Chapter 3

Nights passed and slowly, Alfred began to believe he would never be able to leave. There were times when this thought seemed crushing in its weight, and he had to fight hard in order not to fall victim to depression.

He missed his home and the familiar faces of other students. He missed the sunny summers of Königsberg and its streets that he knew like his own pockets. He even thought of the Professor's dusty study with nostalgia, and how he had sat there listening to the old man's endless lectures while watching tiny dust particles float in the air.

But here he was, far away from home, likely never to return... unless he decided his life was more valuable than Sarah Chagal's. The idea of leaving was painfully tempting and he often dreamed of running away from the castle, but in the end he always knew he would not be able to actually do it. It was clear to Alfred he wouldn't be able to live with himself if he let someone else die because of his own weakness.

Herbert had been right, though. As miserable he was, and as much he longed for his home, Alfred couldn't hate the one whose fault it was. It was crazy and didn't make any sense, but so it was. He was certain that bearing his fate here would have been easier if he could at least have hated the Count, but as much as he tried to feel loathing, he could not. As he was awful, he was enchanting. And, even if he didn't like that very much, there was truth about what the vampire had said: after all, it had been his choice to come here. In a way, it was his own mistake.

And that mistake soon had a very unexpected consequence.

The night when that thing happened, Alfred was in his own chamber and sewing a patch on the knee of his trousers. He had tripped on his way from downstairs and scratched open the knee. Being too proud, he decided not to ask Herbert or the Count for a new piece of clothing but rather try and repair his old trousers. The more childish part of him hoped it would annoy Krolock, who himself was always immaculately dressed.

When he was doing the last stitches, Herbert wandered in, humming quietly to himself.

"You could have knocked", Alfred pointed out. He did not think getting angry at the vampire's lack of manners would have had any impact.

"I could, but it's my castle", Herbert said airily and examined him. The human would have liked to argue back or point out that it was actually the Count's castle, but he had already learned it was usually waste of time to try and argue with the viscount. Somehow, Herbert always found a way to win an argument even if he was the one who had it wrong.

"Well, while you're here you could tell me what you want", Alfred said and bit off the thread, then studying his handiwork. It looked a little messy – he had never been very good at sewing – but it would do.

"Vati wants to see you. He asked me to get you", Herbert answered. The human contemplated the possibility of saying no for a moment, but decided against it. If he didn't comply, the Count would come here himself, and possibly make him regret his disobedience. So Alfred sighed and pulled on his newly fixed trousers, trying to look like he didn't notice Herbert watching him with appreciative eyes. At least he could now trust that all Herbert would do was look.

"All right then", he answered, put on his shoes and followed Herbert out. He was about to turn left and head towards the sitting room when the vampire cleared his throat.

"Wrong way, Alfred", he said with a crooked smile. The human stopped dead on his tracks and turned to look at the viscount.

"Vati is in his chambers", Herbert said, his smile widening.

Now that was unnerving. Why would the Count want to see Alfred in his own chambers? It could only mean trouble, and he gulped.

"What does he want?" he asked, trying to keep his voice even.

The way Herbert just shrugged did not console him one bit.

"You'll have to ask himself", the vampire said. "Follow me."

Herbert guided him through dark hallways until they came to a corridor Alfred wasn't sure he had seen before. He had spent a lot of time exploring the castle, but then again a lot of places here looked very similar. In any case, he thought it was the right wing of the ancient building. It was very easy to get lost in this place if one wasn't paying attention to their surroundings.

"There", Herbert pointed at a door and turned around. For a moment, the human considered asking him to come along, but then he decided against it and wanted to kick himself for being so pathetic. He was a grown-up. He could handle this.

Gathering his courage, Alfred knocked and the familiar voice called him in.

The room was spacious, with red wallpapers that were decorated with black floral patterns. The sense of space was heightened by tall windows (some of them with stained glass), adorned by curtains that were couple shades darker than the walls. A beautiful king-sized, four-postered bed made of dark wood ruled the room, although it looked like no one had slept there in a long time. That was probably true, given that the Count chose to rest in crypt. On the opposing wall, there was a great fireplace, and on its mantelpiece there lay scattered various small objects. A small hairbrush with ivory handle caught Alfred's eye – it was quite delicate and feminine to belong to an undead nobleman. Perhaps it had belonged tosome sweetheart of his in a time long ago when he had actually had a heart. There was little other furniture, all of which was made of similar dark wood as the bed: couple of comfortable-looking armchairs by the fire, a massive drawer, and a table by the bedside. Two doors were on each side of the fireplace, leading to other rooms.

The Count himself stood by the window, his back turned to Alfred. He had taken off his black coat and was wearing a loose dark shirt instead, with his long hair flowing down his shoulders.

"You asked for me?" Alfred said after shortly examining his surroundings. The vampire turned around: he had been buttoning up his shirt but hadn't finished, and the human could see a glimpse of white chest. He hadn't realized the gaunt-looking Count would appear so... toned. Thinking of that made him immediately blush.

"I did", the vampire said and a slow smile – not exactly a calming kind – spread on his face. "I wish to bite you."

Alfred froze in fear. Was this it? Was he going to get killed? And what could possibly have made the vampire make that decision now? He was terrified, yet a part of his mind was still going over last couple nights, trying to remember if he had done something to anger Krolock...

"You're going to kill me?" he squeaked, sounding much more scared than he wanted to sound. Despite everything, he didn't want to come across as a coward, or die as such. The Count smiled, but his smile did little to console the human.

"Of course not, silly boy. It only kills you if I drink you dry", he said lightly, as if he were talking about something much less severe and permanent than the possibility of Alfred's life ending.

"Well, you're going to turn me then?" the human inquired, quickly wondering if he could find a cross somewhere. Could he even get to the door before he would be caught?

"No. I'm merely going to bite you and take a little of your blood. Turning you would require much greater amount, and I have no intention of doing that now", Krolock said.

"So you're not going to kill me?" Alfred felt obliged to ask one more time.

"Of course not", the vampire reassured him.

"And... what if I say no?" the young man asked cautiously, although he wasn't sure it was wise. However, the Count merely chuckled.

"Do you actually think that is going to stop me if I truly wish to bite you? You're not going to be able to fight me, and you know that. And it will hurt much more if you try to resist, so I'd recommend you to do as I say", he said, again doing that infuriating patronizing but gentle -thing he often did when Alfred was around.

Realizing he was beaten, the human groaned.

"Fine. What do I have to do?" he asked.

"I believe you should sit on the bed. It will be more comfortable there", the vampire answered.

"If you're so concerned about my comfort, why bite me at all?" Alfred demanded before he could stop himself.

"We can do this the hard way, if you want to. It is your choice", the Count merely said with a slight lift of his eyebrows.

Sighing heavily, Alfred approached the bed and sat down after a moment of hesitation. Somehow it felt wrong to sit there, even if no one even used the bed any more. Fear was building in him despite the vampire's promise not to kill him. What if something went wrong and he ended up dead anyway?

"Now, don't look so terrified. You're not going to die", Krolock said softly as he sat beside the human. Only once before had he been so near, and thinking of that made Alfred still feel quite nervous and embarrassed.

"Promise?" he asked unhappily. He wanted to kick himself for sounding so pitiful, but he couldn't help it.

"I promise", the Count said with a small chuckle. Then he pushed Alfred's head aside and wrapped his other arm around the human to keep him steady. The young man swallowed and shut his eyes tight, hoping it would be over soon. He felt the cool breath of the vampire on his neck then and heard a sound of deep inhaling as the other one took in his scent.

"This is going to hurt a bit", the vampire whispered, so close that his lips touched Alfred's earlobe, "but you'll get used to it. Being bitten is actually very nice..."

"So you say!" Alfred winced. He was shivering and his hands had become tight fists.

"Just try to relax. It is really not that bad", Krolock said, his voice low and soothing. A long moment passed by without nothing happening and slowly, the human's racing heart started to calm down. But when he felt two fangs on his neck, it leapt again and he let out a small whimper.

Fangs penetrated his skin, and it did hurt; Alfred yelped and convulsed instinctively, but two strong arms held him still. Be calm... a voice seemed to whisper in his mind, and he would have wanted to tell that voice how very stupid it was for proposing something like that. He was breathing hard, his head was pounding and his reason was screaming to put up a fight and try to get away, for surely he would die here...

But, somehow, he was able to hold still, and after a moment he realized it didn't really hurt that much any more; there was something like a pinch, yes, but it was almost like... good hurt. He concentrated on the sucking feeling on his neck, how the vampire slowly and carefully took small sips... The arms around him rocked him gently, and Alfred could almost see what the Count had meant when he had said it could be nice.

He realized the fangs were gone now and instead there was a tongue against his skin, lapping at his neck to catch the last drops of blood. That wasn't unpleasant at all and he could finally feel his tense muscles relaxing, letting himself sink into the arms that were holding him. He was a bit dizzy and weak as if after vigorous exercise, but he was alive.

The lapping at his neck stopped after a while and Alfred opened his eyes once more. Krolock had pulled back a bit and was now studying his face intently. His mouth and teeth were stained with blood, and although that could have looked very scary, Alfred didn't feel fear.

"Well? Was it so bad?" the Count asked, his voice unexpectedly soft and friendly.

"It was awful", Alfred mumbled. He realized the vampire still hadn't let him go, and for some reason, he didn't object to that. He wasn't even sure he'd have been able to support himself without those arms anyway.

"You liar", Krolock chortled.

He fell silent then, and his eyes fixed on Alfred's. A shadow of something very strange passed in his clear blue eyes as he watched the human... his right hand moved up to the back of Alfred's head, grabbing hair gently... and then he moved closer.

This time, Alfred wasn't so astonished to have that mouth pressed against his own. It didn't take him as long to recover, and, most surprisingly of all, he didn't feel the resistance he had sworn to have if this exact thing should happen again. Maybe it was the loss of blood, or maybe he had been hypnotized somehow – it could be that drinking blood messed with your head. He didn't know.

As a matter of fact, he didn't even care.

The metallic taste was much stronger this time, and he knew it was the taste of his own blood. It actually wasn't as disgusting as the blood he had been forced to drink when he had been ill, but that might just be because he had just been fed on. Once again his heart began to race and it felt like bursting in his chest; he felt one fang nibbling gently at his lower lip and it made him shiver and moan. He was hot and cold at the same time and now, if ever, he was certain he would die from sheer sensory overload. Every sensation seemed heightened, his chest felt tight and he was so very dizzy...

Alfred was out of breath when the vampire finally pulled back. Slowly, his mind began working again and he became aware of his surroundings. At some point, his hands had risen up to rest on the sides of the Count's neck, and he felt the smooth skin under his hands and strands of silky hair brush at the back of his fingers. His heart was still pounding with no sign of slowing down, and he felt more alive than ever before this moment. And it scared him more than he could say.

Krolock stared down at him mutely, and his eyes betrayed no thought or emotion. His face could only be described as blank. For some time, he remained there, arms still around Alfred, when he suddenly shot up and stalked away. He turned his back to Alfred.

"Leave", came the curt order in a completely emotionless voice.

"But I..." Alfred began, although he didn't even know what he was going to say. The only answer he was given was Krolock's hand pointing at the door, and he understood that this time, it was better to just obey with no arguments.

Fidgeting as he went, Alfred left the room, once again completely astounded by the enigmatic, crazy and infuriating master of the castle.


Alfred didn't see Krolock next night.

He had barely slept, but rather tossed and turned restlessly, unable to push away the memories and his astonishment of what had happened in His Excellency's bedchamber. And when he remembered, a fierce blush burned his face as if he had just stumbled out of the vampire's chambers, fresh from the arms of his captor. When it became especially excruciating, he tried to think of Sarah, how it was all for her, but his mind wouldn't follow his lead that night. Rather, even the thoughts of her somehow managed to lead back to the Count.

So he was feeling exhausted yet somehow electrified the next day, and no matter how he tried, he couldn't seem to distract himself with anything. Even reading didn't help: he found himself constantly just staring at the page while thoughts were running amok in his head.

In the end, the only medicine he could think of was to find the vampire and talk of what had exactly happened. He would ask Krolock to leave him alone and not do that again. He would be very brave and forceful and tell the vampire not to mess with his head any more, because that was exactly what it was about: just to confuse him and play with his mind. But that night, when he tried to find the Count, he quickly became aware of the fact that the tall vampire was nowhere to be found. According to Koukol, the Master had gone outside almost immediately after emerging from the crypt, with no word of where he was going or when he would return.

Alfred was disappointed to hear Koukol's words; how dare the stupid vampire do this? First confuse him so profoundly and then just disappear into the night, leaving him to suffer alone! Had Krolock been around then, Alfred would have punched him right in the middle of that stupid, elegant face and told him just how stupid it all was.

But, as the vampire didn't make appearance that night, Alfred was left fuming alone.

Herbert, however, did come to him. The human knew something was wrong instantly when he saw the viscount's face: if anything managed to worry him, it had to be serious.

"What did you do to Vati?" the vampire demanded right away when he had spotted Alfred sitting on the window board.

"What?" Alfred asked in confusion. In his opinion, one should be asking what the Count had done to him, not the other way around!

"You heard what I said! What did you do to him?" Herbert exclaimed anxiously.

"I don't understand", the human said as his confusion only grew greater. Herbert seemed frustrated now, and even more so annoyed.

"Well, it has to have something to do with you, I'm sure of it! It was after he spoke with you that he began acting so strange!" Herbert said, biting absently his thumbnail.

"Please, explain what you mean", Alfred wanted to know. This was getting more and more bewildering with every moment!

"I could see something was wrong with him, with how in agony he looked – and the way he would punish that poor violin of his, it was horrifying – and then he wouldn't speak to me although he knew that I knew he wasn't all right. He barely spoke two words for me tonight and then he just left without even telling where he was going! Vati isn't like that, he doesn't keep secrets from me! He knows how I worry for him, especially when he is in pain, and then acts like this..." Herbert babbled on, sounding just a bit panicked. Then his eyes focused on Alfred again. "Tell me! What did you do?"

"I did nothing! I just... well, I did as he told me to do, nothing else!" Alfred defended himself quickly.

"Then what was it?" the viscount asked anxiously.

"I... he just wanted to bite me", the human said and exposed two small puncture wounds on his neck. It wasn't lying, was it, if he didn't tell the whole truth? Because there was no way he could actually tell the full story of what had happened.

"Did he say anything? No, did you say anything to him?" Herbert asked, staring at the wounds as if the answer was somehow hidden in them.

"I didn't", Alfred said quietly. Luckily, the vampire didn't seem to notice that he had omitted a part of the truth. Really, it wasn't something he wanted to say out loud, and least of all, to Herbert. Just thinking of what had happened made him so very embarrassed that he didn't want to wonder how it would feel like if he was to speak of it to someone like the viscount. Herbert would laugh or be condescending or something else equally embarrassing, and Alfred had no idea of how you even confessed to having kissed another man?

The vampire stroke his chin thoughtfully, still wearing a concerned look on his face.

"Fine then. But if he says anything to you about what is going on, you need to come and tell me immediately", Herbert finally said and left without another word. Only when he was gone, Alfred let out a breath he had been holding without realizing it himself.

Pulling his knees against his chest, he closed his eyes and tried to calm his mind. He took deep, long breaths, just concentrating on how it felt, air expanding his lungs... but like for ever since the scene in the Count's chambers, he wasn't able to hold that emptiness of mind for long.

The kiss in the graveyard had been... it was exactly what he had thought it to be: just another way the vampire could make him feel beaten and confused. A mind game, pure and simple.

But last night? If Herbert's words confirmed something, it was that something else had happened this time. Maybe Krolock had at first meant to manipulate him in yet another way, but that kiss... it hadn't been a mind game. Or, if it was, this time he had fallen into his own trap too.

That kiss had been something strong enough to even throw the vampire himself off balance.

Absentmindedly, Alfred traced his lips and felt a tightening deep in his stomach. It made him shiver and he let out a shaky breath. He quickly put his hand down, as if it were burned and leaned his forehead against the cool surface of the window glass, once again fighting to clear his mind.

Something was happening to him, and he wasn't sure it was good.