Jay ended up at Spinner and Emma's that night, since he didn't live here anymore. Spinner flopped himself on the couch like a potatoe and watched the football game with a beer in his hands, and already fast asleep as it was blasting the games moves and cheers.
Emma scoffed, standing in the kitchen and washing the rest of the dishes, knowing Spinner had the game on and could hear it all the way in there.
Jay rubbed his chin, opening the fridge and has snuck into the kitchen unnoticed. He watched Emma throw the last dish into the dryer, and watched her sigh, leaning on the kitchen counter just having a moment to herself.
He clenched his jaw, and opened the beer can, hoping she'd hear and maybe wanna talk about it. He could tell something was wrong.
Emma gasped and turned and laughed a little, "Didn't hear you." she admitted, and watched him raise his eyebrows, nodding because he could tell, "Just..tired.." she coughed awkwardly, lying.
"Tired?" taunted Jay, walking to her back door to their back yard and glanced back at her, and to the tv room Spinner was passed out in.
After some thought, she watched him nod out towards the backyard, insisting she follow, and he closed the door behind him, waiting for her to come out
Emma exhaled the breath she didn't think she was holding and she jumped when she bumped in the dish holder behind her and tried to control herself. What was she doing? He JUST wanted to talk, it was innocent, it was JAY.
With that thought, Emma grabbed a beer herself and went outside. She was going to need a drink too..
Jay chuckled softly as he sat on her back porch steps and she came to sit beside, her blonde hair glowing in the moon light as she had trouble opening her beer can.
He took it, and was still smirking at he opened it and passed it back to her.
She gave a playful glare and took a deep breath, "So.." she drifts and eyes him watching the sky as he sipped his beer, "How are you?" was he upset? About the Manny thing...I mean, Emma was sure he loved her.. why else would he of moved to Hollywood and then married her?
Jay could tell you why! Cause there was nothing left for him back in Degrassi anymore, maybe his job, but once the girl of his dreams got married.. why stick around ?
So truth was out.. maybe all this time he was in love with Emma still. I mean look at her, she was perfect..wouldn't you still be too?
"I'm great." sighed Jay, leaving Emma wondering if he meant it or was being the saracastic ass.
Emma looked down at her drink and shrugged, "Probably sucked having to see her with someone else."
"Felt worse." taunted Jay but was being brutally honest and Emma stared at him for that.
"You don't feel bad? Betrayed?" Emma asked him.
He turned his head and connected eyes with her, "Living in Hollywood, Emma.. was as fake as Manny's and I's marriage. I guess you wouldn't get that with this wonderful life?" he seemed to snap and tried to cover the bitter up.
Emma's mouth fell a bit and she looked back at her house. Did he think this was PARADISE? Did he think she was HAPPY?!
"Spinner is.." Emma drifted off, shaking her head, "Inside passed out with a beer in his hand and drooling. That's what I come home to every day." she snapped back at him.
Jay looked down, but then tried to hide his smirk, and as it turned into a grin Emma felt a laugh slipping from her lips too.
"ugh." EMma said, shaking her head and smiling, giggling a little and listening to Jay laugh.
"that is pretty fucking horrible." Jay admitted, glancing back at the house after her. Way for Spin to kill the romance.. where was the fire? Jay swore if Emma was his, the fire would never die out... and this was living proof.
He cornered his eyes to sneak a glance at her, sizing her up and down as she shy like giggled, sipping her beer and sighed.
"Life sucks." she commented.
He raised an eyebrow, impressed she admitted that out loud.
"So what?" he said a bit too curiously, "Emma Nelson's marriage life isn't the FairyTale it was meant to be?" he asked.
He shouldn't be too quick to judge..maybe behind closed doors Spinner really did add fuel to the fire... then Jay clenched his jaw, not wanting to picture Emma with another guy.. even if it was her husband .. it made his skin crawl.
Emma seemed lost in thought and she looked back up into his grey eyes as he stared closely at her for a real answer.
He ALWAYS knew when she was lying.. maybe cause he use to be a good liar himself, and then there was the time they lied together before...to be together.
"Doesn't matter." Emma insisted, looking back down, "What's done is done, he's mine..I'm his." she gloomily looked down at the ring on her finger.
Really? That was her answer? Jay couldn't take that, and he had to snicker out loud which made her glare a little. Jerk
"Tell that to Manny then cause I think she found a way out." he chuckled and chugged his beer bottle wth another snicker after he swallowed.
He looked back at her to find her glaring, "Some couples think it's worth fighting for their love." snapped Emma.
Okay, maybe she was talking bullshit and her and Spinner weren't trying to fight for anything.. but maybe she was getting angry because she wished in real life, there was a real love like that, that made a man fight for his love.
Where was that kind of love?
Why.. it was sitting beside her.
Jay squinted his eyes at her, almost jealously, "Oh yea?" he taunts, turning fully toward her, "Is Spinner one of those? Cause not once have I even seen him open a door for you yet, or kiss you goodnight, or even say I love you."
His words hurt, because they were true, and it made her see just how horrible her marriage was and how badly she felt she wanted Jay right now. God! Why'd he always do this?! Confuse her heart to the point it even hurt.
"Just cause your marriage isn't working doesn't mean you can come ruin mine." Emma angered, standing up and he threw his beer bottle, standing up too as it smashed on the concrete.
"Seems pretty ruined already! He doesn't even see you, Emma!" Jay yelled at her, upset himself and looked desperately at her, hoping she saw that too.
She was too busy confusing his jealousy with just wanting her unhappy like he was though..Misery loved company right? No. . all he wanted was her not to be in this mistake marriage like he was.. too see even he would be better for her.
Jay's eyes lit.
That was it. HE would even be better for her.. he'd spoil her, make her laugh, never make her do the dishes..
Emma was looking angerily at him, but saw how his eyes twinkled looking at her and her heart skipped. Jesus, that look.. Emma had no idea if he knew he gave her that look for a reason or not but it always made her heart skip and knees weak. Listen to her, she sounded like a stupid highschool girl all over again?
Emma couldn't breath under his stare, and her heart started to pound at the conversation they were ACTUALLY having and how fast Jay could tell she was unhappy.. faster than even Spinner ever could.
"I'm going to be bed." she muttered and tried to escape but gasped when Jay put his hand on the door, not letting her goo and her eyes slowly looked up at his.
He had that smoldering look, his lips shut, but his grey eyes saying it all, piercing through her with want and something more that she couldn't quite make out. She remembered this look.. the way he looked at her like a hungry wolf. Her heart stopped when he stepped even closer to her and hung his head, eyes still staring into hers, she bit her lower lip.
Emma's mouth hung a bit as his hand slowly raised up on her hip, then his other hand on her other side of her hip and she lowered her head. He nervously licked his lips and swallowed, not beliving he was trying this with his friends WIFE, but this was EMMA, she was suppose to be HIS Emma. . and she wasn't. It just wasn't right.
He lifted her chin and moved his head down a bit, hearing her small gasp but she didn't pull away and even stared at his lips too as she finally closed her eyes and he closed his shut too, capturing her lips in between his and kissing her deeply, and tenderly, sighing into her mouth and couldn't believe they were doing this. His heart went wild, reminded him back when it did the first time he kissed her.. that kiss was so new, and innocent and this one was just as exciting but more filled with passion and need..guess that would happen over losing time with another for years. Her fingers entangled into his hair and she let her mouth open slightly, teasing her tounge against his once or twice til going back to the deep soft kisses
"stop!" Emma suddenly pushed away, covering her mouth and her heart beating so fast that she even put a hand on her chest and she was breathless.
He panted and looked at her sad like, like a sad puppy who just wanted it's beloved Toy back and showed a sign of begging through his eyes.
"You can't do this to me!" Emma shoved him and his mouth dropped.
Do WHAT to her?! Love her? Couldn't really stop...
"I'm married!" Emma raised her hand to show her ring. She wasn't the cheating type, she hated the feeling and she couldnt believe he would do this to her again. Make her feel like the bad girl. NOW!? Why? Might of been an amazing kiss but it hurt her too much at the same time.
Jay looked away, feeling abit guilty but also showing he might not care. Spin didn't deserve Emma. . and maybe he didn't but he just knew he'd try to give her EVERYTHING she wanted.. so that had to be something!
She looked away from him, "Maybe...12 years ago there would of been a chance but now?" Emma began to cry and his shoulders fell, sadly watching the tears drop from her eyes, "You can't just play with me like you use to Jay"
"I-" Jay shook his head no, trying to explain he NEVER played with her, but she wouldn't let him explain..
She snapped at him, "This isn't highschool! I'm someones wife now and you married my best friend.." she looked so hurt as she remembered that, "a-and I want to be a mother soon and.." Emma cried harder, trying to stop and ran her fingers through her hair, glaring at him with tears in her eyes, he was messing everything up! And little babies with Jay heads were crowding her thoughts right now.
Jay felt horrible, and it took a lot to make him feel bad, but he always had the weak spot for Emma, she always turned him human. Maybe it WAS best he left her alone.. but he just couldn't, and his face turned from upset, to mad.
"Tell me you love him." Jay snapped at her.
Emma's eyes widen and her mouth fell, snickering as she looked away from his eyes. L-love her own..husband? She could say that, easily, she could, she could. She opened her mouth, yet found herself choked up and not being able to look back into his eyes.
"I don't have to tell you anything!" she finally spat, and shook her head at him madly, "Not like you could ever say you loved me so-" she shut up, feeling a little embarressed that she may of shown she might of wanted him to..
She then went serious, seeing his piercing eyes show no sign of agreeing with her. He looked at her, very sure like and nodded slowly that he COULD say it, and showing just how much love he had hidden in him for her and she went into shock.
No.
No that'd mean he wasted . ..ALL these years..
"How could you say that?!" she went to shove him and he caught her wrists and she yelled again, "How could you hide that from me!?"
"You were with Sean, chris, back to Sean, Me, Sean, Spinner then MARRIED!" Jay yelled back at her and she stopped struggling in his hands, "How could I!?" he shouted, his face almost red.
she didn't think this ate up at him? More than she could ever know!
Emma couldn't believe this, she just couldn't, for her own sanity. And what about him!? Girl to girl as well! Alex, random, Alex, amy, random, Alex, Amy, her, alex, stripper, MANNY! It was his fault too!
"can we just.." he sadly tried to reach for her hand, "Talk."
She backed away from him like fire.
"It's too late." her voice cracked, heart breaking, "How could you do this". .. They could of been.. happy.
Jay's mouth fell and watched her leave, closing the door behind her and his eyes scanned to the ground, trying to pick his mouth up and was hating himself for this too.
He sat down back on steps, and put his head into his hands. He then shot up and grabbed the beer she didn't drink much, and downed it, miserable with himself and wanting to just end his life right now before he fucked anything more up.
He went back in around midnight, grabbed the rest of the beer, and drank in the back yard.
"Dude." he heard, waking up and the sun shining horribly into his eye, "Air-poort." Spinner said through his hands near his mouth, sounding like an announcement.
Jay groaned, feeling the hangover wash over him and stood up, feeling like crap. Then felt even more like shit remembering what happened with Emma lastnight.
"Lets go!" Spinner cheered, bringing him over to the driveway.
Jay rubbed the back of his head, sadly glancing at the house and knowing Emma was in it. He sighed, shaking his head and hating his life again as he walked to Spinners car.
"Niagara falls?" Sean asked the guys, standing with them at the airport infront of the gate.
"Yea man!" Spinner cheered, putting an arm over Jay, "Last time we went ruled! Gambled, got drunk, got money, got bitches-"
"Got hitched." Jay reminded tauntingly and glared at him for calling Emma his 'bitch'.
Spinner looked at Sean, shrugging, "That's true I did.."
Before Sean let Spinner have the time to look regretful, he taunted him, "Hmm, maybe I'll go then and then maybe I'll too get someone whose too good for me, trick her into marrying me, and does all the work around the house and I can just kick back and take it easy."
Jay smirked, giving Sean an approving nod, that summed it up.
Spinner scowled, "Emma doesn't do ALL the work, and she's lucky to have me! I'm...funny, and a good cook."
Sean and Jay just rolled their eye and led him to the gate as the plane started to board, "Let's just do this." taunts Sean, but was ready for a night of drinking with his boys.
I love bad b*tches, that's my f*ckin problem
And yeah I like to f*ck I got a f*ckin problem
I love bad b*tches, that's my f*ckin problem
(Fuckin problem-drake)
