Standard disclaimers apply.

Perfectly arranged marriage

"I won't do it! You guys have to help me!" Toph raged through the Fire Lord's private study, deforming the tiles of the floor and remolding a few priceless antique statues. The Greatest Earthbender in the World was no less hotheaded at 16 than she had been at 12, and no better at hiding her displeasure. "When I went back to my parents, they said they would respect me and stop treating me like a baby, and now this!"

"Well, technically, marrying you off is pretty much the opposite of treating you like a baby," Sokka put in from his relaxed seat on the window ledge. "Unless Earth Kingdom rules on that are really creepy."

"Shut up, Snoozles!" The window ledge suddenly became a lot more pointy. "You know what I mean! I want to make my own choices, live my own life, and not get married to some Fire Nation noble in an effort to demonstrate unity and let my parents see me coddled for life!"

"It's okay Toph, Sokka just has no idea how lucky he was to be born a peasant." Zuko patted the still tiny young woman awkwardly on the arm. "He thinks it should be all about who you're in love with, and anyone with a different idea can be ignored."

She slumped against him. "Well yeah lucky him, he fell in love with you and you both ignore anyone who doesn't like how closely your 'personal bodyguard' is guarding your body." She noticed Snoozles get tense and a little angry and Zuko slump in defeat, but was too wrapped up in her own problems to care. "But I can't do this! I can't marry some guy I've never met, and be a little flower of a wife, and besides it... it's humiliating!"

"How is it humiliating?" Sokka had found a new lounging spot, picking one made of wood this time to reduce the chances of being spiked. "Isn't chosen being a compliment, if nothing else?"

"I wasn't even chosen! I've been chosen as a 'candidate'! Like my family isn't good enough to make a full arrangement, they're willing to offer me as an option for some stuck up bastard to choose from because Fire Nation gets the best of the Earth Kingdom but I should be grateful just to be considered?"

"Wait-"

"-What?" Both men sat stark upright and stared at each other over their exclamations. Zuko continued. "Toph, what exactly is the arrangement your parents made?"

"King Bumi somehow convinced them to send me here for some sort of humiliating cattle call so some Fire Nation noble could pick a wife from among the Earth Kingdom. Apparently he's too good to get the full arrangement treatment and gets a selection to choose from. There's some sort of party for the Solstice, but I convinced my parents to let me come early because I figured you guys could get me out of this somehow." She stopped ranting as she listened to their heartbeats. They were... shocked? Confused? Um, becoming ecstatic?

"Toph, there's..." Sokka stumbled over his words. "There's this thing Zuko has to do, the advisors kinda rammed it down our throats..."

"What are you talking about, Snoozles?"

Zuko gave a strangled cough. "My advisors have been harassing me for years to get married, Toph. I've put them off with excuses that I don't want an arranged marriage like my parents have, but they know it's really because of Sokka, and they finally proposed that we have some sort of bizarre 'engagement party' with a bunch of acceptable marriage candidates, and that way I get to choose who I marry."

Toph gaped. She shouldn't have needed the extra information, but turned her sightless eyes towards Sokka anyway.

"Yeah, it's on the Solstice."

She gave a strangled cough of her own. "Are you telling me I'm on the short list to marry Sparky?"

"I'm not sure how short it is, but... yeah."

"So... I'd be living here with you two, helping with whatever rebellions and problems you're always complaining about, and occasionally banging Zuko in the hopes of getting some heirs?"

It was one of those moments when Toph wished she could see, because she was sure the color and expression on the Fire Lord's face would be way better than just his heartbeat and strangled breathing. Sokka, on the other hand was probably grinning ear to ear. "Essentially, yup."

"And watching you two make out when no courtiers are around?"

"If you want."

"Wood flooring," Zuko mumbled in mortification. "Gotta get thick wood flooring for the bedroom..."

Toph considered for just a moment then turned to the Fire Lord. "Do I get to bang Sokka once in a while, too?"

"Why are you asking him?" The water tribesman objected, but she could already sense Zuko nodding.

"Well only 'bang him' bang him when you're already pregnant, otherwise, at least one of you has to have pants on at all times."

"Okay, guys, you've got yourself a wife!"

A/N : While none of my official favorites have updated lately, there's been some decent Toko love going on, so I was inspired to some Tozukka. I pretty much picked my own trope this time. The story also matches Heir Club For Men fairly well.

A/N2 : While Jetzukka is my 'sexytimes' OT3 (because... well, yeah. *nosebleeds*), Tozukka is totally and completely my 'long term relationship/Zuko needs an heir' OT3. She's noble enough to make the advisors happy, they get to have wacky adventures together, she's a good enough friend to respect their relationship and she gets both of her canon crushes. Tozukka FOREVER!