Title: Do You Even Fucking Know What You Mean To Me?
Disclaimer: Don't own 'em
Chapter: 3/?
Rating: N/C 17
Pairings: Sam/Dean, Wincest
Warnings: Language (Lots of Language), Smut, Violence, Wincest, Bottom!Dean, Attempted Suicide
Spoilers: Up Through Season 7
Summary: Started out as a short one shot, now it's being continued by persuasion...Certain circumstances cause Dean to make a stupid decision and Sam to clean up the mess in Dean's head, but there may be other consequences from the actions that were a consequence of Dean's decision...
After resting for a little while longer, Dean decided to go sit outside on the Impala and clear his head. That thing had really messed with him and he knew he still wasn't in a good head place, no matter how much he tired to convince Sammy he was fine. He was worried that the demon had been right, that Sammy was so much better off without him, that Sam secretly or subconsciously wanted him gone. Maybe Sammy didn't realize it yet, but in time he would, and he'd leave Dean well and truly alone this time. He took a deep breath and tried to relax himself, he'd deal with that when the time came, for now they needed to get back to normal and he needed to figure out a way for that to happen cause this isn't something Sam is going to be willing to let alone.
He really didn't want to be separated from Sammy again, but Dean knew the day Sam initiated it, he'd go, he'd let Sammy go. He did, after-all, when Sammy left for Stanford and a normal life. So he may have spent a few nights in front of Sam's dorm room, just watching, making sure Sam was alright, happy. As long as Sam was alright Dean would always stay out of the way.
Dean heaved a sigh and slid off the Impala to walk back to their motel room door where he was sure Sammy was waiting to ream him out and tell him how stupid he was and how reckless his decision had been. He however didn't expect what awaited on the other side of the recently painted, motel room 6 door.
Dean tried sneaking quietly back into the room in hopes that Sam may be asleep and he could put the yelling off, at least until morning. He wasn't so lucky though. As soon as the door was shut he was being slammed against it by a ragging Sammy. Fuck he was pissed off worse than Dean thought.
"Dammit Dean, What the HELL WERE YOU THINKING? WERE YOU EVEN THINKING? WHAT ABOUT ME DEAN, DID YOU EVEN THINK ABOUT ME?" He yelled, so invading Dean's space that Dean could feel Sam's hot breath against his cheek.
Ok so that made since now, Sam was hurt. Well Dean guesses he had every right to be, but doesn't he get Dean only does what he thinks is best for him?
"OF COURSE I DID! ALL I THOUGHT ABOUT WAS YOU! WHEN ARE YOU EVER GOING TO GET THAT? EVERYTHING I DO, I DO FOR YOU SAMMY! IT'S ONLY A MATTER OF TIME BEFORE YOU WAKE UP AND REALIZE YOU DON'T REALLY NEED ME, THAT I'M JUST THE ANNOYING OLDER BROTHER HOLDING YOU BACK! I JUST WANTED TO GIVE YOU AN EARLY OUT! I just wanted an easier out Sammy, I'm not going to handle it when...when it happens," he finished the last part quietly.
"Fuck Dean no. No." That had pushed Sam over the edge, Dean needed to stop talking like this and he needed to stop right fucking now, so Sam kissed him. Hard. Slamming him up against the door again, teeth clashing, hard.
Sam didn't even really think about what he was doing as he continued his assault on Dean grabbing his shirt and pulling him off he door and smashing him into Sam's own body. Sam continued kissing Dean
as he gently pushed on Dean's shoulders until they were both on their knees on the hard wood floor of their little hotel room. As they pulled apart for air Sam, pushed Dean until he was laying on his back, Sam hovering over top of him.
"Don't Dean, don't even think about this." Was the only thing Sam said as he pulled Dean's shirt and then his shirt off before kissing his way up Dean's neck and back to his swollen, now even fuller lips. Sam took the time to notice Dean was kissing back before he reached down and unbuttoned Dean's jeans and pulled them down as far as they would go with Dean's boots still on.
Same reached back up for another kiss, laying all his body weight on top of Dean. Dean's moan was pure encouragement so Sam broke the kiss to get up and take care of Dean's boots and the annoying jeans that were in the way. Upon removing the rest of Deans clothes, Sam hurriedly shucked his own jeans off before wickedly attacking Dean's mouth with his own again.
"I'm going to make love to you Dean, and then, then I'm going to Fuck you until you can't take it anymore. And I'm going to keep repeating that until you get just how important you are to me, hell to the whole world. Until you get how much I Love you Dean. We've been through enough, we've taken so many hits, so many losses but somehow, someway we're still together. So your just going to let me do this for you, I'm going to hold you down and make you fucking realize that everything I just said is true, so don't even try to argue with me Dean. Shhh." He said while placing a finger over Dean's kiss swollen lips when he started to talk.
"Fuck Dean I promise I'm going to make you feel so good, but first, first Dean it's going to hurt and it's going to hurt bad. You know why? Because I'm barley going to prep you, I want you to fucking feel us joining together, and I want you to remember the burn, the raw pleasure of this, of us Dean."
With that Sam grabbed his bag and dug around until he found what he was looking for. Once he did, he leaned back over and began to kiss his way up Dean's neck and across his jaw line until he was biting Dean's ear. As Dean moaned and arched into him, Sam popped the lid on the container and coated his fingers.
Sam stated another one of his dialogues while he slowly slid a finger into Dean. Too soon he was adding another and then he was coating himself and pushing into his brother.
Dean's stifled, pained moan was the only thing he remembers hearing as they finally took this step. Dean was in pain but he didn't care. Nothing compared to having Sam so close to him, he was inside of him for fuck's sake (literally). As Sammy leaned down and kept whispering 'Breathe Dean' into his ear, Dean's brain totally shut down and all he was capable of was little noises and repeating his brother's name over and over again. Dean never felt anything that compared to this before. He felt so connected to Sam it was ridiculous. Fuck. He really couldn't remember why they never went this far before.
Shit, Fuck if Sam had any idea that he could become more codependent on Dean he never had dreamed it would be this way. Upon seeing Dean under him, looking up at him, whispering his name over and over again, Sam knew he would never get enough of this.
"You've been my everything Dean. You practically raised me yourself. You played roles as not only my older brother, but as my mother, and father, and best friend, my everything Dean and don't you ever, fucking forget that."
With that the two hunters, brothers, lovers set forth a connection so strong that evil would forever be chasing them down, if not to recruit them, than to kill them.
