Being home isn't a solution.

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Ahsoka peers through the frosted glass window of her Master's room in the Halls of Healing, trying to get even just a glimpse of him. She knows he came out of the bacta tank today, Obi-Wan had told her that much, at least. Still, she hasn't been allowed to visit, and has been told in no uncertain terms by Vokara Che that her presence is unnecessary. Well, Anakin is her Master, so she's pretty sure her presence is very necessary. Why is Anakin allowed to hang around here when Obi-Wan is sick or injured and she isn't?

The door slides open and Ahsoka jumps away, not wanting another lecture on attachment. Instead of Vokara Che, though, it's Obi-Wan, lips pressed together, arms folded in the sleeves of his cloak. "I suppose it's pointless to try and keep you away," he comments.

She nods once, crisply. She is her Master's Padawan, after all. "How is he?" she asks, edging towards the door and trying not to be obvious about it.

"Physically he's fine. The bacta did its job." Obi-Wan folds himself into his cloak a bit more and adds, "Mentally, he has some ways to go. The Mind Healers say they should be able to help, though." He doesn't sound confident. "Ahsoka... The reason you haven't been allowed to see him..." A hand appears from the fabric to rub his beard. "He isn't entirely in touch with reality, and some of what he is saying may be disturbing for you to hear."

She squares her shoulders and juts her chin up. "It's okay," she proclaims. "I need to be with him." Just as he would be there for her, or Obi-Wan, or anyone else he cares about.

Obi-Wan sighs, but gestures towards the door. "He's not himself. Just... remember that." He sounds hesitant, concerned, but Ahsoka assumes he also knows she's not exactly planning on going anywhere. "I have to meet with the Council, but if you need anything..."

She nods again, and scurries into the room.

Anakin is alone in the room when Ahsoka enters. He looks up at her, offers half a wary smile. "Snips." His voice is incredibly hoarse, barely a strained whisper, but the fact he makes the effort tells her that maybe Obi-Wan is wrong about him not being himself. So far, he seems very much like Anakin always has been.

"How are you feeling?" she asks, perching on the chair beside him, brushing her fingers gently across the back of his hand. The muscles there jerk and twitch, but he doesn't pull away as she'd almost expected him to.

He gives a one-shouldered shrug, the off-white tunic he's been given to wear slipping down a bit to expose the sharp jut of collarbone that hadn't been quite as extreme the last time she'd seen him. "Okay," he croaks, but she still can't quite feel him in the Force and she's not entirely certain he's telling her the truth. Still, he doesn't seem different - just like he'd been rescued after multiple months of torture. "Thanks. For coming after me." He reaches up and tugs at a strand of his hair - okay, that's a new gesture, but she'd been expected so much worse; a new nervous habit hardly seems like the worst that could have come of things. "I'm sorry you had to, uh, see what you saw." Which means he knows she knows about the rape, at least. Or maybe he just means having to see him in the aftermath of a suicide attempt - his left wrist is still bandaged, which means either the wound hasn't fully healed, or the Healers don't want him seeing the scar yet.

"I'm just glad you're back," Ahsoka replies instead of addressing any one thing she's seen directly. She's very glad he's back, in fact, so much so that she's afraid to admit it out loud because it absolutely reeks of attachment of a very dangerous kind. She wants to kill Omega for what he did, and that, she knows, is not the Jedi way. "Do you need anything?" She doesn't want to leave, wants to make herself useful - the room is almost entirely bare, surely he could use some kind of creature comforts for however long he's supposed to be cooped up.

He stares at her for a long moment and tugs at his hair again, twisting the strand around his finger and pulling, then moving onto a new strand. It makes him look twitchy, which is not something she's used to. "The cart in the hall," he rasps, "can you grab me what's in the top drawer?"

Ahsoka furrows her brow slightly, but nods, darting into the hall. The drawer he'd indicated is locked, which seems odd to her. If there's something he needs in here, there shouldn't be any reason for it to be locked. Waving a hand to dislodge the locking mechanism, Ahsoka feels her breath freeze in her chest when the drawer slides open.

Row after row of narcotic-filled syringes stare up at her and suddenly Ahsoka understands exactly what Obi-Wan had meant. It takes her a long moment to regain her bearings, the idea that Anakin had just lied to her - or at the very least asked her to be complicit in something harmful - makes bile rise in her throat. She closes the drawer, locks it once again, and takes a deep centering breath before returning to Anakin's room.

"I couldn't get it open," she says softly because she's not going to accuse him of anything and have him shut her out. "I'm sorry." Not sorry she's lying, but sorry that she has to lie at all. Sorry whatever has been done to him goes so deep beneath his surface that he'd ask such a thing of her so quickly.

Anakin's expression shifts slightly - he'd been looking somewhat eager, but that slides quickly into annoyance and he closes his eyes for a brief moment. "No big deal," he replies, as if it's the most normal thing in the galaxy. His eyes open again and he gives her a quick smile. "Thanks for trying."

The fact he doesn't realize she's lying says more to her than his actual response and she feels a chill run down her spine. Perching herself on the chair beside him, she tries to shake off her discomfort. He hasn't been back very long, and has only been fully conscious for a few hours. She can't be angry about this, can't allow herself to be disheartened. He's her Master, and her responsibility, and as long as they stick together they will weather this storm.

Obi-Wan doesn't come back to visit after the first day, but Anakin is okay with that. Obi-Wan brings with him memories best left buried deep, a promise of further pain. Because all that Omega does is for Obi-Wan's benefit, or so he'd been told, and Anakin is tired of being the bait.

He knows better than to vocalize any of this, to the Mind Healers who have tried to get past his shields, or to Ahsoka who dutifully keeps him company hour after hour. He doesn't ask her to fetch anything for him again; it was unfair to do it the first time around, and the last thing he wants is to make things harder on himself. Still, the desire is there, prickling his skin and making him edgy, making him snap at her when he doesn't mean to, making him almost reach out to offer her what he KNOWS he really shouldn't (she's so young, and his Padawan! But hadn't he entertained fantasies of his Master at her age?).

Still, he makes a show of getting better, because the longer he's in the Halls of Healing, the less peace he's able to find within himself. He's growing agitated and fearful and he needs to simply get out from confinement. He's been confined for far too long.

Ahsoka picks up on his moods, perceptive as she is, and petitions to have him released into her care. She promises to keep an eye on him, as if he's not an adult and her Master and capable of taking care of himself - he knows she disagrees with the Healers about his capabilities, and that gives him a sense of relief. At least one person around here isn't treating him like a fragile piece of glass. Finally, the release is granted and he's back in his own apartment, staring at walls that are at once familiar and completely foreign.

"I made tea," Ahsoka's voice cuts through, and he follows her to the sitting area. He knows he has to have medications in here somewhere, kriff, even some crap Alderaanian grass would be welcome at this point, anything to temper the voice in his head telling him that Omega escaped, and nothing he or Obi-Wan or Ahsoka could do will ever keep him truly safe. The same voice admonishes him for being a coward in the same breath, and it's all he can do to keep from screaming.

Her hand on his arm does make him jump slightly, but he manages to slow his breathing, sit with her. Focus on the here and now, he reminds himself harshly. Focus on Ahsoka. Focus on getting back to her training. "I hope you haven't been getting lazy with me gone," he comments as she pours the tea.

She snorts. "Hardly," she snips back. "Though I'm pretty sure you're going to need some practice in the training salles." It's a cheeky retort, one he'd expected, and one that's likely very true. He doesn't want to take her up on the obvious offer, though, not just yet.

"Probably," he agrees, and leaves it at that. The silence that descends is comfortable, but the insistent voices that take its place moments later are not. Anakin fights through it, feeling altogether isolated despite the presence beside him.

'Should have tried harder to die,' the voice informs him, and Anakin stands abruptly, blinking. Ahsoka is at his side in an instant, asking if he is all right and all he can say is, "I'm fine. I need to go for a walk. Clear my head."

He hopes she won't follow.