Reno snatched the Soldier's by Rufus' door from their posts and barked orders for a limo stocked to the top with alcohol and an elevator key so he didn't have to run back down all the hundreds of millions of stairs that seemed to stretch like an unruly behemoth between the top floor and the bottom floor. The Soldier's snapped to it and Reno was immediately presented with an elevator key, something he was sure Tseng would take from him the second he knew he had it but he was happy to have it anyways. He doubted he would get his wish for alcohol, but there was always some kind of drink at Rufus' mansion so he could wait for it. Eliza was sniffling quietly beside him and he was about four more sniffles away from shoving a Kleenex so deep into her sinuses that she'd never need one again. He hated it when people cried. It drove him nuts. He might get some enjoyment out of making her scream though; he would have to start planning ways to make her upset with him. If she got distraught enough she might force Rufus to assign someone else to her. He was sure Elena would simply cherish the chance to have the brat gloat about all her clothes and make-up and money to her.
Eliza followed Reno quietly, nose in the air. She was under the impression that if she held it up high enough she'd eventually reach air that didn't reek so badly of sweaty old cigarettes. She'd have to carry a can of air-freshener with her while he was in her house if he was going to insist on smoking and sweating so badly. She was going to have to lay down some rules; he was not going to be smoking anywhere near her. Cigarettes killed people and she wasn't going to die because he was an addict.
Reno slipped into the limo and immediately began rifling through the mini-fridge in the back. Lo and behold, wine coolers. Wine coolers weren't his first choice for an alcoholic beverage, but in a pinch they would do. Eliza stepped into the limo after him and shut the door daintily and he rolled his eyes as he twisted off the top of his wine cooler. The Soldier's that were supposed to accompany them would meet them at the house with reinforcements, until then the blonde was, unfortunately, solely his responsibility. "Hey driver, stop by my place first I've gotta get some clothes if I'm gonna be stayin' with the brat for the next couple weeks."
Eliza decided to ignore his comment and let the driver change directions without commentary. She didn't need to give the red-head more incentive to insult her; he had obviously been prejudiced against her by the tabloids that slandered her. She watched as the red-head downed his wine cooler after giving the driver directions to his home, noting the time of day with disgust. She had barely noticed the change from night to day, but as she looked at her very expensive and very precise wristwatch, she realized that she had spent the entire night crying in Rufus' office while he did paperwork and cleaned up the mess. She didn't take the time to recognize that her brother had sacrificed sleep to stay with her, he could have easily delegated the clean-up process to someone else and gone home, but he hadn't. He had apparently been working late anyways, but he still could have given up on her and gone home hours before. She was too offended by Reno's drinking at seven in the morning to be concerned with a show of graciousness from her aloof brother. "You do realize what time it is, don't you?"
"Nope. Don't care either." Reno sucked down wine coolers happily, letting the alcohol warm him. He hated Midgar winters, they were always ridiculously cold. He supposed that that was because it was winter and winter was meant to be cold, but he still wasn't going to be happy about it. Nature pissed him off sometimes; why couldn't it just be summer all year long?
"It's seven in the morning and you're drinking already?" Eliza frowned and glared at him, eyes still red from crying. She hated alcoholics. Her father had been one and Rufus was turning into one as well. Every time she saw him now there was a glass of amber colored liquid within easy reach of his hands.
Reno sighed and rubbed his face wearily. He was going to have to lay down the law with the bitch before she got the thought in her head that he was supposed to do what she said. "Listen, Lizzie, I don't give a damn what time it is I will do what I want when I want and not give a shit about what you think. If you've got somethin' ta say about it go ahead but don't expect me to listen, care, or do a damn thing you say." The limo stopped and Reno nearly shouted praise to the gods as he was given an excuse to leave Eliza's company.
Eliza fumed as Reno hopped out of the limo and rushed into the building they had stopped at, head bowed against the snow-strewn, frigid wind. She would not tolerate someone so crass and crude thinking he was in charge of her. She was Eliza Shinra and she deserved to be treated with respect. She hadn't done anything to earn the respect she thought she deserved, but that didn't deter her from demanding it.
Reno grabbed a rarely used duffel bag out of his closet and started packing it with clothes and other necessities. He hated the fact that he wouldn't be able to sleep somewhere familiar, he could never fall asleep when he wasn't acquainted with the place he was staying at. A touch of familiarity would allow him to sleep and, as he looked around deciding just what it was he should take, might possibly get him fired. The answer to his question caught his eye as his pet iguana, Trevor, walked into the room. Trevor was just as alcoholic as his owner, something that disgusted Elena and just about everyone else who had been to his house, but Reno didn't care. He loved his iguana, no matter how often it bit him or scratched him or ignored him. He gathered up Trevor's things, his cage, his food, and finally Trevor himself, and then grabbed his duffel bag. Eliza would most likely refuse to allow the iguana to stay, but Reno knew how to convince her. He cackled madly as he walked outside with Trevor under one arm and his things under the other arm, ignoring the bites the iguana laid on his hand.
Eliza shrieked when Reno re-entered the car, laying the iguana on the seat beside her. The iguana was green, scaly, and the second most unwelcome thing that had entered her car. Reno shoved his things into the car and slammed the door shut behind him, a wide, smug grin plastered on his face as he ordered the driver to go to her house. As the car took off Eliza panicked, scooting as far away form the lizard beside her as she could. "You're not bringing that thing!"
Reno frowned at her and stroked Trevor's back, something the iguana didn't seem to mind too badly. "Yes I am. He's my pet and I'm not gonna leave him to starve to death. Its cruel and its not gonna happen."
"Don't you have someone else who can take care of him? What do you do with him when you go on missions!" Eliza shuddered as the iguana looked at her, pressing against the door.
"I usually leave Trevor with a kennel place but it's easier if he can come with me. Kennels are horrible. They keep him in a cage to sit and wallow in his own poop and I'm not gonna let him live like that for weeks if it can be avoided so just sit back, shut up, and learn to like him." Reno sipped at his wine cooler happily and watched Eliza squirm.
Eliza kept as far from the iguana as she could during the ride home and the iguana didn't seem to care about her one bit. It was too busy biting at Reno's hand to notice her. Eliza took it as proof of how horrible Reno was when his own pet didn't want to have him touching it. Reno seemed devoted to the creature, however, and she couldn't say no to the pet when she thought about the conditions it would be put under in a kennel. Perhaps the iguana would keep Reno out of her hair. If it pooped all over her house she was going to have a fit; the maids didn't deserve the demeaning task of cleaning up iguana shit stains. "You're going to clean up after it."
Reno rolled his eyes and set Trevor on his shoulder, grabbing his things as the car stopped. "Course I am. He's mine. I take care of my stuff...well, at least the stuff that eats and breathes and shit like that." He stepped out of the limo and into the expansive garage the limo had parked in. He wasn't surprised to see so many expensive cars parked around, Rufus Shinra and his father had a thing for cars that made three miles to the gallon and went from zero to one hundred in six point seven seconds. Reno purposefully smudged his finger across the hood of one of the cars as he followed Eliza into the mansion, noting the dust that built up on the pad of his finger with amusement. Rufus might buy fancy cars, but that didn't mean he ever drove them. It was a shame really, but Reno could care less what Rufus wasted his money on. So long as Reno got paid he could care less.
Eliza rushed into the house as quickly as possible; brushing past the Soldier's stationed at the door. She knew she was safe now and she allowed her normal demeanor to shine through in all its haughty smugness. Reno followed her in and started talking to the Soldier's losing her interest as quickly as the bit of humanity his iguana made him show had gathered it. She needed a bath and fresh clothes and warm food and she needed them as soon as possible. She was starving and looked like a disaster. As she began climbing the stairs to her room, Reno stopped her with a short whistle. "Hey, Lizzie! Not so fast we've gotta set some ground rules."
"It can wait until after I get cleaned up." Eliza started back up the stairs again and Reno whistled once more, making her frown and turn back around. "If you keep whistling at me like a dog, I'm going to have you fired!"
"The coke-whore look suits you and you respond better when I treat you like a dog." Reno set Trevor on the floor and let him run off to explore his new tromping ground, knowing that there wouldn't be any cats or dogs around to harm his surprisingly vulnerable little biter. Rufus wouldn't allow any other pets beside Dark Nation to stay in his mansion and the guard hound never left his side so Reno had nothing to worry about. "Don't bother trying to get me fired; Rufus sent me here to keep you in line and giving you hell is part of the job description."
"You were sent here to protect me, not order me around and be my nanny!" Eliza filed the coke-whore comment away for further study, she wasn't quite sure what a proper response to that would be but she would think one up. Reno didn't look like he was afraid of recycling insults and he would probably use that one again.
Reno plopped onto the couch and patted the seat cushion next to him. "Shut the hell up and sit down or I'm going to assign all the rules myself and you'll stay locked in your room for the next few weeks. I may even be generous enough to have a cat door installed so we can pass food in for you."
Eliza frowned and sat on a chair across from him, determined to stay out of his reach. "You're an asshole."
"And you're a bitch. Now that we've got that bit established, let's talk rules." Reno threw his arm over the back of the couch and tossed one of his legs onto the cushions, allowing himself to get comfortable.
"My house, my rules!" Eliza crossed her arms over her chest and slipped one leg over the other, making sure her body language made her as closed off as possible. Reno might be an open book, but she would be as enigmatic as possible.
"Yeah, right." Reno snorted, noting the blood on the bottom of Eliza's socks with curiosity. "Whose blood did ya tramp in?"
"One of the maids." Eliza shuddered at the reminder of the night before, remembering why Reno was in her home in the first place. I'll be back for ya, sweetheart! Eliza shuddered and pulled her arms closer to her chest.
Reno nodded and ran a hand through his hair. "So here are the first couple rules; if you hurt Trevor, I hurt you; if you try to boss me around, I'll lock you in your room; if you so much as look outside without my permission, I'll cuff you to your bed and you won't see sunshine for a week. Any questions?"
Eliza frowned, "You can't lock me in my room!"
"Wanna test that theory?" Reno raised an eyebrow at her, his voice threateningly calm.
Eliza opened her mouth to retort and then shook her head, sighing softly. "No."
"Good. Go clean the make-up off your face you look like a whore-clown." Reno grabbed a remote from the coffee table between them and started pressing buttons, trying to figure out where the television was and what he would have to do to find his favorite channels.
Eliza stood up and stomped to her room irritably, wishing she had a better response to his insults. None of her books had taught her the proper way to deal with an uncouth jerk like Reno, but she would figure it out. She did have a computer and she was pretty sure there would be a website out there somewhere with retorts she could put to good use on the wily red-head. She jumped and screamed as the iguana walked past her down the stairs, ignoring her girlishness as he slowly moved to see Reno. Eliza frowned as she heard Reno laugh from the bottom of the stairs, his EMR quickly tucked back inside his jacket. "You are such a pansy!" She turned on her heel and stomped up the rest of the stairs, determined to find a way to wipe the smug smile off his face.
Reno scooped up Trevor and set him on his shoulder, frowning as he tried to lower his adrenalin output. Even if he was having the time of his life busting Eliza's chops, he was on guard duty first and foremost and if anything happened to her he would find the working end of a gun at the back of his head. He decided to give up on watching television; he couldn't find the damn thing even though he could hear it behind one of the walls. He could always try again later, but for now he decided he should probably take a look around the manor and figure out where any weak spots were in the defenses they had set up. If people could get in once they could probably get in twice and Reno was supposed to be there to stop them and there was always the chance he would find some alcohol during his peek around the house. "You look like you could use a drink, Trevor." Trevor stopped biting his hair, a sure sign that he approved of the idea. Reno chuckled and walked around the mansion happily, enjoying what could possibly be the last moments of peace he would get during his stay.
Vietta's Author's Note: So sorry this has taken so long! Hopefully it's good enough to make up for the wait. Now that I'm not so far behind with my own stories it will be MUCH easier to update this one. We've got lots planned for you, dear readers, prepare yourselves!
