A Lesson in Leaving
by Castlefan6
Authors Note: Gina Cowell Castle Cowell played a huge role in the lives of Caskett, but who is she, what do we know about her, was she really wicked, or just not on the same page with Rick for marriage? We'll add our take on a character that was central to our couple. TOTALLY AU. NOTE: AU not canon If you don't know the difference, then don't comment about what I left out of the story you saw on TV.
I don't own Castle, I use the characters for amusement purposes only
Chapter 5
Previously
"Rick, I have to get back to my normal life, and Sweetie as much as I appreciate all the help, let's start phasing them out as I regain my strength, OK?"
"I know Gina, I just want you back to your full strength, this is all my fault," as a tear comes to his eye, "You warned me how tough this could be, but did I listen, No, that would never happen to us, but I know the last 30 months have not been the type of marriage you wanted, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry," as he lays his head in her lap and weeps.
"Rick, you had no way of knowing, hey, we can say we tried, right, I mean we both tried, and we're still together right, I still love you no matter what"
Castle's Loft
One Month Later
Gina finally was allowed to resume her full schedule and spent almost the entire days at Black Pawn getting caught up with work that had been diverted to the other two editors. She was anxious to see what if anything new some of her recruits had brought to the table, although she had been connected, for the past 30 months work had been a secondary priority to being a mother, well trying to be a mother, and a wife to Rick.
She had confirmed just how sweet Rick was, he would do just about anything to make her happy, no matter the cost. Since the last stay in the hospital, flowers showed up for no reason, or for made up National Something Days, that would give him the right to baby her. She loved it, but she also hated it at the same time since each incident reminded her that she had failed to give Rick the one thing he had always wanted, a child. The more attention she received, the deeper the hurt, till one day she cracked.
"God Damn it Rick, stop acting like everything is OK between us, we both know I failed you, do you see a child, do you? Well I sure as hell don't which means I failed to give you the one thing you wanted in life."
"Gina, Baby, calm down. I only want to show you how much I love you, and that it's OK, there are other ways to have kids, we can adopt. In fact, I started the paperwork for a private adoption from a distant relative of Mother's, so it would still be family."
"You did what? WHY the hell would you do that without us talking, what makes you think I want to be God Damn mother to someone else's problem, there has to be something wrong or they wouldn't be giving them up."
Gina is angry, hurt, and now Rick is hurt and angry, trying to do something he thought would make his marriage stronger, seemed to have the opposite effect. In the following weeks, she became more distant, speaking to him at work when he was in the office, but a wall of silence at home till finally it erupted.
Castle's Loft
5 Months Later
Rick had been patient, or at least he thought he had been, but his marriage was in serious trouble, Gina was not happy and the life they led at home, they may as well have been strangers. The first private adoption had fell through, but there was a beautiful little cousin, 3 or 4th removed, who had just been born, Alexis was her name and Rick was still going through with the adoption process, hoping Gina would come around.
She had reluctantly agreed to marriage counseling, but it seemed the only time she felt alive was at work, which she poured herself into 16 to 18 hours a day. The Counselor had advised them both, that unless they were working for a common goal, their marriage would be short lived. Once again, Rick tried, making arrangements for a surprise birthday trip to Paris, and then snow skiing in the Alps, when he presented her Birthday present, she simply said,
"Cancel the trip Rick, in fact we have an appointment with the counselor and my attorney next Tuesday, I am filing for divorce."
"What do you mean, Gina, We can work this out, just like we always do, come on now, you don't want this, I know I sure as hell don't"
"Don't you Rick? Really? Why would you bring an infant into our home without discussing it with me, before finding out would I be OK with it, who's going to feed, clothe and diaper it Rick? I would gladly have stayed home and taken a hiatus from my career for our child, but you just decide that hey, I want a kid, I'm gonna get one.
Well it doesn't work like that, every time I would hear that baby cry, it would remind me I am a failure as a woman and a wife. I can't take that Rick, we are drifting apart now, that would just put a barrier I can't get over, I'm sorry but you will be better off without me in your life."
"Gina, you don't mean that, and I never expected you to take care of Alexis, I was going to hire a full-time nurse and nanny, you know how many women get pregnant after adopting?" his face falls as he just realizes what he had said, "Gina you know I didn't mean anything by that, and you certainly haven't failed me as a wife, can't we rewind the clock to our first two years together? Hell no one was better together than us, we can recapture that spark, I know we can."
"Rick, I know you would never hurt me deliberately, but the hurt is still there, I had my tubes tied because it was a decision WE made together after trying for 2 ½ years, and 5 miscarriages, this decision you made all on your own, I never had a say in it, and from the way you are talking never would. You already have her named, Nanny's hired, hell Rick, what do you need me for?"
"I need you here as my wife, I love you Gina, and I know you love me, this can't be the end of us, it can't be"
"I love you Rick, I'll always love you, but I'm not what you need, definitely not what a newborn needs as a mother, so let's agree to go our separate ways. If we truly were meant to be together, we will find our way back, but now, I need to be free, to have my space and try to heal. You have smothered me Rick, I know you meant well, but I can't go on like this, I'm sorry so very sorry I failed you, as a wife and as a mother to your child.
New York Municipal Court
Family Court and Domestic Relations
4 Months Later
Rick hasn't seen Gina since she moved out of the Loft, she skipped the suggested counseling sessions, sending her attorney in her place to offer excuses, so today was the day. Today was the day he would stop being a husband, but also legally become a father. The marriage disillusionment was almost mechanical, Rick and Gina had agreed on everything through their respective attorneys and all that was left was for the court to bless the agreement.
The judge, a man nearing 60 peered over his glasses first at Gina, then at Rick and asked,
"Does this marriage have even one ounce of hope for its continuation, answer Yay, if you feel this marriage has gone through all of the steps, and there is no hope for it's continuation as a legal sanctity, answer Ney," he pauses as Rick waits for Gina who replied with a firm but sad voice Ney, to which Rick also replied Ney.
As the judge reviewed the answers, he paused, "One last opportunity to change your mind, No then let the record show that both parties have agreed to the terms outlined in the documents filed with this court, and I hereby decree the marriage, agreements, contracts between Richard Rogers, AKA Richard Castle, and Gina Cowell Castle, to be null and void." The gavel made the loud noise as his honor slams it down, a tear falls from Gina's eye, but she refused to look at Rick, knowing if she did all she would want to do would be to run to him and tell him how much she still loved him. He was better off, he would see it someday.
Rick and his attorney make a hasty exit to the Family Court two floors up, where their case is just being called, and 20 minutes later, Rick Castle has legally adopted the baby Alexis who has been in his care for the last 3 months, with Social Services monitoring and reporting on the progress, the baby is now and forever to be know as Alexis Castle, daughter of Richard Castle.
It was both a day of tremendous joy and sadness, Rick was a Dad, but was also single. The only contact he would have with Gina now was through his work at Black Pawn, and the alimony checks for the amount they had agreed upon.
Rick silently prayed his now ex wife would find happiness, he knew now that he couldn't provide it to her no matter what he did. He lifted a glass to toast being a Dad, and shed a tear for his love that he lost along the way, only time would tell if he made a decision he would regret, or if the cost of fatherhood was more than he had been willing to pay,
On the other side of town Gina is sitting on her sofa, turning the page on the album of pictures of her and Rick in the good old days, as they progress to her first surgery and then they suddenly stopped. Gina's tears filled the empty pages for the love she lost, and the little souls who were buried in the family plot, in all 2 boys and 2 girls had been lost, along with her heart. It seemed that Kyra wasn't the only one who needed a lesson in leaving, no matter how many times she told herself it was for the best, her heart ached for the man she would love for the rest of her life, now a life apart.
A/N Cece you like twists, hope you liked this one to bring us back in line with how the show started. Also, I never thought Deep Fried Twinkie warranted as much attention as she received, I would rather have seen Gina get the time to explain WHY they split, not once but twice was so relevant. Just my opinion, yours may vary
