meant."
Frowning, Ned replied, "I'm starting to wonder if I do."
Dan grinned wider, oblivious to the change in Ned's attitude. "I'm sure you do. You're pretty smart."
Ned blinked. "Yes." He glanced at the door. He needed to move. Dan was making him nervous. "I was just on my way to the bathroom, so how about we continue this in five? I've just spent almost two hours talking to Sinead and drinking Dr. Pepper, so as you can imagine..." He sidled closer to the door.
"Oh, yeah, I understand. This one time, I drank an entire two-liter of Mountain Dew and had a burping contest with myself. You know, where you try to make every burp better than the last one? And I was doing really good there for a while, but then I started running out of carbonated power, if you know what I mean, so I went into the kitchen-"
"Dan, seriously," Ned insisted, not wanted to cut him off for fear of looking suspicious but feeling he had no choice. "I gotta go."
Dan frowned. "Okay, go."
Ned studied the younger man's face for a few moments before nodding slowly. "Thank you."
As he turned and took a couple steps further away, he barely heard Dan whisper: "I think he's making a break for it."
Ned froze, one hand on the door handle. Slowly, steadily, he turned around to face Dan, who, upon meeting the Starling's gaze, looked like a deer in the headlights of a pickup truck. The atmosphere was frozen in that one moment for what seemed like a long, long time. Ned's gaze sharpened. "Well," he said, calmly, quietly, "I wasn't going to, but after that..."
Time shot into fast forward.
Dan raced ahead, thinking Ned would try to escape through the dining room since he was already at the door, but Ned expected that and dodged left. He moved forward with the agility of a rabbit, managing to twist his arm away as Madison made a grab for it. He slipped away to the right, where Amy and Reagan attempted to converge on him.
Feinting right, he tricked Reagan into launching herself into an expert tackle to try to take him down; but at the last second, he shot to the left and jumped onto one of the tables, where he promptly threw his crab ragoon at Amy – it bounced harmlessly off her forehead, but it caught her off guard long enough for him to hurriedly jump down off the other side of the table and run away as fast as he could.
Ted and Hamilton ran after him, weaving between tables and chairs and reunion attenders to catch up to the escapee.
When Ted saw Ned's goal, he picked up the pace and shot after his brother, panic giving him the superhuman ability to outrun Hamilton.
Ned took off down the pier, his eyes locked on the railing and the blue water beyond. A jump was all it would take to get away, because once he was in the bay he could go next to anywhere and nobody would be able to find him in time to stop him.
Only ten feet until he reached the perfect launch point.
He heard Ted's pounding footsteps reverberating through the wooden planks of the boardwalk, but it didn't matter. Ned had a head start. He wouldn't be able to catch up in time.
Five feet until he reached the jump zone.
Four feet.
Three...
Ned gasped.
Before he even understood what was happening, he was on the ground. His arm stung as it hit the unforgiving wood. His brother was on top of him, holding him in place. They were both panting hard from the exertion. Ned twisted just enough to be able to see the water through the slats in the boardwalk railing, but he couldn't get free. After a few more tries, he gave up, breathing hard.
Ted was still panting, but finally he caught his breath enough to say: "Ned Starling, you're under arrest."
