Disclaimer: I do not own Halo 2 and I never will.

To honor 2007 somemore...even though I still say 2006 went by too quick and I miss it. Here is Halo 2 Protectors Valentines. It feels like just yesturday I made H2P's very first chapter back in Summer 06. It also feels like just yesturday it was 06 Valentines day.

It was Valentines day...today was going to be one of those days. The Halo 2 Protectors could already tell. Brown and Crimson were secretly spying on Teal and Lovespell. Teal had gotten alot better since he no longer hated to be around girls. Infact Brown and Crimson were kinda scared by the way Teal was acting around Lovespell. "Man...Teal is always with Lovespell and the Koolgals of the late! When we need him he's always busy!" Crimson said. "I would hate to admit it but I liked him better sexist!" Brown said. "Hey guys! It's already Valentines day again! It feels like just yesturday!" Sage said entering the party. "Hey Sage look on your friends list and tell me what you see!" Crimson ordered. "Okay...I see names, levels and alot of pretty colors!" Sage said stupidly. "No! Not that I mean look who Teal is with!" Crimson said. "Teal is with the Lovespell again! Damn I've been thinking of hooking up with Supermodel for soo long!" Sage admited. "WTF man? I thought you had a girl?" Crimson asked. "No...I never had a girlfriend before in my life. You know I'm the stupid one of the group that's what Chaos Ruler probably had in mind". Sage said breaking the 4th wall. (I.E. addressing the the creators or the audience).

"Haha! Sage you're so funny. I bet you get kicked in the crotch alot by all the gothic girls you flirt with!" Brown said. "Hey why does everyone always choose me to make fun of?" Sage asked. Nobody answered or spoke for a few seconds. "Hey guys I wonder what that fag Killer is up to right now. He about we go get him and kick his ass?" Crimson suggested. "Or we could just get t4g to go see him on Valentines day!" Brown said starting to crack up. "Yeah we wouldn't want no grown man giving an 11 year old girl surgery to give her some tits and curves now would we?" Crimson asked. "Don't even joke like that Crimson. Killer is a sick pervert that deserves to be banned from xbox live also amoung other things he does...MODDING!" Brown reminded.

Meanwhile Killer was sitting in a Prophet throne relaxing. Even though Halo characters never run out of energy cause it's a game and all. Crimson and the other Halo 2 Protectors walked up to him. "Ahhh! Halo 2 Protectors! What's today anyway?" Killer asked. "Why it's Valentines day!" Sage said. "VALENTINES DAY! I HATE VALENTINES DAY! IT'S TOO MUSHY! LIKE YOU GUYS WILL BE FOR BREAKING IN HERE!" Killer said and began to fire gauss turret sonic waves from his hands. "Whoa, whoa, whoa big man! You got to leave your stuff in safer places!" Sage said and raised Killer's flame shotgun up into the air. "F- no! You wouldn't!" Killer said. "I would...for a cheater like you no mercy is needed!" Sage said and fired away. Killer jumped out of the Prophet throne and ran for the door but was over powered by the flame shells from the shotgun. The buckshot pierced right through Killer's armor and his dead body fell to the floor on fire. "This faggot is getting annoying! Sage keep shooting him...and teabag him too!" Crimson ordered. Sage walked over and kept shooting Killer's dead body. Killer quit the game and escaped again. "Oh come on! We need Ninja to get him for us!" Crimson said. "Otherwise he will keep returning to haunt us!" Brown added. Teal joined the game. "Hey guys what's happening? And what map is this?" Teal asked. "It was Killer's map. And we see you're getting really close to Lovespell." Crimson said. "Not really we're just friends. Even if I wish she would think more of me." Teal said. "Well Killer escaped cause you, Trar and Ninja weren't here." Crimson added. "Oh I got an inv! Lovespell says she 'luvs' me! That's great Crimson! I'll talk to you guys later!" Teal said and left. "Well atleast he's happy and not calling us dumbasses today." Brown said. "Yeah I guess...now what do we do?" Sage asked. The map was on fire in the background and then they noticed and quit the game.