Title: Thnks Fr Th Mmrs

Disclaimer: If my friend and I owned the Kingdom Hearts series, this would be a movie and yaoi galore would be everywhere. Do you see the yaoi everywhere? Didn't think so.

Author's note: Sorry it took so long to get this next chapter out. We both hope you enjoy it. It sent us into giggle fits just writing it.

Pairings: RikuSora, AxelRoxas, and more

Warnings: particle physics references, implied homosexuality, Oprah and republican bashing (not reflective of our own views. But come on, everyone knows a liberal like Roxas is in this story. Everyone.). Parolee-bashing, flamers, dungeons and dragons references secret crushes, hints of molestation, insane scientists, college know-thy-neighbor games, public humiliation and more.

Chapter Three: In Case God Doesn't Show

"What the hell brought this on?" Sora's gaze rested on the floor, the bi-spectacled boy nibbling on his bottom lip. Roxas crossed his arms, rolling his matching blue eyes.

"Well, it's a long story."

"Is it now?" Axel gave the grin that always managed to send shivers down Sora's spine: the creepy smile. "Did it really warrant that video message you sent me? Or the chaos you caused across campus?" Roxas too broke into a blush. He was probably imagining the rumors spreading faster than a brushfire about his immaturity and the nerd he was chasing across campus.

"That's beside the point Axel." Roxas's voice rose slightly, a few people peeking around the hall corner.

Sora reached over and tugged on Roxas's arm; he was the image of embarrassment. "Can we speak of this somewhere else?" With a roll of his eyes Roxas took Sora's hand into his own and began stomping down the hallway. Axel smirked at the cousins walking side by side, following along at his own leisurely pace. Back down the hallways, students and teachers alike who had peeked out during the commotion were back in class, trying to continue on with the lesson. Axel could only imagine the things they heard as the two ran down the corridors.

Axel paused once again in his step as he heard another Sora shriek. What did Roxas do now? Axel rolled his green eyes and turned the corner. Roxas was holding on tightly to Sora's arm while the brunette practically clawed his way back to Axel's side. Axel raised an eyebrow, noting the two were stopped at the next corner.

At Axel's confused look, Roxas rolled his eyes and clung to his cousin tighter. "We turned the corner – Stop moving Sora! – and Sora shrieked. Next thing I know he's trying to hide here." Sora wiggled himself free but clung to Axel's arm.

"Sora?" Axel's eyebrows knitted in confusion. "What's going – " A pair of footsteps came from the hallway Sora was hiding from. The brunette froze. Blue eyes darted back and forth behind his coke bottle glasses. As Roxas opened his mouth, Sora shook his head. He made a nervous hand gesture. It made Axel anxious himself; Zexion would be intrigued to hear how easily Axel became attached.

"What?" Roxas hissed.

Sora flinched, "Talk, but not about me." The two shared a look and shrugged.

Roxas rocked back and forth; the trio listening the footsteps come closer. "So… how about that crazy first week?"

"It was insane." Axel smirked, slipping easily back into his carefree attitude, leaning against the wall. Sora quickly took up position behind Axel, placing the Grad student between him and the person walking around the corner.

Roxas knew not to turn around completely, but he gave a quick peek. Axel withheld a catcall, his smirk widening. Oh, I see. It was one of the more popular lacrosse players in Harvard and not just for his athletic ability. He looked to be in-between classes, carrying a small shoulder bag and probably texting on his cell phone. The sophomore walked right past, completely ignoring the trio hugging close to the wall nearby. He glanced up at a classroom number and entered.

When the heavy oak door closed, Axel rounded on Sora with Roxas coming up right beside him. Sora glanced back and forth between his cousin and the closest thing to a best friend. When Axel wiggled his eyebrows slightly, Sora's face turned bright red with a blush.

Roxas hummed slightly, a small smile making its way across his face. "So that's him, huh?" Sora didn't respond.

Axel was not Sora's only new friend.

When Sora first met Demyx, the first thing the faux-hawked music major did, after taking one look each at the freshman and his infamous companion, was launch into a lecture about the consequences of statutory rape, especially with regards to Axel's already existing probation. Sora protested that he was to be nineteen in January, thank you very much. Axel's protest drowned Sora's out.

"WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK I'M A CHILD MOLESTER?" Several heads around the quad couldn't help but turn in morbid fascination, despite their familiarity with Axel's voice and habitually uncomfortable proclamations.

Demyx sighed and pursed his lips, emoting that the answer to this question was obvious, but that if Axel didn't get it, he wasn't going to be the first to disillusion him. "There was that one time when we found Pence locked in your dorm wearing a dress, but I'm sure that was 'just coincidence'." Demyx was not above making the air quotes.

"Well, it was. And I think I'm past defending myself for that one, don't you?" Axel said with outrageous superciliousness.

And so Sora never lacked camp in his life.

When Sora met Zexion, accurately described by Axel as "small, gothy, and always in a lab coat" it was under Demyx's guidance—Axel being at work at the time—a situation made more awkward by Zexion's conviction that Demyx was the antimatter to his stable life. Fortunately for Demyx and Sora, he was fairly oblivious to the world when engrossed in a bit of volatile chemical engineering, and the lab only had two exits. He was outflanked, he would later contend.

He did not intend to go down without a fight, however. As soon as the doors locked, he reached under the lab bench and pulled out what looked to Sora like—

"Is that a ray gun?" the freshman asked Demyx.

"Oh sweet Lord, he built another one."

"Anoth--?"

"It's the old one," the scientist said in a steely voice. He stepped out from behind the lab bench to aim more decisively at Demyx.

"You dumpster dove for it?" the immaculately dressed blonde sounded horrified.

"I spent a lot of time on it. Who is this?"

"Oh!" said Demyx flightily. "This is Sora, one of Axel's."

"…thought he liked his nerds better dressed."

Sora was opening and closing his mouth in dismay.

"Don't be like that; he's probably being traumatized enough, poor baby. Sora?" Demyx spoke gently to the dazed-looking brunette. "This is Zexion. Why don't you tell him something about you, Zexion?"

"…Are you truly trying to start icebreakers?"

"Come oooonnnn, Zexion."

"Fine. I hate icebreakers."

Demyx pouted. Seeing this had no effect on the other man, he decided to try another tactic. "Oh Sora," his voice became a sugary falsetto, "Would you mind going first? The other children are shy."

Sora snapped out of his daze. "Ok. I'm not one of Axel's." Zexion smirked appreciatively; freshmen were usually too terrified to speak, much less stand up for themselves against harmless teasing, until the third quarter of the year. Demyx just looked betrayed. He drew in breath for a good loud reprimand, but was interrupted by the text jingle of his phone—Axel had arrived. Demyx left to meet him.

The two remaining young men stared at each other in a kind of quiet understanding. Zexion spoke first.

"He locked the door again?"

"…Yeah."

Zexion sighed.

"Hey, sorry we barged in on you while you were working. I kinda got dragged along."

"I believe you."

"So…do you enjoy your science work?"

"Very much so."

"Do you do it for fun?"

"You could say that, I suppose. I don't spend my extra hours in the lab, though."

"What do you do?"

The Goth boy began to take off his gloves. "Among other things, I poison Axel's coffee with carcinogens for all the trouble he gives me." Sora laughed, until he saw that Zexion was quite seriously waiting for horror in his reaction. He wasn't joking.

And then Axel and Demyx reentered, and Zexion acted as if nothing had happened.

And so Sora never lacked quiet psychosis in his life.

When Sora met Riku, he was dancing by himself in the Harvard Square fountain. He was in a euphoric state—the spray was flying by his face in perfect pure droplets, the water was cool on his heated skin, he had just gotten a B on his general chemistry exam—and he had just spotted a rainbow in the mist from the fountain. He turned back, trying to get to the angle at which he had seen it.

Then he saw a god.

He was a silver-haired Apollo in a lacrosse jersey. He would later be told, by a very snarky Roxas, that his name was Riku. He was the single sexiest being Sora had ever laid eyes on.

Their eyes met across the spray, and a million bells rang. The birds spontaneously began to twitter in harmony. The silver-haired deity began to glide towards him, and the students milling on the grass behind him broke into song. A mass of sorority girls began to dance on the rocks around him in Busby Berkley-esque choreography, and the singing reached a crescendo as Riku stopped in front of him, put his arms around him, and pulled him into a passionate kiss—fireworks erupted from the roof of every building in Boston—

Sora snapped out of his daydream suddenly. He was standing stock still with his mouth hanging open. He could barely see through his wet glasses, and his large Monty Python shirt was soaked and clinging to his skinny chest. He didn't dare look below his waist for more sources of embarrassment. About half of the lacrosse team, walking with Riku, was staring with some concern at Sora.

The ensuing revelation was like the Fall of Mankind, in the scope and nature of its horror. Sora had of course been teased for being a nerd before; but, being possessed of some wisdom as well as intellect, he had dismissed these unthinking remarks on the grounds that it didn't matter if he was a nerd, so long as it made him happy. But love makes fools of us all. For the first time, Sora was deeply, painfully self-conscious of how much of a geek he was.

And Roxas, hearing his cousin's painful recounting hours later, thought that with some careful guidance, Sora might yet see the light of social normalcy after all.

And so Sora's freshman year would never be the same.