Sorry I took so long. I just couldn't satisfy myself with this chapter but I thought I should just post it before I change it again. And thanks for reading and reviewing and all that. I really appreciate it.
Disclaimer: Don't own bleach.
It was winter in Soul Society though, there wasn't snow in Seireitei, there never was. It was nearing Sora's first birthday which was a week away and she had surely grown before everyone's eyes. It was a slow day for all the squads but there was always still work to do. Since squad 5 had someone handling the work, squad 10 was no longer responsible for it, though the transition did take time.
"Matsumoto, I have some files that need to be sent to squad 5. Please deliver them." Hitsugaya didn't look up from his work but already knew she was pouting.
"But taicho, it's so cold!"
"It's not that cold and it's not like it snows in Seireitei." Hitsugaya said blankly as he continued with his work in his perfect handwriting.
"Hmph, easy for you to say." Matsumoto said as she crossed her arms and stuck out her bottom lip.
Hitsugaya stood up and dressed his daughter in a thick white cloak that complemented their eyes, white mittens, and red rubber boots over her white and pink polka dot socks.
"Matsumoto, continue the rest of the paperwork."
"Hai. Uh taicho, what do you have planned for today?"
"Nothing." Hitsugaya responded icily while wrapping a red scarf around his neck. It was the same one he wrapped around Karin's neck just a few years ago, the same one in his dream and the same one branded into his memories.
"Oh." Matsumoto put on a sad demeanor and quietly walked to the desk.
Hitsugaya lifted the hood of Sora's cloak onto her head and stepped outside. The sun was shining vibrantly, high in the sky but the air was chilly and Sora's face had a hint of red from the cold. He walked to the 5th squad office with the stack of papers in one hand and Sora in the other.
"Tou-sa, tofu." Sora looked at her father with a little smile.
"You want tofu for lunch?" His breath caused mist to appear from his mouth. Sora laughed and tried to grasp the amusing scientific phenomenon while nodding.
"We'll get lunch after I drop this off to Hinamori."
"Momo."
"Yes, Momo." Hitsugaya looked into his daughter's eyes whose were identical to his own except that Sora smiled with eyes. He knew her eyes appeared brighter than his and probably looked much friendlier.
Hitsugaya always worried about his icy personality rubbing off onto his daughter but if she had a similar mind set as her father, it would be easy to get her to agree with whatever he said, especially when she gets older right? Considering that Sora is now barely a year old, she was quite cheerful and was usually in a good mood, though, he had to watch what he said. She was talking more and more everyday and repeated most of the things she heard, including bad words.
Once, while Matsumoto and Hisagi were babysitting Sora, Matsumoto and Hisagi got into an argument about some useless matter.
"Damn it Hisagi! I'm right and you're just an asshole!"
"Ass-ole."
Matsumoto and Hisagi both gasped when they heard the voice of a child just learning how to talk.
"No Sora, say Hisagi."
"Ee-sa-ee ass-ole."
"Thanks Rangiku, you just made it worst." Hisagi snapped.
Hitsugaya returned from dropping files off to the sotaicho and Matsumoto received the lecture of her life not to mention the fact that her ears were ringing from all his yelling. He even stated that even though the statement may be true, it wasn't appropriate for his daughter, his infant daughter, to say. Hitsugaya knew it wasn't true but Hisagi was a part of it too so he had to get him for something. He kicked them out that night and ordered Matsumoto to clean the bathrooms the next morning.
Hitsugaya knocked on the 5th squad's office door and someone voiced him to come in.
"Hitsugaya-kun, Sora-chan." Hinamori stood up from her desk and took Sora off of Hitsugaya's hands.
"How many times must I say this, its Hitsugaya taicho."
Hinamori giggled as she walked away while still holding Sora.
"She's grown since I last saw her." Hinamori held the child out at arms length to examine her.
"Is she walking yet?"
"She can definitely stand but her walking is still a little wobbly, though, she is still capable of it."
"Ooh really?" Hinamori put Sora on the ground to watch her walk but Sora placed her own butt on the ground instead. Her hood slid off when she made contact with the floor and freed her growing raven black hair.
"Come on Sora-chan, can you walk for me?" Hinamori lifted Sora to her feet but Sora sat back down once again. Hitsugaya smirked as she continually failed to get Sora to walk.
He walked over to them and took Sora's hands and lifted her to her feet, then he slowly stepped back causing Sora to walk forward. After a few steps, he let her hands go and she continued to walk toward him until she reached his leg and grasped his hakama.
"Wow, Sora-chan, good job!" Hinamori knelt down in front of Sora and held her hand out. Sora stared at it for a few seconds before placing her own hand in it.
"Momo." Sora said out loud.
"Your name is the only one she can pronounce properly." Hitsugaya stated as he handed a stack of files to her then picked Sora up. Hinamori smiled.
"We're going to get lunch now. Ja ne Hinamori." Hitsugaya slid the door open.
"Wait, Hitsugaya-kun." Hinamori handed him a blue gift bag.
"Happy birthday. It's actually from both Matsumoto-san and me." Hinamori smiled cheerfully, she never failed to give him a gift on his birthday but this year, he wasn't up to celebrating it.
"Arigatou, Hinamori." He attempted a smile but it faded quickly.
"Say bye Sora." Hitsugaya held her wrist and moved her hand in a waving motion.
"Bye Momo."
"Ja ne Sora-chan, Hitsugaya-kun." Hinamori waved as they walked away from her office.
Hinamori had been overwhelmed with work since her division was still lacking a captain. It took awhile for her to come around but she finally accepted the reality that Aizen was a traitor and she had apologized countless times to her childhood friend for attacking him and accusing him of a fake murder. It had been five years since the war ended which gave Hinamori more than enough time to move on, time to apologize, and time for everyone to forgive and forget.
Hitsugaya arrived at a noodle house where he was properly greeted as "Hitsugaya taicho" and was seated. The waiter even brought out a high chair for Sora, much to Hitsugaya's surprise.
"Do you still want tofu?"
Sora nodded happily. He always wondered how he got so lucky to have such an amazing daughter.
Hitsugaya ordered miso soup with tofu and a side order of rice for Sora and ordered himself a small bowl of shoyu ramen. When the food arrived, Hitsugaya put a little bit of miso soup on the scoop of rice since it would be easier to feed a baby soup that way and took out a few cubes of tofu. He put a little bit of rice and a little piece of tofu on every spoon he fed Sora. Tofu was one of her favorites and since she could say the word, she asked for it frequently. Every time he fed her a spoonful, he took a bite out of his own food. Sora giggled as she watched her father slurp up the noodles.
After their meal, Hitsugaya opened the gift he received from Momo. It was a little photo album. It started with photos of Karin and him self. Karin at least half smiled in most of the pictures where as he looked annoyed or showed as much as a smirk for a smile. Looking at the photos made him long for Karin even more and made his stomach turn but he couldn't stop flipping through the pages. There were photos of their wedding, the old fashioned wedding that they held in Soul Society and the traditional wedding they held in the human world. Then there were the pictures of Karin while she was with an unborn Sora. These were the last months he had spent with her and though they were married, she lived in their house alone a lot of the time. She didn't mind and she understood the duties her husband had to fulfill but he always came to be with her on the weekends. Inoue spent a lot of time with Karin during her pregnancy since Karin, for some reason, couldn't get enough of Inoue's unusual recipes.
Their house remains in the living world, unoccupied and still waiting for the return of its owners. Hitsugaya never went back to the house after Sora was born. He didn't want to admit any reason to anyone why he wouldn't return but deep down within himself, he knew. He didn't think he could deal with all the memories. Everything would be too familiar, the colors, the smells, and Karin's belongings were still there. Ichigo and Yuzu went to the house every once in awhile to check on it but that always resulted in a crying fit for Yuzu, and Ichigo hugging and comforting her all the while.
He avoided going to the human world as much as possible visiting the Kurosaki's only once in the past year. Ichigo visited Soul Society quite often, especially to see Rukia so he was the only family Sora was familiar with. Hitsugaya felt at fault for keeping Sora from her family and he knew he was being selfish and would never admit to being a coward but that's exactly the reason why he didn't go back. He didn't think his heart would be able to take it. He couldn't, he wouldn't breakdown for the sake of his job as captain of the 10th squad and for the sake of his daughter.
After the birth of Sora, Karin didn't appear in any photos; it was now just Hitsugaya and Sora. There were pictures that he wasn't aware was taken, most of which were taken while he was asleep or when someone was baby sitting. The pictures were put in order as Sora grew. He had forgotten how little she used to be. Sora was growing more beautiful and looking more like her mother every day.
The last page was a photo of the sky taken from their spot on the side of the road. That was their meeting spot. It was where they shared their thoughts with each other, secrets, and their past. That faithful day when Karin kicked her ball a little too hard, it was destiny for them to meet and this, now, was their fate. He just hoped that fate would be on his side in the near future in finding Karin.
After meeting Hitsugaya at the spot and hearing him out about the sky and memories, Karin went there nearly every day even if he wasn't there. Three years had passed until he came back and Karin was already there, leaning on the railing and watching the sunset. They both barely grew a few inches but Karin's hair had gotten much longer.
Love eventually flourished when they met every day for almost three months. Even though they were young, their love only grew stronger. He got used to Karin's tough tom boy attitude and she got used to his nonchalance and wariness.
It took Hitsugaya a while to open up to her but it was the same with Karin. They understood each other and their need to share their feelings. They both kept everything to themselves and they both always wanted to deal with everything themselves. Though they had different problems, they were more alike than anyone knew at the time. Everything linked together, Ichigo, shinigami, Hinamori, Aizen, hollow, arrancar, the winter war, Karakura town, and Karin's father's true identity. Yes, fate was a strange thing and they both realized it when they were able to connect everything, connect their lives. There were no secrets from Karin. He didn't have to worry about erasing her memory, which wouldn't work on her anyways, she knew what shinigami and hollows were and she was even able to fight them herself as long as they weren't too big. After recollecting all the memories that had to do with the picture, he slightly chuckled to himself. Only good memories were made at that railing.
Hitsugaya spent the day with his daughter. He knew Matsumoto wouldn't mind considering that she was upset when he said he wasn't doing anything for that day, for his birthday. He took Sora to the outskirts of Rukongai, the only place it snowed in Soul Society unless he made it snow on purpose.
He placed Sora on the ground where snow was extremely shallow and let her walk around.
"Tou-sa, so!"
"You mean snow?"
"So." She repeated.
He didn't even know how she figured out it was snow, it turns out she may be just as brilliant as he had been.
Sora looked up at him as he knelt down to her and held out a little snow ball. She stared at the ball for a little bit until she took it into her own hands. It fell apart but some snow still remained in her hands which she used to throw at her father.
"Hey, don't throw it at me."
Sora giggled then walked wobbly to a pile of snow where she threw it in the air as if it were confetti. Hitsugaya sat on the ground and watched her as she innocently played with the snow. He stared at her until he saw past her. He was starting to daydream. He saw Karin's face and he could feel her, smell her, and hold her. He was pulled out of it when he heard coughing.
"Sora, don't eat the snow."
Sora had bits of ice around her mouth. She looked at her daddy, eyes wide. She knew she was getting in trouble and when ever she did, she froze. She didn't cry but sometimes she would get scared. She didn't like getting scolded so it usually took one warning for her to stop what ever it was she was doing.
After spending a few more minutes in the snow, Hitsugaya thought it was time to leave before Sora got frostbite. He held on to her tightly yet gently as he shunpoed through all the districts of Southern Rukongai and back to Seireitei. Sora was never afraid but was amused of the quick movements. She always instinctively closed her eyes but not of fear, but because of the wind. As soon as Hitsugaya stopped at the Red Hollow gate, the southern gate, Sora giggled, and as the gate opened she pointed into the Seireitei and yelled "go!"
"Arigatou Higonyudou."
"Anytime Hitsugaya taicho."
As soon as he walked through the gate he shunpoed toward his office. He appeared in front of the building, an exhilarated Sora wriggling around in his arms.
"Up." Sora pointed towards the roof and Hitsugaya smirked.
"When we get home ok." He rubbed his finger on her cheek as she gazed at him. She put her head down on his shoulder and held onto his haori as he walked into the office to find Matsumoto sleeping on the couch. There was no work on the desk which meant she had finished it but he was surprised that she wasn't out with Kira or Hisagi. Seeing as there was nothing to do, he went home.
XXXXX
Karin sat on the roof watching the sun set when she thought she saw something in the distance. Someone appeared for less than half a second but was gone again. Her pupils enlarged and her eyes glazed over as a memory crept into her mind.
She was moving really fast, she wasn't moving on her own accord but she wasn't in a vehicle either. The wind whipped through her hair and there was hair in her face. Not her hair but someone else's. It was much shorter and much lighter in color. It all looked sort of like a blur but it was somehow familiar.
She felt her self returning to reality, wanting to know who was with her but the vision faded.
"What was that?" She said to herself out loud. Karin closed her eyes and brought her fingers to her temples and rubbed them, trying to recall what she just saw.
"Karin, are you ok?"
"Uh yeah, I'm fine."
"You were in a sort of daze or something. I kept saying your name and waving my hand in front of your face but you didn't respond. It was starting to make me nervous."
"Sorry, it was weird. I thought I saw something out there" – points toward the faraway field – "and then I saw something…in my mind. I don't know how to explain it. It seemed familiar but I can't recall it ever happening before."
"What did you see?"
"I was on someone's back while they were moving, running I think, but really fast."
Kenji gave Karin a puzzled looked while trying to contemplate what she saw. "Do you know whose back you were on?"
"It was someone with really light hair, a silvery white but I'm not sure if I know who it was. It doesn't ring a bell."
"Hmm strange."
They both sat in silence for a moment until Kenji changed the subject.
"So what would you like for dinner? I'll cook tonight."
"Tofu. I don't know why but I really want tofu."
"Tofu it is. You should come in soon it's getting kind of cold out here."
"It's fine, I actually kind of like it."
Kenji jumped off the roof and landed lightly on his feet. He and Karin were able to do that but it never occurred to him that not everyone can jump off a roof and land nicely without so much as a thud.
Karin thought more about what she saw or remembered. It somehow meant a lot to her and she didn't know why but she wouldn't let herself forget it.
Karin was happy living with Kenji in his little house in Rukongai but she felt like a part of her was missing. She didn't know what it was and she knew she would figure it out. She was frustrated with the vision and sometimes her dreams gave her clues to her human life but she wasn't able to relate them. She just thought they were dreams. But after her little apparition, she knew there was something that she didn't know. If she could just have a bigger clue. As far as she knew she was just Hitsugaya Karin, a girl with long black hair and dark blue eyes and had reiatsu. She wore a ring that had no significance to her and her family was Hasegawa Kenji. She knew she was somewhat different yet the same as many other people in Soul Society. She didn't know anyone besides Kenji and no one knew who she was as far as she knew. It was just her and her very little family.
The sun was starting to set casting bright light out of the horizon. Karin held her hand to her forehead as she thought a little longer about everything, or everything she was aware of, then went inside to join Kenji for dinner.
XXXXX
Another day had gone by. Hitsugaya now a year older and in just a week, Sora would reach that one year mark too. Time ticked away with no regards to anyone's thoughts. Time was unstoppable, unavoidable, and irreplaceable. Watching Sora grow proved that it had taken that much longer to find Karin, that much longer that Sora had been motherless, and that much longer that Toushirou had been away from her.
Hitsugaya took his daughter to sit on the roof as he had promised earlier. The sun was already completely down and stars were twinkling high in the sky.
"Oshee." Sora pointed up at the sky. (She's trying to say hoshi [star] if anyone is wondering)
Hitsugaya cradled her gently and hummed a lullaby. After a few yawns and fighting her heavy eyelids, Sora was fast asleep. Hitsugaya felt to make sure her bracelet was intact to ensure a sound peaceful sleep for Sora.
"Goodnight my Sora."
Hitsugaya let the cold breeze blow through his messy white locks as he closed his eyes and took a deep breath. The cold was soothing and almost satisfying to the winter-souled shinigami. It was easier to take in the cold weather with his haori and scarf off. He always hoped his hands wouldn't be too cold for Sora but the cold never really seemed to bother her, though, it was always better to take precautions. He would never be able to forgive himself if he'd hurt Sora by his own hand in any way.
Hitsugaya went back into his home, took Sora's cloak off and placed her on his futon. He sat on his window sill, afraid to go to sleep. He was afraid of his memories, afraid to face them, afraid of the hurt that it would bring when he woke up. He felt like such a coward letting something as little as sleep to scare him. He thought about what his feelings were; whether if he was depressed or just plain pathetic. He couldn't help but feel sorry for himself. He only let these emotions leak out when no one was around to see him like this.
He sat on the sill until the clock read three o' clock. It was 3 A.M. and he was still awake. At that moment, he hoped that Karin was at least in a warm bed.
This chapter was lame. Hope it wasn't too boring for everyone. Oh and happy New Year! Where did all the time go? And school is starting soon too...dread.
