Chap 2- There s no real evidence of us We talk about a lot of things. And this is what I remember.
It s like we were just getting know each other. Friend-to-be, maybe.
About yourself. About myself. Some random things about life. Our past love lives. My favorite is how you talk about how you fell in love with your ex. There s are things that I noticed about you or rather what I remember most about our conversation. First, you re too simple and thrifty. Second, you re mature in mind, like you had an old soul in your body. That s why I like calling you Kuya. Third, you are so close with your mom. Fourth, you respect women. Five, you don t believe in God. In short, you re an atheist. Six, at this moment while I m chatting with you for the first time, I still thought that you re still single. Seven, your mom and dad are separated. Eight, you don t get along much with your siblings. Ninth, you re younger than me by 13 days, birthday July 6. Tenth, you re a 4th year college student. Eleventh, you gave up in happy endings. Twelfth, you don t like to talk with stupid people much. Thirteenth, you drink coffee three times a day. I was worried about that. Fourteenth, your schedule for your formal classes was Tuesday and Friday. Fifteenth, you aren t afraid of death. Sixteenth, you don t like pesky kids because they could get on your nerves. Seventeenth, you don t like being in a relationship because they re pain in the ass. Eighteenth, you had a dream to continue studying after you graduate like acquiring an Master s Degree. It s as if you wanted to use your life to acquire knowledge. Nineteenth, you re kindly talking to me, never wanting to offend me. I wonder if all of what you re saying was true. Twentieth, you once ask me out in order for us to meet but the timing was off. It didn t happen. Twenty-first, you like doing things on your own without relying on anyone. Twenty- second, I call you by your alternative name Yohan. Your first name is the same as my ex-boyfriend. It s as if I m talking to my ex. Twenty-third, I once help you in coming up a topic for your thesis. Twenty-forth, I once talk to you in a tsundere tone because I was worried too much for you. Twenty-fifth, you said never did smoke before. Twenty-sixth, you sometimes had mood swings too.
That s what I knew about him for the past two weeks.
I thought we became closer but that s just what I thought. You don t feel the same way.
But It all came fast. I just wish this would last. This getting fun already. I almost forgot I had an exam which is kind of bad. I m sleeping later than my usual sleep just to talk to Ryui. I use to sleep late before with my ex-boyfriend s late night call or when I m staying up surfing online.
I became interested in you.
I m having so much fun that I forgot all about my worries about my upcoming exam. I m having so much fun that I forgot what are my main priorities and that s a bad thing. You know how too much could be addicting and you became a poison to me without me realizing it. I hate myself for getting tainted by your maturity and charm.
I did get attached to you but you didn t get attached with me. I like you already. What should I do?
We didn t have a label. I didn t know what we were ever since we talk.
We are neither strangers nor friends. There s no such thing as in between and half.
I don t have to bother what we are because we don t talk anymore. I don t care anymore because you also don t care about me. I have no choice anymore but to let go of you who didn t exert effort to make me stay or chase me. I know you will not do those actions, you had a girlfriend, someone more precious than me.