"Compassion hurts. When you feel connected to everything, you also feel responsible for everything. And you cannot turn away. Your destiny is bound with the destinies of others. You must either learn to carry the Universe or be crushed by it. You must grow strong enough to love the world, yet empty enough to sit down at the same table with its worst horrors."

― Andrew Boyd, Daily Afflictions: The Agony of Being Connected to Everything in the Universe

Chapter 3

Soon they were out of the forest and in the open. Boromir had continued his watch on the strange girl. She still spoke with the hobbits but had added the elf to her companions. During the day, there would be moments when she grew silent and distant. It was then that the girl seemed inhuman. Other times she would step to the side and pick herbs to dry off her pack. There was never any talk of where the girl come from or why she had come after them. It made Boromir even more suspicious.

Within a few days of leaving the forest behind them they were resting beneath Misty Mountains. Boromir had given up on watching the girl. Instead he had taken up training two of the hobbits with short swords below where she sat with the other hobbits. Frodo and Sam would laugh every once in a while when Merry and Pip would try to defend against the man. Kagome, however, wasn't paying attention. Her mind was far away, focusing on the memories that had come to her in the woods. Along with the memories had been a sort of power. She had been aware of the energy of the trees surrounding her. Now she could feel the energy of the rocks on the outcrop where she sat. They felt still and calm, the energy was slow but still moving. She reached out to it, slowing her own energy to match it.

"What's that?" she distantly heard Sam ask.

"Nothing," Gimli said gruffly. "Just a whiff of cloud."

"It's moving fast, against the wind." Boromir stated.

There was a moment of silence from the group. A sound like wings echoed distantly. "Crebain from Dunland!" Legolas yelled.

At that moment, Kagome felt her energy calmed. Her eyes slipped closed and her body stilled. Somewhere dancing on the edge of her senses there was a dark presence searching the area for something. It occurred to her that whatever it was must be searching for the ring and Frodo. Frodo's energy was not too far from her position, near Aragorn. The ring's energy was reaching out to the presence, wanting to be found. She reached out with her calmer energy and cast a barrier around the two. As soon as it passed she released the energy and the barrier. She took a deep breath realizing she had barely been breathing due to the rock's energy.

"What happened to you?" Boromir said coming out of hiding. "You vanished when the Crebain appeared."

"An old trick used to keep oneself safe." Kagome explained as though in a trance. "I drew energy from the rocks to camouflage myself. My energy mimics the other and so does my scent. While you couldn't see me, I was still there."

"You protected us, too, didn't you?" Frodo asked.

She nodded. "The ring was calling out, desiring to be found."

The group paled but had no time to react. Gandalf appeared from his hiding spot. He did not give any sign of hearing their conversation. "The passage South is being watched," he stated when he knew they were all gathered. "We must take the Pass of Caradhras."

Kagome raised her eyes to the mountain's summit. The memory of another mountain passed through her mind and she felt sick. So, she definitely did not like mountains then. Her fear would do her no good in the eyes of her new companions so she swallowed her fear. There was also her vow to Frodo to help in his quest. It was with that thought that she pushed herself forward up the mountain. Despite the calm Kagome felt something was off. Just in from of her Frodo lost his footing. She and Aragorn rushed forward to help him up.

"Are you alright?" she asked reaching out with her power to heal him.

"I'm fine," he muttered hand going to his neck for the ring. Suddenly more frantic he began to pull at his collar and looking around.

Kagome looked back to where Frodo had fallen from. There Boromir stood holding the ring by its chain. The off feeling grew stronger as he gazed at the ring. Her skin crawled as she recognized the ring's call. The look in his eyes told Kagome that he is feeling the call of the ring.

"It is a strange fate we should suffer so much fear and doubt… over so small a thing. Such a little thing." The man whispered. He reached with his other hand to touch the ring.

"Boromir!" Aragorn yelled snapping the other man out of his trance. "Give the ring to Frodo."

Kagome realized the tenseness of the man next to her and his hand on the hilt of his sword. Boromir kept himself neutral as he came forward. He muttered that he didn't care before ruffling Frodo's hair. When his eyes turned to her his faced dropped. There was no hiding what had happened from her and he knew that. An awkwardness crept in as the continued up the slope. Snow began to fall creating drifts as tall as Kagome. Gandalf himself plowed through the drifts creating a path for them and Legolas walked atop the snow ahead of him as a look out. The winds that tore at them carried a voice that caused the mountain to shake.

"Saruman," she whispered.

Again, fear threatened to swallow her. The white wizard had not been cruel to her or in any way controlling, like Gandalf, but there had been an evil in him. It was reminiscent of something she knew well. Like the dream, she had her first night with the Fellowship, she felt like the name of the evil was on the tip of her tongue. On top of the evil, his desire for the jewel and her power made her grateful for her trip to Rivendell.

Gandalf tried to cast against Saruman but it was no use. The men began to argue about what to do next. The more they did so the more Kagome realized just how good they were at it. When they could come to no conclusion they passed the decision to Frodo. Under the mountain or around. Isengard and Moria, neither sounded safe. Still, with Frodo deciding to go through the Mines they knew their path. By the time, they made it to the Gate of Moria darkness had fallen. The pony that had carried some of the Fellowship's gear was sent back knowing it would not make it in the mines. Near the wall of the Mines Gandalf, Legolas, and Gimli discussed the nature of dwarven doors. Gandalf laid his hands on the wall finding the secret doors.

"Ithildin," he whispered. "It mirrors only starlight and moonlight." The clouds above them began to part revealing the moon. The door revealed itself. "Ahh, it reads 'The Doors of Durin, Lord of Moria. Speak friend and enter."

"What does that mean?" Merry asked.

Kagome sat on a rock near the lake near the entrance. There was an ancient presence coiling beneath the surface, an evil reminiscent of the demons of old. She was beginning to feel that there were more of such creature in the world, particularly in the Mines of Moria. One of the hobbits began to throw stones in to the water. Aragorn rushed to stop them but it was too late. The coiling presence was awake. Kagome moved away from the water just as Frodo and Gandalf managed to open the doors. A tentacle shot out of the water and grabbed Frodo's leg. For the first time in centuries, Kagome let lose one of her arrows filled with her power. It struck true just after Legolas's.

Gandalf pulled her back as light poured over the lake. They all stood within the cave as the doors closed. Boromir and Legolas held torches as they picked their way through the mess of dwarven bodies. She felt choked by the overwhelming presence of death in the enclosed areas. This is truly a tomb, she thought. Besides her, only Gimli seemed affected by the scene and it occurred to her that he had mentioned his cousins ruling there. The bodies they stumbled over could be theirs.

"Watch your step, my lady." Boromir said coming closer to help guide her.

She said nothing but his words made a memory surface. She had been called that before with respect of her position, not that Boromir intended that. He had meant to defuse the situation like he had on the mountain by ruffling Frodo's hair. Perhaps there was even some respect from him now after seeing her power. She wasn't sure.

"What happened out there, Gandalf? What was that light?" One of the hobbits asked.

"Oh, that. That was Kagome's power. It is far stronger than many in this world, Meriadoc, and that was merely a small example of that great power." Gandalf explained starring of into the darkness.

A strange sensation swirled in her gut at his words. In Rivendell, she had experimented with her powers and, on the road, she had healed what Elrond could not. However, none of that truly compared to what she had just done. That moment of pure instinct had been like someone else had loosed the arrow, not her. She looked at her hands. But it had been her, her hand, her bow and arrows. She had taken its life. She followed the others still lost in her thoughts. So many had told her that she had been powerful, once worth a king's ransom when people had known of her and now if they knew worth killing for. There were people who would kill for her power to wield the jewel, there had been many in the past and now she knew of at least one.

"I do not know this place." Gandalf said as they stopped their wandering.

Everyone stilled as they waited for Gandalf to regain his bearings. Kagome sat away from him trying to send a message of distaste in his direction. In return he looked at her with grandfatherly sorrow that burned his heart. How could he do that? How could he go from a controlling and overprotective wizard to an old man who wanted to help and understand her? Very few had ever tried to keep her from fighting, that she could recall, but those that had all answered to Inuyasha, unless he had agreed. Her heart ached with memories of why he had kept her back.

"Gandalf, can she really be trusted?" Merry whispered.

"Hmp…Kagome? Yes, of course, she can be. She is just angry with me. I tried to keep her at Rivendell, away from the fighting. That is why she came in secret." Gandalf sighed. "I should have known she would find a way to fight."

"Why?" Pipin asked.

"Sauron is more her enemy than any other."

"That makes no sense," Boromir interjected. "Sauron is the enemy of all the Free Peoples of Middle Earth, not just one little girl."

"He is the enemy of her blood, Boromir. Their powers are in constant conflict, pure bright light and the deepest darkness. They will always be at odds."

Kagome sat in silence while they talked. There was no point in pretending she didn't hear them but she didn't respond. Sauron was more than the enemy of her blood and more than an opposing power. Only her missing memories held the key to the answer of just who he was and those memories were nowhere near returning. He must have played a part in her past, but which part? How had she known him then? What face had he worn in that life?

In her dream the cloaked man had told her to bring him his heart's desire and to complete the jewel but she had no idea where the last fragment was to be found. Then he mentioned a hobbit coming to him as well. She knew he had meant Frodo and the ring. She had a feeling that the man was Sauron or some version of him. What would happen it thee two were destroyed? Would he be destroyed as well? Then there was his comment about her caring for him with some part of her soul. That to her seemed intimate. Holding a person within one's soul should be reserved for lovers or children, parents even but not enemies. Not darkness incarnate. That didn't mean she hadn't, though, she had lived so many lives.

"Is there something wrong, Kagome?" Legolas asked quietly.

"It's nothing," she said waving it off. "Just lost in thoughts of the past."

"Are your memories painful?" he asked still concerned.

"Some memories are, but I remember very little. Of what I do remember the happy memories hurt the worst." Those of the orphan fox kit she had loved as her own, her human friends who had become her family, and Inuyasha. Every memory of him felt like a knife twisting in her gut. He had loved her and she thought she loved him.

"How old are you?" he asked confused.

She thought of admonishing him. One should not ask a lady her age, she would have said but any answer she gave him would lack an element of truth. "This body is fifteen years old." A part of her prayed he wouldn't take too much parse out her words.

She watched his brow furrow in confusion. "I don't…" but she was up and at the edge of the walkway with Frodo.

"There is something down there," she whispered. "It is not wholly dark but it has been deeply corrupted."

"Both you and Frodo seem to have noticed Gollum, Kagome. I fear he has been following us for some time."

"He escaped the dungeons of Barad-Dûr!" Frodo gasped.

"Escaped or set loose?" Gandalf asked gazing down wistfully. ""And now the Ring had drawn him here. He will never be rid of his need for it. He hates and loves the Ring, as he hates and loves himself."

A sadness took root in Kagome's heart. Such corruption was not new to her. "It's a pity Bilbo didn't kill him when he had the chance!" Frodo whispered.

"It was pity that stayed Bilbo's hand." Gandalf answered looking from Frodo to Kagome. "Many that live deserve death, and some that die deserve life."

"Do not be too eager to deal out death in judgment. Even the very wise cannot see all ends." She whispered softly. "Even those whose souls have been lost in the darkness may yet return to the light."

"Do not act so kindly towards creatures such as that, my lady. It is more likely to kill you than return such." Boromir warned mockingly.

Kagome ignored the Man and looked at Gandalf. "He was not always such a creature, was he?"

"He was once called Sméagol before the ring came to him. It drove him to madness and solitude. In the darkness, it gave him long life…"

"And in doing so destroyed a part of him." She looked away. "It is the same story, isn't it?"

"When we do not learn from our history, we are doomed to repeat it." Gandalf said nodding.

Kagome fell silent. She had thought the world different somehow. As though the darkness could be confined to one person or race. Not even in the past had it been so. She wondered what had made her believe such foolishness. Perhaps she was suffering from the naiveite of her younger body.

"I wish the Ring had never come to me. I wish none of this had happened."

"So, do all who live to see such times, but that is not for them to decide. All we have to decide is what to do with the time that is given to us. There are other forces at work in this world, Frodo, besides the will of evil. Bilbo was meant to find the Ring, in which case you also were meant to have it. And that is an encouraging thought." Gandalf said, glancing to Kagome. Fate was a mysterious force in the world. "Oh! It's that way."

The hobbits celebrated but Kagome remained silent. The darkness of the mines was beginning to wear on her. The path they followed led them down into a great hall Gimli called it the city of Dwarrowdelf. The carving of the great pillars was beautiful. She ran her hand over the runes reverently as she walked. Suddenly Gimli caught sight of a chamber of the main hall and ran for it. Kagome and the others followed him into a room filled with even more bodies and a great sarcophagus. Gandalf translated the name on the tomb as Balin, son of Fundin, Gimli's cousin. Kagome knelt beside him and wrapped her arm around him. Tears stung at her eyes as she longed to morn alongside him for all that she had lost.

"I'm so sorry, Gimli," she whispered sending out waves of calm and comfort.

Gandalf read the rocrods of the battle aloud. The Dwarves had been unprepared for the invasion force they'd faced. Gimli whimpered through most of it but still finding anger in the words and the strength to fight. A sudden noise broke through the silence as Pippin knocked something down a deep well. The echo stirred he stillness of the mines. Deep within the mines it felt like something was waking. The wizard burst into anger at the hobbit but the sound of drumming cut him off. The forces that had whipped out the dwarves of Moria had not left. Aragorn, Boromir, and Legolas rushed to seal the door as the others barred their weapons. In an oddly familiar motion, Kagome closed her eyes and prayed for strength and the power to stop the darkness.

She opened her eyes slowly just as the Orcs and Goblins stormed through the door. Her arrow loosed first and took down three goblins. The others rushed forward with swords and axes into battle. Kagome was a world of calm as she fired her arrows one by one into the horde. The cave troll came through the door next, breaking down what remained of the door, and she moved out of its way with the grace of a seasoned warrior. She loosed several more arrows into the horde before Legolas knocked her over as they horde managed to come closer. When she pushed herself up the trance had been broken. Legolas covered her as though nothing had changed. She looked around at the destruction of the battle. Not too far away was one of her arrows in the center of a group of five goblins.

"Are you alright?" Legolas asked offering her his hand.

"I'm fine," she answered pulling herself up. "Where's Frodo?"

There were screams followed by a crash from where the others were fighting. The two shared a look and ran to their aid. The group circled around where Frodo and the spear in his chest. Kagome gasped, calling upon her healing powers but nothing came. She swayed as she tried again. The battle had drained all her strength; she couldn't save him. She felt so low and useless. Frodo sat up suddenly, pushing the spear away.

"How?' she whispered.

He opened his shirt revealing a mail shirt made of silver steal. She reached out and touched it to be sure that it was still intact. Sensing he was fine she let her arm drop.

"Mithril, you are full of surprises, Master Baggins." Gimli breathed.

Kagome had relaxed a little but she felt her weakness achingly strong within herself. If it hadn't been for the strange armor he'd hidden, Frodo would have died and she would have been powerless to save him. A voice mocked her in her mind. It changed forms, sometime male, others female, at times familiar, and others foreign. It ate away at her insides. Could she really help their quest or did she just add more danger?

"Hurry, we must get to the Bridge of Khazad-dûm!" Gandalf said pulling her up and forcing her forward.

As the ran an even darker presence than before closed in behind them. The group pushed themselves along faster. The two Men took up the hobbits and Gandalf pushed her to Legolas who pulled her along just as fast. Her vision began to blur but she fought to stay awake. Then the dark presence was upon them. Its dark presence burned along the core of her power. Pain exploded within her soul and she stumbled forward, somehow managing to stay on the pathway. She looked back, meeting Gandalf's eyes.

"Go, this foe is beyond all of you." He gave her a meaningful look. "Go!"

The group ran across the deep chasm as Gandalf held the monster back. The monster pushed Gandalf and between the two combatants the bridge began to collapse. The wizard had cast down his enemy down but the fiery whip of the monster came out of the chasm wrapping around Gandalf. The wizard was pulled back and down into the chasm. The others began to scream out his name. Kagome's world, however, had gone silent and their words couldn't reach her. Then there was a voice in her head, the voice from her dream. You can't even save him. So mighty and yet you have no power now. She couldn't even cry, her tears wouldn't come.

"Aragorn," Gandalf's voice rang out. "Protect her! Protect the light!" And then he began to slip. "Fly you fools."

The bridge continued to collapse as the remaining members of the Fellowship tried to escape. Walking in to the light and taking a breath of clean air felt strange as she turned to look back into the darkness. Her world spun as she continued to walk backwards. It felt like someone had pulled her world right from underneath her. She could still hear Gandalf's and the strange voice's words echoing in her ears. Perhaps it would have been wiser to remain in Rivendell with Lord Elrond.