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Here's the new chapter of Helplessness. Forgive me for any mistakes. More Thorough.


Standing outside the ICU, Eric watched through the glass as the silent conversation between Horatio and Natalia was taking place. He was able, with help of the rest of the team, to finally convince the doctor to agree to this visit. In a wheelchair, with a nurse and ten minutes tops, but here they were. Horatio looked like he was about to pass out, but he was determined to say what he had to say to Natalia. He said that he wouldn't be able to forgive himself if he hadn't apologized for what happened. Not that he would ever forgive himself. But Eric was willing to help Horatio with whatever he wanted to do. Looking down at the now cold cup of coffee in his hand, he remembered the first time he was standing in the almost same spot. Two days ago, when Horatio and Natalia were situated in the ICU, one of them after surgery, other in a coma, both very hard fighting for their lives…

They were all there. Eric, Calleigh, Frank, Ryan and Walter, all waiting for hours for any information they could get, gathered in a small waiting room on a surgical floor of Mercy Hospital. None of them could believe what was happening. Not only did Horatio get shot but also Natalia almost drowned in that car. There was still no word on any of them. But sometimes no news is good news. It meant that they were still alive, still fighting. Eric stood up from an uncomfortable plastic chair and started pacing, giving up trying to stay calm. He looked at the rest of the team – they were either sitting down, heads resting in their hands or fidgeting anxiously, worry visible all over their faces. It was all they could do – wait. So they did. It was maybe another hour when they saw a doctor approach them, some of the blood still visible on his scrubs.

"Who is here for Horatio Caine?" asked the doctor and they instantly were standing in front of him.

"How is he?" asked quickly Eric, afraid of what they were about to hear.

"Lieutenant Caine suffered a gunshot wound to the abdomen, as you probably already know. The blood loss was significant. When he got here, we were able to stabilize him enough to get him to surgery, but we lost him a couple of times in the operating room."

"Is he alive?" muttered Calleigh, who was sobbing openly at the doctor's words.

"Yes, he is," said the doctor with a hesitance in his voice "But his condition is critical. As I said, he's lost a lot of blood. We were able to do the transfusion, but he's not out of the woods yet. The bullet not only nicked his liver but also tore one of the abdominal arteries, hence so severe bleeding. We managed to get the bullet out and finally stop the bleeding, but there's no way of knowing right now if his condition won't deteriorate. Next twenty-four hours are critical. We hope that if he gets through this period, he would make a complete recovery. As for now, there's nothing we can do but wait."

"What about Natalia?" asked Ryan, after a few moments of stunned silence.

"Ah, Miss Boa Vista? Yes, I heard they were brought together. I am not one of her doctors, but I can find someone who has more information. All I know is that she was severely hypothermic at the admission but they were able to warm her up and her heart is now beating."

"Now? You mean she was… There wasn't…" Ryan, as well as the rest of them, was shocked beyond words.

"I'm afraid so. But please, wait for her doctor, he will explain it all to you." With that the doctor disappeared from their sight, only to be replaced by another one, who without unnecessary introductions proceeded to answering their unasked questions.

"Miss Boa Vista is stable but as for now in a coma. As I was told you were all informed that she was in a state called hypothermia, which means that her core temperature was well below normal. She had no pulse for an hour and the cold helped to prevent organ and brain damage. Luckily, when we warmed her up, we managed to restart her heart." Doctor stopped for a while to let the people in front of him digest the news.

"Will she be okay?" It was Frank's turn to ask the question.

"We hope so. We did some tests and we didn't find anything that could cause our concern. There is still possibility of brain damage, but until she wakes up there's no way of knowing that. We just have to wait and see."

"What kind of damage are we talking about?"

"As I said – we don't know yet if there will be any. Let's focus for now on getting her out of that coma."

None of them tried to press Natalia's doctor for more information. Maybe the tests were accurate and Natalia will be just fine. Unfortunately they now had to wait not only for Natalia but for Horatio as well. Hard days were ahead of the CSIs.

"Can we see them?" asked Eric, after a moment of silence.

"By them you probably also mean Lieutenant Caine, am I right? I was advised to take all of you to both of them. Please, follow me."

And now, Eric stood in the same place they all were standing then and watching both of their friends fighting for their lives. He remembered a lot of medical equipment, surrounding Natalia and Horatio, who were lying so still in their hospital beds. Too still. After a while it was discovered that Horatio was developing some kind of infection from his gunshot wound so he had to be moved to another room. They got through the twenty-four hour period without any other serious complications and the doctors were fairly optimistic. Horatio woke up not long after that, Natalia still being in a coma, and here they were. Eric was looking at the red-haired man, who long ago became his boss and friend, clutching tightly Natalia's hand, mainly silently sitting beside her bed or whispering sometimes a word or two. Nurse, who was inside with Horatio, announced that the time was up and he had to return to his room. Horatio, without even trying to put up a fight, gave Natalia's hand one more squeeze and gave a barely noticeable nod. In a few seconds, he was being wheeled out of the ICU cubicle and Eric had to try very hard not to notice the tears that were visible on Horatio's face. Eric understood. There was nothing they could do. They had to wait. And Eric knew that in this situation Horatio, just like himself, simply felt helpless.