Lunch Time

Seras Victoria sat at the small table in the Hellsing kitchen trying to think of something that would be easy to make but still have a taste other then burnt. She sighed, "Why did Integra assign me kitchen duty?" she thought. Just then the intercom on the wall came to life, "Seras...Seras... come in Seras." Integra called. Seras slipped out of her chair and pushed the talk button, "I'm her Sir. Integra." she said. "Very good, I'm just calling to see how lunch is coming along, we're getting a little hungry in here." Seras sighed once again. You see today was when the Convention of Twelve would meet up for their every-other-weekly Round Table Conference, and Seras Victoria was supposed to cook for them. "Uh...it's coming along great." she lied, "Should be ready...really soon."

"Very good, We'll be waiting." The intercom went silent, turning back towards the stove Seras decided that she should probably just check a cook book and wing it. Unfortunately after 10 minutes of searching it became evident that Hellsing's kitchen did not carry cook books,"Shit! Now what?" Seras thought "Alright Seras don't panic, lets just make...Sandwiches!" She grinned. It was perfect, simple yet elegant, opening the fridge she began to pull out the the ingredients she would need" Bread, ham, mayo, mustard, onions, and so on.

Once ready she used her vampiric speed to whip up a tray full of succulent delicious sandwiches, "Well, they look better then I expected." she thought with smile. Just then a group of Hellsing guards clattered into the kitchen laughing, singing, and obviously drunk. Upon seeing the sandwiches their eyes lit up. "Hey! Seras made us some lunch!" one yelled, "Wait what? No!" Seras exclaimed "These are for Integra and her friends." she tried to block their way but there were too many. 20 minutes later all the men left and the sandwiches were gone.

Seras stared at the empty tray that used to hold her mountain of food sat, "Perfect, just perfect." she thought angrily. Sighing she quickly grabbed her coat and left for the store, 30 minutes later she as back with a new batch of ingredients which she quickly slapped together into another tray of subs. Once done she stepped back to see her work, it didn't look as great as the first batch but she didn't think anyone would care. Carefully she picked up the heavy tray and slowly tip-toed towards he conference room, "Slowly...slowly...careful..." she chanted her mantra as she walked. "So far so good." Just then a certain elder vampire slipped up through the floor behind Seras, Alucard grinned as he watched his fledgling struggling with the tray. "Perfect." he thought gliding right up behind her, "Hey there Police Girl!" he yelled.

Seras screamed and launched the tray into the air, causing the sandwiches to splatter all over the floor. "Master!" Seras whined "Why did you do that?" she look down at the mess distressed. Alucard was laughing his head off, "Oh Man! You should have seen your face! Priceless!" he said between breaths. Seras' lip began to quiver, "That wasn't funny, I worked hard on those." she said he voice cracking. Alucard waved his hand "Ah, who cares, they were probably bad anyway." he said dismissively. Seras frowned, kicked Alucard's shin with her steel toe boot, and began to walk away.

"That didn't hurt!" Alucard called after her, "I'm a vampire. I don't feel pain." he grinned. Seras stopped in her tracks and tried to calm her self but failed. Turing around she kicked Alucard in the crotch, "Mommy!" Alucard squeaked, he slowly sunk on to the floor moaning. "Oh by the way, as maid, it's your job to clean this up." Seras added as a parting shot.

-xxxx-

20 minutes later Seras Victoria was walked down the halls once more with another tray of sandwiches, after her second trip to the store Seras was getting a little fed up with the whole situation and wished Walter would come back soon. As she rounded a corner Seras heard the thundering of boots and the distant yelling of Hellsing's (still drunk) troops. "How the 'ell did he get out?" one asked, "I don't know! Just run!" another answered. Their voices and foot steps grew louder, "You think he'll really kill us?" a third asked.

The stampede of soldiers turned the corner and ran towards Seras, "Out of the way!" their leader yelled, Seras flattened herself against the wall as the men past by. Once they were gone she let out a sigh or relief and rounded the corner only to slam right into Pip, who was chasing the troops. The force of the collision sent Seras, Pip, and the tray of sandwiches crashing onto the hard marble floor, "Oh my dear Seriz!" Pip exclaimed when he saw who he crashed into "I really apologize for knocking you down." he stood up and offered her his hand. She slapped it away and got up by her self, "Aw come on. I'm sorry." Pip said as he picked off the tomato and cheese from her head, "Zere, zee beautiful flower is-" CRACK! The sound of Seras' fist colliding with Pip's jaw echoed through the hall as he fell onto the floor unconscious.

-xxxx-

Hellsing Round Table Meeting Room

The members of the Convention of Twelve sat in silence waiting for their lunch which had been promised to them over an hour ago. Someone's stomach growled, "Where is the food," Sir. Shelby M. Penwood whined "I'm getting really hungry." "We're all hungry!" Another member snapped. Penwood scowled "This is ridicules! Lets just go out to eat." he said angrily, "Never!" another member called out slamming his fist against the table "We've eaten at Hellsing Manor over 30 years! It's tradition." Integra signed and laid her head down on the table. "I miss Walter." she thought unhappily.

Just the door burst open and Seras Victoria entered the room carrying two large bags of burgers from a local McDonald's, "Lunch is served!" she called out as she spilled the burgers on the table. The eleven men and Intgra stared at the pile, "What is this?" Penwood asked picking up a Mcdouble, "It's a hamburger, and if you know whats good for you,you'll eat it." Seras threatened with a slightly crazed look in her eyes. Penwood gulped and quickly stuffed a hamburger into his mouth wrapping and all. Seras smiled, gave Integra a salute, and left the room, Integra sighed again "I really miss Walter." she thought.

End