Documentary 2: The Second Roll
I own nothing. As always. So yea. By the way, the whole...you'll see. Well, this whole chapter is kinda an inside joke, so, just laugh at the sheer idiocity of it all. (Me and my friends are dorks)
Documentary 2: The Second Roll
Ch.3-Michael! (dun dun nuh nuh nuh) Jackson! (dun dun nuh nuh nuh)
BPOV
As Edward pulled up the curb in front of my house, he was angry. Angry at Mike. Or "stupid, weird ass, outlandish, vile Mike Newton" as we were now calling him.
"How dare he say something like that to you!"
"I dunno."
"Not the answer I was looking for."
"Oh."
"Well…."
"I mean, c'mon Edward. My body is pretty great, and you can't tell me that you don't want some of this!" I said moving my hands down my body.
"Grr. Don't do that."
"So it's true?"
"Duh."
I just smiled.
Then we went inside. I struggled with my books up the stairs, usually Edward offers to help but he was distracted by something, probably my ass, since everybody else seemed to be and by the time I made it to my room, my arms were burning with the white hot intensity of 1000 suns. Yea. I'm a drama queen.
I was scrambling through the door way, hoping to make it the next 3 feet to my bed without dying, when…I died.
My old camera in its case was sitting right in the middle of the floor. And me being the genius that I am, tripped over it.
"AGHHHH!" I screamed, the books went flying, but there was only one thud.
That one was my head hitting the foot of my bed.
"Ow."
"Are you okay?"
"Do I look okay?"
"Uh…"
"Not the answer I was looking for." I quoted.
"Sorry." Edward set the books on my bed and ran to my side.
"Ow."
"Yea. Sorry."
"Should be."
"Sorry."
I ignored him. I was gonna give him the silent treatment until he apologized….wait, he already did.
"I'm okay." And I got up, it didn't really hurt that bad and I would probably have a bruise on my forehead, but that would be okay. I guess.
Edward grabbed my hand and helped me up, he gave me a hug and then we started doing homework.
Well…Edward started doing homework, I went to grab my camera.
Camera turns on
"This is Edward….doing homework." Edward makes a peace sign
"You're boring."
Camera turns off
"I'm doing homework of course I'm boring."
"Yea. Well, best get truckin."
two seconds later
"Done."
"WHAT! NOT FAIR! DO MINE!"
"Uh…that'd be cheating. And I want to preserve your moral integrity."
"Moral integrity is overrated."
"Uh…"
"Yea. Moral Integrity is overrated. So is homework. I'm NOT-A-GONNA DO IT!" I crossed my arms and leaned back in my desk chair. Mistake. I'm pretty sure you can guess what happens.
"AGHHHHHH!" (again). This time it was the back of my head hitting the floor. Yea. Ow.
"Ow. Nice reflexes Edward. Way to catch me."
"I was unaware of the fact that you were falling."
"Really? So the AGHHHHHH!" I was attempting to get up while saying this, and obviously I can't talk and walk at the same time and I slipped off of the back of the chair, falling, thankfully, this time on my butt.
"Ow! AGAIN!" Geez.
Camera turns on
"This is Bella. She has just fallen on her ass and it was kinda funny. Sorry." Bella is scowling into the camera.
"Gimme my camera!"
Bella puts her arms up and then the camera shakes no and then she pouts and crosses her arms.
"Give it."
"Uh-uh."
"Why not?"
"Because."
"Fichu lapin-vampire serait croire il est si avoir chaud parce que il pouvoir courir tous rapide…fichu." (By the way, that's French for…)
"Did you just call me a 'stupid rabbit-vampire thing who thinks he's all cool because he can run all fast?' in French?"
"Yes."
"Well, I don't even know if that's how you'd use sentence structure…but…point taken. Here's your camera."
Camera gets handed off
"Thank you. Fichu lapin."
Laughter from both sides. Camera turns off.
"What am I gonna do with you?"
"Help me up then take me out for ice cream?"
"Uh…I'll help you up, but it's 45 degrees outside and raining buckets, wouldn't you rather…do something else?"
"Uh…like what?"
"Well…."
Edward snaked his arms around my waist and pulled me up against his chest so I was looking up into his face. I suddenly pictured myself in a long dress from the Civil War era with my hair blowing backwards in the wind and Edward wearing a nice suit like thing with a funny moustache. Woah. Maybe I shouldn't have watched Gone With the Wind last night…while eating pickles and chocolate fudge. (shudder).
"W-wait a minute. How is this any better than ice cream? You're probably colder."
"So…."
"Uh…I have no defense."
"Good."
Then I did something so completely embarrassing….I screamed….
"MICHAEL! (dun dun nuh nuh nuh) JACKSON! (dun dun nuh nuh nuh)"
"What?"
"Did I just say that out loud?"
"Uh…yea!"
"Uh…."
Then he laughed.
So in case you were wondering...THE INSIDE JOKES! (There are 7)
1. MICHAEL! (dun dun nuh nuh nuh) JACKSON! (dun dun nuh nuh nuh) thing. So my 2 BFF's and my BF have this game we play, we call it Random. You have to say something totally random in a public place (I.E. school, the mall, a grocery store, a book store, a library, a classroom more specifically English, but that's another story) and it has to make random people stare. But the other three players can't laugh or else you win and the loosers have to do something stupid. (Such as running around the track at a football game in ur bathing suit top and shorts...once again, another story.) So yea, we were in this store and it was my BF's turn, he was thinking about it for a minute, then he yelled out: MICHAEL! and he hummed (dun dun nuh nuh nuh) JACKSON! (dun dun nuh nuh nuh). He won. I laughed so hard that a cashier lady had to get me some H2O and a washcloth so i could regain stamina or whatev. My one friend was looking at a shirt rack and she fell into it, (i know like when ur a kid and you hide) and my other friend was in a dressing room and she was laughing and then we heard a thump and then 'ow.' yes. good times.
2.Fichu lapin (or stupid rabbit): Yea. my BF, Austin, called me this, because he is in French class, 'cause I fell off our bench at our eating table and hit my butt and yelled, "OW MY BUTT!" out in the middle of lunch. (?? rabbit)
3.Gone with the Wind and pickles and hot fudge: well, it is what it is. Me and my friends were at...my house...yea...and i was like, I wanna watch Gone with the Wind and my friend, Alexis was like, I want pickles, and my other BFF, Emily, was like, I want hot fudge. So we all watched gone with the wind, Alexis ate a whole jar of pickles and Emily and i ate hot fudge off of spoons.
4. Moral Integrity is Overrated: Same game, Random, Alexis and all of us were at a cafe and she was like, 'Moral Integrity is Overrated!' and then she waved her arms above her head and was making a noise like "aghoogah aghoogah!" LOL. (She won that game, H2O came out Austin's nose and almost hit a pigeon)
5. The whole, My body looks good thing and you know you want some. Yea. Me + Austin. It gets really personal so i'll stop there or else you'll think i'm a whore or something which i'm not. It was just because Austin was being ignorant and stupid.
6. Take me out for ice cream: Emily likes ice cream. So she asks Alexis to take her out for ice cream all the time and now we just randomly ask her if she wants ice cream because she was annoying. Luv ya.
7. (Or I guess 6.5) Edward makes a peace sign + lots of people do that, but this one time, i was motioning to my other friend, Adam, and he did like a gangster peace sign and i meant to imitate him but instead i put out 2 gangster peace signs and leaned back and now that's our (not so secret) handshake. (NOt even 6.5. More like 6.2598001246 or somethin'.)
-Aurevior!
