Chapter 3 – Privacy & A Party

'Why don't you have a computer on your desk?' Lisbon asked.

Jane looked to his feet that were in their now somewhat default position on his desk. 'Where would I put my feet if I had one?' he replied as if it was the most sensible response ever uttered.

She pressed on. 'I'm serious, Jane. Don't you need one?'

He tapped his index finger against his lips for a long moment before looking at her. 'Nope.'

She was growing increasingly exasperated. This was his third day with Lisbon and he was enjoying seeing what he could do to push her buttons. One word answers seemed to be another trigger he'd found to enjoy the colour rise to her cheeks. He'd gotten her to blush already merely an hour before and had decided that this was his favourite look on her so far. But controlled anger looked good on her too. He drew his attention to the wedding band on her finger again. She's married, remember that, he told himself once again as his mind began to wander to what her face may look like in the depths of passion. It was a problem though because all he had managed to prise out of her was that her husband's name was David. She'd kept her maiden name so he didn't even have a last name. She didn't even have a photo of him on her desk so he could get nothing about the man from that. After finally giving up his first name she gave him no information on what he did, whether he moved here with her or would be joining her soon. He had ascertained that she certainly lived alone at the moment. She worked long hours (either trying to make a good first impression or an inherent hardworker, deciding finally that the latter was more likely the truth) and didn't seem to make or receive any personal phone calls. Maybe he worked overseas, perhaps in the Forces. She didn't act like someone who was married, she seemed to be totally independent and was used to being on her own. But, if her husband merely worked for the Military, why all the secrecy on the matter? He got that she was an innately private person but she knew enough about him by now that he wasn't going to give up until he figured out the full story. Of course, he could probably wheedle the truth out of Captain Marshall but that would be cheating. He wanted to crack this case himself.

'What about when you need to file reports?'

Her voice brought him back to the topic in hand. Kelly laughed beside them, tapping her keyboard and hiding behind her screen.

Jane grinned at the young detective before turning back to Lisbon. 'File reports?' She really was priceless.

'Well, apparently you actually are a detective so you need to file reports like everyone else.'

He nodded. 'I am a detective but I'm certainly not like everyone else.'

'Oh, so, pray tell, how do you get away without doing any paperwork?'

'My paperwork gets done. Although I have told the Captain on many occasions that it's all an enormous waste of time. But bureaucrat that he is he won't listen to me on the matter. I just rarely do it myself.'

'So how does it get done? You have a genie tucked away somewhere that does it for you?'

A picture crossed Jane's mind of Lisbon in some type of Arabian belly dancing outfit. 'No genie. But if you're offering I'm sure I can get my hands on a costume for you.'

An immediate blush. Second one today he chalked up in his mind.

'I am certainly not offering.' She rolled her eyes and fixed her eyes back to a form on her desk, shaking her head, tired of getting nowhere with this conversation.


Jenkins' retirement party was held in Malone's pub, a cop hang out close to the police station. Lisbon watched from a table at the side as Jane held court at the bar, obviously in his element as he performed tricks with beer mats and coins for those attending. As he was enjoying his moment in the spotlight she studied him. He wore a black suit every day but not the same one as each day it looked neatly pressed. A black tie that sat loosened with the top two buttons of his white shirt undone completed the ensemble. She had joked with him about him looking like one of the Blues Brothers but he had replied, obvious that he had heard the same joke before, that he wore neither a hat nor sunglasses. She knew he was trying to figure her out but was surprised how few direct questions he asked her about her private life over the past day or so. He was blatantly nosy on the matter but after the first day where he had asked her questions incessantly about her husband to which she gave very little away he now seemed more content in trying to come to a conclusion himself and was holding back from discussing his assertions until he could do so with some confidence.

She took a sip of bourbon as he strolled over to her, a grin plastered on his face having caught her gawking. 'You see something you like, Lisbon?'

'I see someone who's about to make an idiot of themselves so yes.'

'Touche' He ordered a scotch and bourbon for her as he took a seat beside her. 'You trying to get me drunk now?' she smiled.

'The day I need to get a woman drunk to seduce her is the day I stop seducing woman.' He grinned, paused and smiled again. 'Besides which, I'm not trying to seduce you. I'm merely seeing if another drink will loosen you up a little more.'

'I can be plenty loose when I want.' She blushed immediately at the implication behind her words and made sure not to make eye contact with the man at her side.

He laughed and took a sip of his Scotch. 'Why haven't you asked me about it?' he said, looking straight ahead.

She turned to him, seeing an altogether different expression on his face than the one of amusement she had seen until now, one that showed off the lines across his forehead and his lips pursed in a straight line.

'Asked you about what?' she replied.

He turned to face her, draining his glass before picking up his replacement. 'My history. Normally within a day or two of meeting me people can't help bring it up. You haven't.'

She shrugged, grasping the sides of the glass in her hands. 'If you want to talk to me about it you can-'

'I don't.'

'Then...well I don't see the point in bringing it up. It's your private life. Unless it affects our working relationship-'

He understood the undertone in her response, her realisation that it would affect their working relationship one day. He replied a smile on his lips again, 'I see. So, it's a deal you're trying to make, is it? I don't delve into your personal life and you don't bring up mine?'

'I don't see it that way. But, yes, I prefer to keep my private life private. I'd like you to respect that.'

Jane nodded slowly, taking a long sip. 'I'm not very good at respecting other people's privacy.' No point giving her false hope.

He finished his drink as he was called over by one of the cops there, wanting him to show him how a magic trick was performed. Surely they realised by now that he never revealed his secrets. Both regarding his array of tricks and the depths of his own tortured soul. Suddenly a thought occurred to him. Maybe he could give up one of his lesser secrets tonight, to show that she could trust him, at least a little. He turned back to Lisbon who eyed him with a look of suspicion. He spoke softly, his eyes fixed on hers. 'I pay Kelly to write up my reports for me. She pays for her grandmother's keep in a nursing home so needs the extra income.'

Lisbon's lips parted in surprise and she nodded in understanding. Neither of them needed to articulate that divulging this secret this would stay between them.


As the party died down Jane reached for his jacket. Only the stragglers were left now, Lisbon having left after an hour to his teasing about being a goody two shoes that was afraid of being late for the teacher the next morning. She told him to 'bite me' to which he said it was the best offer he'd had all night. After rolling her eyes, rapidly moving up the pecking order in the looks he admired on her, she had shook Jenkins' hand and left, moving with cat like reflexes to stop the old man from pulling her into a bear hug.

Jane tapped Jenkins on the shoulder as he lay with his head on the bar. 'How about I get us a cab, my old friend' Jane smiled.

'It's okay, I got it' a woman said behind them. Jenkins' wife Harriet was standing with her arms crossed over her chest, shaking her head at Jane. He grinned at her, embracing her and kissed her on the cheek. 'I tried to get him to stop drinking an hour ago, I promise' he laughed as the two of them looked at the man whose face sat in a pool of stale beer.

She sighed loudly but smiled at the blond man who she had begrudgingly come to admire and call a friend. 'Help me to the car with him.'

Jane and a few others finally managed to get him into the car and strapped him into the passenger side. 'I'm sorry' Jane said again to his wife, more sincerity in his tone now. 'You need me to come with you to make sure you get him inside the house?'

She shook her head. 'He'll be fine. I'll fry up some bacon and let the smell waft out to him. He's like a bloodhound once he gets a sniff.'

Jane grinned and hugged her again. 'I'll call him at the weekend, see how he's doing with the whole retirement thing.'

'He'd appreciate that, Patrick. As much as he tells me you're a selfish son of a bitch most of the time he thinks of you as the son he never had.'

'Well, having four daughters would make anyone yearn for one' Jane smiled, his face impassive despite being touched by her words.

She frowned. 'You going to be okay? I hear you have a lady partner to replace him.'

Jane grinned. 'Well, no offence but she's a damn sight better to look at first thing in the morning than him.' A snore from Jenkins solidified his point.

'You like her?'

Jane shrugged. 'Don't know her well enough to decide yet.'

Harriet Jenkins nodded, a knowing smile gracing her lips. 'I see. Not what Ken said.'

Jane recovered quickly. 'Well, you realise he talks nonsense most of the time.'


As he knocked on the roof of the car as it left he turned around and found himself staring at an attractive redhead who smiled seductively at him. He grinned as she held up a set of keys. 'Hey there, thought you might need a lift home?'

'Hey Tara. Somehow I knew you'd show up tonight.'