Hi guys. It's been a while, but I've been taking time to make sure I was happy with this next chapter. I hope you enjoy a little more angst (it only make the end of the story more satisfying for me, so I hope I'm not the only one)! It's always great to hear what you think, positive or not and it's always a great motivator, so do review if you have time to let me know what you think of the story so far. Thanks again! :)
...
Chapter Three
Louis shifted again in his seat and Jessica, frustrated with his fidgeting, shot him a look. He was nervous, both looking forward to and dreading this afternoon in equal measure and his anxiety was filling the atmosphere of the small room they found themselves sitting in. For Louis, it seemed as though they'd been in there for hours, rather than minutes.
"What do we say to her, Jessica?" His voice was quiet, while his eyes focussed on his hands, lying flat on the table in front of him. Jessica wasn't entirely sure how to respond. The situation they were in was unprecedented and had knocked them all off their games, but before she could formulate an answer the door to the small room opened and Donna stepped inside, past the guard who had escorted her, who shut the door firmly behind her.
For a moment there was silence, all three not quite sure what to say in such a horribly surreal scenario. Donna, her hair tied up in a ponytail and dressed in khaki trousers and open shirt, underneath which was a white vest top, took a breath and walked to the chair across from her two friends and sat down, her hands folding in to her lap. Seeing them was harder then she'd expected, as feelings of shame and embarrassment washed over her.
"Hi Donna," Louis practically whispered, focussing all his energy on not breaking down in front of her.
She smiled gently, biting her bottom lip. "Hi." There hadn't been many times in her life when Donna had been lost for conversation, but words deserted her.
Sensing the emotions running high around her, Jessica gave her a smile. "How are you Donna?" Her friend's eyes met hers and she sighed. "I'm okay. Could be worse. I'm not in orange anymore."
Jessica gave her a small supportive nod. "We're looking over your case again to see if there are any grounds for appeal, as well as what other cards we can play."
"You mean some kind of deal?"
Nodding, Jessica set out their current thoughts on possible options. "We're covering all angles. How much do you know about the other women in your block?"
Donna noted Jessica's use of the word "women" rather than "inmates" and was grateful; it softened her shame just a little. "Not much yet. It's been a bit of an adjustment. Other than Marie, my cellmate, I'm just keeping my head down."
"We're looking in to everybody in here, so anything you need to know, we'll tell you."
"You mean, who to keep away from? I think I'm already starting to work that out for myself," Donna commented, remembering the less than friendly encounter the night before. She noticed the worry etched across Louis's face and she offered him a smile. "I'm okay, Louis."
He smiled in return, but Donna noticed that it didn't reach his eyes. "We brought you some things," he replied quietly, forcing a warm smile on to his face. "It's not much. The ridiculous rules wouldn't let us bring more."
He passed her a bag and she peered inside to find basic toiletries and essentials. "Rachel bought everything."
Donna smiled at the gesture. "We've also started the process for setting up your account and will put the maximum amount of money we can in it. You can use it for the phone and….I…..I think there's a shop."
"There is. Marie told me. Thank you and thank Rachel for me."
As the conversation moved forward, Jessica took the lead, sensing how much Louis was struggling with the circumstances. On hearing the decision that Mike was not going to be on her attorney list, Donna pictured his reaction. She couldn't imagine that had gone down well at all.
When their time started to run out Jessica promised to set up regular meetings, subject to Donna's wishes. They were dancing around the subject of Harvey and Donna knew it. Seeing them had been hard enough. She couldn't imagine how much harder it would have been seeing Harvey and yet she still ached to see him too. Knowing her friends had no intention of bringing him up, she took a breath and looked to Jessica.
"How is he?"
"He's as good as he can be."
Jessica's answer was neutral, but Donna knew better than anyone how hurt Harvey would be; how she'd hurt him. "I just needed some time," she murmured, her eyes dropping to her hands.
"I know, but burdening yourself with needing to be strong for him, as well as yourself, may not be the best approach. He wants to be here for you."
"I know." Her response was a whisper.
"You should call him if that's easier. When you're ready."
Donna had no idea what would make this awful situation easier, but she knew it was unfair to Harvey to keep him at arm's length. Sensing the uncomfortable atmosphere and knowing they only had a few minutes left, he changed the subject. "I brought you something else."
With that he placed a large book on the table and pushed it across to Donna. She knew what it was by its size, but the thought behind the gift brought tears to her eyes, as she opened the complete works of Shakespeare.
"They have rules on the number of books, but technically that's just one….so…"
"It's wonderful. Thank you Louis. I'll treasure it." Turning to the contents page, she noticed something else and looked up at her friend, who gave her a smile.
Turning it over, she touched the photograph in front of her and smiled, as the memories of it being taken washed over her; one of the firm's parties in the early days, the four of them smiling for the camera. If she remembered correctly, Louis had this same photo in his office and the gesture of him bringing it for her caused a lump to rise in her throat and she swallowed, blinking several times to stem the rising tide of emotions within her.
"Thank you," she whispered, her eyes eventually meeting his, to find them equally glassy with unshed tears. "We'll get you out of here," he replied simply.
Jessica was the one to acknowledge their need to leave and as they stood, she gave Donna's hand a squeeze. "If you need us, call. Anytime."
"I will."
Louis hesitated for a split second before pulling her in to a hug, clinging on for dear life; an embrace she was more than happy to receive, taking comfort in the warmth of her friend for a few all too brief moments.
"I'll see you soon, okay?"
Donna nodded as the door opened and the same guard arrived to escort her back to the block. This was the moment she'd been dreading and was a moment she had known would have been unbearable had Harvey been there; having to leave to go back to her cell.
By the time she found herself sitting on her bed she honestly had no idea how she'd found the strength not to crack until then. Marie sensed her need for what little privacy was on offer and disappeared in to the communal area; Donna's quiet sobs filling their small cell as she left.
…..
Rachel was staring at the screen of her computer, reading the same paragraph over and over again. The brief was important and Louis needed it to be ready by the end of the day and she had work for class, but her concentration had deserted her hours ago. She was so distracted by her thoughts that she didn't register Mike's presence until his hand touched her shoulder.
"Need any help?"
Startled, she looked up. "No, I'm fine. Just a little distracted."
He nodded. He'd been having a similar afternoon, his thoughts drifting a few miles north to Danbury, wondering how the meeting was going.
"Have you checked on Harvey?"
"No," Mike responded with a sigh, as he leant against her desk, facing her. "He'll know that's what I'm doing and it'll only piss him off. He's angry enough right now."
Rachel's hand found his, the comfort of his touch now more important than ever. "Do you think we'll find it? A way out for her?"
She watched the uncertainty cross Mike's face. "We have to Rach. There's no other option."
…
The sun was falling lower in the sky, as the afternoon succumbed to evening and the office was the last place Louis wanted to return to. Going home, turning off the lights and closing the curtains to the world was a much more appealing proposition, but it was a luxury they couldn't afford.
Instead, he found himself sinking down on his office couch, as a deep sigh left him. Sitting forward, he massaged his forehead with his fingers, desperately trying to relieve the headache that had been coming on all day. Everything was a mess and he had no idea how they were going to find a way out.
"Louis?"
The sound of Harvey's voice in the doorway took him by surprise. He'd intended to go and speak to him, but hadn't expected his friend to come to him, especially not after the way he'd carried on in yesterday's meeting.
On looking up, the sight of Harvey startled him. Same impeccable suit; yet, he looked older, as if he'd lost weight and gained years overnight, transforming him in to a shadow of his usual self. Louis had never seen someone look so lost.
"Harvey."
The word came out as a sigh and seeing his friend had nothing else to add as a greeting, he moved forward in to the office, before joining him on the couch. So many questions were swirling through Harvey's head that he didn't have any idea where to begin. Thankfully Louis took pity on him.
"She's okay. She said she's doing okay."
Their eyes met, each suffering the loss of the remarkable woman who'd become so important to them over the years. "You believe her?"
The scepticism in Harvey's voice was clear despite his quiet tone and Louis sighed. "I think she's doing the best she can."
Harvey nodded; his head dropping forward, as if the weight of the pain, loss and guilt he was carrying was resting across his shoulders. He shook his head, closing his eyes. "You know I'd swap myself for her in a heartbeat."
"I know, Harvey."
Images of her in the courtroom replayed across his mind, her hand in his so briefly he wondered if it had even happened.
"She asked how you were," Louis added quietly, to which Harvey let out a pained laugh. "Me? She's the one in prison and that's what she's asking?!"
Louis sighed. "What can I say? You're a complicated pair. Yet people think I'm the strange one around here."
It was the first genuine smile to cross Harvey's face in recent days. "We're all a little strange around here Louis. It's what makes this place one of a kind."
They sat in silence for a few minutes, neither knowing quite what to say, content to simply share the quiet space with a friend.
"I'm sorry about yesterday, Harvey. I went too far."
Harvey smiled sadly. "It's okay, Louis. You're angry. I get that." His friend turned more towards him on the couch. "You did all you could. I know that and so does Donna."
Having leant forward, Harvey looked to the floor, shaking his head. "Why did she have to try and save the day?"
"She was trying to be like you. She wanted to make a difference."
Harvey didn't respond, lost in his own frustration. They could have avoided this whole mess had she just talked to him. His mind wandered to what she'd be doing, the constant worry that he'd be receiving a call saying something had happened taking centre stage in his thoughts. He'd never craved anything as much as the need he had to be with her. Yet, it terrified him, facing her, especially with no clear way to solve everything. He'd failed once. He couldn't fail again.
His inner turmoil was clear to Louis, who stood up decisively. "Come on. I'll buy you dinner. You look like you've forgotten what food is."
"I need to work, Louis."
Letting out a frustrated sigh, Louis fixed him with a pointed look. "You need to eat. We can talk through options. Find a path forward."
Harvey gave a small nod. He hadn't eaten all day and if he was honest with himself, he didn't particularly want to be alone. "Okay Louis. Thanks."
Satisfied with his small victory, Louis moved toward the door, as Harvey pulled himself to his feet to follow, his mind and heart still with Donna.
…
"How are you doing?"
They were walking back towards their cell later that evening when Marie asked the question. She remembered how hard these early days had been for her and she wanted to try and put Donna at ease. She didn't have friends in Danbury and Donna was someone she felt a connection with. They'd reached the cell and Donna let out a sigh, as they reached the small space and sat down side-by-side on her bed.
"Today was hard. I knew it would be, but….it was really hard."
Marie nodded. "I don't have many visitors here, but my mom sometimes comes. It's still difficult for her, so she doesn't visit much."
"I'm sorry."
Her newest friend smiled. "It's okay. I miss her, but it's….my family's…complicated…."
The comment peaked Donna's interest as she realised she still knew almost nothing about the young girl next to her. "Complicated relationships aren't necessarily a bad thing, Marie."
"Maybe," she replied quietly with a shake of her head, before diverting the conversation back towards Donna with a tilt of her head. "I'm guessing you have your own complicated relationship too?"
The deflection made Donna chuckle. "Don't think that move got past me, Marie." She raised her eyebrow knowingly as they shared a smile.
"You want to talk about him?"
The question was sincere and serious and Donna felt grateful for the kindness someone who didn't even know her was willing to offer. She looked across at the Shakespeare on her table. "Another time?"
Marie slipped off her bed and on to her own. "Sure."
Pushing herself backwards until her back rested against the bare wall, Donna reached for the book, resting it on her lap. The simple gesture of this gift from Louis had meant a great deal to her, but it was what lay inside that she needed most in that moment.
The photograph stared up at her and she closed her eyes briefly, drawing in a shaky breath. Picking it up delicately, as if it were made of glass, she let her fingers glide over it, resting briefly over the person she couldn't stop thinking about.
Turning it over, she re-read Louis's words of comfort, drawing strength from them.
- We're family and we're with you. x
…
That's all for now. I'm looking forward to knowing what you all think!